there weren't many things you could find to distract yourself with in a room where you couldn't see nor hear anything but the indistinct murmur of conversation. 

trying to occupy his mind with thoughts to do with the colour black and how fascinatingly dark it was wasn't helping jeongguk much either. his head was starting to hurt at this point, thoughts and emotions practically destroying him from the inside as they swam around in a mad rushㅡrush to get where, to do what? all he needed was for them to settle down, for thirty goddamn minutes so he could get through this date alive, but apparently his own body had no mercy on him.

and oh, the guilt. it was clawing away at his insides, painfully reminding him of everything he didn't need on his mind at the present momentㅡhow he hadn't ran at jimin and screamed in his face that you don't understand, you're doing something to me you fucker! and hugged him and wished him luck back; had only looked away as well and almost dragged jaehyun into the dining area.

of course, it didn't help that every few seconds jaehyun would whisper from next to him with the same four words over and over againㅡ

"so you and jimin,"

"jaehyun i swear to jesus mary and joseph, i will personally escort you to the gates of hell if you start one more sentence with that."

"sir, if you'd just let me speakㅡ" jaehyun began desperatelyㅡif someone had interrupted jeongguk as many times as he'd interrupted jaehyun, he would have flipped and legitimately murdered, so he couldn't help but feel a tad impressed by jaehyun's stubbornness and patience when it came to the particular topic of so you and jimin. 

but impressed or not, "maybe i don't want to let you speak," jeongguk didn't have the time for this. "maybe i want silence to mull in my own sad thoughts, to question all my life decisions that brought me to this ugly point of which my mind has lost its sanity, its will to function properly, therefore i have lost my sanity and my will to function properly, and of course this all happens as i walk towards my first meeting with the girl i've liked sinceㅡ"

"sir, you're talking too much."

jeongguk's emotions flared even higher, "oh, i'm talking too much? the fucking nerve. are you paid to be this goddamn talkative, jaehyun? i think not, so how about youㅡ"

"excuse me, sir." jaehyun directed him slightly to the right, and jeongguk held in a growl, determined to feel annoyed at every little thing the waiter did. "i didn't mean to come off as rude with that, i only wanted to point out that you're a little ... jittery."

"i'm scared of the dark," jeongguk lied flatly, too tired to come up with a good excuse. "terrifies me. sometimes i wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, look around me for something domestic and comfortingㅡand all i see is never-ending blackness. it's truly horrifying jaehyun, the likes of you would never understand ㅡ"

"you're doing it again, sir," jaehyun pointed out delicately.

"yeah wellㅡjust shut up, jaehyun!"

"sir," jaehyun pleadedㅡjeongguk hissed in displeasure but didn't interrupt him for once. probably noticing this, jaehyun went on quickly, "i assumed that you and jimin would be discussing matters concerning the small... erm, mistake, and actions to be taken about that, butㅡ"

"believe me, my list of complaints for your manager is still very much there and it's only getting longer."

a nervous laugh. "you're so, haha, um, funny. my point isㅡyou seemed to be getting along almost ... well there, with him. hm."

"i'm sorry but," jeongguk had to look at what he assumed was jaehyun in the darkness to make his incredulity clear, "how is this your business again?"

"my apologies, i was just curious." if jeongguk had expected him to stop talking after that, boy was he wrong as jaehyun rushed on, "it's just strange considering that the two of you were thrown out of the restaurant the last time for parading around yelling at each other and now you'reㅡ"

"wow, thanks for that pleasant memory."

jaehyun allowed them to lapse into silence for a few seconds before inhaling sharply. "jungkook, sir. i feel like there's something i should tell you about jiminㅡ"

"funny. jimin said something along very similar lines himself," jeongguk mused humourlessly. "now here's the part where you, too, go, "this isn't the time, good luck on your date"!"

