[9] Pinch


I'm sitting on the grass next to the lake with Lucinda. There's a bench not so far away, but there's nothing quite like having the grass directly beneath you.

This is the third night I've spent haunting Lucinda's dreams. Haunting is such a frightening term to use in this context; but, technically, that's what I'm doing. From her perspective, anyway. In my case, she's kind of haunting my dreams. In the best way possible.

"I'm not going to ask about Bev today, because I know she's not coming," Lucinda says. "She's not in this world anymore."

I lower my gaze, glancing at her teary eyes from the corner of my own. I feel incredibly guilty, because I'm not supposed to let Lucinda remember me. I'm not supposed to allow her to remember this place, or anything else. And she's not supposed to know that she's dreaming—does she know that yet?

"That's why I'm here," I say. "I know I can never replace Beverly, but I want to be a friend to you anyway."

Lucinda smiles through her veil of tears, but it doesn't quite reach her eyes. "I-I sometimes wonder if it's all a dream. I wonder if someday I'll wake up, and Bev will be here, you know? Maybe—"

I bite my lip as she talks on. It's gone on too long enough. She's mentioned the fact that she wonders if it's all a dream. I have to stop her, somehow. So I do the first thing that occurs to me.I throw my arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug beside me. Just like I thought, this silenced her right away.

As we embrace, I think of nothing but the girl between my arms. I never want this moment to end. I wait until I can feel Lucinda's tense muscles relax, and slowly let go of her. She's left staring at the lake before us. Then she turns to me, deeply studying my eyes as though she's looking to find galaxies of meaning behind them. I hope she will.

Lucinda says nothing. The look on her face is one of shock, fear, and something else undistinguishable. I open my mouth to break the silence, to utter a word of apology. "Sorry," I mutter. It's all I can say because I'm not really sorry.

To my surprise, Lucinda smiles. "Why are you apologizing?" She asks.

"I only met you a couple da--just recently," I stutter. It dawns on me that maybe to her, it has felt like more than three times. If that's the case she's incredibly lucky.

She laughs softly, overlooking my suspicious close call. "It's been weeks," she says. Seems that I was right after all. "Besides, I would've pulled away if I didn't like you."

"You like me?" I flinch at the eagerness in my voice. Surely she'll notice.

And yet she doesn't. On the contrary, it's her turn to seem surprised. "You haven't noticed? Why, Omar. I've liked you for weeks. I guess you could call it love at first sight. I was kind of afraid you wouldn't like me back."

I pull her into another tight embrace. So she likes me. A sea of different emotions fills me as I stroke her smooth hair. Everything about this situation is perfect—other than the fact, of course, that it's against the written law of DreamLand.

"Lucinda?" I say. She holds me at arm's length, her head almost level with mine. "I-I don't know if we—"

Before I can finish, I feel a pair of lips on my own, gently kissing them. Too soon, too soon, my brain pleads. But my eyes flutter closed, and we're lost. So much for the laws of DreamLand.

She pulls away first, leaving her hand on my shoulder and her face inches away from my own. Her eyes search mine again, but this time there's a different mood filling them. "Omar...I-I think I'm in love with you."

The words traveled right to my heart, causing it to flutter. Before speaking, I let my eyes dart around the landscape to ensure no one else—Dr. Grantley, specifically—is watching. Then: "I love you too, Lucinda."

I kiss her again, focusing on the texture of her lips. They're warm, yet cold; rough, yet so perfectly smooth. Her lips tell her story—a story of loss, quieted by a glimmer of hope. They tell the story of heartache and love mending it. And I know that the hope and her heart's patchwork is new and fresh. It only just appeared.

"Is this real?" I hear her whisper against my lips. "What if this is all just a dream? Oh, please don't let it be just a dream. Pinch me, Omar. I need to know that it's real."

No. "Of course this is real, my darling. How could this love be so real if it wasn't?"

She brushes the back of her hand against my cheek. "Yes, I know...but pinch me, Omar."

I begin to shake my head, but her eyes are full of hope. This is a dream for her, but it isn't really a dream. She's only in another world, light years away from her own planet and home of misery. What could be the worst thing that could happen if I pinch her, anyway?

So I reach out to the hand stroking my cheek, pulling it down to my lap. I pinch her, just below her elbow.

Then it happens.

Lucinda vanishes, and the room flickers. This time, everything shifts back into the shape of the room much faster than it has the past two times. I guess the technology is becoming accustomed to it now.

But did the pinch cause her to disappear before the appointed time? I cross my fingers as I leave the room and make my way through the endless corridor of the Factory. I guess I'll see what comes of it soon enough.

And what will come of me, if Dr. Grantley discovers what I've been up to.

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