Tina

Did he kiss me in the morning to call it a truce or does it mean anything else?

I'm still confused as to why I behaved like a wife who was desperate for her husband and his attention. After remembering everything from last night, I wanted to go and hide somewhere without letting Rudhran see me.

I got dressed but was embarrassed to meet his eyes and stayed in the closet practising how to apologise to him. But when he knocked on the door and I heard his concerned voice, everything flew out of mind.

He was considerate about my dilemma and tried to clear the air. But I was so embarrassed of my behaviour and couldn't stop apologising to him. And I wasn't expecting him to kiss me.

I was shocked more by the knowledge that how his kiss calmed me than the fact that he kissed me. I kissed him back and it felt good. It was my first unforced kiss and I wanted to save it by overwriting the forced one by that creep.

To be honest, from the time Rudhran and I met on the day I returned with Thooriga, he has given me an assured and protective environment. He welcomed us warmly and was a silent listener.

Initially, we ended up in one or two awkward situations like when he lifted my face from Thooriga's shoulder to wake her up and during her birthday ball when Taran ran away leaving us alone. There was an instant connection between Taran and me but instant awkwardness between Rudhran and me.

On Thooriga's birthday ball, I should have walked away but something made me ask him for a dance overcoming my fear of men. He was gentle with me and I felt safe in his arms. But when we moved into the same room after our fake marriage, I started fearing unnecessarily.

During my days at University, I had crushes and tried to move on by dating a couple of guys. But I couldn't feel assured in their presence and ran away from the spot in the middle of the first date.

And with Rudhran, Though it was me who proposed for the fake marriage, staying with a man scared the hell out of me. I started blaming or misunderstanding him if we end up in an awkward situation. Despite being genuine, if someone is blamed, anyone will be angered. That's what Rudhran did too and taunted me in the morning.

If it was anyone else, he would have given in to the temptation for everything I tried last night. But Rudhran handled me with genuinity and put me to bed to sleep keeping his attraction towards me.

If my first shock after recollecting last night's incident was how I behaved, my second shock was his confession. I didn't know whether he really meant it or it came out in a moment to stop me from crying but I wish I was sober when he said that.

I remembered him saying how he felt attracted to me after his ex who betrayed him. I remember him saying how he wanted to kiss me two nights ago but took a step back. But I cannot remember how his eyes looked at me or how I felt when he said those words.

My inner girl who wanted a safe life with a person who can cherish her could have danced with joy. Else I wouldn't have kissed and did all those things with him. I just wish I could remember how our first kiss felt.

Did it feel the same when he kissed in the closet?

When our awkwardness turned into attraction for him?

Was my fear actually a defence mechanism of my attraction towards him?

When did he realise that he was attracted to me?

There are a lot of questions to be addressed and discussed with him but I'm scared how it might take a turn. I tried to take a look at him to know what he was doing and found him busily taking pictures. We are travelling in a 6+1 seater SUV with Saby bro driving the car and Raj bro in the front passenger seat. Thooriga and Tanya are sitting in the middle passenger seats, exactly behind them. And I'm sitting in the back passenger seat with Taran and Rudhran.

Raj bro was alert and looking around, while others were in awe at the surroundings. I looked out and realised we were riding on a narrow road between mustard fields. Realising that we are nearing my father's house, anxiety enveloped me. In fear, I closed my eyes and started fiddling with the hem of my shawl.

An assured press on my shoulder made me open my eyes and I looked at Rudhran. He gave me an assuring nod and smile and I nodded back at him. Our eyes locked for a moment and I wanted it to freeze forever.

"Tina, is this where DDLJ shot?" Thooriga's question distracted me and I averted my eyes towards her who was busily capturing pictures.

"It's in Gurgaon near NCR." Tanya and I answered in unison and I continued further. "But you can see similar types of mustard fields in Abohar and here in Toosa."

At the same time we crossed a sign board and Taran read it. "Vikram Singh Sarson ka khet, Dosa, Punjab"

"Taran, it's Toosa not Dosa." I corrected him.