"it is actually very much the timeㅡwatch your step there, sirㅡand i was in fact talking aboutㅡ"

"look, can oh my fㅡ" jeongguk bit back a string of curses as his hip connected with the corner of a table. "caㅡcan you just do your job for now? that is, not getting me killed in this fucking warzone?"

jaehyun decided to stop walking about then and jeongguk was fully ready to throw a tantrum, twenty years of age or not. "sir, are you sure you're alright enough to do this? maybe another day would be moreㅡ"

"why does it even matter to you? jesus, jaehyun, please!" jeongguk was almost begging at this point, tugging on jaehyun's arm which adamantly remained in place.

giving up with a groan and resting his hands on his knees, jeongguk did a quick assessment of his injuriesㅡtoe stubbed on a table leg, ache in his hip and of course, his head pounding like a bitch. a waiter refusing to take him to his own reserved tableㅡthe hilarity of the situation was something only a third party could see because jeongguk was not finding it funny in the slightest.

"have we walked like, a mile?" jeongguk found himself complaining, bringing his body upright. "how big is this place?"

"oh, no, sir," jaehyun took ahold of jeongguk's arm and steered him forward, and jeongguk had to skip a couple times to fall into step with him. "i've just been taking you in circles for a while, for the sake of this conversation of courseㅡ"

"i see." if jeongguk had had any inhibitions about being too rude to jaehyun before, he most certainly didn't have any nowㅡhe was 100% prepared to drop-kick his waiter ass to another planet's restaurant. "like a little tour of the place, yeah? too bad that i can't see a goddamn thing!"

silence. he found himself feeling badㅡhad he hurt jaehyun's feelings? and since when had that even mattered to him? but then jaehyun spoke again and all feelings of remorse vanished in an instant, replaced by the familiar urge to get him in a headlock and beat the shit out of himㅡ"we apologize for the wait, ma'am, it was partially our fault that there was a holdㅡ"

"did you just fucking call me ma'am?" jeongguk exclaimed in disbelief, swinging an arm into the dark blindlyㅡhe obviously made contact with nothing but thin air. "i will literally take you right here, right now, you will wish you neverㅡokay you're seating me somewhere."

jeongguk wouldn't have minded a little warningㅡmaybe a few metres away jaehyun could have casually mentioned, almost there. instead, jeongguk was left to feel a sudden rush of blood to his face, out of both embarrassment and oh my god it's happening i'm not READY.

the pressure on his shoulders receded slowly and gently, but not before giving him a reassuring squeezeㅡjeongguk found himself missing the waiter already. wasn't something he'd usually do for a person who he barely knew and barely needed to know, and had only given him misery ... was he getting soft?

you're going to look back on all of this and laugh, he assured himself. how you got yourself all stressed out and confused and fucking soft for no reason, because in the end everything just went completely smoothly and all that headache was just ... pointless. you're going to wonder why you even bothered bringing jimin into this and getting him involved when you could've just let him go crazy in his own little world with namjoon and hoseok and what's-his-nameㅡ

jeongguk blinked twice. he could have, couldn't he? now that he thought about it, jimin had never really played a role in any of this. there was never a real necessity for him to pretend to be the other jimin when talking to namjoonㅡhe could've just told his buddies that there had been a mistake and been done with it. what could telling namjoon that he wasn't the same jimin possibly do? nothing.

park jimin was pointless.

and yet jeongguk's mind had insisted on making sure jimin was dragged into this messㅡjeongguk, who never did anything pointless. so jimin couldn't be pointless, could he? there had to be a reason he was in the middle of all thisㅡwhat?

what was the point of park jimin?

"it's okay," said shin jimin.

and he suddenly couldn't breathe.

her voice. it was so startlingly feminineㅡlooking back on his date with park jimin, he wanted to crawl into a hole right then and there for mistaking his voice for a female's. this was how females sounded, notㅡthat. the fact that his mother had a deeper voice than normal, and that his total number of interactions with people of the other sex was probably lingering in the single digits, could explain his inability to differentiate, but he would still gladly walk himself off a cliff for the mistake.

how had seokjin and jimin been so ... understanding? jeongguk himself would have howled with laughter if he'd been told of someone else making such an error; he was sure yoongi would have, too.

jeongguk shook his head quicklyㅡhe couldn't afford to be thinking of anyone or anything but the person right in front of him. he ran his tongue across his lips quickly before speaking, as carefully as he could.

