"Hateful to me as the gates of Hades 

is that man who hides one thing in his heart and speaks another."

― The Iliad, Homer 

"What are they saying?" 

V whisper-shouted to Rain, placing a bowl of rice and a bowl of steamy soup and a water bottle on her nightstand, furrowing his eyebrows with concern.

Rain placed a palm on the glass wall and lifted the other to signal him to stop talking without turning.

Instead of answering him, she focused on listening outside. 

RM and Suga had decided to recreate a melodrama Fight Club knockoff, where Suga was living his Tyler Durden moment.

Then the raining scene from the Notebook. Thankfully, sans the kissing.

"Nothing, as she is leaving." Suga's voice seeped through the crack of the glass, and her heart shattered once more while she wondered how can something she doesn't have anymore can break.

But he said we would figure it out together.

He wouldn't say empty words.

"...Help her pack her shit."

RM looked at her then. Unsure, broken, desperate. A silent form in the rain like an omen marking the tide's turn.

He betrayed her.

He had found out before Suga saying it and didn't warn her.

He knew Suga had killed the lawyer and sheltered him.

He chose him over her.

Disloyalty had a taste.

It was bitter.

It was sour.

It was ever a little sweet.

And most importantly, it reminded her of something.

Open up to someone, trust them, and they are bound to leave you and betray you.

She turned away, empty and defeated, still shocked to her core.

Suga is the rightful Oyabun.

He was all along.

"Can you at least eat something?" V pleaded once more. He had noticed Rain's appetite was lost the last days, but now that Suga had mentioned it —demanded it— for her to eat, it was brought to his attention that he should have intervened sooner.

Rain shrugged, throwing away the towel she was wrapped with and pulling an oversized grey T-shirt on that hang over her shoulders, avoiding the spilled glass pieces on the floor with her bare feet.

"I'm fine." Her empty gaze slid over the room like looking for something. But hope wasn't an object, lying next to the couch or inside her closet. I will be. I have to be.

Even the half bottle of vodka she chugged had worn off. Best way to sober-up fast? Watching your whole life burning down to ashes. It leaves you with an even greater hangover.

"Just a few bites." V insisted.

"I said, I don't want—"

"When was the last time you ate a whole fucking meal?"

A silence took over, giving in to the pitter-patter of rain on the glass wall. The weather seemed to fall in line with the rest of her frayed life.

"Figured." He gently pulled her to sit on the bed. "The soup is leftover from what Jin cooked in the morning, but I heated it." He stirred it, picking up a spoonful.

"Please tell me you have anything more than soup and rice." She looked at him like a pleading puppy. "Anything. Weed, coke, a xan, hell even tequila at this point..."

"Eat the food first." He narrowed his eyes. "Did you eat at all today?" His brown eyes flashed angry, not revealing he had everything she mentioned except tequila in his pockets.

"I had an apple this morning." She shrugged again, looking away from his judgemental stare.

"Rain!"

"I was busy!"

"Rain!" He set down the spoon into the bowl, his mouth forming a frown. "No one is too busy to eat." He crossed his arms.

"I was!" But I also was still Oyabun till one hour ago.

"You used to eat the entire clan's weight in pizza and meatballs."

"Not sure why you are pointing it out like it's a good thing."

"Because not eating makes you hangry. You're acting like a spoiled brat."

"And you're acting like a fucking mother hen!"

"I didn't hear you yelling at Suga when he told you to eat!"

"He didn't try to spoon-feed me like a fucking baby!"

"Maybe he should have since you are acting like one! Even JB said you are bitching! Hell, Rain!" He exhaled, running both hands through his shiny blond hair. "Why the fuck were you with JB anyway? How?"

"He is not that bad." She rolled her eyes, avoiding an incoming spoonful of rice that V tried to sneak up to her mouth while she was talking.

"I know." He lowered the spoon. "I had the "delight" to meet him a few times... He is..." His face scrunched into a weird expression. "Kinda like you... but in a guy version." He murmured, looking into the soup. "Hot-tempered and hot as fuck, rageous, manipulative, has that dark, bad-boy aura but dresses like a G.Q. cover model... Yeah, I would tap and top that in a heartbeat."

The spoon of rice that Rain had lifted fell on the floor, the rice sprinkling everywhere like snow.

Her mouth also fell open. "You... you said it!" Her expression was one of a triumph, of V finally, in-your-face openly admitting it, while she practically heard the cherubim gospels from heaven.

"Yeah... Now, I will reveal more every time you eat." He smirked and lifted the clean spoon from the nightstand, filling it with rice and forcing it into her still open mouth.

She stayed like that, not swallowing the rice, still looking at him like a thoroughly shocked statue.

"Swallow that, and I'll tell you about Jungkook."

She swallowed with one gulp without chewing.

"That's blackmail!" She accused and scoffed, unscrewing the water bottle and drinking a few gulps.

