musical mood: twit - hwasa

It was easy for Cass to let her guard down, while at Hogwarts. Being surrounded by good people made it hard to push them away, to remind herself that she shouldn't get too close to anyone, lest Barty interfere. Lest they find out about him, and get her father sent to Azkaban.

She hated him, she hated him so much for putting her in this position. The choice should be easy, he'd never been a good father, after all, yet she couldn't allow herself to have him thrown in prison. She couldn't be that heartless, even though he had been.

This new revelation not only caused her to contemplate her father and brother more, but her mother as well. Diana had been the instigator in this entire thing. Diana had loved her son so much that in the end, she suffered Azkaban for him in her final days. It was bizarre, the concept of a love so unconditional. Cass wondered if her mother loved her that much, as an infant. Not that it mattered much, she was dead, after all. Who cared what the dead thought of the living?

It had been a narrow defeat for Ravenclaw, at the Ravenclaw vs Gryffindor match. Cass hadn't been paying much attention, her mind wandering throughout the game, but she could tell Naia and Terry did well. Just not well enough - Potter caught the snitch, in the end.

"Cassie!"

She turned around, stopping in her tracks as she'd been walking back to the Ravenclaw dorms. Several passing people turned to stare at her and the twins, who were still in their Gryffindor Quidditch uniforms for some reason, wearing identical smirks.

"Is there something you want?"

"Nice to see you too." Fred scrunched his nose.

"We won." George said, as though that made what he wanted obvious.

"Er, yeah, congratulations. You lot did well."

"Sooooo, you have to do you-know-what with that potion." George lowered her voice, and Cass's stomach dropped. In all the horrible things that had happened, that deal she made with them about Cedric and Ass Tonic 2.0 had slipped from her mind completely. Luckily, she'd finished the potion before break began. Or unluckily, considering she didn't want to do this.

"I hate you." She bit down on her tongue.

"We know you do." George patted her on the shoulder, and she swatted his hand away.

"So, Georgie and I were thinking, for maximum effect, we do it on your birthday. The 27th, right?" How Fred remembered her birthday was a mystery to her, considering she forgot it half the time.

"No way. I'm not ruining my birthday by drugging an innocent person!" She hissed, lowering her voice to prevent any evesdroppers.

"It isn't drugging, it's pranking." George rolled his eyes, as if she were so young and stupid. "Big difference."

"I don't care. I'm not doing it on my birthday. You're lucky I'm doing it at all!"

"You'll come around, you'll see."

*

Cass didn't return to her dorm that night, instead she chose to spend time with the Weasley twins in the kitchen, at their usual table. When they invited her, she should've said no, she really should've, but something possessed her. Maybe it was the intrigue of their positive personalities; she so desperately needed a break from her ruminating thoughts about Barty and Connor and how she wanted to die...

"You seem particularly glum today, Cassie. Even for your standards." George said over his butterbeer. Cass's drink was untouched.

She shrugged. "Maybe I'm mad that you're making me turn Cedric into a donkey."

"Okay, first, he's not becoming a full on donkey, and second, it only lasts a day!" Fred sighed.

George shook his head. "So dramatic, Cassie, honestly."

"I hate you."

"So you say, yet you're here with us instead of, what did Nott call you? The Lady League?"

"Yep."

"Speaking of Nott, I heard some pretty big news." Fred leaned in on his elbows, brown eyes glowing.

"What did Henry do this time?" Cass sighed. "Poison a first year with one of he and Theodore's illegal potions?"

"Please, if anyone's going to poison someone, it's you."

"Oi, unlike you and your bloody love potions and ass tonic, George, I have no malicious intents with the things I brew on my own. Usually..."

George flashed her a smirk, as Fred continued his tale.

"I heard from Dahlia, that the younger Nott, Thomas or whatever-"

"Theodore. I literally said his name ten seconds ago."

"Yeah yeah, him. He's apparently been engaged to Dahlia's sister. The one in your year, not the little one. Merlin, baby Burke is freaky..."

Cass's jaw dropped. "Theodore is engaged to Bethany?!"

