February goes as fast as January does, which means I've been four months in the Dream House. Four months since the accident, since I almost died. It's hard to think it's been so long since then when it feels it just happened last week.

So much has changed, I myself feel like a different person. Perhaps the Blanca I was before indeed died that day in that car, and a new one was the one who escaped before it blew up. When I look back at the person I used to be I can understand why Will thought I was a monster. For someone who could only see what I projected, I could only look like a spoiled brat who did nothing but pretend to care by doing to charities that were just fancy parties for rich people who wanted to look like philanthropies. I looked like someone who didn't know or care about other's suffering because I had it all. That was the kind of life I showed, even if it wasn't exactly like that.

When I go back, people will talk so much about me. The missing heiress who come back from the dead. Then all the corruption hidden in BEEB Group will be revealed, Laura's true intentions and her doing to get me killed. People will be so happy to have so much to gossip about, won't they?

Usually, I wonder how I'm supposed to go back to that kind of life, where I'll have it all or the power to have it all, where I stop being just a girl with no memories of her past, even if I barely care about that and just live normally right now. How do I go back to an empty house after spending all this time with so many kids around? There's no Dad, just Laura in our house and I'm planning she'll never set a foot inside again. Nora has her family, but I have no one at home. My mother would never come here with me, she couldn't do it before, she won't be able now.

It is no surprise I'm reluctant to go back to such solitude and silence when it's so warm and joyfully noisy in here. I won't hear the kids running back inside after a day of school, chatting loudly and getting excited to be home again. I won't hear their stories of their days at school at the dinning table. I won't have anyone to play outside on the weekends, chasing pigs or feeding the goats. I won't be in a room where even after I wake up from nightmares, the even breathings of the girls around me can calm me down and remind me I'm safe.

I'll be all alone.

That thought alone is so terrifying and suffocating. Loneliness didn't bother me before, but now... after I've been surrounded by so many people, it scares me. I dread it.

Even if I'm scared to go back, even if I don't want to be alone, I don't have much time left. My birthday is coming, at the end of April, which means I have two months left at best. If nothing happens before that day, that's when I go back.

Two months until this lifestyle ends and I go back to my reality.

Nora is aware of my struggles and fears, my reluctance to leave this place, so she's doing her best to keep me cheerful and creating memories with everyone. I'm sure she's even talked to Will so I'm not alone, because if I wander alone I get lost in thoughts, fears consume me and it's too painful.

That is why the first weekend the weather is nice, we go for our hiking experience. Will is going to be our guide and we're supposed to camp there for the night. He says there's this lovely place we need to see before we leave. So we take the van on Saturday morning and head as close to the forest as we can get before getting all our things and start the route.

Will insisted we needed to take the drone with us so it could record our trip, so I'm the one wearing the smart watch that makes the drone follow us from above, and like that we head into the forest that doesn't look like many people come in.

Even if our path is difficult and we have to make our way between trees, and rocks while going up the hill, it's a wonderful experience. The air is so fresh and clean, it smells like rain, and it just feels so earthly, even if my muscles burn from the strain that it is hiking, even if my lungs want even more air, I'm enjoying this. The scenery is beautiful, with tall trees, covered in green leaves that aware waiting for spring to arrive anytime now, rocks that are half my size, the sound of animals living their lives peacefully in the shelter of that forest.

It's in the middle of the afternoon when we make it to this clear Will knows, with a big river that creates the most wonderful background noise, soothing and appealing. The place is open and even if the ground is uneven, I can see we can camp here. But before we settle down, we do eat something because we skipped lunch to make our way here, and once that's done we can put our things down and start our camping experience now. Will tells us the story of how he found this place one day when he was younger and liked to come here, mostly because it felt untouched by mankind and he felt the peaceful life of animals around him, embracing him. I understand him, it feels like that when you close your eyes and you just listen.

Birds chirping, ruffling of leaves, the stream of water against the rocks, with little splatters here and there. There's so much noise around, insects, different type of birds and who knows what else, but it all echoes in a perfect and natural harmony.

In this place, with clouds partly blocking the sun, the orchestra of nature playing endlessly around us, the fresh air of what feels like a mountain but it's just a hill, all my worries and fears feel insignificant. I can understand better now Jane Austen's quote: What are men compared to rocks and trees?

"Isn't this place just so nice?" I mumble while we sit by the fire with Nora. Will's gone to get more firewood for later and even if we offered to go with him, he told us to just wait here.

"I particularly like the sound of the river," she comments, smiling softly as she closes her eyes just to listen to it.

"We should come here again before leaving," I say, relaxing on the blanket we've put on the ground.

"Most definitely. By the way, I talked to Mum, she says we should go back at least one week before your birthday and show up on that day. It seems Laura is planning something, a kind of even for that day, so it's a good way to make an entrance and reveal you are not dead," Nora explains as I heave a tired sigh.

"Has she managed to find the evidence?" I inquire, taking deep breaths because that means in less that two months I have to go back.

"No. If she had we'd be there already. There are clues and suspicions, but nothing definite that can actually be used in a trial." Nora sighs, probably as overcome as I feel with this sense of helplessness.

"It's going to be total chaos when we go back, isn't it?" Nora hums her agreement and I picture that moment when I'm back and hell breaks loose. People asking who was that girl who was supposed to be me, the body they buried as me. People asking where I've been all this time and why I didn't show up before. People demanding to know what happened to me and why I was declared dead when I'm clearly alive.

