H E R

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t r o y e   s i v a n

youth

❝ Glazed eyes, empty hearts ❞

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s e l f  e s t e e m

confidence in one's own worth or abilities.

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     When Pacifica had opened the door, she felt her heart lurch out of her throat. She hadn't expected Gleeful to come after her and apologize. She watched him, heart at her sleeve, and didn't know what to do. Usually, they didn't come apologize. Never. It felt odd, having someone apologize for what they did, rather than what Pacifica was used to.

     Her parents had always expected her to come and say sorry, even if they were at fault. It was tiring but the look of satisfaction on her parents face made her strive for more of it. Anything for them to be pleased with her.

      Anything.

      She knew while Dipper talked to her, she felt a tight knot inside her chest loosen every time. She knew she'd forgive him one way or another. Suppressing herself from a blown out smile, she just scowled at Dipper when she looked at her watch.

     "It's 1 in the morning, I'd rather not wake up late, Gleeful. Some of us aren't that privileged to not have to do chores," said Pacifica, trying to come off as annoyed, but she knew she was failing and she didn't mind. She crossed her arms and looked at Dipper, who was sporting an attractive smirk.

     "I know you enjoy my company, sweetheart," chuckled Dipper, his eyes flashing with arrogance. Pacifica snorted.

     "You wish. Anyways, it's the other way around," smugly smiling, Pacifica raised her eyebrows at the boy.

     "Please, do enlighten me how that is true."

     "Who came here to apologize, Gleeful?"

     "Oh," for once Dipper looked like he had nothing to say. But of course, that moment didn't last long. "It's because I'm such a gentleman," flashing a brilliant smile at Pacifica he stepped back. "Well, I do hope you realize I am sorry," and just like that, serious Dipper reappeared.

     "And I know you'll say it's okay, when it's not okay, okay? I can understand, surprise, surprise," muttered Dipper, coldly. Pacifica swallowed, it was like Dipper switched his personalities with a flick of his pretty wrist.

     "Well, goodnight, Gleeful, you pretentious maggot," chirped Pacifica, and closed the door after hearing Dipper's goodnight, which consisted of calling Pacifica a mad bat. Leaning against the door, she took a deep breath. Just being around him was making it harder to breath, his aura of importance and power rolled off of him like WAVES and hit the person he was talking to and he probably knew it.

      As much as she wanted to deny it, she was intimidated by that handsome devil. His looks were on a different level, and from what Pacifica had been told, he was pretty smart too, judging from his last years marks, which were said to be straight A+'s.

      She shook her head, she was thinking about him too much. She wondered what made him come here to apologize. What made the Dipper Gleeful apologize? And why? Pacifica sighed, feeling a headache coming. She didn't want to think about him anymore, with the butterflies in her stomach and what not.

      I do not like him, she said to herself, determined. And with that, she trudged to her bed and slept the long night away.

* * *

     The next day, Alexandria had came into Pacifica's room and rushed her to get changed and to meet her outside on the field. And with that, Pacifica was trudging outside, weaving her fingers through her hair and tying into a tight ponytail. Rubbing her eyes, she walked outside the doors to be met with a familiar mop of brown hair.

      A 'hey' died out when she figured he was ignoring her. Raising an eyebrow as she waved a hand in front of his eyes but he ignored her nonetheless. Around him were two other guys, one she recognized as Candy's cousin; Acid, and next to them a guy with piercings, black hair and vibrant green eyes.

     Acid and the other guy looked at her and back at Dipper, but he simply kept talking to the both of them, ignoring her as thought she were nothing but a nuisance. Rolling her eyes, she walked past Dipper and towards Alexandria who was next to Gideon, and Al.

      It hurt, because she thought they were beginning to be friends. Maybe she was mistaken? It didn't matter, because if he was going to be a  butthole, he'd better be prepared for the hell Pacifica'd give him if he expected her to be friends with him after this.

     "Hey guys," muttered Pacifica, trying a smile at the three of them. Gideon seemed more relaxed around them, which was a big thing because the kid was squeamish. Al looked more content, and less grumpy when Pacifica first met him.

      "Hey, Puffs! Okay, so school starts in a week, and we're going to be hosting a welcome party for everyone sometime this week, we're still doing the theme and everything, do you think you could help?" said a bubbly Alexandria.

