Year 847:

Eld Jinn: powerful, tactful, level-headed in a fight and calm even in a panicked situation. Responsible, firm leader, strong sense of duty. Realistic, diligent in his beliefs of what makes a good soldier - not afraid to tell others as such. Among the scouts, a veteran soldier; safely went on and returned from five expeditions. Proficient with the vertical equipment; tends to use fake-outs to work in tandem with his comrades and uses gas as smokescreen - will try that myself. Fearless. Solo Kills: 4, so far. Prioritizes assisting over upping his kill count. My top choice.

Olou Bozado: self-confident, outspoken, yet incredibly skilled. Has all the strength and instinct to back his words up. Focused and disciplined, yet haughty and cocky when danger has passed. Clumsy, ham-fisted. Incredibly competent with the vertical maneuver gear; scored very well among his cadet corps, and is not shy about stating as such. Strategic and fast, so personality quirks can be overlooked. Solo Kills: 15, so far. A true talent, works better on his own than with others, as is clear through his numbers - but can be a valuable subordinate.

Petra Ral: a conditioned soldier with excellent reaction time, honed instincts, and great perception and insight for dangerous situations and potential solutions. Petite woman, but does not let her small stature get in the way of her training - and is incredibly fierce and unyielding. Has a very kind, nurturing sort of nature; heard she is training under a field medic. According to evaluation notes, she is fiercely loyal to her leaders and comrades. Skilled with vertical equipment, but could use refinement. Solo Kills: 3, so far. Levi's first choice.

Gunther Shultz: dedicated soldier with a good head on his shoulders. Reasonable, dependable, strong. Excellent comrade, prioritizing safety of others over his own well-being, but not without reason, and is often seen aiding others take on Titans, even if he must go out of his way to do so. Dutiful, and proficient with the vertical gear. Capable of thinking on his feet, and is not rash. Rhythmic, tactical fighter. Hardworking and stern, and seemingly easily irritated, but stays focused. Solo Kills: 2, so far.

After reviewing my notes, I tucked my clipboard under one arm and continued to walk through the lines of soldiers. The sun beat down mercilessly, and I was rather grateful that I did not have to train today; at least, not out here. If I felt like it later, I could certainly go into one of the indoor training rooms, but right now... no, I found I far preferred this.

Soldiers were paired off for hand-to-hand sparring, and all the higher-ups were progressing, almost patrolling, through them at slow, easy, trained gaits. Now that we were a few weeks out from an expedition into Wall Maria, and since our newest batch of recruits - who arrived here just this spring, of course - had settled in, it was time for the squads to reshuffle and for the soldiers to all be sorted into their proper assignments.

And at long last, Levi and I would accept a group of soldiers into the Special Operations Squad.

It was incredibly exciting, and over the past few days Levi and I had talked over our thoughts quite a bit, shared our ideas, and kept a watchful eye over all the recruits. Our preliminary list at the start of this week had included ten soldiers, then by the next day, dropped to eight, then to five, and now to four.

If I was right... we found our soldiers. Our... Our subordinates.

Goodness, that was strange to say, but uniquely wonderful, too.

We had our pick of the entire legion, and based on the nature of the squad we were to construct, we had the first pick. I was excited, to be honest. Based on who we were watching, dare I say it... we took the best of the entire regiment, save for our fellow higher-ups. Oh, yes. We had some fine soldiers. All we had to do was formally invite them, sign off on the paperwork, and from there, it would be final. We would have a squad of our own, at long last.

The face of the regiment had shifted quite a bit over these past several months, and slowly our numbers were being restored. We were becoming steadier on our wings and seemed to find a steadfast updraft to settle on as we got used to our shifting responsibilities as soldiers, and grew ever stronger, day by day.

The year 846 had been difficult. The government had enacted a culling, a mass slaughter disguised as an attempt to push back into Wall Maria. It was sick, but it did alleviate some of the food concerns, so... it was disgusting, but it served a purpose, as awful as it was to say.

But this year was dedicated to piercing ever further into territory that was ours to reclaim, that which should never have been stolen from us in the first place. Notwitholding the struggles imparted on the citizens, the soldiers - who already relied on the taxes of the common folk to stay afloat - had it hard, too.

Our gear maintenance was reliant on the tools we already had, for we were not issued new ones; our gas consumption was monitored closely, for we were offered not even an ounce more than we were given; our rations were limited now more than ever; the food we were given was dry and lifeless, and our mealtime portion sizes even in the time leading up to expeditions when they were supposed to be bigger, got smaller.