"Learned from the best." V grinned, lifting another spoonful.

She grabbed the bowl and fitted it on her lap, then took the spoon from him.

"Start talking!" She pointed it at him and started eating.

V, satisfied, fell back on the bed with his arms behind his head like a pillow, grinning to the ceiling.

"He has that perfectly messy coal-black hair and that broody look like he hasn't slept for days, and his face is like the finest porcelain, his jawline is sharper than Jin's knives, and his eyes are darker than your soul, and don't get me started about that glare of seductively murderous intentions he throws here and there..."

"Jungkook? Are we talking about the same person?" She swallowed again, halfway into the bowl.

"No, bitch. Still talking about JB. You will unlock the Jungkook achievement only after you lick clean everything in both bowls."

"Ever been stabbed with a spoon?" She hissed maliciously for being tricked.

"No, but I have stabbed someone with a fork. Anyway, you know JB grew up with S—"

An intense knock at her door interrupted him, and both turned to look there.

RM cleared his throat from the other side.

"Rain. Are you decent?"

Rain weirded out looked at V for some sort of rational explanation.

He sat up, all solemn, and whispered to her. "He is probably afraid Suga will gauge his eyes out if he sees you naked or something." He snorted. Then yelled to RM. "Morally no, she isn't, but she is dressed if that's what you are asking."

RM walked inside, leaving the door open. His hair was still wet, but he had changed into dry clothes. Bandages delicately wrapped the knuckles of his right hand—Probably Jimin's work.

"Out." He faced V with a sharp inhale.

"He stays." Rain got on her feet, dumping the bowl on the nightstand with a thud.

RM looked at her, pressing his lips. Considering how to treat the situation delicately.

V eyes ping-ponged between the other two. "It's okay. I'll be outside..." He got up, making his way to the door. "...probably eavesdropping anyway." He murmured to himself.

Rain lifted a hand, stopping him on his track. "He. Stays." She challenged, crossing her arms, her eyes throwing daggers at RM.

The latter rubbed the back of his neck, looking up. "Please, Rain."

"HE. STAYS." She repeated, crossing the empty path fiercely, to come face to face with RM. Her glare said, fight me for it if you dare. And without a smirk, without a flinch, only through the power of pure determination, the words fell out of her mouth. "And so do I."

RM held her stare, searching it. "You heard what Suga said."

She didn't move a fucking inch. "And to me, he said that we would all figure this out together!"

"What the fuck are you two talking about?" V interrupted, but they didn't turn to look at him.

RM slowly shook his head with a sad frown. "He changed his mind, Rain."

"Then he shouldn't have said it!" She left distance between each word, lacing it with icy venom.

RM's eyes were pleading. I can't do anything about it.

It was at that specific moment right then, that Rain had a fucking epiphany and realized what this situation was.

And most importantly, why Suga had done it.

He had reassured her that they would talk after. Figure this out together. Given her hope.

She internally knew it wouldn't be true when he walked away. But she hanged on his word.

Then, what she feared came true.

He didn't keep his word.

He wasn't even considering letting her stay when he said it.

Entirely too cruel, even by his standards.

It was retribution.

For her fake promise that she will come back. For giving him false hope. Then, ripping it away.

Leaving her to drown in her despair, unable to do anything, as she did to him.

Suga was playing Nemesis.

The goddess of divine retribution.

Who punished those who succumb to hybris and arrogance.

Suga was in control of her having eaten the proverbial apple in the first place.

He had handed her everything despite their past.

But because of what she did, using him as a pawn, as he said, he judged that she didn't deserve it.

And now wanted to make her pay for her bad deeds.

Take back her undeserved good fortune.

Restore the order and maintain equilibrium by punishing her.

He had made her Oyabun.

And now he had un-made her.

And exile her.

She had crushed his ego, and now he was crushing hers.

She is leaving.

"No." Rain swallowed, her face still inches from RM's. "No," she shook her head in denial, drowning in the feeling of being robbed of the option to fight for herself.

"No!" She repeated, bracing herself and looking inside her for strength. Searching inside her for the last thread of courage that hasn't been shattered along with the pieces of her heart. With the remains of Suga's mug. With his undeserved trust.

It felt like it had vanished down the drain, along with her demons.

RM shook his head and passed around her, going for her closet.

"What the fuck is going on?" V demanded, tightening his fists on his sides. It was a rhetorical question. No, a question of denial. Because deep down, even though Rain didn't tell him what she heard, he felt where this was going.

"I'm not going anywhere!" She crossed her arms, getting once more in RM's way. Her voice was rock steady, even though her heart was beating erratically. "You're not touching me, nor my shit!"

RM tilted his head and turned, opening her closet like he didn't hear a word of what Rain just said. He pulled out the first piece of clothing and threw it at her. "Put something on, by the way. You look indecently horrible."