Fred shrugged. "Yeah, well what I heard is Dahlia and Henry were originally engaged, but Henry turned out to be a disappointment or whatever, being sorted into Ravenclaw and generally being an idiot, and their uncle Cynric wouldn't allow it."

"You can remember a name like Cynric, but not Theodore?"

He shrugged again.

"You're unbelievable." She rubbed her temples with her fingertips. Well, it certainly made sense. Pureblood supremacists loved arranged marriages, to keep their blood "pure", and the Burkes and Notts were certainly in that label. Bethany's newfound agreement to date Colin made sense now, as well, given that she hated Theodore Nott more than most of the student body. If it got out that she was dating a muggleborn, maybe John wouldn't allow his son to marry her.

It was a disturbing thought, picturing a thirteen year old Bethany in a white wedding dress and flowers. Even more disturbing than her and Colin dating. At least one person was happy in that arrangement - she couldn't imagine Theodore was any more enthused about their engagement than her. Apparently she hadn't been the only one to have a terrible winter break.

"Cassie?"

"Hm?" She blinked, withdrawing from her zoned out trance.

"You good? You were kind of...out of it." George lowered his hand, which he had been waving in front of her face.

"Oh. Yeah. Sorry. I'm all good."

He raised his red eyebrows. "You sure?"

She nodded, forcing a grin. "So, what's the plan with Ass Tonic 2.0?"

"Wow, so desperate to change the subject, you'll talk about our dreaded prank." George sent her a wink. "What, do you no longer fancy Diggory?"

"I never fancied him." She lied through her teeth, biting down on her tongue, though they weren't entirely wrong. Thinking about Cedric made her think about Connor, about how she'd come to realise she did fancy him, and any thoughts of her ex best friend felt like a knife to the heart, rather than the previous butterflies. Wasn't a crush supposed to feel good?

Yet, when Connor did manage to evade her thoughts, Cedric went back to being a dream...it grew so confusing, it hurt her head to think about.

Fred snorted. "You're a terrible liar, did you know that?"

Part of her wanted to laugh at this.

Actually, Fred, I'm a brilliant liar. I lied to Connor for six years, and he didn't figure it out until it was practically spelled out to him. I'm lying to everyone right now that my brother is secretly alive. I'm lying more than I tell the truth, and the world is too stupid to see. My parents are both liars, worse than me. I have dishonesty in my genes.

Instead, she shrugged, biting down on her tongue. "Maybe."

"Well, our lovely Cassie-"

"Don't call me that."

"-our lovely Cassie," George repeated, giving her a smirk as she glared at him. "Pretty Boy certainly trusts you more than us, since you're so lovely-"

"-I'm not afraid to hex you-"

"-so you'll have to find a way to slip him the Ass Tonic 2.0. Are you up to the task?"

"I suppose I have to be."

"That's the spirit." George patted her on the shoulder, and for once, she didn't shake him off.

*

Cass hadn't realized just how popular Cedric Diggory was, until it came down to drugging him. Getting him alone, or in any way unsupervised proved to be an impossible task. Everyone seemed to be on guard, though, with Sirius Black on the loose. Apparently, he'd tried to stab Ron Weasley in his sleep, which was horrific. Everyone travelled in packs, Cass included, though that had less to do with Black and more with fear her brother would somehow break into the school and murder her and everyone she cared about.

Her fourteenth birthday fell on a Sunday, which she'd spent the day absentmindedly brewing potions in her room with no real goal, just experimentation. Brewing was the only thing that completely freed her ailed mind of anxiety.

While her roommates, of course, didn't know what was bothering her, they took the hint and let her be, wishing her a happy birthday and leaving for the library to study.

Cass only left her room for dinner, after two failed experiments resulted in explosions that nearly set their dorm on fire. The ends of her brown hair were singed from the blast, and she had soot covering her face, like she'd just used the floo network, but she didn't mind.

"Happy birthday!" Naia greeted with a bright grin as she sat down at the Ravenclaw table, handing her a tiny envelope with her name on it. "You got mail."

"Thanks."