It was rough. But we had to keep fighting. We had no other choice.

Still, excitement was mounting, and that was because the entire regiment knew that today, everyone would receive their new assignments, and since Erwin had told everyone this morning, it was now known through all the soldiers that even the Special Operations Squad was up for grabs this time around. Everyone was gunning for it. Why wouldn't they?

With the deconstruction of the Vanguard now that we weren't heading it, there were only a few positions worth being excited for: being promoted to a higher-up, being accepted into the commanding unit - of course, meaning you became one of Erwin's trusted colleagues and more likely than not, you were being considered for further training to become a higher-up - and finally, being led by us in the Spec Ops Squad.

All other squads, while important, were all on the same level. Recruits sorted into those squads were all base rank soldiers. It wasn't a bad thing, no. It just wasn't what everyone went for.

It didn't escape me, the way that the soldiers would all try a little harder to look more impressive when myself or Levi walked by. They'd put a little show on, trying to land the finishing blow on their partner while we were watching.

It was cute. It really was.

I guess they didn't realize that Levi and I had already made up our minds... and so had every other commanding officer here. This training was just... for training. That was all. What we were doing was just for show, to scare them all into working harder.

At one point, I slowed down by a pair of particularly tall, burly soldiers, each trying to brute force the other to their back. When one saw me, he flashed me a brilliant smile, told me to "watch this", and... with an awful misstep, was forced onto his back.

I stood, smiling a little. All I'd done was sweep my leg under his, sending him to his back in the dirt. "Never assume your only adversary is the one in front of you," I told him simply as I got to walking again, looking down at my clipboard as though reviewing my notes on him, specifically.

Fortunately, he took this in stride: I heard him laugh jubilantly, and I let my own smile grow at the sound. "Wow! Thanks, captain!"

I smiled as I walked away, shaking my head. I only lifted my eyes from my notes when I realized I was about to walk into someone, and I sidestepped just in time only to realize who it was. "Hello, Mike," I said in greeting. "Lots of good talent in this group, isn't there?"

He nodded his affirmative. "They're working hard today."

"Have you solidified who is joining your squad?"

"I have. Would you like to see?"

"I would," I said, appreciating that for as simply he spoke, he was strong and dependable and incredibly kind, too. He lowered his notes so that I could see, and among many other names, I smiled at a certain pair: Nanaba and Gelgar. Gelgar, anyway, we were standing a few yards from, and I gestured with a nod of my head towards him. "You'll have your hands full with that one."

"I know," he replied. "Still, he makes a fine soldier."

"So does anyone you lead," I reminded him, smiling up at the much taller man. "You seem to have that effect on people."

"We're all excited to see how you do," Mike said, and I could tell that he was being honest, which made me feel a bit bashful, to be honest. Here was a soldier even stronger than me telling me that he was excited to see how I lead... Mike allowed a small smile to grace his face, and I imprinted the sight into my memory.

"Thank you," I said. "I'm excited to start."

"If you need help," he said earnestly, "don't hesitate to ask."

I nodded at him with a smile, and with a cordial one from him in return, we parted ways. What I said hadn't been a lie; I was excited. That's why I couldn't wait for dinner tonight, when we would break the news.

—

When all the dishes from the evening meal had been cleared away, lieutenants and aides alike started to go around, handing out the new assignments. They were stated on plain pieces of paper folded within envelopes, and that was all. Only the higher-ups got the specialized patches with their assignment, but the soldiers cared little about that: they only cared about their placement.

For many soldiers, their captain or their squad leader would remain the same. But for these new recruits, and for those coveting for those higher positions, they opened the envelopes with vigor once the order was given and...

I looked at Levi, a sly smile reaching my lips and I mouthed to him a simple, "Get ready", in anticipation for the cacophony of noise that was sure to come, as it did every year. This year was just all the more exciting, because for this yearly shuffle, we got to be part of the excitement.

I sat up a little straighter, trying to pick out any of the four that were joining us. The first one I picked out was Eld, who was sitting only a few tables away and was just across from Gunther. From this angle, I could just pick out the worried way he was gnawing on his bottom lip as he sliced through the envelope and slid the piece of paper out.

Seeing the way his jaw dropped, I nearly laughed. He sat up straight as a rod, trying to keep it together before a wide smile broke out onto his face. Just as Gunther presented his paper to Eld, Eld did the same and only a second later, they bumped their fists together, clearly excited, and they got to talking.

"I think they're excited," I said, leaning close to Levi so that he would hear me over all the noise.

