*after two weeks*

there were aromas of fresh baked cinnamon bread and chocolate around the house. the tall figure made its way around the light brown and white kitchen. grabbing ingredients and re-reading the recipe from the cookbook on the sturdy, clear kitchen island.

the air was warm from the radiator next to the brown, soft sofa and he turned it off when he felt like it was getting too hot for his liking. he checked the bread in the oven, poking it with a chopstick to see if it had fully cooked yet when a set of arms wrapped themselves around his stomach, lightly, as to not hurt the almost completely healed wound.

Soobin got up from his crouched position next to the over, something pressed on his back as he moved, and he inhaled the pine tree, citrusy smell.

"hey baby..." Yeonjun said while his face nuzzled in Soobin's shirt. "what are you making?"

the younger turned around, meeting with post shower Yeonjun that had dripped shower water from his hair on the wooden floor. the older was wearing a soft oversized pastel blue hoodie with black leggings. a drop of water hit his nose and he took one of the blue long sleeves to wipe it off.

Soobin smiled adoringly, his eyes turning twice as bright at the sight of his boyfriend looking like a blue teddy bear.

"I thought..." Soobin's hand went to circle Yeonjun's waist, pulling his closer. "that we could have dessert before dinner, I made cinnamon rolls" he kissed Yeonjun's cheek, pulling away just a little bit so that he could have a view of Yeonjun's eyes.

Yeonjun blushed, his ears turning a bright red shade while he tried to keep his heart in his chest and stop it from beating so loud.

before he knew it, he was in the air, legs wrapped around Soobin as the younger made his way over to the counter.

"what are you doing idiot!" he yelled "what about your woun-" a pair of lips on his shut him up and he was gently placed on top of the counter as Soobin pinned his hips down with his palms. Yeonjun moaned softly, his hand going to brush through Soobin's hair.

Yeonjun tilted his head, giving the younger a bit more space to work with while Soobin took the hint and his lips found their way to Yeonjun's Jaw and neck, while eventually biting a certain spot next to the older's ears.

"hey!" Yeonjun exclaimed while Soobin giggled in his neck. "what was that for?"

Soobin threw his head back, laughing hysterically while lowering Yeonjun to the floor.

"I need a better boyfriend..." Yeonjun mumbled to himself while putting on his house slippers and side eyeing Soobin who was clearly amused about the whole thing.

"Taehyunnie said he wanted something sweet so I decided to test my baking skills, do you want hot chocolate?"

Yeonjun huffed in fake annoyance which was clear because he still looked at Soobin like he was the one who hung the stars in the sky. his playful expression however dying slowly after hearing that their dongsaeng finally came out of his room today, not just to drink water or go to the bathroom.

"how is he..?" the older feels hesitant to ask while fixing Soobin's half fallen apron. he tries to make his tone light as possible but they all know it'll take time for everyone, and they mean, every single one of them to heal from what they went through.

it was no secret that two weeks ago they reached their lowest point. not just one of them, but all of them had a piece of their heart broken that night.

uncertainty, pain, hurt, sadness, fear, horror, anger. guilt.

these were not things that could disappear overnight. and they knew it.

"he's.... better. we talked a bit today, that's something, right?"

Yeonjun feels his airway closing as he fights off the sadness filling his heart when he thought about what Taehyun must've gone through. he didn't tell them. he couldn't. at least that's what he said.

he doesn't want to re-live it.

"what did he say?"

Soobin thought for a few seconds, his hand wandering around for something to do so that the air won't feel as thick as it feels right now.

"he said he's ready to eat dinner with us today... and that he's sorry for shutting off, but that he can't seem to let go."

"but it'll be okay thought, right?" Yeonjun asks, and something about his anxious tone worries Soobin as well.

"it'll take time. we knew that we had to wait..... " Soobin calmly explained while caressing Yeonjun's jaw in hopes for it to relief some of the stress he was feeling.

"it's already been two weeks." Yeonjun said while his head lowered to rest on Soobin's shoulder.

"we all miss him Hyung... we just have to wait a little bit more."

just a little more.

