Roger's P.O.V.

Myself and Deaky had been on our own date last night, nowhere fancy, just out for a meal and a drink after. It had been nice.

We were in bed and still awake when we heard the two of them return last night. I was desperate to go running downstairs and ask them how it had gone but John persuaded me to leave them to it and to not bother them.

I mean, they had both returned and had walked in the house without no raised voices being heard so those points put together must mean that it had been successful. Right? No arguing. And they both came home together.

John was as eager as I was to find out all the details but he didn't make it as obvious as I did. Making me wait till the morning until we asked.

We were not surprised that we had managed to persuade Freddie to go. We both knew that he wanted to deep down, he was just being a stubborn little shit. Of course he wanted to go.

Besides, who wouldn't want to get scrubbed up in a tux and have dinner at The Ritz?! He looked handsome.

I wish I would have had enough money to take Deaky to The Ritz for our first date but he didn't seem to mind, I took him to a nice restaurant and the rest is history.

"Do you think he'll be awake yet?!" I bounced around the room wanting Freddie to wake up so I could quiz him.

"Calm down, Roger! You're so bloody nosy." Deaky giggled at me as he changed out of his pyjamas.

"I know. But I need to know! And don't tell me you don't want to find out." I smirked at him.

"Of course I do. I'm just not as obsessive as you." He winked at me.
"Come on. Let the guy recover for a while. Let's have some breakfast first and then we can gently awaken him with a nice cup of tea and a long list of questions." John giggled as he dragged me out of the room and downstairs. Brian must also still be asleep.

"What do you want?" Deaks asked.

"Answers. I want answers." I was jittery.

"I meant for breakfast you idiot."

"Oh. Umm, toast. Yeah, toast, I'll have toast." I stammered.

"Do you want toast?" John mocked with a laugh.

I nodded quickly and sat at the breakfast bar, impatiently drumming my fingers on the surface.

John slid a steaming cup of tea over to me, "Y'know, anyone would think you wanted a part of whatever happened last night between those two."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"You seem a lot more interested in those two than you are with us two." He shrugged.

"Hey. That's not fair! You know that's not true." I argued.

"I was just joking." He shrugged again with his back towards me as he buttered some toast. Although, there was a slight tinge of bitterness in his voice.

I decided to ignore it. He was being silly.

He slid over a plate of toast and I began to lazily nibble at it, my ears too busy trying to listen if I could hear any movement upstairs rather than listen to what John had to say.

"Oi, cloth ears. Are you listening to me?" He asked.

I snapped my head towards him, "S-Sorry..."

He rolled his eyes and sighed, "Why are you so interested in those two?"

"Well, because they're our best friends. Why wouldn't I want to know if their first date went well? Besides, Freddie dedicated so much of his time trying to get us two together, I feel like we should do the same."

"I guess. We just can't manage to do much without him getting involved." He spat.

I narrowed my eyes at him, "Are you getting jealous? Because you know there's no need..."

"I'm not getting jealous, Roger. I just wish we could do something without him being there in some way or another or him finding out ten seconds after we've done something. And vice versa." He stropped.

"We do a lot without Freddie. And he does a lot without us. We live together, we're best friends and were in a band together. There's not a lot we can't do without him, or Brian." I stood up for them.

"Yeah well maybe we could've had sex for the first time without Freddie finding out less than a minute after you came." He glared at me.

"Woah. What the hell is going on with you?" I stood up and went over to him, "First of all, he guessed what we'd been up to. I never told him out right. Since when have you been bothered about him knowing these things?"

"Since you tell him everything and you don't even tell me. Like how you didn't really enjoy the first time we had sex? Yeah that's right, Roger. I heard you talking about that with him. I'm still waiting for you to say it to me. What about the second time? Was that as bad? The third? Fourth? What about last night? Was that shit too?" He shot me a sickening fake smile.

"Shit. John, I didn't mean it, I-"

"Of course you did. You wouldn't say it otherwise." He wouldn't look at me.

"It was our first time. It was bound to not be amazing. But it's getting better and better, last night was amazing." I stroked his cheek but he flinched away.

"You're just saying that."

"I mean it."

"So are you going to go and tell Freddie how amazing the sex was last night? Or are you going to go tell him about this argument and slag me off behind my back again? Honestly, Roger. It's like you want him to be your boyfriend." He huffed loudly and walked away from me.
"I'm going out for a bit." He walked out of the room.

"John? Deaky! Please...just listen?!" I shouted after him.

He stared at me whilst he put on his coat and shoes, he shook his head at me, "You're not even denying it." He snarled and then left.

I was left standing in the hallway completely flabbergasted by what had just happened. Where did all of that come from?

That was so out of order for him to say.

I do not want Freddie as a boyfriend. I may have the tiniest of guilty crushes on him but that's where the line draws. That's it. I'm interested in his life because he's interested in ours. It's called being a good friend,right? I don't want to disregard Brian or Freddie just because I'm in a relationship with John.

I thought Deaky would understand this. He was the one that I'd had a massive fancy for for ages, maybe a little bit towards Freddie too but he wasn't the one that I wanted to make mine and devote my life to, John was.
But maybe I had been making it a little obvious that I was more than just interested in how Brian and Freddie were going. After all...I did feel a little bit protective over Fred.

I'd watched him have his heart broken many times over and maybe I just didn't want it to happen to him again.

Maybe I had been a little obsessive. But Freddie had been with us too. But I had to give him a lot of credit for what John and I had. Without him I don't even think what John would have come out as gay and I would still be longingly staring at him wishing he liked me.

And I had said all along that I wanted to give back to Freddie what he had done for us and do the same for him and Brian. And I was...but maybe paying a little more attention to their blossoming status than to my own relationship.

I felt awful but I couldn't help it.

And I was so embarrassed that John had heard me talking to Freddie about the first time we'd had sex. I can't believe he heard me! I felt so guilty.
Now he's never going to think that I enjoy it. Which I do, it's getting better and better each time but now he'll never believe me. He'll always think I'm lying and telling Fred the truth instead of him.

Shit. I'd fucked up.

Where had he disappeared to? I was worried and I wanted to try and make it up to him.

The only problem was I wasn't sure if I'd be able to say to him that I won't get involved with Brian and Freddie anymore because I know I will. He gets involved too, he can't deny that, last night was a prime example, getting Freddie ready, if that wasn't interfering then what was it?

I just do it a little more than him and now I felt like I had been neglecting him. I couldn't believe that I'd been acting more interested in Freddie than my own boyfriend. And he's figure it out. And heard me talking about him.

And then I didn't even deny his last statement.