"Is that so?" He did what he could to seem uninterested, but he was looking around all the same, his eyes following my gaze to find the pair I'd been watching. "Good, then."

Erwin stood. "Attention!" When all was quiet, and every pair of eyes was aimed his way, he continued. He spoke briefly to them on the matters of appealing their position if they deemed it necessary, and certain shifting regulations and such, but at last he said, "You will report to your Commanding Officers in the morning. Until then, get some rest. Dismissed!"

Among all the other soldiers leaving, I stuck close to Levi's side, and all too soon, we left the herd of excited soldiers as we ascended to the second floor, then to the third. It was much quieter up here, and only then did I allow myself to step away from Levi, and only when I reached my office - with Levi following me inside - did one of us speak.

"We'll need to pick aides," I said to him, crossing the space to reach my desk.

"An aide, you mean," he told me. Confused, I looked up from the desk, finding him leaning back against the door. "Only one."

"Hm? We have to share?"

"What? Think you need your own?"

"We get our own paperwork," I reasoned. "What's one poor aide to do? All our bidding?"

"I suppose not."

"I assume you've already got someone in mind," I mused, lowering myself to sit in my chair. I leveled an easy, even look at him while gathering a page of documents into my hands to look through. "Petra?"

"That's right."

I nodded slowly, taking his words in. I read over the documents ready to be signed, or at least, I tried to, but... I could feel a distinct pinch form in my brow as I instead looked at one of the half-written drafts of a report I had started this afternoon, but found I couldn't focus on that, either.

What the hell was this weird... feeling? The first thought that came to mind was jealousy, but that couldn't be it, could it? Why the hell would I be jealous of who he chose to be his aid? Because Petra would be - other than myself - the only other girl in the squad? Was it because she was cute?

But no, because... Levi loved me. There was no denying that. Was there? I tended to be the one to initiate any sort of affectionate phrasing or contact, but it was like that underground, too, and he'd told me outright that he loved me. Was he still so awkward that he wouldn't attempt it for fear or making a fool of himself, or was it something else?

It couldn't be. But it could. Petra was sweet, she was. But... So was I, surely? Maybe this was jealousy. I'd never felt anything like this before. And all for who would be his aid? Goodness, what was happening to me?

I didn't realize he crossed the room until he was at my side. "Doing more paperwork?" I didn't answer. I was too busy overthinking. "I'll go make tea." I stood up, lowering the documents I had gathered back to the desk. "Amaya?"

"I'm turning in early," I said quietly. I needed space to think. It wasn't fair to think this way, and it wasn't fair to potentially take it out on Levi that I was. So, if I went to bed, then-

"So early? Are you sick?"

"No," I answered simply. "Just tired."

I crossed the room and reached my bedroom. I opened the door just enough to slip inside, but hesitated to pass through when I heard Levi speak. "You're not even trying to drag me into bed with you," he noted.

If there was a snarky comment to follow, I didn't wait around to hear it. I spoke, instead. "You wouldn't come to bed, anyway." Then, quieter: "You never do."

I stepped into my room and shut the door behind me. I changed quickly, did all my business, then clambered into bed on the side that Levi ensured I was on whenever... er, in the few instances he came to bed at all.

Even this... it was so simple, wasn't it? And it was so stupid, too, so trivial. It shouldn't matter. He didn't sleep, so why come to bed? Perhaps so we might have this precious time to hold each other? Perhaps so that he might work through what was plaguing him and allow me to, for a moment, grant him the peace of a good night's rest?

Perhaps so we might... I don't know.

I just don't know.

This wasn't just jealousy, it was a retrospection on months of not being as close as maybe I'd like to be. His needs should always, of course, be his own priority, and they were. But so too were my own, and... Was this selfish? If he had insomnia, there was no point dragging him to bed, but when he was also against something as simple as holding hands while walking the hallways if anyone else was around...

It went beyond professionalism, didn't it? He was shy, perhaps... perhaps ashamed. Perhaps afraid to be seen and maybe ridiculed, made fun of, talked to about professionalism...

Curled up in bed, I was facing away from the door, but I was not so lost in my thoughts that I did not hear the door open, did not hear Levi step into the room. I did hear these things, and I also heard him pull his boots off and lay them one at a time on the floor by the foot of the bed, and then the rustle of fabric, of leather shifting. Whatever I had been expecting, it wasn't for Levi to join me in bed, but he did.

