It must be early morning when I cannot stay asleep any longer and I fall into a shallow slumber. My ear twitches and I jerk awake, drawing in a huge breath. My heart is beating at a million miles an hour and I can feel a thin sheen of sweat coating my fur. I close my eyes, trying to calm my racing hears and my heaving lungs. "A-Arrow?" A small voice murmurs.

"Who- oh, hey, Hawk. How are you doing?"

"I could ask you the same question." Hawk smiles.

"You could." I reply, chuckling.

"So?"

"I'm doing alright. How about you?"

"I'm doing alright as well. I have this really weird feeling, you know? I just don't quite think you're answering my question completely honestly... You're panting, you're sweating, and you look like you just saw a ghost." Hawk tilts his head to the side, frowning.

"I, uh, had a nightmare." How am I supposed to tell him that it's the Wasteland battle this evening? I'm the number one Gladiator, I can't just say that I can no longer kill anyone, that it's killing me, that for over half my life I've been murdering and it's finally taking its toll. How do you say that?

"How do you say what?" Hawk looks at me, confused.

"Huh?"

"You whispered that." Hawk frowns and cocks his head to the side.

"I- er..." My voice trails off.

"Should I not have heard what you whispered to yourself?"

"You don't know anything except for 'how do you say that' so I think I'm good." I can't let anything like this happen again.

"Well, about that... You sort of quietly murmured everything." Hawk shifts on his paws and winces. I'm on him in an instant, pinning him to the wall of my cave and shoving my face in front of his. My teeth drip saliva onto his cheeks and muzzle. Fire burns in my eyes. "If you tell anyone this, I will torture you at each and every chance I get. The exact same as when I told you about top Gladiators. You understand?"

"Yeah, can I ask a question?"

"Depends on what it is." I reply slowly.

"What did you mean when you said 'it's finally taking its toll'?" Hawk tilts his head to the side, his eyes calm. I freeze. I can't speak. I can't say anything. I can't tell anyone. I'm trapped. What if a guard finds out? I could be killed. They could turn me to one of the berserk Gladiators. That can't happen. I open my mouth to speak. Hawk sees my response. "You don't have to speak. I'm here for you though. Jay is too. He'd kill me if I didn't help you. He really looks up to you, Arrow. We've seen the videos of you fighting; they're everywhere so everyone watches. I don't know if everyone sees this, but we've seen how you only fight those who attack first and how you refuse to kill anyone who surrenders. You cover it up so well with a few smooth words. I really admire that about you, Arrow. If you don't want to talk, I won't push you. But, please, remember, I'm here for you."

"O-ok. It's just... It's just that I can't kill anymore." I can't keep this secret for any longer. Sure, I've just met these two Gladiators but for some reason, I know they're not going to hurt me. I've tried to keep in all this, but I can't keep it down any longer.
"Alright, I'm not sure that I follow. You can't kill or you won't."

"Both. There's so much blood on my h-paws. I don't even want to know half of those I've killed. There's too many to count in a thousand lifetimes. All those I've killed haunt my dreams. I see them every day. You know how hard that is? Seeing the faces you kill every day? They think I like winning. That I like the points and bathe in the glory of winning. That I look forward to it and train endlessly to hone my skills or something. I don't. I hate it. I train to try to get my mind off the fact that I've murdered. I can't kill the Clicks so I don't think twice about it. The Wasteland guards treat me differently. Fawn over me, treat insignificant wounds while letting others suffer, this one guard made me a really nice meal since I killed Tremor in record time. He's nice but I don't need that. I never use the points. Sure, I'm going to get a new set of armor but for the next however many years I'm here, I won't use any. This whole thing is just so, so, so messed up." My sides tremble as I whimper, silent tears rolling from my cheeks. Hawk doesn't say anything or react.

"You could escape." He whispers after a few minutes.

"What? It's impossible."

"What if that's just what the guards want you to think?"

"When you see the Wasteland arena, you'll see. You. Can't. Escape. You'll see that I'm right. Once the Wasteland's got you, there's no way out." I reply sharply. My voice is a blade.

"Arrow. Please, you have to at least try. Jay and I can help. You can't stay here. You're about to break."

"It's miles and miles of absolutely nothing..."

"Jay and I will be with you every single step of the way."

"And if I say yes?"

"All you'll have to do is get a big wound from someone and pretend to be dead. Jay and I will do the rest." Hawk speaks calmly.

"I-I can't do it. Where will I go?"

"Arrow, don't forget this one little thing." Hawk's orange-brown eyes gaze straight into mine.

"W-What?"

"Jay and I just arrived; we know where everything is. We still have a home albeit a small one. You won't get lost and we'll all make it, I promise." My mind is spinning. There's so much going on. Too much going on. I close my eyes and try to calm the thoughts whirling around my head.

But the more I think about it, the more I see that Hawk is right. I have to get out of here. I already knew that the Wasteland was taking it's toll. I can't take much more of this. "A-alright, I'll do it. I can't stay here." I stare at the ground, taking shaky breaths.

"I think it's the right thing to do. Jay and I will be right by your side, we won't leave you."

"Thanks, Hawk." I roll to my side.

"I can't just let you crumble from this messed up place. Also, apart from the fact that I want to help and that it's the right thing to do, Jay would never forgive me. He really loves you, Arrow. You've been his hero his whole life. I really appreciate that."

"Thanks." I exhale loudly.

"Anyways, Jay's feeling a bit better. He's up and moving, Breakfast starts in about five minutes."

"Oh, jeez. We'd better get going unless we want the practically charred bits of food. I know a place where we can train and not catch as much attention. The Armory isn't very busy and there's a few fighting pads there."

"No! We can't fight the Clicks again, Arrow! Are you insane? Do you remember what happened to Jay yesterday? He almost died. I'm not fighting another one of those monsters." Something inside me snaps at Hawk's words.

"Don't you dare accuse me of being insane." I snarl and shove Hawk to the ground. I press my claws against his throat as my lips pull back into a snarl. Saliva hands on threads from my jaws and I glare daggers at the shaggy dog. My whole body trembles with virulent fury. I press my claws a little harder into Hawk's throat. Small beads of blood rise around my claws and drip off the orange-eyed dog's fur. "Arrow, Arrow, please. You don't want to do this."

"Why shouldn't I? I'm not insane."

"This isn't you speaking! The Arrow I know is kind and generous, he's made the most of his situation. The Arrow I know has found loopholes in the rules; he only fights those who attack him first, he doesn't kill if the opponent surrenders or begs for mercy, and he doesn't let other Gladiators suffer. He also follows the rules." Hawk whispers the last sentence.

"Well, what if that Arrow you knew was gone? What if the Wasteland's changed him so much that he's no longer here? What if he's too far gone to come back?"

"Arrow, you're not gone. You're still right here. But if you want to kill me, then do it. I surrender." Hawk lays back on the ground, relaxing completely. He tilts his head back, revealing his throat.

"I believe that was your last mistake." I snarl. The sound echoes in my throat for a moment before I lunge.

Thank you for reading! It's the end of the school year so it's pretty busy but I'll keep updating. Please consider a vote and feel free to comment! 

What's going to happen during the Wasteland battle? 

Are Jay, Hawk, and Arrow going to run? 

Are they going to make it? 

Is Arrow going to kill Hawk? 

Is he really gone; the Wasteland finally broke him?

-Werewolf14-