You broke me first
Conor Maynard (cover)

"Now suddenly you're asking for it back
Could you tell me, where'd you get the nerve? Yeah, you could say you miss all that we had but I don't really care how bad it hurts"

"Call me when you're at home!"

Taehyung's voice plays on repeat in my mind. His dark, smooth and sexy vocals are doing things to me, I had no idea a voice could affect me this much. It's not just his voice, everything about him is fascinating. Even though I just met him for the first time, there is something mysterious that captures my soul in a way I never felt before.

The delicate droplets cover my body in a warm embrace and clean the evidence from the latest adventure with Taehyung. I still feel his fingerprints on every part where he touched me, and I caress each one softly, memorizing the things he did to me. Taehyung was dominant yet gentle, a very deadly mix that took my senses hostage. He could have done anything to me and I would've liked it.

I don't have much sexual experience with different men, to be exact only with my ex Yoongi and the stranger from the club Jimin, but I can tell that Taehyung is more gifted on that specific part than the other two. The current soreness between my legs is proof. This morning when he woke me up while being filled with him inside me was amazing yet a bit painful, still a good kind of pain. At first, I was scared he wouldn't fit, not only because of his thickness and length but because of his slightly curved shape. But in the end, that's what made me see the stars when I reached a few wonderful orgasms. It did hit the perfect spot.

Thinking about it now, it was very erotic and he did things I always wanted to try. Same with the choking and permitting him to take control over my body, all these things were a first for me. Sure Yoongi took over my body but he did that on his own, it's another feeling if you were asked for agreement. The arousal behind the question is on another level, waiting for the things the other person wants to do with your body is more thrilling and intense.

I need to see my gynecologist if I want to meet him again. The best part was being disturbed by our friends and the fact that we hadn't any protection left. Feeling him raw was sensational and I would definitely like to repeat that without disturbance. Taehyung doesn't look as if he didn't touch a woman for that long period;one year! To be honest, that man could have different women each day if he want to. He looks like a player but his behavior is more of a gentleman.

Maybe he's a Casanova?

I wrap myself in a fluffy towel and take my phone to check if anyone contacted me, but there is none. "Call me when you're at home!" Taehyung's statement shoots in my mind and I quickly tip dance with my feet on the ground, feeling the excitement in every fiber of my body jumping. What should I say? Hello, I arrived home…? Wow, Crystal, bravo. Why am I nervous? It's just a call, calm down!

"Hello?..."

Oh shit, I didn't realize that I already pushed the call button. My heart is jumping out of my chest at the sound of his deep voice. It's even deeper on the phone.

"Ehm, hello?..."

"Tae? Sorry, it's me, Crystal."

Squeeze your butt cheeks together and speak properly girl. You're a grown-up, woman!

"Mhh, what took you so
long to call me?"

"Why? Were you waiting
for me?"

"Yes. Anything wrong
with that?"

God, this man. Why is he so freaking honest? I love it. I didn't expect this answer.

"No, of course not. It's nice to
hear that someone is waiting
for my call. I needed to take
a shower first!"

"Mhm, I understand.
So you took a shower
to clean the dirty stuff we
did, away?"

Wow, does he need to remind me about that now? I'm still naked beneath the towel and the sensual sound of his vocal is tickling between my legs.

"Well, I tried. What are
you doing?"

"I'm laying in my bed and
holding a black tank top in
my hand. But it's not mine."

"Oh, shit, did I forget that
at your place? I knew
something was missing
when I took off my clothes."

We start laughing and the sound of his laughter makes me happy in a kind of way. I don't know Taehyung, but knowing that he got his heart broken makes him my companion. It's not pity what I feel for him, it's more an understanding. I'm the same, a broken-hearted girl.

"Did you get home safely?"

"Thank you, yeah. We found
the exit and our car!"

"I'm sorry. I would've led you the way out but as we told you, the part where we live are a lot of Koreans, and this community's eyes are everywhere."

"Oh, no problem Tae, I know that too well. I bet Kook was nervous. His expression was of a scared little kid."

"You don't have any idea. His parents live in the next building and he was scared. We just don't want to uproar any rumors because that would not be that nice."