He pulled the covers back on the side he claimed and eased himself onto the mattress. He slid close, so close so that I could feel the warmth of his chest just behind me, but if he reached out as though to touch me, he hesitated.

"Amaya," he said quietly, and I opened my eyes, though I did not look over my shoulder to look up at him. I only stared at our shadows dancing along the wall ahead of me, the result of him leaving the bedroom door open and allowing the candlelight to stream in. "What's wrong?" I opened my mouth to speak, but he cut in before I could get a single word out. "Don't say nothing is wrong. I know something is bothering you. You'd never miss evening tea otherwise."

I nearly scoffed, but held it back. In place of that, I said, "It's about the only thing we do together, anyway."

"What?" It was clear he hadn't heard me, or perhaps he just wanted me to clarify, but I rolled my bottom lip between my teeth. "What do you mean, Amaya?"

I rolled back towards him slightly so as to be able to turn my head to see him better. But my shoulder brushed against his chest with the way he was propped up on one elbow, and if I were to stay here, it would mean leaning against him. I hadn't realized how close he was, but when I made to lean away, he set a hand on my waist, keeping me here.

"Levi," I said quietly, wondering if this was the next best step to take. "You still love me, don't you?"

He seemed taken aback by my question, and I realized it was an odd one to ask. At long last, he said, "I do. What makes you think I don't?"

"We don't... Well, I don't think we..." I huffed. "I know that you're a... particular sort of man, one who's gone through so much, and I know there is a lot you're not comfortable with, especially regarding public affection and the like, but I can't help feeling like that sometimes..."

"Like I don't feel the way I tell you I do?"

"It's just that we don't do a lot together, Levi," I said. "I enjoy the time we spend together. I'm not stupid, I know why you spend more time in my office in just one day than you've ever spent in your own. But aside from that, there's a lot I feel like we don't do."

"There are rules against fraternization, Amaya," he said evenly. "We can't do a lot in the public eye."

"But that's not what I'm talking about," I argued. "I'm talking about this, about how I miss the nights we spent together in your room underground, but now you spend your nights in your chair and you don't... God, this is so stupid, but you don't even kiss me goodnight, and I know you value actions over words, and I also know that showing affection is difficult for you. I knew that well before I fell in love with you. But sometimes I feel like your actions don't quite..."

"You don't feel..." He trailed off, looking away for a moment, clearly considering my words closely. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was making you feel that way."

"I know it's hard for you," I said softly, "and I wouldn't ever want to push you to do something you're not ready for or don't like. I only wanted you to know how I feel, and if it's something as simple as being nervous, just know that I'll take it as slowly as you need."

"You wanted me to know how you feel," he said slowly, his eyes of ethereal blue seeming to pierce right through me, "and yet you went to bed without telling me."

"I was upset," I admitted, "about something else. It's stupid, though."

"Just say it."

"When you said Petra would be your aide," I said quietly, not quite wanting to say it. "I got a little jealous."

One of his eyebrows arched upwards. "Are you an idiot?"

It made me smile, it did, and he shook his head with disbelief and a bit of fondness, too. "Maybe. I told you it was stupid. It's why I came to bed, I didn't want to take it out on you or something."

"We're commanding the same unit at my insistence," he reminded me quietly. "It's... only ever been you. If I haven't been doing enough... You should've told me sooner. I wasn't sure what you were comfortable with."

"I want to do so much with you," I told him. "I want to hold you close, to hug you and kiss you and a million other things. If not in the hallways or anything like that, but in here, where it's just us. I never push because I know you."

"Those million other things," he said, distinctly more bashful now than he was, and of all things, I was surprised that he picked that out of all that I had said. "Does that include..."

"Include...?"

"You know what I mean."

"I don't. You could mean so many things."

"Amaya, don't play stupid."

"I'm not," I insisted. "Just say it." I reached up and slowly, and oh so gently, placed my palm against his cheek to guide him to look at me. He'd stubbornly looked away as he grew more and more embarrassed, and though I had a feeling I knew what he was referring to, I would have no way to know for sure unless he said it outright. "When it's just us," I reminded him gently, "there's no judgment. You know that."

He debated internally for a silent moment more before stating rather quickly, rather quietly: "Intercourse."

I'd have smiled, for he seemed to flustered by even the mere thought, but I held it back, for doing so would make him withdraw away and regret saying it, and I didn't want that. "It does," I answered for him, finally. "But again, I'd never ask you to do anything you don't want to, and not before you're ready."

"I'm not..." He swallowed hard, his eyes finally finding mine. "I'm not against being intimate," he said, "not if it's with you. But I've never..."