"I was going to bring it up to you earlier today, but you seemed pretty into your potions. Speaking of which, you didn't blow anything up, right? You have...stuff on your face."

"A little. It's contained, so no need to worry. Only thing that got damaged was my hair."

"I wouldn't call it damaged." Luna tilted her head, blue eyes scanning her. "It's kind of devil-may-care."

Cass gave the second year a small smile as she opened the envelope. Part of her hoped it was from Connor, begging for her back as a friend, but she knew it wasn't. She hadn't been prepared for who it was, though.

Dearest sister,

Now that you're aware of my existence, I can send you letters without phrasing them as though I am our father. You must admit, sister, it was quite amusing.

It's your fourteenth birthday, isn't it? My sense of time and memory is a bit skewed, as I'm sure you can imagine.

I must keep this brief, lest our father discover I've wrote to you. If he does find out from you...well, I won't get into detail about what my revenge will entail. But keep our correspondence between us.

Have a lovely birthday.

Your favourite brother,

Barty

Cass instantly crumpled the note into a little ball, before anyone could lean over her shoulder and see it. Frantically glancing around at everyone at her table, no one seemed to be paying attention to her, all in the middle of various conversations, laughing and smiling and completely oblivious. Bethany, whom Cass was most worried about discovering her secret, wasn't even with them, she was sat with Colin at the Gryffindors.

"Where are you going?" Padma looked up from her conversation with Ana. Cass had stood up without even realising it, trembling from head to toe. "Are you alright?"

She couldn't say anything. She tried, she really did try to open her mouth and profess that she was fine, that nothing was wrong, to sit down and try to enjoy her birthday, but she couldn't. Her body and mind were two separate beings, refusing to cooperate with each other.

Just as she had done when she found out Barty was alive, Cass ran. She ran out of the Great Hall, not caring how ridiculous she looked, not caring about the attention she brought upon herself. She ran into Moaning Myrtle's bathroom - which seemed to be her typical place to go during her breakdowns, and subsequently threw up.

"Don't dirty my toilet!" The ghost shrieked as Cass gagged, dry heaving. "That one's my favourite, you stupid girl!"

Eventually, she leaned away, resting her back against the wall, her knees aching from how hard she'd hit the ground. The letter was still crumpled up in her left hand, as she took deep breaths, trying to calm her racing heart.

She couldn't do this. She couldn't live like this. How was she supposed to spend the rest of her life living in fear of this man? It had only been two months and she was already losing her mind. Was this going to be her life forever? Would it ever end?

Drowning herself in Myrtle's favourite toilet seemed more and more appealing with every second that went by.

She opened the letter, reading it over again, her fingers tracing the crumpled parchment, praying it was a prank. How had this managed to sneak by their father? Clearly, she couldn't ask him, or Barty would get some type of revenge she didn't even want to think about. She didn't think she could live with herself if he hurt someone because of something she did, even if it was their father.

"Cass?"

She shot up, letting go of the knees she had been holding to her chest, and peaking out from the stall she had been sitting on the floor of.

It was Cedric.

"Are you okay?"

She shot her head back into her stall, praying he hadn't seen her.

"Are you in here? I swear I saw you come in here..."

"She's in my favourite stall." Myrtle huffed. "Crying and throwing up."

Well fuck you, Myrtle.

She heard footsteps, and she pursed her lips together, banging her head against the wall.

"There you are." Cedric gave her a small smile, one that would usually make her childish heart soar, but not now. "I was going to wish you a happy birthday at dinner, but you kind of ran off."

"Sorry." She choked, her breath catching in her throat. She imagined she looked a mess - that was most birthdays for her, at least. She'd just about take being poisoned again right now.

"Don't apologize." Cedric blinked, looking a bit amused. He sat down next to her, resting his back against the wall, his eyes boring into hers in a way that made her heart race more than she thought possible. "I thought I'd check up on you. Are you alright?"

She shrugged, unable to form an answer. Gosh, Cedric was so sweet, he deserved so much better than her.

"Want to talk about it?"

Cass gulped, shaking her head softly. If only.

