(You can make it up for safety reasons)

My name is ____ and I'm ____ years old. I have a ____ boyfriend and ___ friends. One day while I was walking in the _____ I saw a ___ run past me. I was so surprised that I spilt ____ all over my new ____. I decided to chase after the ___ to seek my revenge. My ___ boyfriend ran up to me and said "________." After that my day just kept getting weirder and weirder. My ____ fell in the ___, and to top it off, my mom_______.

Winner of the funniest one gets a shoutout three of my books and a follow.