"Neither have I," I said to him, hoping it might reassure him. "I didn't want to do it with anyone other than someone I loved with all my heart."

"I never thought I would," he said to me, and I realized with a start that he was indulging something terribly personal with me, and that in and of itself took so much courage for him to do. And for him to say it to me, of all people... I lowered my hand from his cheek, and he adjusted slightly to be more comfortable, propped up on his elbow as he was. "My mother was a prostitute."

"Is that why you didn't like that part of the city?" He nodded. "You grew up there, didn't you?" He nodded once more. "And... you said you were in the room when she died. Was she sick?"

"I don't know," he answered. "I never knew for sure. It could have been starvation, she was so thin. It happened over time, I think, so it could have been anything."

"I'm so sorry," I said earnestly to him. "I can't imagine how difficult that must have been. But look at you now, Levi. She must have loved you so much. I knew quite a few women who didn't keep their kids so that they could keep working."

"Yeah," he said through a sigh. "I met women like that, too."

"All of what you've gone through," I said softly, "makes you who you are. I never knew the true extent, and I will never understand completely what you've gone through, but I know that I love you for the man you are. If all of this means it might take a little while longer for you to be ready, or if you're never ready, I'll love you all the same, intimacy or not."

"And I love you," he replied in a whisper, lowering himself to me so he could place a reverent kiss on my forehead. "I'm sorry I haven't made you feel that way lately. I want to do... things like that with you, but I don't know how."

At that, I finally allowed my smile to show. "What, you don't know how to kiss me properly?"

"Shut up," he mumbled, letting me set my hand against his cheek again and guide him to me. The kiss we shared was simple, only a peck, and yet it sealed in place these words we spoke to each other.

"To be clear," I said against his lips when we broke away, "I never really doubted your love for me. I just felt... insecure, I suppose."

"Because of a nineteen year old."

"You-!" He chuckled as I slapped him on the arm, not nearly enough to hurt him and only enough to prove my point. "You're such an asshole."

"I'm still not tired," he said, deciding for now not to dignify my words with a response, "but unless candlelight will bother you, I can move in here."

"It won't bother me," I told him. At that, he started to move, but before he made too much space between us, I rolled over and caught his arm in mine. "Are you going to stay in the uniform?"

"I was," he said. "Why?"

My smile turned coy, and somewhat sheepish. "It's kinda uncomfortable to lay against," I said.

A confused knit found his brow. "The hell are you going to do? Lie on top of me?"

"Well, no," I said, laughing a little. "Just go, and hurry back. We'll make it work somehow."

He shook his head and got off the bed, then left the room. Only moments later he returned, a stack of paperwork set atop a hardcover book tucked under one arm and a candle in the other. He set the candle on the nightstand on his side of the bed and clambered back in, sitting with his back to the wall and stretching his legs out in front of him. As soon as he was settled, or perhaps even before he was, I was there, setting my head against his thigh and making myself comfortable.

While I did send him a cheeky smile, Levi only shook his head once more, a certain level of fondness in his gaze and gentle affection in the way he pulled the blanket up to cover my shoulders that had slipped from it with my movements.

As I slowly drifted off to sleep, he worked diligently with the paperwork set on his other thigh. Every so often, he'd have to read a longer passage, and his free hand would wind its way into my hair, running through the strands or gently massaging my scalp. Other times, his hand would come to rest against my shoulder or my back, a comforting weight against me that helped lull me to sleep.

And that next morning, we left the room and went proudly after breakfast to the training grounds to greet, for the very first time, the Special Operations Squad. Our subordinates.

—

Weeks Later:

I leaned back in my chair and rubbed my eyes with the heels of my hands. Even though we'd only just gotten our own squad after finally deeming these four soldiers worth it, was it too late to go back to being a regular soldier?

Before, I never had to draft evaluations, track finances, request supplies for training, keep careful count of gas use for each of my soldiers as well as maintenance reports. But now I had to do it all and more, in addition to all the regular training.

It was a lot.

At the very least, I could say that I had a good aide.

"Tired, captain?"

"Mm-hm," I hummed, lowering my hands from my face.

Eld chuckled good-naturedly, then set his pen down. "I can take over writing that, if you want."

"No, no," I said, stifling a yawn behind my hand. "Goodness. I used to take naps outside after training. Now I don't have the time to." I gestured to the report I was writing. "It's all so much, but it's nothing at all at the same time. It's awful."

