chapter 5

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I wipe my tears as I go up the stairs. He's moved on with a mate and two children and another one on the way while I'm here crying my heart out for him.

Stupid Odetta.

I glance around and I realize that I'm lost. I try to remember what this part of the castle is called or how to get back.

"Good Job Odetta, now you're lost", I murmur to myself and sit on the window still in one of the hallway's wide window.

I struggle not to cry as I bite my lip and swallow the lump in my throat. He made me his last priority and now he has the perfect life. I could have been carrying his child. I could've been the one glowing because of my pregnancy. I could've been the one smiling as people congratulate me. I almost cry out when a someone taps me lightly.

"Fuck." I swear and press my hand to my chest but it's only a little boy.

He looks at me sheepishly and tries to hold back his giggle at my reaction and I smile, "Hi buddy, what are you doing here in this big castle all alone?"

He then pouts, "My daddy is an alpha and he had to go but he left me with a big man and I don't like the big man, he's a meanie."

"What's your daddy's name?"

"I don't know. I call him daddy but people call him alfa Lyrell." He says with a smug air about him. He must be proud of his father.

I realize who his father is. Alpha Casper Lyall. I have never interacted with him but I've seen him in the past. A man with a scary glare, doesn't talk much, tall, big, and only loves his son. His mate died a few years ago.

"Now what's your name? I'm odetta" I say as I stand and pick him up. I balance him on my hip as I start walking to find the west wing.

"I'm Javier but daddy calls me Javi."

He looked nothing like his father if I remember correctly. Maybe he carries his mother's features with his black hair and green eyes.

"How old are you?" I ask to keep the conversation going.

"I turned five. Aren't I big boy?" He says with so much pride and I can't help but giggle.

"Of course you're a big boy. Bigger than all those alpha down there." I reply and he gives me a smug smile.

I see an elderly help, Mrs.Jane, and I scurry over to her "Good evening Jane. We're lost could you direct me to the west wing—" She cuts me off.

"Dear, why aren't you at the party and who's this handsome young man?"

"I just have a slight headache so i retired early and this is alpha Casper's son so if anyone is looking for him, they should be informed that he's with me"

"Yes Miss Odetta. Would you like food sent up?" She questions.

"Are you hungry?" I ask Javier and he nods eagerly.

"Yes please send food for two"

"Okay, the west wing is two stairs up and keep on walking left till you recognize the places with guards and they'll let you pass." She instructs.

"Thank you." I say and start walking towards the staircase.

"Why were you crying?" He asks out of nowhere.

I smile give him a sad smile, "I miss my mate"I simply say.

"Don't worry daddy cries to when he misses mummy." He comforts as he throws his arm around my neck and tucks his head in the crook of my neck.

"It's very painful so just pray that you never loose your mate"

"I'll protect her with my life." He says and I laugh.

"Why didn't your daddy leave you back in your pack?"

"He wanted me to experience being a alfa." He says "when I become alfa I'll be the best in the world."

"My brother should take lessons from you."

"You have a brother?" He says wide eyes like he couldn't believe it.

I giggle, "Yes I do. And two sisters."

"Does it feel good having a brother and sisters?"

"Yes it does and even though we all fight, we love each so much." I tell him.

"Would you give me a sibling?"

He said it with innocence but I interpreted it the other way and almost choke on my saliva.

"You'd have to ask your dad first." I say when when I recover.

"Evening." I greet the guards at the west wing as Javier waves to them.

I enter my room and gently place Javier back down on his feet on the floor before shutting the door behind me.

"Woah I like your room." He gushes and runs to the chair in front of table with my make-up things and a mirror. He struggles to climb the chair and he starts picking up make up brushes.

"This is so cool." He says as he opens my eye-shadow palette. "So many colors." He whispers in awe.

"I've never seen this many womany stuff." He unscrews the cap of my eyeliner and mascera. He sprays my perfume and gives it a sniff. "It smells so womany." He smiles.

I smile and make my way over to him, "Okay enough." I say and pick him up from the chair and then place him in the middle of my bed.

I unlock my phone before putting a game and giving him the phone, "Now be a good boy till I get back." I say but he doesn't hear because he's too engrossed in the game.

I go to the balcony doors and check if it's locked and then I lock my room door. "Javier." I say firmly.

"Hmm." He hums when he drags his attention to me.

"Don't let anyone in and scream if anything happens okay?"

He just nods and goes back to his game. I open my closet and take out sweatpants and a sweat shirt before going to the bathroom.

I don't lock the bathroom door just incase and remove my dress. I remove my bra and throw it in the hamper by the door. I quickly wear my sweatpants and sweat shirt. I turn go to the sink and look at the mirror. I didn't look like shit but I looked like I've been crying. I wash off my makeup and dry my face with a clean hand towel.

When I come out, I sigh in relief because Javier is still where I left him. I put on blue socks and make my way over to my makeup table. I sit on the chair and look in the mirror.

I take out all of the pins in my hair and loosen my hair from its low bun. I run a comb through it and silently thank the moon goddess when it doesn't take so long. I quickly tie my hair in a messy bun.

"I'm hungry." Javier whines and I look at him from the mirror. He struggles to come down from the bed since he's so small and I giggle. He finally makes it down to the floor and runs over to me.

"I'm hungry and bored." He tugs at my hand as he whines. I laugh and stand up before carrying him and placing him on my hip. I put him in between my legs on the couch in front of the t.v. I scroll through the channels and stop on the one that's showing toy story.

"Miss Odetta dinner." Someone says with a knock on the door. We were already half way through the movie and Javier's gaze is locked on the screen.

I stand up, careful not to distract javier and unlock the door before swinging it open. Another maid enters the room with a trolley.

"Thank you I'll take it from here." I say and remove the stainless steel cloche covering two plates.

"Dinner is ready." I say and that grabs Javier's attention.

"Yay." he exclaims as he runs over to me.

"Go to the couch. We'll eat on the couch"

He runs to the couch and waits for me. I take his plate of rice, vegetable sauce and Sirloin steak to him while I place mine on the coffee table.

I go back to the trolley and pour both of us glasses of pineapple juice. I place them both on the coffee table and bring two bottles of water before settling down on the couch.

We begin eating and when we were done, I arrange everything on the trolley before pushing it out and keeping it by the side of my door in the hallway.

"Are you tired?" I ask.

He shakes his head but yawns, "I have to finish watching this movie", he whines.

"It's fifteen minutes past ten which I'm sure is past your bedtime." I tell him and cross my arms.

"No it's not." He argues and yawns again.

"Not to mention that you're yawning like you'll pass out any moment from now." I laugh and I carry him. He rest his head on my shoulder.

"No I'm not." He murmurs.

I lay him down gently on my bed, "go to sleep Javier." I murmur.

"Only if you promise to spend tomorrow with me. It's so boring being all alone."

I nod, "yes I promise now sleep." I urge as I tuck him in.

"Good night ody."

"Good night." I murmur back to a sleeping Javier.

I lock the door before I go to the couch and flip through the channels.

•••

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