"And it's Dosai not Dosa." Rudhran tried to correct me.

"Rudhra..." I started to give him a reply but Raj bro interrupted. "Dei, neethu thaan enakku advise panna. Ipo nee arambichitya?" He shook his head and turned around. (Hey, just last night you advised me. But you are doing the same.)

"Un kathaiyum en kathaiyum onna?" Rudhran countered back. (Are our stories the same?)

"Enavo neethu Kabhi Kabhi nadakatha mari pesura." The moment he finished saying, Saby bro pressed on the brakes. (You are saying as if Kabhi Kabhi didn't happen last night.)

The three of us almost dashed towards the front as we weren't wearing seat belts unlike others. Rudhran and I held Taran from falling in front but Thooriga turned towards us. "Chitha, Kabhi Kabhi ah?" She looked at him and me. "Tina, you didn't share with us!"

"Dei, pasanga munnadi en da?" Rudhran slapped his forehand, scolding Raj. (Seriously Raj, Do you have to say it in front of kids?)

"Chitha, moraila chithappa naalum age padi anna mari thaan so onnum illa. Neethu Kabhi Kabhi ah enna?" Thooriga probed him to say while Tanya and I looked at each other in confusion. (Chitha, though you are my uncle by relationship, you are almost like my older brother by age. Last night Kabhi Kabhi?)

Saby bro was silently trembling in laughter but Taran giggled out and Rudhran looked at him shocked. "Ipo ethuku da serikura?" He asked him with a raised eyebrow. (Why are you laughing?)

"Kabhi Kabhi...Mere dil." He took my shawl and mimicked like patting his back dry with a towel.

Thooriga, Raj bro and Saby bro slapped their forehead with irritation and turned around. The guards from the previous car and following car came to check on us but Raj bro sent them away and signalled Saby bro to resume driving.

"Taran, itha movie nee epo paatha?" Rudhran asked him sternly. (Taran, when did you see that movie?)

"Comedy scenes la pathen, pa." Taran's voice went low and he inched towards me with a pout. (I saw that in comedy scenes.)

"Idiots, kozhanthanga pakura show eppadi comedy scenes podrathu nu oru vevasta illa?" Rudhran murmured to himself before warning Taran. "Inime nee verum naan solra shows mattum thaan paakanum." Taran nodded his head before leaning on me. (Idiots! Don't they have common sense before telecasting such types of comedy scenes in a show seen by all ages?) (Hereon you are watching only the shows that I allow.)

"Dei, vidu. En mela thaan mistake. Naan yoshichu pesi irukanum." Raj bro tried to calm him down. (Rudhra, let it go. It's my mistake. I should have thought once before speaking.)

"Illa da, Naan enga thappu pani irukan nu enaku theriyuthu la. Ennum oru four or five years la avanuke puriya varum and science laiyum varum nammalum eduthu solla vendiyathu varum. Apo na paravala aana ipo kozhantha da avan. I should have been more cautious." Rudhran leaned his elbow on the door window border and hit his forehead with the side of his fist. (No! It's my learning of where I have gone wrong. In the next four to five, he will naturally get the knowledge or he will study in science, and a situation might occur when we should explain things to him properly. But he is a child now.)

I tried to reach my hand towards him and give him an assuring pat but stopped as Raj bro spoke up. "Rudhra, never forget that you are a great father. I'm proud of you, Machan." He batted his eyes as if controlling tears and turned front.

"You spoke my mind out, Raj bro." Raj bro looked at me through the rear view mirror and nodded with a smile. "Hereon, I'll take care of what he reads and watches." I said to Rudhran and he turned to look at me.

"We will. He is our son and it's our responsibility to take care of him, together." He nodded suggestively and held my gaze. Whether it was two nights ago or now, he hasn't singularised Taran's relationship with him or me. It's been us or ours not mine or my.

"Ohh Ohh...Ohh Ohh... Ohh... Ohh Ohh..." Thooriga started humming a song from the Roja movie and Tanya backed her up.