She missed Connor so bad it hurt. Maybe if he was here, maybe if they hadn't fought, maybe if that part of her life was still intact, she'd be at least a little okay. He always knew how to make her feel better, how to make her laugh when she was crying. It wasn't fair that he hated her, when she would've done anything for him.

"I hate magic." She confessed after several moments of silence, a tear running down her cheek that she swiftly wiped away with the palm of her hand. "I wish I was a muggle."

It was the truth. Magic was her lifelong burden, instead of the gift so many witches and wizards considered it to be. If magic didn't exist, or at least wasn't in her life, her brother would be dead, Connor would be her friend, and everything would be back to normal. She wouldn't be receiving scary birthday notes, she wouldn't be heartbroken over her best friend, she wouldn't want to drown herself in a toilet if she was a normal, average muggle.

She expected Cedric to laugh, to make fun of her or spread some elitist bullshit - he was a pureblood, after all. But he didn't.

Instead, he put a gentle arm over her shoulder, pulling her body close to his, his warmth filling her like a fireplace after a day outside in the cold. If her heart had been racing before, that was nothing compared to now. Cedric's touch was electrifying.

"I'm sorry. This probably isn't how you wanted to spend your evening."

He gave her a funny look. "It's your birthday. I'll always spend it with you, even if it's in a gross bathroom."

"My bathroom is not gross!" Myrtle shrieked.

Cass snorted. "I think I have bad luck for birthdays."

It was Cedric's turn to laugh. "You really seem like you do."

"I...was hoping for a letter, from someone back home. My friend Connor. We got into a huge fight over break, but I'd hoped he'd reconsider. But no."

"What was the fight about?"

"He's a muggle, and he found out about magic. Figured out that I'd been lying to him for our entire friendship over something I don't even want. I want to be a muggle. Then I'd have Connor back."

Cedric paused, very clearly thinking deeply about this. "I'd be pretty bummed if you were a muggle. You're the only thing that makes Potions with Snape tolerable."

"George is pretty fun too. You'd get along fine without me."

"Maybe." He shrugged. "You fancy him, then?"

She blinked, caught completely off guard. "Fancy George? No way."

"Really? It seemed like it."

"That's...odd. Well, I don't." Cass and George ending up together was as likely as...well, she was going to say Barty rising from the dead, but that was no longer the most outlandish thing she could think of. As likely as Connor forgiving her, then, since it seemed like that would never happen.

"Do you fancy Cho?" She countered when Cedric didn't say anything.

He stared at her, bemused. "Cho Chang? No, we're just good friends. From Quidditch, you know. Why would you think I fancy her?"

"Why would you think I fancy George?"

"Touché."

After her conversation with Cedric, her feelings for him increased by a tenfold. It was certainly frustrating, the last thing she needed with everything going on in her life was an unrequited crush. That conversation though...he cared who she fancied! But that couldn't possibly mean anything. Especially because he assumed she fancied George. As if.

It was late April when Cass finally found an opportunity to strike with the Ass Tonic 2.0. After her conversation with Cedric, there was no way in hell she was going to use it on him. He was too handsome to be turned into a donkey. So Cass decided a different target was needed - and she knew the perfect one.

"Hello lads." She sat down next to George at the Gryffindor table, Henry right behind her. His long black hair was pulled back into a bun, suiting his face shape well. Theodore was staring at them from across the Great Hall, but when Henry met his brother's gaze, he quickly looked away.

"Lads? That's a new one." Fred stared at her with an amused grin, across the table.

She shrugged. "I like trying new things."

"Is that why you're sitting at the Gryffindor table? I've never seen you away from your Ravenclaw Lady League." George said.

"Hey, if only you two can call Crouch Cassie, only I can call her posse the Lady League." Henry folded his arms across his chest, sitting down in between Cass and Lee Jordan.

"Fair enough." George shrugged.

"I'm here to make sure Bethany doesn't poison Colin." Cass lied swiftly, glancing down the table, where Bethany sat with her 'boyfriend'. It was a fair enough excuse, who knew what Bethany would do to that poor boy once she ran out of a use for him?

