Haven

Swallowing away my tears, I stretched out my hand to him, feeling how he accepted it with a firm grip. I pulled him up- he almost lost his balance. Blood was gushing out of his lip, his cheekbone was bright red, the skin around his eyebrow was cut.

"Zeph.." I repeated, for once feeling so discouraged, so helpless. All I had tried for him was to feel at ease, to feel completely okay about his autism because it was okay. Tried for him to trust, to let him know not every person was that miserable as some people, sadly, were.

Though, this whole situation had proved everything against it. We were back at square one, and I didn't know if I would be able to save him too, this time. How could he still have faith in humanity after this? After everything he had already been through? That, I didn't know.

Tightly holding onto his hand, I pushed my way back inside, through the mass of sweaty people but stopped when Tara stood in front of us. "What happened?" Her features were laced with concern, but I was exhausted. I couldn't do it anymore.

I stared at her, for moments long, then pushed past her and took Zephaniah with me over to the restrooms. Entering, I ignored the girls that eyed us, gushing over Zephaniah until they saw his face. I locked the both of us in one of the toilets, lowering the lid so he could sit down on it.

He did and reached for the toilet paper, but I held him back. "Let me help you." I said softly, looking into his eyes. His right eye watered uncontrollably, but it was the one near his red cheekbone. Luke had hit him, hard. And Zephaniah had yet so say a word.

I was afraid, I didn't know if he was in a shutdown or not, but since he was responsive, even when it was without words, I didn't think he was.

"Are you here with me?" I wondered, my eyes trailing down his bruised and bleeding face.

"Pretty sure I am." Zephaniah mumbled, the left corner of his mouth curling lightly. "Unless I'm dreaming, I- I feel dizzy, though."

"No wonder." I said sadly, tugging at the roll of toilet paper to get some off. Folding it, I dabbed it against his bleeding lip. Zephaniah squeezed his eyes closed in response- he was in pain. "I'm so sorry, Zeph. I'm so sorry." I breathed out, a quiet whimper leaving his parted lips.

He blinked his eyes open, glancing at me. "Is okay, Have."

"But it's not." Tears managed to escape from my eyes, them dripping down onto Zephaniah's trousers as I was hovered over him, lightly tilting his face as his chin was between my fingers. I felt his warm breath on my skin, making it feel warm but tingly at the same time. I was aware of our closeness right now- I wasn't sure if he was.

My eyes roamed over his face, them resting when they stared into his eyes again. Zephaniah's eyes flickered away, he stared at something that was beside me. Sighing sadly, I continued to wipe off blood, Zephaniah holding some toilet paper against the cut in his lip himself. I wondered what was going through his head right now.

He was so calm. So extremely calm that it scared me. Had he given up?

"Have? Are you in here?" Ittarah. It was definitely Ittarah. I glanced at Zephaniah, he was already looking up at me. I didn't answer, I was furious.

"You can go." Zephaniah whispered, his eyes looking bigger now that he was looking up. The strange, bright light reflected in his mystifying green colour. "I promise."

"I can't leave you now, Zeph. Look at you.." Tears dripped down again, never had I ever felt this emotional before. I couldn't really understand myself- I had always been the optimistic, positive girl, but now, at this very moment it had all faded, like the mist when the sun would wake up from the dark night.

"Haven! Please, come out!" Tara yelled, she seemed frantically. "Please.."

My eyes went from the closed toilet door, to Zephaniah. Maybe he wanted to be left alone for a while, maybe he needed the break from everything, from people, from the situation.

"Stay in here, okay? I'll be back as soon as possible." His tiny smile gave me a sparkle of hope, I closed the door behind him, watching how he had locked it again. It made me feel relieved.

My eyes instantly met Tara's worried ones. She dried her cheek, held my wrist and dragged me outside, pointing at Luke. "He's crying. He's crying! What did Zephaniah do?!"

Abruptly, I stood still, looking at her in pure disgust, if it wasn't anything else. "Are you serious right now? Do you hear yourself? What did Zephaniah do?" Emotions raged inside of me- I knew I had to try really hard to keep them all inside of me, before I would burst out and smack each and everyone that was near me at this very moment.

"Luke never cries, idiot!" Tara sneered, the tears rolling down her cheeks. "What did you two do?! How could you possibly have hurt him this much?"

I stared at her, my lips parted. I was speechless, no words made its way into my mind. I was perplexed, I couldn't understand how she had the guts to say something like that. I wondered if she was being serious right now, or was she simply afraid of the situation they had gotten themselves into?