"Hm, are they that strict? I mean
I know that Asian parents are
a bit hard and more focused on
how they show themselves
to society."

"Hmm, sugar, it's complicated. It's not that Koreans don't like other races, but the community we live in, are more of the old-fashioned ones. They're narrow-minded."

The tone in Taehyung's voice dropped to a more quiet and shy one. I don't want to dig deeper on that matter. It's not even a big deal that Naomi and I had to leave his apartment alone.

"You don't have to explain yourself, Tae. It's ok. I understand that very well. And the fact is, Naomi and I are old enough to find the exit of a building and to search for our car on our own!"

"Do you know that you're amazing?

This confession makes me choke on my saliva when I drop myself onto my bed and start to giggle. As if I'm a little kid.

"What? Why don't you believe me?"

"Why would you say that
I'm amazing? Or do you mean
amazing in that…"

"Oh, that, you're fabulous in
that topic too but I mean it.
You're very easy."

"Ok, that sounded wrong...I hope you didn't mean it that way."

"Ah. Oh God no! Not in the slightest!
I'm sorry I didn't use my words correctly. What I wanted to say is, you're uncomplicated and easy to talk to.
You have something very soothing in your persona that kinda feels like home. As if we know each other."

I gulp at his words. How can he touch me so deeply with a few spoken sentences? Taehyung surprises me more and more.

"You'll laugh, but I thought the same about you. Well, you're still a mystery
to me but at the same time, I feel comfortable when I talk to you. Maybe it's because we're sitting on the same boat. We understand how
the other feel and we're both…"

Silence. The words need to be wisely chosen to not hurt or offend him. That's the least I want. I listen to his breathing and struggle to find my words.

"We're both lost! Is that what you're searching for?"

"... Yes...lost. We're both lost."

"See, that's what I meant. We connect well!"

Taehyung is right. I didn't think of that word, yet it's the best to describe our current emotional state. Lost. A simple phrase that holds a lot of meaning as pain, sadness, and desperation. We got our heart broken and it seems the wound isn't healed, yet. Not his nor mine we're still figuring out how to live with the leaking open wound. Both of us are emotionally vulnerable and craving someone to trust. For someone, whom we could show our weak moments.

Kim Taehyung is my companion.

°♡°

In the last few nights, I didn't get enough sleep but whenever a new day started, I felt energetic. Taehyung calls me every night and we talk for hours until we fall asleep. He works a lot and is often around 3 am at home but we can talk freely when he works his night shifts at the pizzeria, delivering the orders of the customers. It's so easy to talk to him and it's been kind of a routine for me that he calls me. 

I even catch myself waiting for his name to appear on my mobile phone and when I read Taehyung, my heart starts to jump out of my ribcage. Maybe this will end soon, maybe he'll get bored of me and won't call me anymore! It wouldn't be the first time that someone would leave me. I should be used to it but hopefully, it'll be different this time.

"Why is she grinning like that? Did I miss something interesting?" A quiet voice whispers from somewhere behind me while I sort the rails of clothes.

"She had sex and looks like it was really good." A female voice answers back. "I heard her moans from the other room." She says chuckling.

"Oh, that's why Bambi is so happy nowadays!" 

"Hey, that's not true! He has nothing to do with my mood." I caught Naomi and Jin behind the mannequin hiding and chatting about me. These two are childish and when they're together it's even worse.

"Yeah, sure, he has nothing to do with that." Naomi playfully pouts her lips and tries to mock me. "Gosh, Jin, you should've seen them. That guy was eye fucking her while she prepared breakfast. I swear, if Jungcock and I weren't there he would have eaten her and not the delicious food."

Jin nods his head in amusement and raises a teasing brow at me.

"That is not true! Jin, don't believe her_"

"Oh, of course, cause you have eyes on your back, right? You didn't see how Tae was watching you with eagle eyes. I mean, hey that's good for you. I think you found your sex friend!" 

"Naomi!" My friend runs away with a devilish laugh before I have the chance to shut her mouth. Jin giggles, finding the situation funny when he approaches next to me and starts to help me out with the clothes. Although I see my boss as a friend, he is still my boss, and I can't help feeling nervous and a bit ashamed of what just happened. My head is in an apologetic posture, not daring to look at him.

