𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖊
traitor inside

✦

         HOGWARTS HAD CHANGED since the beginning of the year – even more so since the previous one. Where last year Hogwarts was ruled by Albus Dumbledore and his trusted advisor, Minerva McGonagall, this year it was clear they held no power in the control of the castle. No, that all fell upon Dolores Umbridge, the representative of the Ministry of Magic. Where at the beginning of the year, the only difference with the new professor and the foreboding feeling that something bad was going to happen, everyone now knew the darkness they felt during the welcome back feast.

The safe haven for many – the old castle full of secrets and danger starting up again – was now ran by an evil woman who wore only pink and had this awful, toad-like smile present on her face at all hours of the day. The professor who used bloodquills on her students (I WILL NOT SLANDER forever written on her cousin's skin), torturing them, and marking them so that they will forever remember her, was the dictator of the castle.

This Hogwarts was different. This Hogwarts had the D.A. for the students who needed to learn to fight and protect themselves; to stand up against the great evil outside those four walls of the Room of Requirement. Umbridge, Voldemort, the Death Eaters...

But as the castle had changed, so had Maia Greene. Maia Greene was a Ravenclaw who had a best friend named Emilia Adams. She always had her hair down, except for Potions where she put it in a ponytail, and spent her free hours in the Astronomy tower and never did her homework until the last minute. She enjoyed fashion and having cute, pink nails and never ever thought of herself of having a grain of darkness inside her.

She was harmless; a little girl who barely practiced her spells and the only thing dark inside her was the bitterness that ate at her constantly about her family. But now, she was Amara Carrow; she was Amara Carrow, the future Death Eater, the daughter of a dead mother and Demetri Carrow – known follower of the Dark Lord. She was a girl rotten to the core, no ounce of goodness inside her because it simply couldn't exist.

Funny, how one year can change everything. Because she had changed and she had to adapt to this new world which she would be introduced to the following summer. She's the daughter of two Death Eaters, daughter of a woman who brought her into her home and raised her to be so bright even the sun couldn't compare. She's a witch who never felt like she belonged in her family and now she understands; they weren't her true family, she was meant for the darkness.

All this time she had believed that it had never touched her but in reality, it had coursed through her veins since the day she was born. She just never knew the truth.

But Maia – Amara – wasn't evil. She was still a little girl who was a terrible spellcaster, a teenager of Hogwarts who still procrastinated doing her assignments, and who loved her brother forever. All she wanted to do was protect him and this was the cost. The cost was her life and she would pay it – all for Leo.

Even though she envied her brother in ways and thought of herself as better in others, she loved him. He was her other half, the better part of her she realized now. Where she was born into darkness, he was born into the light. He was the savior and she had to sacrifice herself to let himself become that. She was the price of his safety and she had to pay it for him.

And so she would.

But the mark wasn't there yet, the price hadn't been paid yet, so she was still Maia Greene – she was still a girl pretending that she was good, who wanted to be good. She wanted that light borrowed from the sun, not someone who stole from the night sky.

And apart of that goodness was protection. She needed to know how to protect herself in case anything happened, in case someone wanted to kill her. She would need to fight one day – everyone knew that – but what side she was fighting for was debatable...she knew how she would appear and she knew it would be dangerous for her to turn again; a double betrayer.

There were many students gathered, all with different colors protecting them, the only one not present was the house of green. That was the problem house; that was the evil house. As everyone knew, only evil could be bred from there.

But Maia was not like everyone else. She was Maia Greene, niece to Remelda Black – a Slytherin. She was the niece of Regulus Black – a Slytherin (and who was also believed to be dead for a very long time.) She was the daughter of two Slytherins, one who only knew wickedness but another who wanted the light to touch her but was caged to only see the dark sky.

She knew good could come from anywhere. And on the other side of the coin, evil could begin at any moment from any person, no matter their house. But the others did not think such things. She knew that they believed the darkness could only touch the Slytherins, that light was bred in all their houses and they would never fall. They would never know the darkness and all of the Slytherins had already set their path into the wickedness. There was no saving them.

