Hello Beautiful People!

How are you all?

The place in Europe that I am located at is once again under the grasp of Covid variants.
It is again turning scary here. More and More new positive cases are registered.

I want you all to take care of yourselves no matter if your area has surging cases or not the official report suggests that there will be another wave hitting the globe.

So please don't forget that the virus still exists and take all necessary precautions....even if does not look important at the moment!

Because, Precaution is the Cure!

Now, let's talk about the chapter!
Today, it is going to be All about Nakul....as I think it's high time we saw another glimpse at what is going on with this Caveman!

Why is he behaving so inconsiderate?

What is the back up story behind his cold behaviour?

I hope you all will relate the chapter with his recent behaviour.
Also, I will also give Bela's point of View!

And a request, please read with an open mind!

So, without any further delay, let's just dig in!

7th August

Nakul's pov

Dear All, can you please tell me what the fuck is going on with my Life????

Why am I so Fucked up with my situation!?!

Why am I not able to control my anger issues and my insecurities around my wife?

One suspicious action of her and I am travelling back to my Past experience!

My insecurities just rush back to me like a tornado!
The more I try to run from my Past, it bounce back to me again with more Force!

Bela is not the culprit, I know!

Yet, she is just being the receipent of my fucked up life!

The tears, the Pain I am giving her is not for her it is rather for my satisfaction!

The boy who had been harrassed by a wicked woman For such pleasures, he wants to hurt a woman Back in return!
An Innocent boy who was forced to see the deceitful sight of his own mother wants to avoid any such situation in his life!

And that is why I want to control everything!

And Bela is the easy Target!

He wants to take pleasure in her pain!
He wants to control her and dominate her!

But trust me it is not the Case!

I did not get any amount of satisfaction when I humiliated her today!

Rather I felt her Pain!
Her Helplessness!
I felt that she was trapped in my sinister ways!

And Somehow I could see my own sufferings in Her!

And I wonder if I have turned just like HER????
(His tormentor)

She felt pleasure in my Pain and my harrassment and I am seeking the same from Bela!

Heck, I don't want to be Her!

I don't want Bela to suffer the same!

Then why am I inflicting pain on her?
Am I going crazy?

I don't know, I thought I had recovered after all the treatments but one look at Bela and I turn Toxic!

And tonight, I crossed my limits!

I sexually harrassed my own wife!
I tarnished her dignity with the same hands that are supposed to protect her!

I exploited my own Marriage!

Her tears, her pleadings, her hesitation, her pain was reaching my ears and my senses but I ignored them just the same way, mine were back in olden days!

And by the time I realised what I was doing it was too late!
I had already done the horrible damage!

And then I Left Her!
Not because I did not want to be with her but because I could not stand there and she my helpless teen self in her!

I feel so Toxic in myself!

And now here i am like always, at the Bar, drowning myself in alcohol!

Trying really hard to forget her tearful, helpless face!

A part of me, the Husband part of me wanted to be there for her, ask for her forgiveness, but the dead human part of me wanted to run away from the situation!

If only I had the courage to Face her!

It has always been like this!
The Nakul Mahendra Trehan, who is known for masculine power and dominance in the outer world, has always been the one to run away from facing his own humiliation!

And looking at Bela seemed exactly the same!
She looked exactly like my helpless teen self and I could not face him not in front of Bela!

It is not like that, that I don't want to discuss things with her about my past but I am too scared to be vulnerable and helpless!

I do not want to show my weak side to her!
She would not like that Nakul!

Nobody Ever fucking Did!

But I know if I want her by side, I need to open up to her about my past!

But I am afraid if she will ever look at me with the same respect she looked at me in these past couple of days after knowing my deep secrets.

She will hate me for being a spineless man!

She will despise me for being so helpless!

She will not like the vulnerable me, the scared Nakul, who could protect himself!

She will see the worthless me And may be then she will also run away from me, just like my Mother!

(If you are wondering my dear readers, I am going to elaborate more on Nakul's mother in upcoming chapters, for now know that it was not a pleasant childhood experience for him.)

No!

I can't let Bela leave me!

I can not be not beside her!

I want her to myself, Forever!!!

And screw me, I need to fix things with her!

And I knew I had to reach out to her!

Yes, I have to!

Bela, my wife, I screw up always!
But, I am coming for you!!!!
I promise, I will fix things between us!