Eld shrugged a little, returning his eyes to the financial records he was looking over and cross-referencing, just to ensure we were still under our given budget. As a squad, we could order specialized items. We didn't do it too often, and the person that I knew abused it the most was Hange, who did all her research and bought all the equipment and supplies with her budget... and routinely went over it, and would ask us to buy things for her (which we rarely ever did).

I'd written it, he needed only to review it. I was just having a much harder time focusing than he was. I pushed away from the desk, finally having had enough. Eld watched curiously as I walked around the desk. I slowed once I passed his chair and realized he wasn't following after me; he likely thought I was simply going off to make tea, as I so often did. No, this was just one of the rare few afternoons in which Levi was in his own office. But I was bored, so there was nothing else better to do than go bother him, right?

"Come on, Eld," I said. "Let's go bother my co-captain."

"Sure thing," he said, standing and falling into step with me.

Eld was very quickly shaping into not only an excellent aide to me, but a wonderful friend as well. Since he joined the squad, he proved himself to be the soldier I had observed him to be; dedicated, strong, skillful. But he also proved himself to be a good person, too: kind, helpful, selfless.

If I picked anyone to help me with paperwork, I was glad it was him. We were diligent and good, hard-working revisers and writers when we needed to be, but when I would make tea for us, we would have regular conversations and he really was an interesting person.

All in all, he let me know in little ways each day that I had made the right decision in who to make my aide.

We made the short walk to Levi's office - with it being only next door, of course - and I knocked on the door with my free hand, a packet of documents and my pen tucked under one arm. Through the door, I heard Levi's voice start to say: "State your name and-"

"Is that Amaya?" That was Hange's voice, and I smiled. "I think it's Amaya! If that's you, come on in!"

It seemed I wasn't the only bored higher-up in HQ, today. After sharing a sly smile with Eld, I opened the door and in we went. Eld closed the door behind us, and I crossed the space quickly, reaching Levi's side on the other side of his desk quickly. While Hange was busy greeting Eld, and Eld was busy replying and settling into the chair across from where I'd set a chair next to Levi, I leaned down and pressed a kiss to Levi's cheek, one that was light and quiet, and I pulled away before anyone could clue into what I had done.

I sat down in the chair I claimed and finally greeted Hange. I was greeted with more enthusiasm than I could ever hope to muster into my own voice, and I laughed gently at their excitement. Hange was seated on the small couch set to one wall, a small, cushioned seat that wasn't too comfortable but it was better than nothing and it offered a good spot to sit and read, situated underneath one of the large windows as it was.

He only brought it in here after I made a comment one day about wanting to sit and read in the office in the sun, and I'm fairly certain he stole it from the small library here. Hange had a notepad in hand, and from here I could see that the page she was on was absolutely littered in notes and drawings.

Levi was doing what he could to keep his attention on his paperwork, but I think there were currently far too many distractions in here for that to happen.

"What're you working on there, Squad Leader?" Eld asked Hange, and I thanked him silently, even though he'd done it inadvertently. What he'd done was give me a chance to speak with Levi without it being the focus of the room.

"Are you alright, Levi?" The sidelong look he sent me spoke volumes, and I knew what he was trying to tell me. He wanted me to step in and save him. I winked at him then turned to Hange.

"So I've found a way for us to safely restrain Titans, if Erwin would ever give me the go-ahead," Hange was saying to Eld, proudly presenting their design. From here it looked like a mess, but I'm sure it made some sense to their own eyes, if no one else's. "It'll allow us to observe them closely and in a way previously impossible! I only wish it'd allow for free movement on the Titans' part, but for now, this is likely the only way I'll be able to get Erwin's approval, but-"

"Speaking of Erwin," I cut in, getting Hange's attention, "he was asking for you earlier. I forgot to mention it, but I'm sure it's urgent enough for you to go now."

"Did he mention what it was about?"

"Not to me," I said, shaking my head. "But it is Erwin, so it's probably important. Perhaps it's about your progress on that... idea of yours."

"Ooh, maybe," Hange said, excitement reaching their big, brown eyes. "Alright, I'll go now! Thanks, Amaya!" When Hange stood, they paused. "Oh, are we still on for research later?"

"Of course," I said. "I'll be there."

"Sweet," Hange said happily, then dropped their voice to a conspiratorial whisper: "Moblit is a great assistant, but he gets rather boring. Perhaps I should have picked another aide..."

"Moblit would go all the way to Sina for a pen if you'd ask him to," I said, setting my chin on my hand. "You appreciate him, really."

