Love me again
V

"Fine, I will be honest with you
Put it all out there
I think about you all the time
Where you are, who you're with
Lost without you, baby."

As I approached Crystal's place, I spoke with Jimin over the phone. During our conversation, I explained to him that I wouldn't be able to go out with them tonight. Despite my apologies, my best friend understood and reminded me to drive carefully. It wasn't the first time he had warned me about my reckless driving, but I appreciated his concern nonetheless.

I frantically press the elevator button, my finger tapping it repeatedly as though it could make the elevator arrive any faster. My heart is racing with worry and anxiety as my mind is consumed with thoughts of the woman I love. The sound of her voice on the phone still echoes in my mind, and my gut clenches with the memory of the sadness in her tone. I pray she is safe and sound, and my mind races with worst-case scenarios. The seconds feel like hours as I wait for the elevator to arrive, my mind running wild with thoughts of what could have happened.

The elevator doors slide open, and I step out eagerly onto her floor. After what feels like an eternity, I finally reach her apartment. I raise my hand and knock softly on the white door. The sound echoes through the hallway, and I can feel my heart racing with anticipation. The door opens, and I can't help but feel a sense of deja vu as memories of the last four months flood my mind. It seems like only yesterday when I stood on this very spot, staring at the closed doors, yearning to see the woman I love once again. Finally, after what feels like an eternity, I'm here.

When she opens the door, her head hangs low, and the apartment is dark and silent, except for her tears. She's dressed in all black, which is very unusual for her. I can see the pain and sadness in her eyes, and it's breaking my heart. Without a second thought, I take her into my arms, feeling the warmth of her body against mine. At that moment, I realize I didn't ask her permission to touch her, but she returns the embrace, and I feel her body relaxing against mine. I tighten my grip, holding her close, and I can feel her little sobs slowly subsiding as we stand in the darkness.

Her body is shaking. I'm worried something terrible happened to her. I guide us to the couch and make her sit. Kneeling in front of her, I check if she's hurt somewhere, but I don't see any bruises. Thank God. "Love, what's wrong?" I ask while taking her cold hands.

"You came?" Crystal says, her voice is merely a whisper.

I brush a strand from her face, and I get a view of her red, teary eyes. "Of course, you called me! " My heart is wrenching at the sight of her crying.

"My dad... " She stutters; my stomach feels sick at the thought her father could have hurt her. Pictures of inappropriate actions are blinding my mind. I am on the verge of punching someone at the thought of him touching my woman. "Today was his funeral. He passed away a few days ago." Crystal finally says, calming my wrath from building up.

Sitting next to Crystal, I can feel her small frame trembling with sobs. The silence in the room is only broken by her quiet weeping. Her apartment is sparsely furnished, with everything in its place as if it's never been used since I've left. I take in the neatness of the surroundings, which contrasts sharply with the chaotic state of Crystal's appearance. She looks like she hasn't slept in days, and her eyes are puffy and red from crying. "I'm sorry for your loss," I whisper, hoping to offer some comfort. My embrace is the only solace I can show her in this moment of grief.

Why is she alone in this kind of situation? She could've stayed with her siblings, yet I know she didn't feel comfortable at her father's home. Despite her past and what he did to her, she went to his funeral,  sending him off with gratitude and respect for raising her. "Do you need anything?" I ask.

The woman, who appears small, shakes her head several times as she sobs uncontrollably. I can tell she is in distress and needs comfort. She takes a moment to wipe her tears before speaking. "I'm sorry to ask, but please stay the night. I don't want to be alone, and I don't know, but you were the only one I could think of." As she says, I can't help but notice her striking chocolate-colored eyes. They stare straight into my soul, causing my heart to skip a beat.

"It's a pleasure, love," I can't help but feel a sense of excitement rush through my body. Even though the occasion isn't the most appealing, I've been yearning to see her, to feel her warm body, and to speak to her face-to-face. The anticipation has been building up for what seems like an eternity, but finally, I find myself standing beside her. As I look into her eyes, I feel a sense of peace wash over me, and I know that being with her is all that matters now. It's a pleasure to be in her company again, and I savor every second of it.

I guide Crystal towards the bathroom and encourage her to take a shower, knowing that it will help her to relax after a tense few days. She doesn't resist my suggestion, and without any hesitation, she heads straight into the bathroom. As I stand outside the door, I hear the soothing sound of droplets hitting the marble floor of her shower, and I am grateful that she is finally getting some peace.

As I take off my jacket and walk through her flat, my eyes are drawn to a framed picture on the TV board. The silhouette of the image immediately brings back memories of a terrible time in my life, flooding my mind with emotions that I had thought were long forgotten. It was one of the most challenging experiences I have ever faced, and the mere thought sends shivers down my spine.

The picture is of our dear baby angel, and it breaks my heart all over again. I can feel the pain and sadness wash over me as I stare at the little frame, remembering the happiness that once filled my life. I can't hold back my emotions, and I collapse to my knees, clutching the picture to my chest.

My heart aches as I reflect on how cruel the world can be. It's hard to fathom the depth of pain that my love, Crystal, had to endure. As I sit here looking at a photo, I can't help but think of what could have been - a beautiful baby, a precious new life. It isn't easy to accept that we should have met our angel in just a few short weeks. But fate had other plans, and the universe took our angel from us before we even had the chance to say hello. The grief and sorrow we feel are immeasurable, and it's hard to find the words to describe the void that has been left in our lives.