"I'm happy to see you lighter and rawer." The gentle and soft tone encourages me to meet his eyes.

"What do you mean?" Not understanding what he refers to, I ask him with furrowed brows.

"Let's just say, the guy you've met has a positive impact on you. Currently." Jin taps my shoulder slightly with his hand and I'm still confused about the meaning of what he meant.

"It's nothing serious. Tae and I had a good time and that's it!" 

"If you say so. Sure." The blond-haired man does the same as Naomi, he just walks away and waves his hands. These two! Why confuse me and not reveal the answers. I, myself, am uncertain about the situation with Tae! All I know is we're connecting well.

But again, I think that's because we're both in a state where we're searching for someone who understands our pain and sorrow and we happened to find it in each other. 

From what Tae told me, he is the only one in his group of friends that was deeply in love. Jungkook and his friends are not into serious relationships. All I know about Taehyung's ex is that she's Korean and they started dating when he was 18 years old. Whenever I ask something about her, he seems not ready to talk about her, yet. It's not my business though. If he's ready to talk about her, he will.

I'm daydreaming again, but a shadow shakes me awake. The fragrance I once loved to smell but now get nausea whenever I reek his perfume, is triggering every hair on my body to soar up from my skin. I rapidly shift to the side and turn around to verify the person. The sight of him in this store is a disturbance. This fashion is not his taste, so why is he here?

Yoongi's eyes meet mine and the corner of his lips lifts to a smirk and my blood is entirely boiling. "What's up? Long time no see."

I try to be calm and not show any reactions to this man, he doesn't deserve any emotional actions. Not from me! "I think you stepped your feet into the wrong store. We don't sell your kind of style." Squeezing a smile is like walking in a marathon, that's how hard it is to act friendly. Without any other attention given to the man I once adored, I continue my work and turn my back to him. 

"You look sexy in those tight skinny jeans, it embraces the part I loved the most on your body!" He takes a step closer, grabs my ass cheeks in his hands, and squeezes my butt roughly.

My eyes could fall out of my head if I open them wider. The shock paralyzes my entire body for a second till I gain my conscience back, and push him away from me, frowning. "What the hell, Yoongi?" I whisper shout at him to prevent any awareness from other customers.

The disrespect in his attitude and behavior upsets me to the point where I want to kick him between his legs and watch him suffer, holding his manhood in his palms while crying out in pain. That would be a nice view on him, for once. But instead, he's grinning mischievously at me. "I know you liked it, Crys. Your body must have been missing the touch from a man. Our last sex_"

"Exactly our last time was long ago, and you will never get this body to touch ever again!" Does he think there is only Min Yoongi in my life?

"What do you mean? Do you have a boyfriend?" His brows meet in the middle and despise, decorating his expression.

"That's none of your business! You live your life, and I live mine." With folded arms in front of my chest, I state.

Yoongi however, steps right before me and grabs my wrist harshly. He pulls me against his figure, holding me in place when I try to wiggle from his forced touch. "Do you think I let you go that easily? You are mine, Crystal Miller."

A little chuckle leaves my lungs and the male stares at me confused. I induce to face him and make sure to slightly brush our skin together. Our breathing meld together, that's when I speak, "You lost the title to call me, yours when you decided to put your disgusting cock into another woman's something! Remember, you were the one who decided that I am not enough for the great Min Yoongi."

Yoongi's gaze used to tell so much but now his stare is empty, and I feel proud, almost sorry, but I won't let him have his way and think I couldn't live without him. Yes, I miss him but I don't want him back, cause the man I'm missing is long gone. This man in front of me is a stranger.

"Is everything alright here?" My hero arrives at the right time and Yoongi finally lets go of me. Jin immediately moves next to me and his gentle touch on the little of my back calms me down, feeling the safety from my fairytale Prince. "I think it's better if you leave this store, Sir!" He gestures to the exit and Yoongi strides out without a word.

As soon as he leaves Jin-Fashion my body collapses but before I hit the ground, Jin catches me and takes me, bridal style, into his office room. This was too much and I'm still shaking from all the emotions I'm feeling right now.

Anger. Hate. Disgust. Disappointment. Fright.

💋🐼🌸