"Really, Tara? Really?" I said quietly, my emotions caught up in my throat. Somehow, anger and frustration were always expressed into tears when it came to me. Perhaps, it was to protect myself- better said- to protect those that would be around me at that very moment, for I'd smack. I just wished I could let it out in a different way sometimes.

"You make a problem out of everything, Haven." Luke scoffed, his jaws clenched as he stared at me. His gaze was intimidating, but I wasn't afraid of him. His eyes glistened, but that still made me wonder why Tara had looked so frantically. "Make us seem like the bad guys in any situation, but have you ever seen what he has done to us? To Tara?"

"What, Luke. What did he ever do to you?" I genuinely wondered, knowing he had no answer to that, anyway. Zephaniah had always minded his own business, something the world should've done more.

Luke huffed, hovering over me. "What didn't he do, know- all. He must've never told you, your perfect little boyfriend only wants to show you his good sides, if he has any. He beat Tara up, several times. You think that's normal? She broke her pink once, she almost suffocated because of him. He ruined her birthdays, their family days. Everything."

Tara didn't say anything. Her mind seemed to be battling. Her hand was holding tightly onto Luke's one, but her eyes were glued to her shoes.

"What did he do?" I challenged, searching for eye contact with Tara.

Tears dripped down her face, she shook it slowly.

"Tell me!" I blurted out before I could hold myself back, stepping closer to Luke. I stared into his eyes for as long as it took him to take a step back, pushing me away.

"Blame everything on the autism. Taking advantage of it. He hates her, isn't that obvious? Just tell everyone it was a meltdown and they'll simply accept it and get over it. He ruined her life." Luke spat out, saliva falling onto my face. I wiped it off, my gaze became harder, so did my expression.

I couldn't believe it. I couldn't, how dared he to say something like that? How dared Tara to keep her mouth shut when the only thing that was heard right now were his filthy lies? About someone who struggled with something, someone who was upset every time a meltdown had happened, afraid he had hurt people, who would never hurt people on purpose. How could they? Someone who hid his autism because of people like him?

It didn't make sense, at all.

"You know what, Luke? The saddest thing about this all is that his meltdowns at University were usually caused by you and Tara only." I stated, my eyes never leaving his eyes. "Meltdowns occur when the person has reached its crisis point, the autism, stress and anxiety coming together in a harsh way. Where he's overstimulated, overwhelmed, where he has lost control over his behaviour, emotions and feelings. Isn't that sad, that you were the cause of that?"

"How can you tell all of this, when you weren't even there with Tara and Zephaniah when it had happened? So you could judge by the situation why he had been overstimulated? Why people blamed him for it when he wanted to be helped?" I continued, the raging inside of me coming up like a hurricane. "You could see that nobody, nobody, ever listens to him, even when he's screaming at the top of his lungs to just be accepted. Is it so hard for you?"

"Everything is annoying about him. His face, his stupid, unique, long name, his behaviour. Everything." Luke scoffed, slouching back into the high chair as he chugged more of his beer down. "Besides, chill out, Haven. I was just teasing him, Tara was only joking at the lake. Not my problem that sensitive little soul can't take jokes. Oh, wait, he doesn't get jokes, right? Autistic people have it hard." He chuckled.

"Yeah, okay." Taking a deep breath, I felt how the tears brimmed in the corners of my eyes. "Yeah, joking about sexual assault is totally okay. Goodness, so funny!" A sudden sob left my mouth, the pain in my heart becoming stronger, I glared at Tara. She shook her head rapidly, she was crying herself.

"I didn't mean it like that!"

"But you did it anyway!" I fired back, my eyes falling on Luke. "Teasing. Teasing, huh? Teasing. Do you hear yourself? Your definition of teasing is beating someone until skin is cut, blood is dripping down noses and gushing out of lips? That is proper bullying, Luke. Proper abuse."

Luke laughed, he was drunk. "Bullying? That's something that happens in High School. We're in University now, babe."

"Bullying happens with kids, with teenagers, young adults, adults and even the elders. Bullying is from all times, from all ages, Luke." I choked out, my emotions getting ahead of me. "You surely don't know how to get along with people. It's better if you stay away from them and if you don't- I'll beat you as hard as you just beat Zephaniah."

Luke raised his eyebrows, standing up from the chair he was sitting on. "Come at me, Haven. Show me what you've got inside of you. How much you want to give for the sake of your sweet, little Zephaniah. Show me."

"I'm surely the mature one here, so no, I won't." I answered, crossing my arms over my chest. "You know what, Luke? Have you ever realised that you could be the reason for someone to completely give up? That you could be the person who could drive someone to kill himself? Have you ever realised that? Have you ever, ever thought about it?" I cried, again, Archie flashing through my mind.