............

it's nice. that's the first thing that comes to his mind.

the covers provide him warmth, and he doesn't want to get up. so he lays with his eyes closed for a few more minutes, just enough for him to recharge.

he's calm.

that's the second thing he notices. there's no tension. there's no fear. no pain, no urgency.

he moves under the covers, his hand coming to rub his sleepy eyes, but something tugs on it, and with his other hand he rips it out. feeling how the action leaves small drops of unknown liquid on his finger.

the smell of chocolate finds its way over to him and he hums in delight. his hands move to push the blanket away from his face, and travels around his body, meeting with a weird fabric coating most of his upper back and chest.

one eye opens, his vision's too blurry, but he sees brown and light blue. he takes his time going from laying to sitting, and he opens another eye. the set scan the overly clean room in awe, they widen, taking all of the warmth in. he's on a full sized bed, filled with warm covers and pillows, on the right there's a window the size of the wall and it shows the view of a beautiful sea surrounded by houses just like this one. on the left side there's a chair looking thing, but it's wider, and it looks softer then the chairs he knows.

he takes off the covers, his eyes go to scan the bandages on his torso, going all the way over his shoulders and down his lower back. with shaking legs, he makes his way over to the window, his jaw falls at the sight of the blue water, and the waves clashing into one another while the sun sets, leaving streaks of warm, golden sunlight through the window and it hits his eyes in the most calming way way possible. and he takes it in. his legs feel weak after a few minutes and he plops down in front of the window, letting the golden hue color him while his eyes close.

he doesn't notice when a tear or two escape his eyes, and he doesn't notice when he hugs himself tightly. or when the door opens, and a big eyed boy in standing at the entrance.

a glass shatters and a yell is heard from downstairs.

the big eyed boy stands there, his eyes only widen further as he pinches himself to check if what he sees is his reality.

without much warning. the boy tackles the one sitting next to the window, knocking them both on the floor. someone bursts into tears, and one's shirt gets stained as they continue to lay on the floor, wrapped in each other's arms. both not wanting to let go.

"Hi angel..." Kai says weakly, his back against the floor and Taehyun's red hair tickles his chin. "I missed you.."

Taehyun's tears fells one after the one dropping down on Kai's neck and slid onto the floor, each one of them holding the amount of hurt he felt everyday on Kai's bedside, praying for the younger to wake up. every tear held the words he said to Kai on that day, every love confession. every "please" and "sorry" and "it's going to be okay", not knowing if it's an empty lie or a hopeful promise.

"he'll wake up Tae.. he has to"

"just wait, he'll be okay"

every tear held the screams, the pain, the helplessness they felt that night. and he was finally able to get them out. one by one, they rolled onto the floor, taking the pain with them.

"I'm s-sorry.." Taehyun said between his sobs.

Kai smiled, his eyes fighting tears as he looked up at the ceiling.

"let's not be sorry anymore.." the younger said after a few minutes. "I don't want to be sorry anymore. I don't want to be afraid anymore. not when I'm with you..."

"I want to live"

....................

they both squeezed themselves into the light blue armchair, covered by the blanket Taehyun took from Kai's bed. Taehyun's head leaned on Kai's shoulder while the other hand his arm wrapped behind Taehyun back.

they stared at the sunset at it's very end. cuddling against each other as close as they possibly could while Kai played with Taehyun's red hair.

"where are we?" the younger asks with genuine curiosity and Taehyun smiles warmly while picturing Kai furring his eyebrows like every time he asks a question.

"somewhere near Costa Rica.." Taehyun replies and Kai closes his eyes to let the honey voice take him in.

Taehyun giggles when he can almost feel the younger's confusion and goes to further explain his answer.

"it's somewhere in north America.." he says, but quickly realizes it must not mean much to Kai as well. as a guy close to his 20s without proper education for most of his life. "we're not in Korea right now."

"I know...." Kai responds quietly.

Taehyun tilts his head as if asking for an explanation.

"it's peaceful here.." the younger says, and it surprises Taehyun, that without much words, he was able to understand exactly what Kai meant.

the years of running to nowhere in particular only to run off again, and again, and again. not knowing when the chase will stop, will it ever stop? that's a question Taehyun's been asking himself for a long time. not anymore.

"are you okay?" Taehyun suddenly asks. his fingers play with the blanket as he enjoy the feeling of the younger's hand in his red hair.

"will it be okay if I wasn't?" Kai replies vaguely. and he waits for a few seconds before turning the question over to Taehyun.

"we... us two. we saw some things that night, that no one knows about." Taehyun says in response. "I keep, having nightmares.." he admits, and Kai nods quietly.

