By the time Farlan stepped through the threshold into the house, it was late. It was far into the night, not that it was easy to tell down here, but his internal clock was telling him to get to bed already.

Oh, but it seemed there was an interrogation to be had.

As Farlan shrugged off his coat, he locked eyes with the man who had obviously been waiting for his arrival.

"Levi," Farlan greeted. "You're up late."

"You were out late."

"What, are you my mother? I'm a big boy, I can handle myself."

"Tch," Levi clicked his tongue, clearly irritated - only, there was a glimmer of amusement in his eyes, and so Farlan smiled as he pulled his shoes off one by one and set them by the door after hanging his jacket up. "It wasn't you I was worried about."

"Hm? So what, then?"

"The gear. It took us a lot to steal that set. Any longer and I'd have set out to pry it off your dead body if I had to."

Farlan didn't have it in himself to say anything more about it, so he only chuckled and shook his head rather indulgently. He crossed the room with slow, measured strides, then lowered himself into the seat across from his partner.

"Alright," he said as he stretched his feet out before him. "Ask away. I know you're curious."

"I don't need to know what run-down bar you decided to get shit-faced in."

"I'm perfectly sober!"

One of Levi's eyebrows arched upwards, showing that he didn't believe even an ounce of what he said. Dammit, weren't they partners? Comrades, colleagues? Weren't relationships like these supposed to be built on trust?

"You certainly look pleased with yourself, at any rate."

"Well, I am," Farlan said, straightening up in his seat, hoping Levi would be baited into asking.

...He wasn't.

Whatever, Farlan knew he'd listen, so he started talking.

"I was just with Amaya."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"I was with Amaya."

"Who?"

"She's the-" Farlan cut himself off with a huff and slumped back against the chair. "She's the woman we watch sing."

"Ok. And?"

"I was trying to convince her to join us."

At that, Levi leveled an even look with him, one that very well was asking what the hell was wrong with him. "Why?"

"Because I see potential in her."

"As an asset?"

"No," Farlan said. "If I wanted that, I'd have said so. Would she be a good one to have? Sure. But there's more to her than that."

"There's more to Yan and the others too, I'm sure."

"Right," Farlan agreed, "but she's a damn good fighter. Don't you get it, Levi? The thorn in our side was her and her alone. She's been behind everything that's gotten in our way the past few months."

"I know that."

"And doesn't it intrigue you a little bit?"

"Thieves are as common as rats down here," Levi said, and Farlan sighed.

"She knows we know about her, Levi."

"How?"

"I told her."

"Why in the hell would you do that?"

"Because I want her to join us."

"And if I don't want that?"

"Oh, come on. She said something the other day about it being the time for the MP's to have a change of the guard, so I'd be alright walking around for a while longer with the gear. Interesting, isn't it? She knows their schedules."

"Anyone with eyes can be a keen observer of that sort of thing," Levi argued.

"But you never did."

"Because I..." Levi trailed off, glancing away with an irritated pinch in his brow, and Farlan smiled.

"Just admit you see something in her, too."

"That damned brat? Absolutely not. She threw a stick at me."

"And you let her."

"I knew she wouldn't hit me."

"That's no excuse and you know it."

"I'm not convinced."

"Oh, I don't know," Farlan said, standing from his seat. He gazed down at Levi, a cheeky little smile on his face - one Levi didn't trust, and perhaps was right to. "You'll change your mind about her. She'll make sure of that."

Tch, Levi had thought. Fat chance.

—

The battle was over.

It was final, now. They'd won. They'd won at a great cost, yes, with many lives lost - far too many. But they could at the very least say it now, and say it surely, and they could take one great, big collective deep breath. It was over.

Levi had caught a glimpse of Hange and Erwin in Paths almost immediately following the battle. And not only them, but everyone. Mike, Nanaba, Gelgar, his old squad. Everyone had been there.

His heart had felt odd then, and it remained even now; odd, yes, but warm, because he saw those that he'd lost and getting one final glimpse at them had been... nice.

To know that they were watching, that they would be waiting for him once he eventually passed. But there was a hollow sort of emptiness too, knowing that the battle was over now. There was no more fighting to be had. Right? He was safe. They all were. He wouldn't need to go to battle ever again.

He was still trying to come to terms with it. He was Levi, who was Humanity's Strongest for his fighting prowess, raw strength, impeccable reflexes, tactfulness, and ease of skill. He was a fighter - always had been. But without that...

Thinking back... something had beckoned to him, tugging him closer, asking him to join those fallen comrades of his. It was an enticing thought, to rest at long last. Eternal rest - surely he had done enough?

And yet... there was resistance, too. They were pushing him away. It wasn't his time yet. It was too soon for him to die.

Not only that, but he had resisted. Enticing though it was, it was not his time to die. He did not come all this way just to die. Wasn't it about time he lived for himself? He certainly thought so, and besides, he had two very important people waiting for him.

His brow furrowed as someone took a look at his injured leg, the two brats watching from a few feet away. His brow furrowed, because a thought occurred to him. Had everyone been there...?

Hange and Erwin had been there. Mike, Nanaba... He went through his mental checklist, going through who he'd lost over his years in the scouts and even far before he'd worn the wings. As far as he could tell, they were all accounted for. He relished being able to see them, but... where was Amaya?

If Paths was where those of Ymir's blood returned when they died, and Amaya wasn't here, then... that meant... Amaya was alive. His wife was alive. She'd been captured and fought her hardest and whatever else had happened to her today but... she was alive.

His eyes widened. The people treating his injury told him to settle down and he did, but his heart refused to slow.

He had to get home.

—

I fell asleep that night quicker than I thought I would.

But as quickly as the sleep came to me, it wasn't to last, nor was it productive sleep. Not that I could help that. It wasn't that I couldn't get to sleep. No, it seemed that as soon as my head met the pillow, it found me.

I didn't have to fight to get comfortable, take a walk to soothe my mind, nothing. And that surprised me. I thought that maybe I'd be able to get good rest. Surely I deserved it, right? But it didn't matter, because it wasn't a good rest.

My dreams that night were riddled with my fears, laced with my memories. This sleep would be restless. I knew that for certain. But still... It was better than being awake.

—

"I'm also worried about us," I said. "As a family. Wars are tough. I just hope we all make it out alright."

"We will," he said. "I know we will."

"I wish I had your confidence," I said sadly. "But if you believe it, then it has to be true, right?"

"That's right," he chuckled. "Have I ever lied to you about anything like this?"

"No," I answered. "Though I'd like to think that you've never lied to me, ever." I smiled at him, then lifted my hands from his back only to set them on his cheeks. "Now come here, love. I was bratty and didn't give you a goodnight kiss, right?"

"Mm-hm," he hummed. "Maybe that's why you couldn't sleep."