"Yeah, I do," Hange agreed. "Well, I'm off. See ya!"

When Hange left the room, all of us seemed to let out a collective breath of relief. "One headache down," Levi muttered quietly. Eld got to work silently, and I was about to, if not for a knock on the door. "Name and business," Levi called out.

"Petra Ral, sir," came a familiar voice. "Here with a copy of those reports you asked for."

"Enter."

She did, and she outright beamed upon catching my eye in the room, and I responded in kind. "Hello, Petra," I said happily. "Is he working you too hard?"

"Not at all, Captain," she said, laughing a little and closing the door behind her. She approached the desk and handed the stack of paperwork to Levi, who in turn handed her a new one.

"I expect these to be done for tomorrow before dinner," he said, and she nodded.

"Yes, sir." She said a quiet hello to Eld, and requested permission to start on the reports here, which was granted.

And as they worked next to each other, Eld and Petra talked quietly, the kind of talk that was awkward, the kind that came with knowing you had to work with someone closely who you didn't really know well, and know that you just needed to bridge the gap or take the first step in creating a relationship, so to speak.

Still, them talking - once more, a favor Eld did unknowingly - granted me another chance to speak with Levi. With an elbow on the desk and my cheek in one palm, I turned my head to look at him, and he met my eyes right away. "Are you alright? You seem tired."

"I'm fine," he replied, and right away, I felt he was lying. One of my eyebrows arched upwards, and his gaze followed the movement before meeting my eyes once more.

Only after ensuring they were still chatting away, I continued. "You're exhausted. I can tell. It's worse now, isn't it?" He knew what I meant without having me need to say it: I meant, of course, his insomnia.

His mind did not allow him time to rest. His mind was always working, always alive, always awake. After so much loss... it'd been easier underground. But here, when losing comrades was so common, when we'd seen the horrors that even the surface had to offer in an extremely personal way...

After 845, it got even worse. Seeing people on the surface starve, get killed in the name of preservation for the many, seeing people who were doctors, teachers, parents, resort to thieving to ensure their families could eat... Refugees forced into camps where they felt trapped with no hope...

The surface was looking more and more like the Underground City with each passing day. It's what made our work important, yes, but on the other side... It was hard to rest when everything could be lost tomorrow.

I, at least, found solace in knowing I was alive, and so was Levi, and so were those around me. It could all change in a moment, I knew that, but being grateful for that much was all that I could do to ensure rest.

But Levi...

"Drop it," he muttered, looking towards his paperwork.

"I'm allowed to care," I told him sternly. "Have you not been sleeping at all? Not even napping?" His only response was the lack of one, and even that was extremely telling. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"It doesn't matter," he said. "I get my rest."

"Your eyebags have eyebags," I said gently. "If you'd have told me, I would have taken over for training." I sighed. "What if those special Titans return and we're called into action? I'm not letting you die on me, Levi. Why don't we, in a bit, go take a nap, or at least try?"

"Only once we get more work done," he conceded, knowing I wasn't going to give in.

"Good," I said, stretching my arms above my head and leaning back in the seat. I felt each of my shoulders crack and that was when I released them, sitting up straight as I did and gathering my work into my hands. "Can't have Humanity's Strongest getting burnt out, now can I?"

"Huh?"

I looked at Levi again, confused by his confusion. "You haven't heard?"

"Heard what?"

"When I went to the shops the other day with Mike to run errands," I started to say, "I heard some rumors. Mike smelled them from a mile away, I think." Eld let out a laugh at my joke, but I continued on. "People have been talking, and they've heard of Levi, recently promoted to a captain, who is as strong as an entire battalion. They're calling you Humanity's Strongest Soldier, Levi."

Levi clicked his tongue and stubbornly looked down at his paperwork. "That's ridiculous."

"And that's not even all," Petra cut in. "Sorry to interrupt, Captain Amaya. But there's more to the rumors."

"What," I said, all the intonations of an incoming joke playing on my tongue, "is he Humanity's Grumpiest, too?"

In response to my inane teasing, and at his expense no less, Levi kicked my shin - hard.

To keep from letting loose a string of expletives, I bit down on my tongue - hard.

"Oh, I've heard the rumors Petra is talking about, I think," Eld piped up. "They involve you, captain."

Huh? He was looking right at me. There were rumors about me? Oh, no.

"They do say that Levi is Humanity's Strongest," Eld said. "But you just so happen to be Humanity's Strongest Woman."