"hi." not enough, say more! "jimin, um. wow. theㅡuh."

dragging his nails down his cheeks and opening his mouth in a silent scream, jeongguk resisted the urge to bang his head against the table. WHAT WAS THAT?

"it's okay," jimin repeated. jeongguk blinked, lowering his hands from his faceㅡshe'd neither called him out for his voice nor for his complete failure at forming a sentence. could it possibly be that he and namjoon sounded similar? at long last, a miracle. "i didn't think you were gonna show up, you know."

determined to do justice to the art of speaking this time around, jeongguk took a deep breath. "i'm so sorry, i got held up andㅡ" what had he told the other jimin? traffic? the excuse sounded pathetic now that he had to use it, so he discarded it from his mind. "i don't know how to make this up to you, jimin, i am so sorry."

"it's ... ah, whatever." though she was speaking in a low tone, the natural high-pitch of her voice still shone throughㅡdid all girls sound like that? he liked it. "i was shamelessly late the last time, so i shouldn't be a baby about it, right?"

"but see, i am ashamed," jeongguk said earnestly, leaning forward in his seat. "filled with the stuff, uh, shame. can't even bare to show my face to youㅡknew the blindfold would prove its use somehow."

jimin laughed a little laugh and jeongguk felt himself loosen, just a bit. it was what he'd always been good atㅡthe small, pathetic jokes that were hopelessly unfunny but there was something about him, seokjin had said, maybe the tone or the way he delivered his words, that put people at ease.

"have you eaten anything?" he asked, growing more confident by the second. it was going so wellㅡat this rate, his stupid plan could actually work.

"nah, i thought i'd wait." a pause. "drank through four glasses of water, though. might need a bathroom break soon." 

laugh or sympathize? jeongguk's mind raced. talking to girls was stressful, he realizedㅡone wrong move and he could potentially offend them without even being aware of it.

"i'm really sorry," he finally said, deciding on the safer route. "i shouldn't have kept you waiting like that when i was the one who asked youㅡ"

jimin interrupted him with a light 'psh'. "what are you talking about? if you hadn't asked me on this date, i would've asked you. except, you knowㅡnot here. gives me the creeps, to be honest."

"you should've told me if you didn't like this place."

"i did, silly." jeongguk almost slapped himselfㅡof course she would have told namjoon. "but since you really wanted toㅡfor god knows what reasonㅡhere i am! only this time we're going to see each other, right?"

jeongguk rose his glass to his lips and smiled. "yes, we are." 

you're going to see jeon jungkook, and after that everything will be okay.

"so what have you been up to?" he asked as casually as he could, taking a sip of water. 

a scoff. "if you'd bothered to send me a message these past few days, you'd knowㅡ" jeongguk set his glass down, about to protest, but jimin hurried on, "don't start apologizing again, i'm just joking! butㅡfor realㅡwhat have you been up to? i mean, you're the one who usually freaks out when i don't message you for even a day."

"um," jeongguk began, trying to keep himself from panicking. "there was thisㅡthing. uhㅡ"

"mhm...?"

"my dog was sick."

jeongguk bit down on his tongue, but too lateㅡthe words had spilled from his mouth before he could even process them through his brain and realize how absolutely moronic they sounded. 

"ah." jimin's tone was neutralㅡbetraying no emotion, no clue on whether she believed him or not. jeongguk wasn't sure whether that was good or bad. "i see." 

something odd set into the atmosphere, despite the fact that she'd spoken a completely casual statementㅡmaybe there had been a clue somewhere. or maybe he was just hungry. really, really hungry. jeongguk placed a hand over his stomach and breathed in and out, slowly.

almost as if on cue, a burst of hot air hit his face, telling him that food had arrived. recalling his i caught the waiter! stunt with the other jimin, jeongguk muffled a laugh into his hand and gave a polite nod in the general direction he assumed the person serving him was. that was wild, jesus.

not even taking a moment to sniff out the food on his plate, he forked up as much as he could and willed the feeling that everything was going wrong to disappear, stuffing his mouth with food and chewing. he tasted nothing.

don't panic. don't you panic, jeon jungkook. "howㅡhow is it?"