"Maybe," I murmured. He propped himself up on his elbows that he lowered to either side of my shoulders so he could pull himself closer. Our lips met, gently and lovingly, and Irealized how much I'd missed it today. When he pulled away, he lowered his forehead to rest against mine.

"You know you don't have to worry about me, right?"

"I know," I said. "I just can't help it."

A quiet chuckle escaped him. "You damn woman."

And with that he leaned in to kiss me again. One of his hands drifted down my side and tucked under the small of my back, a silent request to arch into him, which I did. He slipped his arm under me, only to pull me with him as we rolled over. This was a late-night make-out session, through and through, but there was a different meaning behind it tonight.

Apologies passed between our lips, loving words dancing on our tongues. I could feel the regret on his teeth and I'm sure he could feel it on my own. Love was pouring out of him and I drank it all in. This was assurance, this was repentance, this was love.

When at last we pulled away, breathless, he smiled up at me. "Sleepy now, brat?"

"I think so," I chimed. I pecked his lips again before sliding off him, cuddling against his side. He fixed the blankets over us, then pressed one last kiss to my temple. "Goodnight, darling."

"Goodnight, my love."

We settled in, but it was clear to anyone with eyes - and especially so to the man who knew me better than anyone else - that I was not any closer to falling asleep. I was fidgety, and couldn't quite get comfortable, not even when Levi maneuvered to his back and I cozied up next to him, a hand pressed to his chest and my head resting against his shoulder.

I just couldn't get comfortable. No, that wasn't right. I could get comfortable, because right now I was in my favorite spot to cuddle in, but the problem was that I couldn't stay comfortable.

"Maya," Levi breathed out, "if you're going to stay up, at least stop wiggling around."

"I can't," I said right away.

"Why?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "Just having a hard time falling asleep."

"Just try."

"I am."

"Try harder."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"It isn't working."

"Yeah. I can tell, you brat."

"I don't know why I'm so restless all of a sudden," I huffed, sitting up. The blanket pooled into my lap and Levi sighed, following my lead and sitting up as well.

"Did you have more to say?"

About the argument, he meant to finish with. "No," I told him. Truth was, there were so many things I could say, but I didn't want to rehash. Really, I didn't. Besides, I already had a plan in mind. I would find a way to join them on the raid. I swore it.

If I dared speak more now, I might accidentally give it away, and I definitely did not want to do that. Not at all.

"No," I repeated, more surely this time. "I don't." I looked at him, then. "What about you?"

He shook his head in response. "Maybe I'm just still fired up," I suggested. "Maybe if I find a way to expel some energy, I'll be able to sleep..."

"Uh oh," Levi muttered. "I don't like that look in your eyes. Whatever you're about to ask, don't-"

I leaned close to him, reaching out to take his hands into my own. "Dance with me sweetheart, won't you?"

"No, Maya."

"But-"

"No." Perhaps I let too much of my shock show on my face, because his features visibly softened and his shoulders slumped, giving in right away. "Why now? We can find something else, anything else to do."

"I like dancing with you," I said honestly. "It's a good way to use some energy and I'll still get to hold you close and you might not say it, but you like holding me at such awful hours of the night, too. So if we're up, we may as well do something that will benefit us both, right?" Alright, time to play it up. Time to reprise my role as the esteemed actress! "Besides," I said softly, glancing away, "when you leave for the raid, I'll be alone again."

"You'll have Emiko."

"True," I responded, "but I'll worry about you so much, and... and goddesses forbid if you get hurt or worse out there and I'm left waiting, just like before..."

Levi considered it for a long moment, one silent and almost stifling, before he released a quick puff of air through his nose. "Fine. We don't have music but don't expect me to sing. That was a one-time thing."

"I wouldn't dream of it," I said, excitedly leading him up and out of bed. On bare feet we took our spot on the floor, and I hurried to get into frame. When his arms were securely around me I smiled, then began to move. Though he was in a leading position, he certainly let me take the lead, and I was more than happy to do so.

In the moonlight we danced, and I inwardly remarked how true my words were, but not specifically on what I had said, but what I had deliberately left unsaid, the words meant for him to figure out - and he had.

If I were left without him, if he did in fact die...

Yes, I had Emi. Yes, I would raise her to the best of my ability.

But I would be horribly, terribly lost and alone without him.

If I were left with only memories, or if perhaps the opposite was true and only he was... shouldn't we have wonderful ones to remember? I did not want to remember the argument we just had. I wanted to remember us as we are now, adoring spouses, best friends, partners in life and love.

Soulmates, maybe.

So, in the moonlight we danced. Though hesitant at first, Levi soon came to hold me more securely against him, as though I might slip from his grasp. And maybe he feared I would. Hell, his nightmares had certainly shown him far worse than that.

I went willingly into his embrace, content in being held and in holding him. I can never be sure how long we danced there at the foot of our shared bed, but soon it seemed my delirium from exhaustion caught up with me, because with a giggle I escaped his arms and dashed away.

"Maya-!"

I left the bedroom, going quickly in my flight down the hall and to the living room. I turned to face him but stayed just out of grasp, and he reached for me, grabbing at my fingertips only for me to slip out of reach again and again.

"Dammit, Maya," Levi said, but I heard through his words loud and clear the laugh he tried so desperately to hide.

When I looked up at him and slowed slightly, he caught my gaze and - goodness, he did not dare hide his smile. He'd already been caught, so why bother? That must've been his thoughts exactly because he allowed himself to smile but not only that, he allowed himself to chuckle warmly and I let him catch up, tugging me back against his chest.

"You wanted to dance so bad, why the hell are you running away?"

"I don't know," I breathed out. I'd gotten caught just before the large, beautiful window of our living room, the one that let in so much natural light and this evening, it seemed we must have forgotten to close the curtains because they were tied open still, letting in the ghostly blue light of the hour.

To see him bathed in it, in that ethereal shade that his eyes were so naturally... To see him take a deep breath in from our short dash, and to see the incredulous but playful look in his eyes as he regarded me so, holding me just so to his chest, his body a warm line against my own....

To see the way his sharp, feline eyes would soften for me and only for me at this moment...

I was his wife. He chose me to have in his life, forever, for as long as I would have him. Sometimes it was still so hard to believe.

"What's that look for?"

I shook my head, not wanting to answer at first. But when I did, my words were quiet and truthful. "I don't want to lose you."

He adjusted his hold on me right away, setting one warm palm against the small of my back while the other rested now against my cheek, guiding me to keep looking at him. Not that I even thought of going anywhere, of course. But he was so warm, and his hold so soft, I couldn't help but lean into his touch.

He opened his mouth to speak, but decided against it, but only for a moment. When he did finally decide to speak, he leaned in close, his forehead coming to rest against my own softly, like a bird landing against its perch. It belonged here. We belonged together.

There was no other place for us to be. And with Emi... We just needed each other.

"Amaya, I'm about to say something stupid and sentimental," he warned, and I didn't dare look away from his eyes, no matter how intense the look in them was. "Don't you dare laugh. Got it?"