"I should've reacted quicker....when they, you know.." Kai says, and despite their promise not to feel sorry anymore, the guilt finds it's way back to him. the thought of Taehyun having suffered that badly because of him and his poor choices was not a thing he could ignore or deny.

"I never thought they were that..."

"cruel?" Kai chimed in and Taehyun nodded while trying to find comfort in scooching closer into Kai's body.

"there was nothing you could've done Kai, and nothing I could've done. and that's what made it so much more terrifying. because they gave us no chance, no option but to sit there and watch.." Taehyun said, closing his eyes tight as the sentence got harder and harder to voice out loud, his voice broke towards the end and Kai took notice of the quiver.

"hey.." and hugged Taehyun's shaking frame in his "it's okay.." he said, not giving a single though about how the roles have switches from when they first met until now.

"they t-took so much.." Taehyun said while burying his face in the crook of Kai's neck. "all I could do was s-sit there... "

"it's okay.." Kai rocked Taehyun back and forth.

"all I could do was wonder how you're still alive..." Taehyun whispered "while they took so much from you..."

"I'm all well now.." Kai promised. "and I won't let that happen again. to any of us"

Taehyun raised his head, looking into Kai's sincere eyes. the younger's beautiful eyes, the eyes he fell in love with.

"and what about us?" he asks.

Kai smiles shyly, his hand goes under the elder's chin and he gets impossibly closer, his lips peck the older on his and he pulls away slowly before finding himself already drowning in the elder's brown eyes. they stay there, both admiring each other, both wanting to stay in that moment forever while the night takes them under its wings.

and Kai goes in for another kiss, deeper this time, his slander hand goes behind Taehyun's neck and he pulls him closer, wanting to taste more of the sweet honey on his lips.

they pull away eventually, both panting and out of breath.

"that's a solid answer." Taehyun says jokingly and Kai smiles.

"I guess so.."

............

"damn, that was one large poop. I'm telling you no matter how much it tastes good, steer clear of black bean noodl- oh good.." Beomgyu stops when he's met with a not so pleasant face in his house. "Hiyyih's here.." he says with the outmost rotten face and unenthused voice.

"why don't you just throw up in my face or something.." she mumbles as she's doing the table.

"believe me, I'm trying my best not to." he says, sticking her tongue at her.

Hiyyih rolls her eyes while actively ignoring the chestnut haired boy and focusing on her task. all her energy going to not use her powers to bash something in his stupid looking head.

"okay.." Yeonjun drags his words awkwardly while eyeing the intense bickering. he had absolutely no idea why the two hated each other so much when they barely knew each other. plus, Hiyyih was Kai's only relative and they had to get along. not to mention the fact that they're all alive thanks to her, Beomgyu's attitude was definitely off for someone who was usually very friendly.

"why don't YOU help Soobin with the whipped cream while I help Hiyyih instead..." he took the utensils Beomgyu had picked up from the table and sent the younger to the kitchen.

the younger walks up to Soobin while the older mixes the batter earnestly.

"Bin Hyung.. Hiyyih annoys me. can we kick her out?" he asks as he pouts his lips knowing that that's Soobin's weakness, but the older does not bat an eye as he laughs.

"no, she's Hyuka's sister"

"okay, so how about I put on a obnoxiously pink wig and lipstick and you can tell him I'm Hiyyih"

"I heard that!" Hiyyih yelled from outside the kitchen and Soobin expression turned to a fond smile.

Beomgyu rolled his eyes at her comment before they landed on the whipped cream, and an idea slipped to his mind.

"That's it" Hiyyih turned red while the white sugary batter found it's way to her cheek and her eyes turned bright pink "I'm gonna kill you"

Beomgyu laughed hysterically, his laughter rings around the house while the two have a chase, he jumped around the couch and Hiyyih growled.

"Kids!" Soobin warned "Hiyyih! no powers around the house, I would like it to keep on standing you know..?"

Beomgyu's eyes sparkled and he smiled cheekily. "no powers around the house" he repeated Soobin's words in front of her face. "what are you gonna do- ahh!" she lunged onto him and they both fell, Beomgyu hitting the floor with his back.

she smeared he handful of whipped cream all over his face while laughing playfully.

"stop it you wench!" he whined.

"say you're sorry!" she yelled.

he put a leg behind her back and flipped her in a split second.

"never!"

"kids!" Soobin said, sternly this time. "get off each other. Beom, call Taehyun..."

Beomgyu got off Hiyyih, his winning face gone and replaced by worry.