     "Jesus Lex, I just woke up," muttered Al, rubbing the side of his head. I nodded at him, agreeing with him.

     "You guys need to seize the day! Bright and early! Ever heard of the early bird gets the worm?" scowled Alexandria to the both of us.

      "Ever heard of the night bird that also gets the worm? Also known as the owl?" snapped Al, although he didn't seem as rude as you'd think. His dark eyes underneath the sun seemed shades lighter and were almost a dark grey. His dark blonde hair looked fair underneath the glow, a halo forming around his high cheekbones  and brooding features.

      Pacifica hadn't noticed but Al was pretty handsome. She felt eyes digging into her back as she was talking with the three of them, and glanced behind her to catch Dipper in a fleeting glance. He clenched his jaw and turned away, his eyes leaving burning holes in Pacifica's back. Her cheeks flared up with anger, a desire to punch him never stronger than now.

      "Hey, Puffs, did you even listen to hear what I just said?" said Alexandria with an exasperated sigh. Al snorted and Gideon chuckled silently.

     "Nah, I'm sorry but I'm actually planning murder," Pacifica muttered darkly. Alexandria guffawed and Al had to stifle a laugh, while Gideon looked downright horrified.

     "Pacifica, who, and why!" he shrieked, raising his petite arms in the air. Al started to let loose his laugh, it was bright, unlike his usual moods.

     "Satan, because he's being a complete garbage bag," grumbled Pacifica, looking at her nails.

     "When and where?" giggled Alexandria.

      "I was thinking behind the school, if there are any dumpsters, maybe get a knife from the kitchen, cut him up into pieces, make dogs eat him, poop him out and then I'd garbage it to show his garbage personality and garbage looks and garbage - "

     By that point Gideon, Al and Alexandria had been doubled over in laughter, guffawing, snorting and God knows what else was to be describing their laughs.

     Pacifica allowed a small smile creep up to her face, she shook her head. "But no, seriously, he's being so mean and rude, I'd seriously commit murder if he were the victim."

      "I always knew you were a psychopath," muttered a familiar voice behind her. 

      "Dig a ditch and suffocate yourself, Satan," spat Pacifica, whipping around to see the boy. Stepping away, she crossed her arms, standing beside Alexandria. The black haired boy and Acid had stood next to Dipper.

     "Why do you have to be so difficult all the time?" said Dipper in a condescending tone, cocking his head to one side. It was almost adorable. That was before Pacifica was thinking about twisting his pretty neck, and wringing him to represent hangman.

      "What do you want?" seethed Pacifica, glaring as many daggers as she could to the boy.

     "I was hoping to discuss the party, seeing the Vice Prefects are your friends, and they advised me to ask you too, since you took Art as one of your subjects," said Dipper in a tone that literally dripped of 'I'm better than you and you know it'. Pacifica scowled.

      "Why couldn't you choose any other student who took Art?"

      "You've got the highest marks, and some of your teachers in your reports of school said that if anybody needed a party set up, it was to get your advice," said Dipper in a somewhat mildly impressed tone.

      "That's - that's a lie," stuttered Pacifica, obviously surprised. Why would he even go to the extent of looking at her past reports for anything of use?

      "Raising your self-esteem doesn't cost anything," said Dipper in a curt tone, "If you do agree to helping, meet me at my office, all of you, sometime today would be fine," and with that, the boy left, the other two trailing behind him.

      "I am so ready for murder," fists curling, Pacifica turned around, anger flaring inside her. He thought she was nothing, huh? She'd make him see she was not someone who you'd have a heartfelt talk with one day and ignore the other. And doing this party was perfect.

       "I hope you're joking now," Al muttered, crossing his arms. "So, what do you say?"

      "Let's do this, and crush all his hopes and dreams while we're at it," said Pacifica, grinning evilly. Alexandria and Gideon giggled, and nodded. Al simply smiled and shook his head.

      "You really are one of a kind," said Gideon, a genuine smile corrupting his adorable pale face.

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w a v e s

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Dedicated to: KatWriter02 Guys, honestly, do I even know where I'm going with this story, lmao, have a good day. :)

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i ' m

u p s e t

w i t h

m y s e l f

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