"Got it," I murmured.

"You will never lose me," he said surely. "Never. Even if I die, I know that..."

He trailed off, and I grew concerned. "Levi? What's wrong?" He stood up straight, and right away I missed his warmth and his closeness, and I desperately wanted to follow after him, but I didn't. I remained where I was. "Are you alright?"

His hand lowered from my cheek, finding my upper arm instead, his fingers ghosting across my skin with a light touch. "If I die," he began, his eyes searching mine for something I couldn't figure out, "somewhere along the line, will you..."

"Will I...?"

"Would you fall in love with someone else?"

"No," I answered right away. "No, never."

"You say that so surely," he muttered.

"You're my husband," I argued right away. "Before that, my best friend and the love of my life. Even if you die, I can't throw that away. I wouldn't be able to. No, you'll always be the love of my life, Levi. It's only ever been you, and it'll only ever be you."

He nodded, but didn't quite seem convinced yet.

"What we have can't be replicated," I told him. "I waited for so long to meet you. If by some awful chance you pass before me, I'll be able to wait to see you again. But that won't happen - you dying first, I mean. I promised to be there for you, always. And I meant it. If I'm not there for you in your final moments, then they're not your final moments."

Levi took my words in, then allowed himself once more to smile. It was rueful, almost. It wasn't regretful, not quite, but definitely melancholic.

"For the record," I said softly, holding his face in my hands, "you won't lose me, either. I don't care if I have to fight the entire world single-handedly."

"Good, then," he said quietly. "If they really wanted to stop you, they'd need to give you a bigger handicap."

"Exactly," I said, smiling now. His eyes lost some of that sadness, and his smile was true, and my heart was warm. "Whether in life or in death, you will always have me."

"And you'll always have me."

We sealed those words as we always did with a kiss - but this one was fleeting, it was quick, and it was only a single peck before he held me flush against him, ducking his face towards my neck. I held him just as close if not more so; and when he drew me closer, closer, closer, he eventually lifted me up. With all my weight in his arms, I was left with little else to do but cling to him tighter, and so that's exactly what I did.

With Levi holding me like this, I felt so small, so frail, so inconsequential. How could I save Eren and the world as only myself? How had it come to this? I was so small - how could my actions hold any weight? And yet, conversely, I felt so seen, so safe, and so loved. How could anything hurt me here, when he was holding me like this? How could I even think to worry for his life when he had come back to me time and time again? How silly was I to even think he would not return to me if he cared for me like this?

He held me there for a long, long time. So long, in fact, that I fell asleep. And he carried me there, set me down gently, and tucked me in before joining me on his side. I would never realize, not consciously, but that sleep had been so warm and so cozy, so safe and so restful, that I knew in my heart that he watched over me as he slept, pressing light kisses to my temple and holding me so close against him that the world could not find me here.

The world had not been kind to us.

But here, at least, it could not hurt us.

—

I knew I was awake only because I could feel the distinct soreness of my injuries. Soon, the medicine would wear off and I would feel the pain as it truly was. But I willed myself to fall back asleep, because that was such a lovely memory to remember and get to relive.

I only hoped I would not be disturbed again before morning.

—

"Mommy," Emi said, tugging on my dress. I looked down at her as I readied the teapot.

"Yes, love?" I asked with a smile, seeing how cute she was in her dress. We'd met with Reyes and his family this morning for breakfast at a cute little restaurant, so we'd gotten dressed up. Emiko had been so happy to put that dress on and had enjoyed receiving all the little compliments she'd gotten from his family.

She loved the attention, that was for sure. We were a pretty pair today, our dresses both sky blue. She'd worn a white undershirt underneath, but mine had sleeves so I hadn't needed to.

We just got home a few minutes ago, and I'd asked her if she wanted to change, but she didn't. "Can I go play outside, please?" Knowing immediately what my next words were going to be, she spoke up before I could. "I'll stay in the garden, I promise!"

"If that's the case, then of course you can," I said. "Go on ahead. I'll join you after I make some tea, okay?" I crouched down to her level, forcing my face into a serious countenance. "And if I catch you leaving the yard," I said, mock sternness in my voice, "your nose will be mine."

She giggled as I lightly pinched her nose between my thumb and forefinger. Knowing it was an empty threat in place of an actual punishment if she didn't do as told, she just let it happen, her little eyes scrunching up until I released her nose.

I rolled my eyes as she saluted me with the wrong hand. With a flurry of giggles she ran outside, only almost running into the back door this time on her way out. From my position by the sink I could see outside the large window and I watched as she picked up one of her outside toys and began to play with it. The garden was fenced in, but she knew how to open the gate. But there was still plenty of room for her to play without destroying the flowerbeds.

Or so I hoped.

Beyond the garden was a path leading to the horse pasture, where the charges were now. A quick glance at the calendar hung on the door to the pantry, and I realized it'd be time for visits to the vet soon for each of them. Maybe I'd have a house call done instead. It'd certainly be easier. And Strider, much like the dark mare, was growing lazier. She was certainly rubbing off on him. But still, I wanted to make sure the foal they'd had this season was healthy.

Emi had already claimed that horse as her own, so recently she'd taken to sneaking out the garden to go get a closer look despite my warnings. I'd had a serious talk with her the other night though after catching her doing it again, telling her that going to see the horses on her own could be dangerous, and I'd take her to see them... but only if she behaved.

That had seemed to work for now.

As I waited for the water to boil, I added the leaves to the pot. I let out a breath as I leaned my hip against the counter to wait. Thank goodness it was the weekend. I could already tell that I was going to sleep like a baby tonight. I wasn't exactly sure why I was so tired, today. It was only morning, but I could just tell that it was going to be a long, long day.

I huffed. When I felt like this, something big would happen. Always. It was just a nagging feeling in the back of my mind. Whether that something big was good or bad remained to be seen, but it was really only a matter of time before I found out.

There was a sudden brush against my leg, and I glanced down to smile at the cat. "Hello, lovely," I said to her as she leapt up onto the counter. She let out a little meow as I ran my hand along her back, her tail curling around my arm.

She still didn't have a real name, so I continued to call her lovely and pretty because she really was a pretty cat, so at the very least that part was truthful. She'd come back to the house for the first time just the other day, meowing up a storm by the front door, begging to be let in.

It seemed that she missed us. And we'd missed her too, certainly.

She was all black, wonderfully friendly, and endlessly loving. Still, she came and went as she pleased, because she really wasn't our cat and if she wanted to stay, she would. It was a welcome treat when she came around, spending a few nights at a time with us. She was a great little cuddler.

I was so focused on the cat that I almost missed it when there was a knock on the door. My head snapped up, my hand stilling on her back. She bumped my arm with her head as if to remind me that she was there, but at the sound of the knock my heart had leapt up into my throat.

