25

After glancing at Jimin, who nods and gestures for me to go to the version of myself laying down, I do just that. I lay down next to her, placing my hands on my stomach as we both stare at the ceiling above us.

"You, my spirit," I say, "are exhausted, aren't you? You've been doing your best to hold us together and that took so much out of you, especially because I was only putting more barriers between us."

She sighs, but says nothing.

"You always do your best for me," I continue. "You glue my pieces back together any time they fall apart. You hold onto hope when all I want to do is fall into the void. You're the one who told me to hold my chin up when I would fall to my knees sobbing. I'm sorry to you because I stopped listening to you. I stopped acknowledging how much you were doing for me. You continued to try to hold me together while I was letting myself fall apart, and I can understand how angry you must be. I'm so sorry. The darkness got too loud and I succumbed to it. I'll never forgive myself for falling so far away from you - so far out of your reach - but I can tell you that I'll never hurt you like that again."

She turns to look at me, and I meet her gaze.

"I may be the vessel but you are the center of my being," I whisper. "I have to learn how to love you again. And I will."

She smiles at me, nodding her head as she turns to lay on her side.

This time, I'm the one who goes in for the hug, wrapping my arms around her head and pulling her against my chest.

"We can do this," I whisper as she fades into me. "Together."

I sit up, momentarily feeling my spirit's exhaustion before it too fades and is replaced by a sense of wholeness - of forgiveness.

"You've forgiven yourself," Jimin says, holding out his hand to help me stand. "With forgiveness comes harmony."

"Thank you," I say, letting the tears in my eyes slide down my cheeks. "I didn't realize just how broken I was."

"It's time for you to go," he says, wiping my tears away. "Remember that, in this room, you were reminded not only to be one with yourself, but also to forgive yourself."

I smile and nod as Jimin takes my shoulders, turning me around to face a door that wasn't there before.

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