I am not going to be a Coward, not anymore!!!

Restless, I drove to the Mansion and reached out to our room and then her magnificent scent took over me, calming ny nerves, there she was!

My Beautiful Wife!

Crawled up in our bed, like a baby foetus, dry tears visible on her angelic face, her constant shaking fragile body, had me worried and i rushed to her.

Her forehead was filled with sweat beads....and words failed to come out of her trembling lips. My eyes travelled to her body once again and I frowned, she was still in that torn piece of cloth that I had seen on her last time.

The blue and purple marks, on her body at various spots, gifted by me, made me shut my eyes in shame!

What have I Done???
Please Bela, please forgive me!?! - a whisper left my lips

But Alas I could not say that out loud to her!

Sighing at my stubbornness, I then, very carefully tried to change her into a comfortable cotton shirt of mine, and she shivered and cried a few words that had me feel disgusted in me yet again!

She had yet again pleaded -

N...Nakul...don't do this to me!
Do not force it...it hurts!!!

It did not take me any seconds to realise that She was having a nightmare about my cruel actions!
But what could I do now, I could not undo what I had done but yes, I could provide her with comfort and care now!

Sucking in a deep breath, I caressed her creased forehead softly and then like a magnet to her fragility and innocence, I scooped her upto me and held her in my arms for the first time, and surrendered myself to my wife, promising both of us to make things right between us, starting Tomorrow Morning!

I kissed her forehead and promised myself that I will apologise to her and I will take whatever punishments she would want to for.!

Yes, whatever punishment she would decide, I will leave that to Bela!

Bela's pov

Trapped!

I feel trapped....i feel like I am in a cage!
I tried to free myself but nothing seem to work, rather I felt a strong pull on my waist.

Groaning in pain, I forced open my eyes and my inner self screamed!

Nakul was here!

That monster was here, yet again....and the fuck he dared to hold me in my unconscious state.!

The memories from the night came rushing back to me and I felt my skin burning....i wiggled to come out of his sinful arms and thats when his lost green orbs met mines.
No one spoke for a few seconds but then I heard him whisper -

B..Bela...yo..you are ok, right!?!

The fucking nerve of him!!!!

How could he act all so caring after he did all those horrible things to me last night!?!

He is so Toxic!
And I would rather choose to die than to accept his fake care!

Like a wounded tigeress, I gritted my teeth and pushed him away as far as possible from me.
And he looked shocked for a while and may be Hurt????

But I might be wrong because, monsters like him do not feel any kind of pain for others!

I saw him attempting to bring his arm close to me again but before he could reach me with his filthy hands, I yelled -

How Dare you come close to me!?!
After the heinous things that you did to me last night, you had the nerve to hold me as if you cared???

And I swear to God Mr. Trehan, if you forward you arm even one more inch, i am going to chop them off with my surgical scissors!

Be... I.. I want to say something to me, about my behaviour last night? - he spoke nervously

I don't Care what the heck you have to say to me....go Die!
I don't Care! - I replied not even giving a second thought and rushed to the bathroom with a lightening speed

And then slumped down on the back of the door and then I cried!

Yes, I fricking Cried!

Cried a molested Kid!

Cried like my teen age self, once again!

As fate was once again playing with my innocence!

The difference is, that time it was my Father and now it is my Husband!

Why won't the men let me be?

Am I that bad that all they want to do with me is to torment me, Always something Humiliating???

But it's is good that i am crying and cursing over my ill fate inside the walls of this washroom, after all who wants to die and crumble in front of that monster?

I am never ever going to give him that satisfaction!

With this thought in my mind I prepared myself for the rest of the day!

And I don't give a damn what so ever that Monster has to say!

Not Anymore!

Writer's pov

Hey guys, Finally it's me!

Let's see what is m about to witness between these two!

Nakul was not surprised to see an angry Bela as he was expecting this kind of behaviour.
But it took every ounce in the dominating himself not to snap at Bela and take her insult without any firing.

He knew he did wrong to her and this time he wanted to talk things out between them, may be not all of his secrets but may be some of them, so that Bela can understand his insecurities.

Keeping His eyes focused on the washroom and thinking of ways to talk to his wife, he sighed when he was interrupted by his business calls.