"What?" I glared at them both and they shrugged. I was to ask them to spill it out but my phone rang.

"Sat sri akal, papa ji." I received a call from my father. (Hello, papa ji.)

"Sat sri akal, puttar ji. Tusim sare kithe ho?" His voice was so excited, lifting my spirit and chasing away my fears. (Hello dear. Where are you all now?l

I looked around the neighbourhood before answering him. "Asim hora paja mitam vica uthe pahucange." I heard Mausi ji's voice behind him. (We will reach there in another five minutes.)

"Tina puttar ah rahi hai." His voice turned distant as he probably lowered the phone to end the call. (Tina is on the way.)

"All good?" Rudhran asked me and I nodded at him.

"All should end well." I sighed heavily.

"It will." He smiled, assuringly.

I'm yet to learn more about him as a person but as a father he is a wonderful father. To be honest, more than my father. He was a great father to me and my step sisters but he believed whatever my stepmother said, for which he cannot be blamed as even I didn't reveal their true colours. But Rudhran takes care of every tiny detail when it comes to Taran.

If Taran and I were the result of force but not love, Rudhran and Papaji are providing us the love through which we are supposed to be born. Papaji, accepted my decision of getting married to Rudhran but he still doesn't know the truth behind the marriage or Mausi ji's actual reason behind the marriage proposal for Sarabjit.

My fear is not regarding Sarabjit but regarding what my stepmother will say to Rudhran and his family members. I have told all my truths to Rudhran and his family but Papaji and Taran don't know what I went through and I don't ever want them to know. I don't want Taran to know about his reality and I will protect him at all cost.

The car came to a halt and I took a deep breath collecting my strength and courage. The cars stopped some houses away from mine as there was a tractor blocking the road. My house is the last house on the street, behind which our farming land is beautifully situated.

"Wait in the car." Raj bro requested before he and Saby bro got down from the car. A while later he opened the door and asked us to get down. Thooriga and Tanya got down first followed by Taran. Rudhran asked me to get down first and he followed me.

The family assembled together and I found guards lining at equal intervals from the car to my house. The people from our street looked at us in confusion and talked to themselves. "Uncle, I'll go first. Can you all visit a little while later? If all of us go together, they will be confused," I asked Thiyagu uncle.

"Don't they know that we are visiting today?"

"Papaji does, Uncle, but Mausi and others don't," I swallowed hard.

"Appa, naanum Tina vum munnadi porom neenga oru five minute kazhichu vaanga." Rudhran suggested and he nodded. I opened my mouth to protest but he interjected. "I'm not sending you alone." (Appa, Tina and I'll go first. You all please follow us after five minutes.)

We took a couple of steps away from the family and when we were away from earshots, I whispered to Rudhran. "Let Taran be Jeevitha di and your son. Let's not tell the truth."

"Why?"

"I don't want my father's relatives or Mausi to reveal him like they did to me." He nodded his head. "For just three years of drama, I don't want him to suffer for a lifetime." He stopped a couple of steps behind me and I turned to look at him. "What happened?" He shook his head, gesturing to me to take the lead.

It's been just a week and I don't know what's going to happen in the end of the three years but I'll protect Taran from everything which harmed me.

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Hey Lovelies,

Hope you have enjoyed this subtle update. Please do vote and share your feedback through comments.

Though I wrote this chapter when I finished the previous BH sequence update, I couldn't get time to continue with this sequence. But this chapter can be read as a standalone, so I'm updating it in the middle of TS updates. As I mentioned in the previous note, I was busy for past two days. Today took some medical tests and with all your love, the results which I received today are normal. Remaining scans have to be taken tomorrow. So I didn't get proper time to proofread this chapter and update it as I mentioned in the previous note.

From Friday evening, I'll resume with the TS dinner sequence. It's a 10 chapter sequence and I'll update them around 8pm to 9pm to match the beautiful evening aura. With those 10 chapters the London Flashback will be covered.

See you soon with the next update.

Thank you & Love
R.K. Tejaswi
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