Crystal has gone through an incredible amount of trials and challenges in her life. Despite everything she's faced, she is mentally far more robust than I could ever hope to be. If I had to endure even a fraction of what she's been through, I fear it would break me entirely, and I would never recover from the pain. Crystal is truly a fantastic person and deserves all the love, support, and admiration in the world for her remarkable resilience and strength in the face of adversity.

I suddenly become aware of the sound of an essential turning in the lock, which draws my attention to the bathroom. As I approach, I notice that my little panda hesitates to come out but eventually steps out, wrapped only in a fluffy towel. My gaze is drawn to her naked body, which elicits a warm blush on my cheeks. The droplets of water on her skin make it glisten in the dimmed light of her living room, highlighting the soft curves of her body. The steam from the bathroom envelops her, making her look like a goddess emerging from a misty realm.

Crystal walks across the room; her tiny, wet footsteps echo on the wooden floor. Suddenly, she stops and mumbles something under her breath. "I forgot to take my clothes," she says. Without wasting time, she heads towards her closet and takes out her pajamas. I feel tempted to watch her getting dressed, but I respectfully lower my gaze and turn my back to her. The room is silent except for the faint sound of rustling fabric as Crystal changes into her nightclothes.

Turning around, my eyes meet the sight of Crystal standing motionless in the darkness of her bedroom. The faint light from the window reveals her silhouette, and I can see that she looks lost and sad. It seems like she's waiting for something or someone, lost in her thoughts. I can't help but notice that she has lost weight, and although her curves are still there, I can see that she's thinner than before. Her appearance is a stark contrast to the vibrant and lively person that I used to know.

Grieving has many stages and can expand for years. Every time I think about the fact that she is going through such a difficult time all alone, my heart aches. I wish she would let me be there for her, to take care of her and help her through this. Seeing her struggle through this alone is one of the hardest things I've ever witnessed.

I  take careful steps towards her; I feel my heart racing in anticipation. She stands with her back to me, her shoulder slightly slumped and the straps of her top hanging off, exposing the smoothness of her skin underneath. I take a deep breath, struggling to control my emotions as I approach her.

As I draw closer, I can feel the heat radiating off her body, and the scent of her perfume fills my nostrils. I try to maintain my composure, but I can feel my desire building. Every inch of her is captivating, from how her hair falls in soft waves around her face to the gentle curve of her hips.

Despite not touching me, this woman has a way of making me feel alive as if every sense in my body is on high alert. It's as if she knows the effect she has on me, and I can't help but be drawn to her like a moth to a flame. She is the embodiment of my dreams.

I help Crystal lay down the mattress and tuck her in with a cozy blanket. When I turn to leave the room, she reaches out and takes hold of my wrist. "Tae, could you please sleep next to me tonight?" Crystal's eyes remain averted, but a blush spreads across her cheeks. I can sense the vulnerability in her voice and the unspoken plea for comfort. Without hesitation, I lay beside her and take her hand in mine, offering her the reassuring presence she needs.

We lay in comfortable silence, the familiar warmth of each other's bodies providing security. Our fingers naturally intertwine as if they were made to fit perfectly together. I missed this feeling, the comfort of her tender skin against mine and the sweet fragrance of vanilla that constantly surrounds her. Crystal is here with me now, our eyes locked in a deep connection that speaks volumes without a single word. The moonlight that filters through the window illuminates the room in a soft, dreamlike glow, casting delicate shadows across her face. I can't help but admire how the wet strands of her hair frame her beautiful features, making her look even more adorable.

She leans in close and whispers, "I missed you," my heart races with excitement. The sound of her voice floods my senses with a pounding sensation that echoes through my eardrums. I can hardly believe my ears as I respond, "I missed you more than you could imagine." My heart swells with happiness at the thought of finally being reunited with the person I cherish most. The long-awaited embrace that follows feels like a dream come true.

Our bodies are tangled—hearts beating at the same rhythm. In this moment of intense intimacy, our bodies are pressed together, radiating warmth and setting the surroundings aglow. We are both emotionally overcome, and tears spill freely down our cheeks. Each sob and whimper is a release, a cathartic outpouring of emotion we have both held inside for far too long. As we cling to each other, we are lost in our world, a private sanctuary where nothing else matters except the depth of our connection.

The weight in my chest feels like a burden too heavy to bear, and I let out a long breath before turning to look into her warm, chocolate-brown eyes. My heart aches with longing as I pour out my deepest emotions to her. "Love, I need you back more than anything. Life doesn't feel the same without you by my side. Even breathing is a struggle when you're not with me. I miss every little thing about you - waking up to your soft touch in the morning, the sound of your voice while you tell me about your day, and the joy in your laughter when I play a prank or hug you too tight. I miss us, Crystal. I miss everything about the beautiful connection we shared." My words flow from the depths of my soul as I confess my love and yearning for her.

She shifts closer, her fingers delicately caressing my neck, sending shivers down my spine. I can't help but notice her sweet, dimple smile as it decorates her lips. The thought of kissing her runs through my mind, but I don't want to rush anything and risk ruining the moment. I find myself lost in her gaze as Crystal's following words hold me captive in a loving chokehold, leaving me yearning for more.

"I miss us,  too!" She confesses.

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