"I've heard that one," Petra agreed. "And I got to say that I train under her!" I smiled almost bashfully at that; she was too sweet, truly. "But," she continued excitedly, "there's more! They call Captain Levi our White Wing."

"White Wing," I repeated. "What?"

"Referring to our emblem, the Wings of Freedom," she explained, and I looked at Levi, surprised. That was certainly an honor, to be regarded as such - as one of the very wings that allowed humanity to fly, to fight for freedom. "And you, Captain Amaya... you're our Blue Wing."

"Really?" I asked, nearly breathlessly, my eyes snapping back towards Petra. Goodness, I felt all but winded at such an honor. Did I really deserve that? Strongest woman or not, to be thought of as Levi's equal, as the sole other soldier who helped humanity fly...

"Mm-hm," she hummed in confirmation, a bright smile on her face.

"I like the sound of it," I admitted, laughing a little. I slumped back against the chair, looking over at Levi. He seemed similarly surprised, but he seemed to be holding himself together far better than I was. "Blue Wing, huh? And you're the White Wing..."

"How about that?" Eld asked, a prideful sort of smile on his lips. "That's incredible."

"The rumors go further," Petra said.

"Keep going and I'll start to think you're making it all up," I said, playfully narrowing my eyes at her.

She giggled and shook her head. "Captain Levi sends me to town often for tea leaves," she said. "I get all the gossip while I'm there."

"Seems like an abuse of power to me," I said, sending a look towards Levi.

"Even my family writes to me," she went on to say. "My father asks a lot of questions and often shares what he hears, asking if it's true. It's really cute. According to him, people are starting to see you two as symbols. You're the Wings of Freedom, but only together. No one knew who you were until you took the scouts by storm, and you were in the Vanguard, and now Captains... People are sure that with you two on our side, we'll all eventually be free of the threat of Titans."

"Sounds to me like you give people hope," Eld said, smiling towards me.

"How do they even know?" I asked. "It's not like what we do is made public."

"The scouts talk," Petra said, looking to Eld for confirmation, who nodded. "All of us do."

"First thing I did after learning I was joining the Special Operations Squad was write to my family," Eld admitted. "I wrote about how happy I was to be working under such talented soldiers. So, we talk, then our families talk, and..."

"Wow," I said, at a loss of what else to say. "Just... I don't know. I'm honored."

It was strange to think that when we donned the uniform and bore the Wings of Freedom on our back... people looked to us with hope, with pride... with the belief that we might help free them.

Setting the thought aside for now was difficult, but for the next hour or so, we worked in relative quiet. When at last we dismissed our aides, I leaned over, setting my cheek on Levi's shoulder. My eyes drifted closed and a content smile reached my lips as I thought about what Petra and Eld had said... about what we represented to the people.

For all the hardship they were going through... they looked to us for hope. That meant something to me. I would make the most of it, and make them proud - and continue to make the soldiers we led proud as well.

"Everything alright, brat?"

"Yeah," I said honestly. "I'm glad we're here."

I wasn't expecting Levi to reply, so I nearly missed it when he did, quiet as he was. "So am I."

"We're fighting for so many people... not just ourselves. Never would I have guessed that I'd be here, doing this... and to be seen as a symbol of hope, of all things."

"It's certainly not where I thought I would be," he said. He turned his head and, so gently, pressed a kiss to my hair. "We've come a long way from being high-rollers in the black market."

"That we have," I agreed. I ran my hand along his arm, following it until I found his hand. I linked my fingers with his, and when his fingers curled around mine, I let myself lean against him a little more, getting comfortable. "I'm proud of how far we've come. I don't know what's in store for us in the future, but I'm excited to see where it takes us."

He thought for a moment before replying. "Me too."

We sat there for a while longer, watching the shadows stretch across the room as the sun set. When at last we disentangled from each other and stood, it was not for long. We went downstairs to make a pot of tea, then returned to his office to indulge in it, settling down onto his couch to drink quietly and look out the window.

When the sun dipped below the wall, we still did not quite find it in us to nap. Rather, we went to the mess hall for dinner when the bells rang out, then went to the roof, wasting the hours away. He let me prattle on and on about nothing at all, until finally I dozed off, my head in his lap.

I wouldn't realize until I woke up, but he picked me up and carried me downstairs and into my office. I wouldn't realize until I woke up, but he got into bed with me and for the first time in a long time... managed to sleep for more than a few precious hours during the night.

And I wouldn't realize until I woke up, but even when he woke up, he stayed there in bed with me, his arms securely around me, keeping me close and allowing his heartbeat to be my lullaby.