"Expecting anybody today, lovely?" I kept my voice quiet because I sure as hell wasn't expecting anyone. I glanced out the window. Emiko was still playing outside happily. Engrossed in whatever she was doing, it'd take something big to pull her attention away.

There was another knock on the door. Three quick, hard knocks. Quickly, I lifted the pot of water away from the heat and turned it off. I lifted my dress skirt and removed my knife from the strap set on my good leg.

Reyes had told me he had a lot of errands to run today after we'd met for breakfast. And aside from him and his family, only my neighbors knew where I lived, but they weren't particularly fond of us Ackermans. Especially not with the way that Levi used to sneak into the garden and steal flowers from one of the families.

There was no way they were the ones visiting, unless it was to complain about something. Historia knew my address, but she had no reason to physically visit. Not with the new baby. Other than them, only the scouts... Oh, my god.

I wasn't taking any chances. I had no idea if they were even alive. I wanted to believe they were, but... This also could've easily been someone who'd caught wind of a mother living with her young daughter alone and had come to take advantage of that. It was only us here. The closest person I trusted to run to for help right now was easily a half-hour ride away. It was just us. I'd be damned if I let something happen to her while I was here. She was all I had left.

The cat leapt down from the counter and scurried off towards the office as I ducked into the hall. I pressed my back to the wall, hidden from view of the front door. I had such a bad fucking feeling about this.

Time seemed to slow down as the lock clicked undone. What the hell? Are they breaking in? Bold move: it's the middle of the day. The door slowly opened, the hinges creaking with protest at the movement. Time seemed to stand still as the door swung open. I stood as still as a statue as I waited for the intruder to make a move.

My heart was threatening to pound out of my chest with anticipation and fear. My fingers worked on their own, twirling the knife between them. If the jackass stepped into view, it'd be a simple move to throw the knife and get them in the head.

I only hoped Emi didn't come back inside before I'd cleaned the mess up. She'd thankfully not witnessed me killing somebody yet – honestly, I thought I was done with that now – and I really didn't want to change that.

But whoever this person was, they were certainly taking their time deciding what to do. A few times, I'd been the one intruding, back underground; others, we'd been broken into. Never had someone been entirely silent and unmoving while standing in the doorway. What kind of amateur was this?

The door closed and an icy tendril of fear grasped my heart. What in the-

"Amaya?"

That voice. It was the absolute last voice I'd been expecting. That beautiful, wonderful voice that so often had poked fun at me, advised me, comforted me, called out my name, and expressed love for me in a million different ways. A voice that was sometimes rough and hoarse, often tired, occasionally almost musical when there was an attempt at singing or humming.

I'd been listening to that voice for years now. Years. And I'd longed to hear it so badly these past few months.

Never had it sounded so tentative, so broken, so... so tired.

I'd heard it in my dreams, imagining every possible way that we might meet again. Maybe it'd be by chance, by accident, maybe it'd happen like I'd read about in love stories, or maybe it wouldn't be until after I died, and we met wherever the hell we ended up. But somehow, in all my nightly visions of us reuniting, I hadn't expected him to just... come home.

It'd been so long. I thought he was dead. It was a lot easier than living with the heavy hope that he was alive, because that came with so many terrifying possibilities. Those scenarios came with nightmares. He could be alive, but in a ditch somewhere alone. Alive, but so terribly injured he couldn't move. Alive, but sitting in a torture chamber somewhere. Alive, but a prisoner of war. Alive, but stranded with no way to come home. Alive, but alone, and living with the thought that we might be dead.

I was so shocked I didn't really trust my mind that it was real. This is it, I thought. I'm losing my mind. I already hear him when I'm asleep. Now I'm hearing him when I'm awake, too? I'm really losing it, now.

But the voice came again. "Emi?" A pause. "A-Amaya?"

My body acted on instinct. The knife fell from my hands once my mind finally caught up. He was alive. He was here. Levi, my love... he'd come back. God, I hoped this wasn't my mind playing tricks on me.

With the lightest of footsteps – because somewhere in the back of my mind I still refused to acknowledge the possibility that this wasn't a dream – I took a step out into the living room. At the sound of the blade hitting the wood floor and the slow movement of me coming to a stop just out of the hall, his eyes snapped up to meet my own.

My heart fluttered at the simple act. We'd spent countless hours now just looking at each other, but I'd nearly forgotten how it felt. After so long without it, I'd forgotten how intense his gaze was, and yet also how gentle. How warm it made me felt. How safe. How protected. How loved.

Only a few feet separated us, now. "Levi," I said quietly, the name sounding almost foreign on my lips. As I stood frozen, so did he, as if the slightest movement would shatter reality and we'd both wake up from whatever cruel dream this was.

As we stood there, it was almost like we were seeing each other for the first time again. There was that long gash across his face, splitting it in two. There was a patch over his eye, but as if noticing my gaze drift over it, he reached up with one hand to pull it off his head. The eye underneath was damaged, and permanently so, I'm sure; it was ghost white, paler than even the pale blue of his undamaged eye that looked me over.

I'm sure he very quickly picked up on the hesitance I had in putting weight on my left leg, the one that still hadn't completely recovered. I could walk fine enough, but it ached on cold mornings and it hurt to put weight on it too often.

What he couldn't see was my missing ear: I'd taken to leaving my hair loose and down, because the stares I'd get when outside were frustratingly obvious. I'd lived here for how long? They knew damn well we were a family of soldiers. And soldiers got injured. That didn't give them the right to look at me like I was a freak.

One of Levi's hands – the one with all five fingers – came to clutch the fabric over his heart tight. He was wearing his uniform still, dirty and ripped. Glistening on his ring finger was his wedding band and I smiled when I saw it. Tears welled up in my eyes as we took a few steps closer.

"Hi, Maya," he said softly, almost timidly. His shyness was terribly cute and endearing and confirmed that this was still my Levi, despite everything.

"Hello, Levi," I replied. A tear escaped my eye, but I wiped it away before he could. "You're real, right? Tell me this isn't a dream."

"Does it feel like a dream?"

I laughed, despite myself. "Yes," I answered simply. "It doesn't quite feel real, and yet... I want it to be. Is that strange?"

"I'd say so," he said. "But... I hate to admit it, but I've imagined a shitload of ways that we'd meet again."

"Me too," I admitted. "I didn't really think that you'd just... show up."

"I'm here now," he said. "I, um. Can I...?"

"You don't need to ask," I said gently. With a slight nod he reached out, looking down and taking my hand in his uninjured one. With a level of tenderness bordering on utter devotion, he pulled me closer, guiding me to him. He seemed hesitant to use his other hand, so I took it gently into my own and guided it to my face, offering him every opportunity to pull away if he so wanted to.

But he didn't. His eyes followed as he trailed the remaining fingers of that hand along my cheek before settling on my jaw. "You feel real," he breathed out.

"If this is a dream," I said with a smile, "I don't want to wake up."