"Do you think she would?" George stared at the pair, biting his lip in what was either anxiety or amusement. When his eyes travelled away, and she was sure he wouldn't see, Cass slipped a tiny drop from a vial into his drink, quick enough that no one seemed to notice. No one but Henry, at least, who gave her a knowing smirk. Of course, he'd been in on it. Henry was perhaps one of the only people at this school she knew she could trust.

"I'm not sure, but I'm not taking any chances. It's weird that she's sitting over here, usually she sits with the Slytherins."

"She's probably avoiding Travis." Fred snorted.

"His name is Theodore. For fucks sake, it isn't that hard of a name to remember!" Cass ran a hand through her hair, as Henry stiffened, biting down on the side of his cheek.

"Potato potato."

"No, potato, Theodore."

"You're such a know-it-all, Cassie." Fred rolled his eyes, as George took a sip from his goblet, smiling ear to ear as he did.

Cass couldn't help but smile too, but surely not for the same reason. George didn't know that Ass Tonic 2.0 had been slipped into his pumpkin juice, or he certainly wouldn't be grinning as he was.

Just as he swallowed, a strange noise emitted from his throat, high pitched and foreign, unlike anything she'd ever heard. Like a hiccup, but if he was on heroin.

Another. Louder, this time.

Two tuffs of his bright red hair began to poke out from his head, like devil horns but grey, growing into massive donkey ears.

Cass didn't realise how quickly the potion would work, and watched smugly as George stared at her, his brown eyes wide.

He opened his mouth to speak, but all that came out was a loud "HONK", echoing through the Great Hall. Nearly all eyes were on them, the students staring in a mixture of amusement and confusion.

"Holy shit, Cassie." Fred, being one of the only people to understand what was going on, exclaimed between chortles.

"HONK"

"You're more badass than I gave you credit for, Crouch." Henry elbowed her as she tried to contain laughs of her own.

"I wouldn't call a simple prank badass, but I'll take the compliment nonetheless."

"HONK"

"Sorry George." She patted him on the shoulder, giving him a condescending smile as she eyed his grey donkey ears with amusement. "It's nothing personal."

"HONK"

George was grinning at her as he attempted to speak, the corners of his mouth curled up, as if just as amused by the situation as the rest of them.

Cass opened her mouth to speak again, but she didn't have a chance to say anything, before an echoing voice filled the Great Hall, far louder than George's braying. All eyes turned towards the end of the Gryffindor table, where a letter was suspended in front of Bethany, shouting in the voice of Cynric Burke, her uncle. A howler.

"BETHANY BURKE, YOU LITTLE SHIT, IF THE RUMORS ARE TRUE THAT YOU ARE ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH A MUDBLOOD, YOU WILL FACE THE CONSEQUENCES FROM ME. YOU HAVE LET DOWN YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY, YOU'RE LUCKY YOUR FATHER ISN'T HERE OR HE'D HAVE YOU HUNG BY YOUR NECK IN AN INSTANT. YOU HAVE A WEEK TO BREAK IT OFF WITH THE MUDBLOOD BEFORE I COME TO THE SCHOOL MYSELF AND WITHDRAW YOU! DO YOU HEAR ME? YOU'VE ALREADY LET US DOWN ENOUGH BY BEING IN RAVENCLAW, NOW THIS? I'M NOT AFRAID TO DISOWN YOU!"

The entire hall went silent.

As the letter ripped itself into shreds, Bethany simply sat there and stared at it with an unreadable expression. Dull, almost. Uninterested. Colin, who was next to her, on the other hand, looked more petrified with fear than he had last year, his nose twitching and his hands shaking.

"Well, what are you all looking at? Show's over." Bethany shouted, arms stretched out as she stood up from her table and marched out of the Great Hall, the massive door slamming shut behind her.

Cass glanced over at the Slytherin table, where Dahlia and Adelaide were watching with identical disapproving stares. Theodore and Ana both rose from where they sat with the Ravenclaws and raced out to follow her. It was impossible to tell which one was more worried, by the look on their faces.

"HONK"