Being the sole responsible for the entire Trehan Empire, his life was no easy but Nakul knew he could not burden his younger ones with the business worries as they all were going through a happy phase of their lives.
And Nakul was anything but he would not bother his loved ones for something as petty as business stress.

He knew he was capable enough to handle things on his own!

But right now, he was Frustrated too!

As his own life was screwed up!

Anyways, he was informed about the urgency of Israel deal again by his PA, and he cursed bad as he had to leave for a couple of days to attend the conference.

He tried contacting his lost friend, Ishaan Malhotra but he was still being a Jerk anyway and thus Nakul had to take up the charge!

Things were not great he knew, but may be he had a hope that he could talk things out with Bela before leaving.

He did not want to leave things unfinished on a bad note.!

And thus, he began to start with his day as well.

When he reached the dinning table, he found everyone sitting and chatting  together as If nothing was out of place in their lives, but in this he could make out one particular person who was trying hard to behave normally, His Wife!

Bela was trying hard to not show her vulnerable side to her people, just to make them happy!

Another mastered quality of his Wife!

She always put everyone's comfort before hers.

Nakul sat on his usual stop, greeting everyone, however he frowned when instead of a particular homely cooked breakfast, their staff served regular boring breakfast, something he used to eat before he got married to Bela.

And reading his mind, Avyan whined like a child -

What is This???
Are we back to these boring English breakfast???
I don't like this!

Suhani too pouted looking at Bela and spoke -

Me too Hubby!
I want something spicy and Desi, especially made by my di!

Exactly my thoughts Suhani, even I am used to eating teh breakfast made by Bha... I mean Bela! - chirped Drishti

Bela fidgeted with her plate and spoke - Sorry Guys!
I w..was late today, did not feel like cooking!
But, if you guys don't like these items, I will go cook something for you guys quickly!

She was just about about to get up from her seat when Nakul interrupted holding her arm -

No need!
I... I mean this breakfast is fine Bela....now that it is ready and served, let's not waste this.!
Besides, you are not obliged to cook every morning for us!

Avyan, Suhani, Drishti, please continue with your breakfast and if not, you can ask the chef to make something for you guys!
Bela, here is tired!
She will cook some other time, so let her Be!

Hearing him speak like that, Bela's eyes widened and the younger couple hooted in a teasing way whereas Avinash kept a straight face, not liking the little display of concern for Bela.

Bela sat back and everyone started with their breakfast with some light talks in between but Nakul had all his focus on his wife who was just playing with her meal. And then he frowned when he noticed how Bela was controlling her throat and mouth movement. She was unusually uneasy with the food in her plate.

Suhani pointed out - Di, try this Sandwich, it's good!
Well, not as good as yours but this will do!

Bela meekly nodded and as soon as she tried to eat when suhani tried to feed her, she felt a strong urge to puke her guts out and Nakul became alert.
Bela placed her plam over her mouth to prevent the vomit and something striked Nakul's mind.

The scene from yesterday night!

The way he had shoved himself in her mouth, and he knew she hated that!
It did not take him a second to realise that Bela was once again living that scene and thus she was not able to swallow the food, probably because the way he had humiliated her with his actions last night.

Everyone panicked and tried to reach out to Bela asking questions, showing their worry and then Nakul screamed -

Leave her Alone Guys!
Everyone stay in the table, I will take care of her!

With that Bela literally rushed out with him, taking the situation in, she hated to be with Nakul but at this moment she did not care!

She could not hold back the bile, anyways!

Once reaching their room, Bela literally pushed him away and vomited her guts out in the bathroom, and Nakul watched her in a guilt.

He knew what was going on!

He knew the feeling of Humiliation!

He had been through that too!

And he knew what exactly was going on with Bela, she was reminded of his inhumane actions and he felt numb.

He knew that he had affected Bela but he did not know The impact of the damage done by him until now!

Once done, Bela realised that Nakul was watching her with a blank look on his and he was patting her back.

And that triggered something Inside her!

She had enough of his Bipolars!

Jerking Nakul away with her full force, Bela screamed -

Get your hands off me you Monster! 

Done for Today guys!

Do now I leave it to your judgements!

Do you think, Nakul is feeling guilty and Bela should give a chance to Nakul?
Should Nakul open up to Bela?
The question is, can he open up to Bela?
Especially when his deep secrets are in the question?

What are your thoughts?

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