"Me neither," he said. "It was a long trip back home."

"Yeah," I sighed. "God, I... I want to kiss you, but if I do, will I wake up?"

"Let's find out," he said, effortlessly smooth. With his bandaged hand against my jaw he used it to pull me closer. And finally, finally, we were only a breath away. His warmth neared, and my breath hitched as our lips met.

We still meshed so wonderfully. His lips were still so warm, so tender, so sweet. I wasn't sure how long it'd been since he'd even had the luxury of drinking tea, but he still tasted of it, and smelled of pine and lavender. I smiled against him, despite the fresh tears running down my face and the sobs threatening to escape me.

The kiss was sweet and soft, tender and loving. When we pulled away, my eyes fluttered open and I nearly sobbed with relief when I realized that I didn't wake up. This wasn't another dream.

This was real. He was here. Levi was home.

"I missed you so much," I whispered. Levi pressed his forehead to mine before even bothering to open his eyes.

"I missed you," he said. "The entire time we were chasing Eren, I... Fuck, I couldn't stop thinking about you two."

"I know," I said, hearing the shakiness in his voice. He was about to cry. But I didn't want to see him cry, not now: he was a war hero and easily the strongest fucking man alive. He'd been through so much. He just got home; this should be a happy time. "I was worried about you. So, so much. But me and Emi, every night, I'd tell her stories of you. And we'd come up with new ones, so we can tell you."

That made him chuckle. "Yeah? I like the sound of that." Lovingly, he reached out with that right hand of his and went to brush my hair back. What he wasn't expecting was for my hair to catch on nothing and fall back to frame my face. Eyebrows furrowed, he leaned slightly towards my left side, lifting my hair out of the way. I glanced away as he gazed over the missing appendage. "What happened here? Can you still...?"

"That day we were at the harbor," I explained. "I got caught. Messed up my leg pretty bad, too. And don't worry, I can still hear from it, it's just... harder to tell where it's coming from."

"So you were taken," he said. "Jean saw you, but you were gone the next time he looked."

"Yeah," I murmured, "it was rough. But that's a story for another time. You're home, my love, and... I missed you so much. Not a day went by that we didn't. Sometimes I'd wake up and roll over and think you're there in bed with me."

"I did the same," he said. "A few times I actually wanted a body pillow."

I covered my mouth as a laugh escaped me. "Oh, really?"

"No," he said with that damn smirk I'd missed so much, "of course not."

I rolled my eyes and laughed again as I took him into my arms. He hugged me back, pulling me close. I squeezed my eyes shut and didn't fight it when tears began to fall again. "We're done fighting," he said quietly. "I promise. I don't care what else happens. We're home for good."

"Are we retiring our wings?"

A nod. I couldn't help but agree. We'd done enough.

The rest of that day flew by; Levi held onto Emi, and she was latched onto him, much in the same way that she had when the two of us had reunited in Reyes' front lawn. I didn't get in the way. They needed this time. Both of them.

Levi needed the reassurance that she didn't find him frightening and that she was truly alright, while she needed to just hold him. She'd missed her father. She wanted nothing more right now than to just hug him.

Catching up could come later. Right now... they just needed to hold each other.

Late in the evening, everyone finally settled in for bed. I let Levi bathe Emi, help her into pajamas, and read her a story before bed. Then we both bid her a goodnight, wishing for her good sleep, and reminding her that we loved her.

Then, at last, we retired to our room. We got into bed, and there was no hesitation in the way we latched onto each other. No words exchanged, no ulterior motives in the way we felt each other, just love. All was quiet, all was gentle, and all was loving, caring, cherishing. All was perfect.

At long last, Levi was home.

And I fell asleep.

—

When next I woke, it was with a smile on my lips and warmth in my heart. My mind regained consciousness before my eyes even opened and I pulled myself closer to Levi's side of the bed almost instinctively.

My brow furrowed; it was cold. Was he up already, then? One of my hands lazily traced across his side, searching unintentionally for the slight dips in the bed that should still be there if he was in bed only minutes ago like I thought.

...

They weren't there.

"Levi...?" I opened my eyes and lifted my head. It felt impossibly heavy, like I'd been asleep for ages. Then it all came rushing back to me and I gasped, sitting up. "Levi!"

It took only moments more for my brain to make sense of the images imprinted so prominently in my mind; it'd been a dream. A fucking dream. Reuniting with Levi... I'd made it up. It was a cruel joke, conjured up by my brain to make me suffer more.

The room was dark. It was still the middle of the night. My mind had the cruelty to make me live through reuniting with Levi but didn't even have the decency to let it take the entire night?

It took only a single second more for me to clue into why I'd woken up in the first place, because it was clearly still the middle of the night and why would I have woken up, if not for something making me?

I could hear Emi crying. I made to get up when the bedroom door was pushed open, and she ran in.

She made a beeline right for me and I leaned over, pulling her up into the bed as soon as she was close enough to leap into my arms. She was bawling her eyes out, incoherent nonsense leaving her mouth. I set her in my lap, rocking us back and forth gently, cooing gentle words into her ear.

"Mommy," she hiccupped out.

"I'm here, Emi," I assured her, "I'm here. Whatever scared you, it's gone now. I won't let anything hurt you."

She sniffled. "Really? You mean it?"

I huffed indignantly and incredibly dramatically. "Well, of course I mean it. As a matter of fact, I dare them to even try to get to you. I'd never let them."

"Mama," she said, "you're silly!"

"Maybe," I said, softly now, "but I mean it. I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

I rubbed her back with one hand, continued to rock us back and forth, and hushed her gently as she cried it out. Her sobs came and went; just as she'd calm herself down, whatever it was that had scared her would pop up in her brain again and it'd start again.

It was the tricky thing about nightmares. No matter how you rationalized it, your brain would just refuse to budge on it. It'd maintain the belief that it was real, that it could hurt you. Sometimes all it took to feel better was a gentle nudge from a loved one.

"You're safe and at home, my darling," I told her. "Nothing can hurt you here. I promise you that."

"E-Even the Titans?"

"Even the Titans," I replied slowly.

I hadn't wanted her to ever even see Titans. They'd been all taken care of by the time she'd been old enough to remember them, but there was no way to hide her from the Rumbling. I hadn't even told her yet that Uncle Pixis had become one. There'd been no reason to. Not yet, anyway. And how could I even begin to explain something like that?

"Mommy and daddy used to make a living killing Titans," I told her. "We're very good at it. They won't come near you. There are no more around, anyway. We took care of all of them here."

"Really?"

"Really. That's why the two of us are so popular, you know. Because we were so good at our job."

That made her giggle. "You're not popular!"

I gasped dramatically. "Yes, we are! We get recognized all the time!" I sat up a little straighter, tipping my chin up higher. "We're so popular, we got recognized even while we were trying to lay low and not get noticed - like spies." She made to rub her eyes with her snot-stained sleeve, and I guided her hand away, replacing it with my own. I dabbed her eyes dry gently, taking careful measures to dry under them and down her cheeks.