"it's okay." she was almost whispering. 

don't panic. don't panic.

"let's be honest," jeongguk stabbed a piece of food with his fork, readjusting his sweaty grip on it. "it tastes like crㅡ"

"i'm sorry."

there was a clattering of metal on porcelain. slowly, jeongguk looked up, fork halfway to his mouth.

don't assume anything, his mind willed him, don't say something stupid, jungkook, she could mean anything by thatㅡ

"why are you sorry?" he sounded practically robotic, but at least he'd said it.

"i can't do this any more."

she could mean anything ... by that.

jeongguk swallowed. began to ask can't do what? but jimin beat him to it.

"you're not namjoon."

and his world seemed to freeze.

the roomㅡthe pitch-black room of consistent darknessㅡfroze. jeongguk wondered if time had perhaps stopped in that instant too, allowing him to get ahold of his bearings, the situation he had gotten himself into.

he thought about it for a few seconds.

and he wasn't scared at all.

because jeongguk had considered this happening from the very startㅡconsidered it, feared it, dreaded itㅡbut as he'd sat down in his seat, had heard jimin speak, a tiny part of him had expected it.

how unrealistically he'd imagined this date to go, he realized now in amusement. he and namjoon were two completely different peopleㅡhe found it ridiculous that he'd believed for even a second that it could work.

maybe namjoon didn't have a dog. had a different sense of humour. maybe he really did have a different voice from jeongguk, and jimin had only tried to ignore itㅡuntil she couldn't take it any more.

of course, there was his stupid, stubborn mind to consider. had probably prevented him from realizing how screwed he was until this pointㅡif he'd realized it any sooner he'd never have come to this point. single-mindedness was no boonㅡit was a bane, through and through.

the thought streaked across his head before he could stop itㅡhe had an idiot brain to convince him it would work, so what had convinced jimin? had he ever been convinced? thinking back on it now, jeongguk doubted it.

jeongguk exhaled, testing how steady it came out. a strong, confident breathㅡas long as he remained calm and composed, he could come out of this alive and without his relationship with jimin damaged beyond repair.

i'm jeon jungkook and i'm sorryㅡit was on the very tip of his tongue. it shocked him how casually he was taking this, as if it didn't even matter when godㅡit mattered to him a lot. but as fully well he knew that this wasn't something that could be resolved easily, would take a whole lot of explaining and arguing and maybe even tears to get throughㅡhe had to start somewhere.

deciding to try a different approach that didn't involve revealing that he'd lied to her repeatedly, jeongguk breathed in, then out again, the exhale sounding a bit more strained than the previous time.

"jimin, there's something i need to explain to youㅡ"

it was at that moment that jeongguk realized something.

something with no explanation whatsoever, that sent chills down his spine because everything was very, very wrong, yet again, but this time in a completely different sense because he'd messed up, big time, and he was only realizing it now.

it was that he'd stupidly, so stupidly booked the table for jeon jungkook and shin jimin. not kim namjoon and shin jiminㅡjeon jungkook.

so how had the waiters known to lead jimin to his table, not namjoon's? how were they not reliving the exact thing they'd gone through the last time? jimin had arrived first, had probably announced herself having booked a table with namjoon and her; should have been led to namjoon's table. then jimin and him had arrivedㅡand each of them would have respectively been led toㅡ

nowhere, because shin jimin would already have been at namjoon's table, and the restaurant couldn't possibly make the error of surnames all over again, could it? and thus everything should have ended in complete shambles,

yet here she was.

if jeongguk had had more time to mull over this new-found revelation, maybe he'd have taken her reply in a less jolting sense. because despite the fact that they would only baffle him further, they at least explained the above confusion.

but jeongguk didn't have any time, and this time he was sure that everything truly did freezeㅡthe rotation of earth, time, himselfㅡwhen jimin's words struck home.

"there's nothing you need to explain to me, jeongguk."