"is he eating with us tonight?" he asked, a hopeful feeling in his heart while he waited for an answer.

Yeonjun sighed while drying off the plates and putting them on the table, with a lowered head and an exhausted expression. "he said he'll try.." he said.

Beomgyu's eyes went big and he went over to Yeonjun in hopes for more information on the boy he barely saw since they got here. he refused them taking care of him and Beomgyu would only see him coming out at night for a small snack before going back to his room doing god knows what.

"did you talk to him today? what did he say? is he okay? how sad is he from a scale of one to ten?" the younger bombarded Yeonjun with question after question.

"Beom."

Beomgyu's eyes went darker and he played with the ends of his cardigan.

"I just miss him"

Yeonjun nodded in understanding. it was hard for him too, to give Taehyun the space he wanted after years of taking care of the 4 of them so closely, it felt like they had lost a limb. and nothing could replace Taehyun's aura when he was in the room. not his sassy remarks, or his smart comments. nor his witty jokes that have stopped long ago.

"we just have to wait. for both of them..."

right when Yeonjun was about to give Beomgyu the daily "they're going to be okay" hug. sounds were heard from upstairs, and Yeonjun raised his head.

"slowly..." they heard a small voice coming from the stairs and a few footsteps "slowly.. there you go" Taehyun's voice became louder and louder and they all exchanged confused, shocked looks while eyeing the staircase.

"is that..?" Yeonjun mumbled to himself, eyes glued to the red haired boy coming down the stairs while supporting Kai who had a hand wrapped around Taehyun's shoulder.

"he's up.." Soobin smiled, knowing all along Kai was too strong to die before any one of them.

"KAI!!" Beomgyu sprinted up the stairs, causing both Taehyun and Kai to laugh at the elder's antics. Beomgyu gave the youngest a borderline deadly tight hug while breaking into tears.

"you're alive." the older whispered.

"yes Hyung... I am"

they went down the stairs slowly, Beomgyu still wiping his sudden tears while Yeonjun gave the two youngest a welcome back hug, it took everything in him to not cry, but this was a happy day, and they're going to stay happy until the end.

"there's someone here to see you" Soobin said to Kai, only giving the younger a small smile while gesturing him to look back.

Kai's heart filled with panic before turning back slowly and hesitantly. there was no one else he knew besides the people at the facility and the boys in front of him.

in an instant, their eyes locked. both glowing, both giving the room shades and pink and blue. Kai froze in his place. it was as if his brain has stopped working for a few minutes before when it came back she was already hugging him.

"oppa...?" she asks when his hands stay where they are, stiffly still beside his body. his eyes fill with tears, and he wonders if it's all just a dream. what if he actually died that night. and this is the heaven he went to. but it can't be, because murderers go to hell.

and he is a murderer. that's what they called him. for 10 years.

for half his life.

that's all he knew.

that he killed her, and for that, he deserves to pay the price.

"you're real right?" she asks, pulling away and scanning his face in all directions. "you're actually real?" she asks again waited for confirmation.

"I should be asking you the same thing, stupid." he replies after what seems like forever, pulling her into a bone crashing hug.

"oppa, it kinda hurts" she says, a wide smile on her face.

"you are like me.." he says, and his voice breaks.

"I was always like you"

.......

"kai-ah" Soobin pulled the younger to the other room after the reunion. with the consent of Taehyun of course, who was anxious to leave Kai's side, but trusting Soobin enough to let the two talk alone, after all, the second closest to Kai was the leader.

"I need to confess something" Soobin says, his apologetic eyes meeting Kai's hurt ones. the younger shed a few tears, already knowing where the conversation's going.

"I know Hyung... he told me"

.................

author's note:

I'm proud to announce that blue flame book 1 is officially completed!.

thank you for everyone who's been with me since the start of this fic, the middle of it and even people who joined right at the end. I had such a wonderful time working on this book and it has been a story that I had thought about before but only got to write now.

there will be blue flame too which will answer some of the questions on how they got to Costa Rica from Korea. how they got out of the facility. what happened the Yeonbin at the end and a lot more exciting stuff. a lot more fluff for sure but also angst cuz it's me after all.

also I couldn't leave you guys without a cliffhanger, I was going to put Sookai's FULL private conversation, but decided to leave that for book two:)

book two will come in a couple of months, in the meantime plz tune into "wildfire and rain" and another fic I'm starting around next week called "ignorance is a bliss"