"You weren't good spies," she said quietly.

"No," I agreed. "I guess we weren't." I waited a moment, then spoke softly once more. "You're a very brave little girl, you know."

She blinked up at me as soon as I removed my hand from her face. There was an innocent look of wonder in her eyes, one so unabashedly pure that I couldn't help but smile.

"I'm so sorry that I was away for so long," I told her. "But I am so incredibly proud of you. You've been so brave for both of us, do you know that?"

"H-How?"

"Because you took care of Reyes for us," I explained. "He's getting old, see? And so he needs someone to look after him. And while his family was away, he had you to look after him. He was helping me do my job, and you were helping him do his. See?"

"Did you find daddy?"

"I did," I answered. She curled herself around me in my lap, clutching the shirt I was wearing in her fists and resting her head against my chest. I continued to rub her back in rhythmic patterns to soothe her. I planted a kiss on the top of her head before continuing. "I did find him. And he told me all about how proud he is of you. He loves you so, so much, Emi."

"I miss him," she said quietly.

"I miss him, too. I don't know when he's coming home, but he's going to do his best."

"You promised to bring him home, mama."

"I know," I said through a sigh. "I know. But I got hurt, so I couldn't."

"How did you get hurt?"

"Well," I began slowly, wondering how best to describe it, "there were people trying to keep us from finding Eren. Me, your dad, Auntie Hange, Uncle Jean... We were all there."

"Are they ok?"

"I don't know," I said honestly. "But they're strong."

"What about Eren?"

He was dead. But how do I tell her that?

"He won't be coming back," I finally decided. "He can't."

"Why?"

"He's gone somewhere we can't follow," I told her.

"Oh. Is he ok?"

"Yes," I said, nodding. "Yes, I think so."

"Mama," Emi said.

"Yes, love?"

"Who hurt you?"

"I..."

Emi turned, looking up at me with those beautiful blue eyes and suddenly I was winded, unable to speak and unable to do anything but look at her.

"They won't come back, will they?"

"No," I said, shaking my head. "No, they won't. There's nothing to worry about. They won't be back. But let's not talk about that anymore, ok? I'm here, and I'm alright."

"You need a stick," she said, and I didn't have it in me to correct her.

"That's right," I said. "I need a stick to walk now. But that's ok, because I'll find ways to still play with you. But despite getting hurt, I knew one thing, Emi: I had to come home. I needed to come home to you. So we'll be ok on our own until daddy comes home, won't we?"

"Mm-hm," she hummed reluctantly.

"That's my girl," I cooed affectionately. "So strong. Just like your mommy, right?"

She giggled, tilting her head back to look up at me. "Yeah!" I leaned down to kiss her cheek, getting another giggle out of her. Then I kissed her forehead, her temple, her other cheek – getting excited laughter from her with each one. "Mommy, s-stop!"

"Oh? Why would I do that? You sound like you're having so much fun!"

"N-No! Please, mommy!"

With a laugh I relented. "Alright, alright, but only because you said please."

Upsettingly enough, Emi was right. There was one promise that I hadn't kept, and that was returning with her father. But there was one promise that right here, and right now, that I could.

Gently, and while holding Emi steady in my lap with one arm wrapped around her, I leaned to the side towards my nightstand. I pulled it open and lifted out one of the only things stored inside: Mason's notebook. Since his death, I hadn't even so much as opened it. It'd been too painful to do so. But I had promised him that I would learn these new – well, now not so new – songs.

And maybe Emi would want to learn them with me. I had found that my daughter was much like us. She needed to be distracted from whatever was bothering her. For us, it would have been training more, diving into our paperwork, and the like. For her, it was usually a story. But maybe this would suffice.

And maybe I could learn a song or two before we fell back asleep.

—

It was incredible, really, what could happen in just a heartbeat.

It seemed to go by so quickly, and yet, a multitude of things could happen.

There are, of course, nearly infinite things that happen in the span of less than a second. Around the world, a lot happens, all at the same time. At the same instance in which a man dies, a baby is born. Within a second of someone breaking up with their lover, others could be sharing their first intimate moment. Someone reading a book could reach the final breaking point just as someone across the world reached their own.

All life existed at each moment. Whatever you were going through, odds were someone would be going through something similar.

How many couples shared kisses all at the same moment? Considering quick pecks, lingering kisses left on exposed skin, passionate caresses between the sheets, and everything between, it was impossible to tell. How many people endured some form of pain, all at one instance? Emotional, physical, mental, and any combination of the three, the number was always too high to count.

Even individually, measuring the length of a single heartbeat and the endless possibilities of each were just as astronomical a task to undertake.

In a singular heartbeat, I'd gone from a fearful little girl to one finally with a family. Way back when, when El had adopted me, and my grandmother could live with the knowledge that I was safe, I hadn't realized how truly significant that moment was until much later in my life.

El had been a guardian angel, sent to save a little girl from an untimely death in the underground city. El had been a soldier with far too good a heart to be left where he was, and yet he made the most of it. He found for himself a family.

And I was so terribly lucky and grateful that my grandmother had the sense to bring me to the station that day. For if she didn't, we might have both died later that day, that week, or that month, or otherwise lived until our demise paranoid, always looking over our shoulder.

My grandmother had saved me, as had El, when he decided to take me in. I had a family growing up, something so many with the misfortune of living down there could not say. I had El, my father, who would so readily give everything up for me.

Then Caden joined the picture. That first heartbeat in which I'd stood frozen by the door, nothing but surprise had filled me. It was all I could feel, until confusion chased the surprise away, followed closely by frustration. But then the boy had smiled at me, and my heart accepted him as my little brother. El had always had a bleeding heart; I should have expected it from him.

I'd realized I'd fallen in love with Levi all within the span of one heartbeat. I'd been so worried about him sacrificing himself by staying back to fight that group that had been hunting the children. It'd been so selfless of him; it awoke something that had been stirring in my heart for a long while.

The culmination of every little thing he'd done for me, every word he'd spoken, and every precious moment spent with him, even so much as the shy glances we'd send each other was this; the realization that I'd fallen madly, deeply in love with him.

I'd learned that I'd been in love for a while, I just hadn't known what it was. It took that one final push – that first real chance of losing him – that had sent me over the edge and falling further for the man I was so lucky to now call my husband.

Under the beautiful night sky that we'd been blessed with on our first night outside the Walls, it'd taken only a heartbeat for me to realize what I wanted. And what I wanted was to spend my life with the man who had been standing in front of me on the roof of that old, abandoned Scout base.

He was the one. I would accept no less than him, for he was no less than perfect in my eyes. No one could compare. No one ever would.