Suddenly, I felt afraid. Really afraid, something I hadn't been ever since I was little. I was afraid of losing him, just because of someone else. His life was tough, he had never done anything wrong yet he was always the victim and had always been ever since he was little.

"Haven!" Tara cried out, her expression furious. "Act normal! Don't say something like that!"

"Why not?" I answered right away, looking at her. "It's reality, Tara. Say it, say it out loud. Did Zephaniah ever hurt you on purpose, or did those meltdowns always occur because of certain situations, people even? Say it, Tara. What did he do wrong to deserve all of this?"

"Joking about a woman that touched him in the bath, when he was six years old for goodness sake. Throwing private things around to get your attention. Using his difficulties to get your attention, laughing at him when he was suffering, just because you wanted your attention, for the third time. Just because you wanted to be seen, should never mean you had to do this in this way."

"Zephaniah knows we're not serious. He knows it's just teasing."

"This is not teasing, Ittarah!" More tears rolled down my cheeks, I couldn't contain myself anymore. I felt broken, for him. He had so much going on, had been through so much and this was all he got back. "I don't want to be your friend anymore. I don't even want to look at the both of you anymore. I'm exhausted. I'm done. The two of you have done something terribly wrong, and I hope that one day you will realise it. That one day the both of you will swallow your pride, apologize and treat him with kindness. I could say so much more right now, but obviously, the two of you don't want to get it through your thick skull. Leave him alone, from now on."

"Have! No, please!" Tara cried, but I turned around and rushed my way back inside, running over towards the toilets. His door was still locked, so I knocked quietly, my heart thumping loudly in my chest.

After a moment, he unlocked the door, kicked it ajar and glanced quickly, letting me inside. Most of his face was clean, but blood was still dripping out of his lip.

I stared at him, I couldn't hold it back anymore.

I cried and cried and cried. I cried until my throat hurt, until my eyes burned and until Zephaniah was flapping his hands. He reached for my hair, he rapidly played with it, his big, green eyes concerned as he kept staring at my face.

"I don't want you to end up like Archie, Zephaniah, please." I covered my face with my hands, leaning back against the walls. "Have you given up? Please tell me you didn't, I'm so afraid. All I'd ever wanted was for you to feel comfortable, to love yourself even when you're so aware of your struggles. Please, don't end up like Archie, please."

"I tried so hard, Zeph. I'm sorry everybody else is ruining it for you. When doesn't negativity win from positivity, right?" I continued, sliding down until I was seated onto the floor. Zephaniah was still staring at me, I was sure he silently agreed with everything I had said. He had given up. He was exhausted as well.

"One person is enough." His soft- spoken voice soothed me for a little moment. I dried my eyes and looked up at him, feeling confused as I didn't really know what he meant. Zephaniah's eyes lingered to a specific spot on my face, left cheek, his fingers still entangled with a strand of hair. "Is enough to let the negativity fade."

"What do you mean?" I kept looking at him, watching how his eyes intensely roamed all over my face.

"One person is enough to make someone's life worth living. I- I've seen it with Dad." Zephaniah swallowed, he was searching for the right words. "Dad cried a lot when I was little, I don't think he's aware of the fact that I know. I-I got woken up a lot when I just went to sleep. Dad would climb- climb into my bed and cry and tell me how sorry he was about everything. I felt helpless, I'd silently cry myself because I felt so sad for him and I-"

He stopped, his eyebrows furrowing lightly as he thought. "Sometimes he had an angry outburst, he thought I wouldn't hear as- as I would be playing upstairs, but I had heard them all. When he had that he came upstairs and he would randomly cuddle me. I think he's always thought I was a little- a little oblivious to things but I heard, felt and sensed it all, always."

"When mummy Hannah came it went away, everything. He barely cried in my bed, he had no angry outbursts anymore and he-" He swallowed again, his lips parting. "One person was enough to change his whole life. Oh, and mine by the way." He smiled lightly. "She's my mum now, of course." He smiled again. "One person is enough to.. survive."

"Do you have that one person in your life right now?" I wondered, my eyes falling on the beautiful guy in front of me.

Zephaniah hummed, but his mind wouldn't allow him to express who it was.

~~~

Havens reaction to all of it.. opinions?

Do you think what she said to Luke and Tara was fair?

Zephaniah? Do you think he's speaking the truth, or did give up?

Let me know your thoughts!! Votes comments feedback much appreciated xx