When I think of all that I want to stay in this forest forever.

I feel Nora's hand taking mine, squeezing it gently in a comforting gesture. "I'll stand by your side, you don't have to worry," she whispers, so I turn my head to watch her lying next to me, always close, always stable. She's the grounding presence in my life and I know that if I didn't have her, I'd probably stay here forever and never come back, hiding like a coward.

"You always get so mushy when I'm not around, I feel like I'm the one third wheeling," another voice joins us then and when I look up, I find Will standing by our heads, his shadow all over us like one of the trees in the forest.

"You thought I was the third wheel? It's been always you," Nora shoots back, making me laugh at Will's aghast expression. "And now that you're back, Blanca, come with me."

"Where?" I ask, still following her back on my feet.

"I feel the call of nature," she replies and I chuckle while she takes my hand again and leads me away from Will and the clear, back into the woods. "You don't think there are wild boars here?" she asks me as we continue walking, looking nervously around.

"I don't know, so let's not get too far so we can run back to the campsite. If we hear something, let's climb a tree, though," I suggest and Nora nods.

Once we find a good spot, she finally releases my hand and I stand there, as a bodyguard keeping an eye in the surroundings so my best friend's dignity is left intact. However, I get a bit distracted, paying attention to all the sounds and rustling around me. I feel like I'm being watched, which makes me imagine all the animals taking secretive glimpses at us, staring with curiosity in their eyes for these weird creatures in their home. I've had this feeling in the back of my neck the whole day.

I hear footsteps coming that belong to something big, but they are slow, not like a boar charging against us. "Guillermo, is that you?" I ask out loud, thinking maybe he followed us, worried we're taking so long. "Guillermo?" I insist, a bit louder as the steps get closer but no response comes.

I start getting nervous. We're supposed to be the only people here, right? Is Will trying to scare us?

"It's not funny, Guillermo! Don't try to scare me," I call loud, but no answer comes. I turn in many directions, because I can't pinpoint exactly where the footsteps are coming from, my hands begin to shake in anxiety and nervousness.

Then it's quiet. Dead quiet as if everything has frozen around me but my heartbeat is furious, it races like it's never done before and my throat closes up, I can barely whisper "Will?" when something charges against me, a fast and blurry silhouette. I can barely see it coming, it's a tall and built figure, completely black, moving like a shadow from hell. I scream but soon there's red cloth against my mouth and nose., keeping me from screaming.

It's a man, attacking me.

I struggle, kicking and wanting to scream, my nails clawing the flesh of the forearm holding the cloth against my mouth. The other hand is at the back of my head, holding it in place while I feel my body becoming heavier, unresponsive.

I try to focus, to see the person in front of me but my head is already spinning and it's hard, yet I see familiar features. A face I haven't seen in so long but that was constant in my life prior the accident.

Dean.

Dean is here, attacking me once again. My eyes fill with tears as my struggle becomes weaker, until I can barely move my body at all, my vision becomes blurry. I still can see him and I fight to keep my eyes open, but he increases the pressure of the cloth against my face, the smell so strong it makes me dizzy.

"Blanca?" someone calls, a distant faint voice I think it belongs to Nora.

"Shit!" Dean curses and before I lose consciousness, he throws me over his shoulder and turns around, running away. I feel like my body doesn't belong to me, I can't even lift my arm and all I see it's a blurry mix of green and brown while my body bounces against Dean's back.

He keeps running and the green and brown blurry landscape turns completely black at times. I want to make my head focus, to think of something to stop this. I want to scream but nothing comes out, I can't even part my lips.

I'm being taken away and I can't do anything to stop this, I can't even keep my eyes open. The black shadows creep in my vision, consuming what little I can see, until there's only blackness and nothing else.

Little streams of light come at times, but I'm too weak to open my eyes and see what's happening, I'm consumed by this unbeatable sense of lethargy so I can only surrender, I hear the running of an engine, the ground vibrates under me, but I can't open my eyes yet.

I don't know when Dean pulled me off his shoulder and got me in a moving car. I do my best to stay awake and not fall asleep again, but it's so hard. My eyelids are so heavy, my body feels made of lead and I just want to give up completely, but I don't.

Slowly, painfully, I blink. And blink again, willing my eyes to focus and see exactly what's happening.

I see Dean again, driving, but he's not alone, there's someone else with him in the car, in the passenger's seat, listening to him. I blink again, and again, trying to hard to focus. I can see long blonde hair, and the silhouette of a woman, but I can't recognise her.

It is so stuffy in my head.

Until she turns around to take a look at me and I can finally see her face.

Laura is here.

"Oh, dear," she whispers in her soft and velvety voice, a condescending smile on her lips as she watches me with pitiful eyes. "She's awake."

❅ ❅ ❅

*puppy eyes* Eeh-he! It couldn't be fluff and cuteness forever, right? I didn't write this yesterday because I was in a bad mood. 

Anyhow, it's time to bring murder! :D By the way, I warn you that there will be special chapters to cover these upcoming events, so don't get alarmed. I just can't keep Blanca's POV for the entirety of the book so I need to deal with that. Now real out why I can't keep her POV. You're welcome :D

Dedication to REDDISHTONKS your love for Charlie is appreciated :D

Bel, xx

~updates Mondays and Fridays~