And so, in that heartbeat, I'd leaned in and kissed him for the first time. The moon and all the stars had been present and were witness to surely the greatest love story they'd ever get to see. Kissing him had been a split-second decision, one that I was eternally grateful that I'd made, and I was especially grateful that I had somehow mustered the courage to do it.

There was another monumental heartbeat in which I hadn't known what to do, but I went with what that man had told me to do. That man who I entrusted my heart to, the one that would forever remain the love of my life. I would trust him always, no matter what he told me to do, nor even if it went against all my instincts. My life and my heart would always be safe in his hands.

That's why, in that heartbeat, when I weighed the pros and cons of giving up, of letting myself succumb to the pain of both my injuries and the heartbreak of losing Farlan and Isabel, and he told me to hold on, I listened to him. No matter how much longer the pros list was, and how badly I had wanted to give up, his voice had been the one to far outweigh everything that I'd even thought about, and I went with what he said. I owed him my life for that.

There'd been one, precious moment in my life, which remained unparalleled by any other moment. It was the moment in which one foreign heartbeat joined my own. Only, it wasn't foreign because it was inside me. It was the mark of a beautiful new life, one that I was growing.

I had, despite everything I'd destroyed in my life, somehow managed to create something. And what a beautiful piece of art it was. My daughter. My little girl. My darling. My lovely little Emiko, the spitting image of her father. Bubbly and intelligent, bold yet sweet, and with an attitude that would rival my own on my worst days, she was perfect.

Similarly, the singular heartbeat in which Emi was finally born, also landed on a league of its own. It'd been incredible. Hours of pain, months of frustration, and enough worry to last me a lifetime, she was finally here.

When finally I could feel her little heart pound against her chest as I lowered her to lay against my own for the first time, all the pain and suffering I'd faced in my life had been worth it. I'd never believed the midwives, the other mothers I'd met, and the books I'd read which told me that just looking at the child I had created for the first time would make everything else feel like merely a stepping stone to that moment, a mere foothill compared to the mountainous pride and love that swelled in my heart.

But they'd been right. Each and every single one of them.

Going back a bit, there'd been the heartbeat in which Levi's had lined up with my own, I was sure. Where finally, our two distinct lives, though already by then so uniquely entwined that parting was simply out of the question for how entangled we were, had connected truly as one. Our hearts, two separate entities, had become one. The lines between our two lives blurred. We were connected. Indistinct. Linked. Forever pledged to the other.

It was, of course, when we'd said our vows and became husband and wife. When we had, of love everlasting and love eternal, made a vow. A vow to each other. A vow confessing and setting in concrete our love.

Those moments would remain imprinted in my soul as some of the best moments of my life.

—

There was one heartbeat, one which I was suffering to get through now, which solidified itself as the worst.

It'd been such a normal day. A lovely day, even. But now I wanted nothing more than to just keel over.

For within that moment, I had felt electricity surge throughout my body. It was sudden, and terrible, and left as quickly as it had come. In that one heartbeat, I knew exactly what it had been, and what it meant. But I was right here. Levi and Emi were both right here, I had to get away. It couldn't happen now, it couldn't! Not when we'd all finally become a family again!

But there it was again, only stronger this time, and-

The strike of lightning made contact with the nape of my neck and I cried out in pain. The pain did not last long. I could feel sinuous fibers attack to my neck that then expanded outwards, upwards. I was soon encased in flesh and still there was movement, there was growth. My eyes closed. When they opened again...

I was no longer Amaya. I was bigger now, perhaps ten meters tall. My eyesight was fuzzier now, and somewhat murky, as though I were underwater. I was standing tall, and even so much as lifting my hand felt slow and clumsy.

I could feel nothing other than hunger. It drove me, distracting all my other senses from anything that wasn't finding my next meal. Oh, and there it was now. A man and a child.

The man had fallen over, the child clutched in his arm tightly. The child was crying, and the man's eyes were blown wide as he sat there in the dirt. He looked terrified, and rightly so. I knelt, the sound of my knee colliding with the dirt thunderous in my ears, but so too was the child's wailing.

The man shook his head as I lifted a hand. I was so hungry, so hungry; and these two didn't seem to want to put up a fight. That made it easier for me, then. The man scrambled backwards, trying to escape my reach. Only, he couldn't.

No, wait. This isn't right. I can't- I don't want to! That's my family!

But I must. I'm so hungry. They're not my family anymore.

—

I awoke with a gasp. I took note of my immediate surroundings; I was in my bed, at home, safe and sound. Safe and sound. I was safe. So was Emi, still curled in my arms, clutching my shirt in her little hands. I released a shaky breath and ran my hand through her hair.

"Another nightmare," I sighed out. I lowered my head back to the pillow and pressed my free hand to my forehead. Tears formed in my closed eyes and I didn't even try to stop them from flowing. I just wanted this to stop. I couldn't take it anymore. All I wanted to do was sleep. That was it! And my mind was keeping me from doing so for more than a few minutes at a time.

Was it really too much to ask to sleep through the night?

I'd done it so easily the other night, in Levi's arms... I hadn't been woken by one of my nightmares, but because Levi had one. And then it had been him to gently rouse me from my sleep that morning.

I reached up and gently tugged the curtain open, just enough so I could guess at what time it was. A gray, murky kind of light drifted into the room. It was dawn, or nearing it, anyway. Probably about time I got up. Or... maybe I'd stay in bed, until Emi woke up. I wouldn't want her to wake up without me here and get scared.

She'd been scared enough these past few days. I never wanted her to feel that fear again. Not that kind of fear, anyway. If she felt scared to push past her comfort zone later in life, I'd welcome it. If she felt scared to try something new, to be brave, I'd welcome that, too. But to be terrified like that...

I never wanted her to be afraid of things hurting her. No child should have to be scared of that. Of Titans. Of her parents dying. Of her dying. So I'd stay here, and when she awoke, I'd be the first thing she'd see, with a smile on my face.

—

I was the first thing Emi saw that morning. I welcomed her from sleep with a smile and she looked at me so cutely, the sleep still clinging to her eyes and a languid smile on her face... She really was perfect. The best of the both of us.

All that I loved about Levi – which was everything, save for his grumpiness – could be found in her. And I liked to think that she took only the best parts of me as well. Though... if we had another child, maybe they would look more like me. That'd be a welcome change.

The day had started very well.

As Emi played once her breakfast was done, the doctor inspected my leg, leading me through some exercises I could do when it started to feel better. For now, it just needed to rest, to heal. But when I got a little stronger and the pain subsided, he showed me what I could do, to regain the strength in that leg.

It really was a nasty injury, but already I could see minute improvements from just the other day when I'd seen it for the first time. The doctor also checked my ear. And everything seemed fine, for the most part. It was a calm day, to start. But then things took off once more.

Emi had skipped into the living room. She came happily up to us as I tightened the bandages up by my knee. She placed her hands on my other leg, and I smiled at her. "Hello, love," I greeted. Even the doctor smiled at her from where he was, knelt in front of the couch where I was sitting. He'd only just finished checking the wound, making sure it was still clean.