Rain left the shirt that landed on her chest to fall on the floor without removing her eyes from him.

"Although, I guess it's hard to look good," Rm continued, "when you are out all day and all night, plotting and building clans with our enemies, drinking yourself stupid and fucking anything that comes your way."

"You look like you could use some stupid drinking and fucking anything that might, unfortunately, come your way." She retorted, not denying his accusation about JB. No, she wouldn't give RM the satisfaction of explaining herself to him. She didn't owe him anything like that. Never did.

And why the fuck did he care anyway?

This was about to turn into a scene and win way more awards than Suga's and RM's sad performance.

"Here's the thing." RM narrowed his eyes, not backing up either. "Being in the clan is something I built from nothing, Rain. It wasn't handed in a silver platter to me. I fought with teeth and nails and paid with blood to gain everything I have. And I almost lost everything..." He stopped. Because of you, he wanted to say. But it wasn't true. He couldn't accuse her of being responsible for his choices. Whatever had happened between them was mostly his fault. And he was the one that had initiated it, most of the time.

His body pushed hers backward as he took a step forward, getting in her face. "Just trust me when I say this isn't a negotiation. This can't be undone. The Oyabun's order is on our skin. In our blood. And we will take our last breath before defying it. If Suga says you sit, you sit. If Suga says stand, you stand. If Suga says bow, you bow. And if he says to run a naked marathon with a dick-shaped hat and a but-plug up your ass, you do that." He paused, pushing forward. She didn't move a fucking inch, holding her stance for dear life. "And if Suga says you leave, then you pick up your ass and pack your shit, and you leave."

"Go fetch your fucking bone, RM, or even better, find someone to bone. Because I. AM. NOT. LEAVING." She breathed. "You will touch my things over my dead body."

"Honey," RM chuckled with condescending swagger, "I just punched my Oyabun four times. You think you are going to stop me?" He challenged, cracking his wrapped knuckles. Blood seeped through the white bandage.

"Just try me, asshole! I was your fucking Oyabun until an hour ago! Oh, wait! You knew I wasn't, and you didn't tell me!" She fisted the front of his shirt, pushing him back on the closet until he crashed.

He pushed her away, breathing heavily. His eyes wide, but Rain wasn't afraid. If he continued this, he would be found skinned alive down in the alleyway by morning. And he knew it.

"I knew for four fucking hours! Which you were out with fucking JB, drinking the sea and snorting the desert and fucking enough to make Lana Rhodes look like a cookie-selling girl scout." He stood tall, squaring his shoulders. "Oh, wait!" He mocked, using the same tone with her, "and you never were my Oyabun!" He rounded his eyes, challenging her more.

We didn't find the NDA. We found the real one.

The one that was inside Nanami's will. The one that passed everything to Suga since the moment of her death.

Fake death.

Something that RM didn't know.

Rain broke into chuckles.

Why should I shelter him?

Why hide what I know?

Why not expose him?

Why not just tell everyone the truth now?

"I am sorry, Rain. I actually am." RM threw her a look of sympathy mixed with pity. And turned, defying her, opening her closet and emptying it, throwing all her clothes out.

She watched as her t-shirts fell to the floor. Her skirts and jeans followed. And every piece touched the ground, making it real.

She is leaving.

Forming a sad, lifeless, black mountain of memories consisting of every time she wore them, of where she was, of who was she with, of when.

Everything.

Clothes she had worn and torn, clothes she owned for years and had made good use of, wearing them, working in them, partying in them, drinking in them, and fucking in them.

Clothes that were utterly meaningless until she wore them here.

A black, backless dress she had worn the first time she went to RR with RM.

A crop top and a skirt she had worn when she went out the first time with J-Hope.

One of Jin's pastel pink shirts that she had borrowed from him and never gave it back.

The leggings she always wore when they were training.

Her worn-off leather jacket that had traveled with her pocket knife in it, unknowingly.

The oversized t-shirt she was wearing when she raised hell and decided to punish Suga by doing his tattoo.

When she thought that was the first time they kissed.

When he had repeated her own words to her, from when they had actually first kissed.

When he said that he will break the back of love for her.

Those weren't clothes.

They were her memories.

And she will be dead and damned before letting anyone take them away from her.

Take her life away from her.

The life that was handed to her and cherished, only to be ripped away for Suga's retribution.

"I can't let you do this." She smiled at the pile of memories on the oak floor and regained her fighting stance.

And knew what she had to do.

She wouldn't let Suga have the last word.

It didn't matter as her heart knew the answer.

A decision had been made.

And she had to face the consequences.

And now, it was her turn.

Her turn to prove she is worth staying.

Her turn to prove is indeed made for it.

Her turn to prove that her place is here. That here is where she belongs.

Her turn to fiercely protect what's hers.

Her turn to break the back of love.

And if Suga wouldn't let her...then too bad.

Because she won't yield.