"Mama," she said happily, "can I have a snack?"

"Emi," I sighed, "we just had breakfast. You can't possibly be hungry again."

"But I am," She argued. "I want a snack, mommy!"

"No, Emi," I said firmly, securing the bandage around my leg. "It'll be time for lunch soon enough. You can pick what we have, ok?"

She huffed. "Daddy would have said yes."

"Daddy isn't here right now," I reasoned, "and he'd do anything you asked of him, darling."

Emi whined lowly, dropping her chin to rest on her hands, still resting on my leg. I ignored it, sitting up straight and fixing the skirt I was wearing over my legs again. "Mommy," she said again, her tone alone telling me she was about to push another one of my buttons.

"Yes, love?" I met her eyes evenly, smiling softly at the slight pout on her lips.

"Can we play outside?"

"Outside...? It's pouring out, honey, we can't go outside."

"But I like the rain! You do too!"

"I do like rain," I confirmed, "but it's too cold out." I ran a hand into her hair, still loose and messy from her night. "We can go play something in your room."

"I don't want to," she protested stubbornly. "I want to go outside!"

"And I'm telling you, we can't," I said. "It's too cold out, you'll only get sick. And I am on strict orders from this nice doctor to take it easy so my leg can heal, and we can play together all we want once it's better."

"But mommy!"

"I said no, Emi."

"Daddy would let me!"

"Your father would agree with me," I told her sternly. "It is too cold for you to go out and play right now and what I say is final. Do you understand me?"

Her bottom lip started to quiver but I remained firm. Angry tears formed in her eyes and she pulled herself away from my leg. "I want daddy here, not you!"

Oh, boy.

She turned on her heel and ran to her room. I could hear her door close after her, and I dropped my head into my hands. "What a mess," I muttered.

I don't even know what to do now. Talk to her? Give her time? I have no idea how to even... God, I need help. Levi, I... I need help. Can I do this alone? It's not a question. I have to. I can't question myself. I'm a good mother, I am.

Am I?

Goodness.

Later, when I called for her, she did come out for lunch, and even later, for dinner. Things were quiet, definitely a bit stilted, but... I didn't really know what to do. For goddesses' sake, I was nicknamed the mother of the Scouts of all things and I couldn't even figure out how to fix this.

Ironic, in a way.

After dinner, as things were winding down, and only after I finished the dishes with the doctor's help, I headed to Emi's room. She missed her father. No one could blame her for that. I missed him, too.

I knocked on the door lightly, almost hesitantly. "Emi, darling? Can I come in?" A small voice answered me, and I smiled. I opened the door slowly, letting it swing open on its hinges. I leaned forward slightly to see into the room. She was on the floor, playing with her toys scattered around her. I walked into the room quietly, keeping a tight hold on my crutch.

She watched me with wide, curious eyes as I approached. As soon as I was close enough, I adjusted a hold on the crutch and bent down, most of my weight on my good leg. I scooped her up into my arms, then stood. I smiled when she giggled, and I walked over to the bed. I perched on the side, then slid backwards until my back was to the wall. I adjusted her to sit in my lap, leaning back against me.

She tilted her head back against my breast to look up at me. "Mommy?"

"Emi," I said gently. "Do you understand what I was telling you earlier?" She nodded, slowly. I wrapped my arms around her, clasping in front of her belly. "When I went to go get daddy, I got very hurt. I want to play with you outside, but I can't right now, or it'll hurt me more. I'm already moving far more than I'm supposed to. That's why I have to listen to the doctor, so I can better as quickly as possible. And you don't want to get sick, right?"

"Right," she echoed.

"Just like how you have to listen to me and daddy, we have to listen to people, too. But it's only because we want what's best for you, and they want what's best for us. I didn't mean to raise my voice at you earlier. I'm very sorry. Can you forgive me?"

She nodded again. I pressed a kiss to her forehead. Her eyes closed as I did, and when they opened again, she grinned up at me. Then she turned in my lap so she could face me, being oh so careful of my left leg. "I'm sorry too, mommy!"

"I forgive you, sweetheart," I cooed, kissing her nose. She giggled and wiped it away with her sleeve, keeping her eyes on mine the whole time. "I miss daddy, too. He's the strongest man I've ever met, so I'm sure he'll come back home to us."

"Promise?"

I can't promise something like that, something that I can't control. I can't. I can hope and pray all I like, but if he's gone, he's gone. If he's alive, he'll keep fighting to get to us. But I simply cannot promise that he will return, because... that might not be true. However, I can promise something else. Something that I can control.

"I can't promise something like that," I said, "but I can promise that so long as I wear this ring, he'll keep trying."

I showed her my ring, and she looked at it as though it was the most important thing in the world, with all the wonder in her eyes she could muster. Emi clasped both of her hands around my ring finger, as though to keep it in place. Then she looked back into my eyes.

"Never ever take it off, mommy!"

"I never do," I assured her. "Never ever. And I never will."

She looked back at the ring, then nodded resolutely, as though choosing to believe in it. She looked to me again, smiling suddenly. "Wait here, mama!"

"Oh," I said, surprised, as she climbed off my lap and off the bed right after. "...Ok."

She dashed out of the room. I didn't have to wait long for her to return. When she did, she pushed the door shut behind her by leaning against it as I peered curiously at what was in her arms. Clutched to her chest was a journal. Weathered, old, the pages yellowed with time. It wasn't until she returned to the bed and settled next to me, the journal held out to me in her outstretched arms, that I realized there were two of them.

The older one, weathered and torn and yellowed, was... oh, my goodness. It was Caden's old journal. I hadn't reread it in a long time. There'd been no need to. I knew the whole thing practically by heart, after having read it so many times.

The other journal was Mason's. It was a far sight cleaner and newer than Caden's, especially because we'd used it just last night, and I taught her one song before she fell back asleep following her nightmare. Tucked between the two journals was a small, folded piece of paper, covered by small handwriting on both sides.

Levi's letter to me, for me to read only in the event that he died. I lightly scoffed as I held it between my thumb and forefinger, not allowing my eyes to focus on any of the words etched onto the folded part I could see.

She must not have noticed that it was between them. I'd put it there last night, for safekeeping. When I put Mason's notebook back in, it was pressed between them. She likely didn't know which journal was which, so she grabbed both.

"Mommy," she said, "can you teach me more?"

"You're missing a word, darling," I told her even as I opened Mason's journal in my lap, setting the note atop the other journal at my side.

"Please!"

"Of course, love."

And so we sat on her bed, and I patiently taught her to sing one of the songs Mason had never gotten the chance to teach me.

The house was quiet as we did, the only sounds being that of our joined voices; mine, soft and gentle as I progressed through the notes Mason wrote, and that of my daughter's... light, airy, never quite hitting the right notes and yet making it sound better than I ever could.