But with that logic, there was also no saving for. She was on her path to be a Death Eater – their mark the symbol for evil – and maybe there really was no saving her. Maybe she was just destined to fall. A traitor, a betrayer, destined to fall. No savior coming her way.

Harry Potter might be the Boy Who Lived, the Savior of the Wizarding World, but he would not be able to save her. She would just have to fall and that would have to be okay. It wasn't, not yet, because Maia wanted to survive she wanted to thrive, but she would just have to come and accept her fate.

There was no saving her.

She stood in the back with Emilia, who she had begun to smuggle in now that there were so many people Calypso surely couldn't keep track and realize that Emilia hadn't always been there. Neither would anyone else.

They were hidden by the crowd of others but that was alright with her. Harry stood tall at the front, the natural born leader, and Calypso stood beside him. She was smirking and had her hand in a fist, defiance flashing in her eyes. Maia could see it from her and she swallowed. Her cousin was so good, so perfectly pure with a lionheart and here she was; the traitor. The girl with darkness etched inside her bones.

"Alright," Harry started off, catching everyone's attention, "We're going to be starting with the Patronus spell today. I think we're all advanced enough to at least try today, but don't be discouraged if it doesn't come easily."

As he finished, Calypso continued for him, "Think of your happiest memory when you cast the spell. I'm not talking about a funny joke you or someone else made, I'm talking about what fills you with so much joy every time you think about it. That's the memory you need in mind to be able to cast the spell."

Maia sighed. She didn't know what that memory was and didn't know where to start either. Her mind went to when she was young, before Hogwarts, and she was with Leo at their grandpa's place. He was chasing them around the yard and called them both so special and that night they roasted marshmallows making s'mores over a firepit.

It was so easy back then, she noticed that now more than any other time. There was nothing wedged between the two of them, there was nothing pulling them apart. Her hair was lighter from the sun because it had been a particularly bright summer and she was smiling so wide. Maybe this was the memory.

"You ready?" Emilia asked of her and she nodded. "Good, because I think I got mine but I'm not really sure."

"Me too," Maia agreed with her, she loosened herself up before sending a smile to her friend, "Well, there's only way to find out, right?"

"Expecto Patronum," Maia whispered, unsure of herself. She thought of that day, that night, how her grandpa clasped her shoulder and told her that she was so special, doing the same for Leo. The sunshine on her skin, the laughter clawing from her throat, and she wished for it to work.

But nothing happened.

There was no wisp from her wand, no patronus to be seen. Her shoulders sagged; it didn't work. The memory wasn't strong enough, she wasn't happy enough and now she had no idea what else to do.

She looked around at the others and felt her spirits lighten. None of their memories had worked either; she wasn't the only one. "Well, that was a bust," Emilia laughed, "I really should've known that kissing that lifeguard over summer wasn't going to be enough."

"Yeah," Maia laughed with her, though she had to force out the cheer because hers was more meaningful and it should have worked.

Maybe it wasn't the memory...maybe she had to be more forceful. Maybe it just wasn't a spell that could be whispered. So, she tried again:

"Expecto Patronun!"

It was louder this time, more forceful, and yet...nothing happened. Yet again, nothing appeared. So it wasn't the forceful; it was the memory. She hadn't chosen the right one.

Her shoulders sagged and she left out a defeated sigh. Closing her eyes, she tried to think of a different memory. She dug around until she hit something that she never expected; something that made her want to vomit because, for a second, there was pure joy inside her when there should have never been.

Still, she had to try it.

"Expecto Patronun!"

Of course, this time it worked. With the forbidden memory, the spell worked and a wispy Phoenix. She gasped, almost dropping her wand from the shock and the disgust that pooled inside her. Those around her awed – it was a Phoenix, a rare Patronus, and yet it was hers when it shouldn't be.

She doesn't deserve this; the Phoenix had chosen the wrong person.

"Oh my Merlin, you've been hiding a Phoenix?" Emilia laughed, "That's so cool!"

Her friend's gushing only made her feel worse. This shouldn't be hers; hers should be a rat, just like her, not a beautiful and grand bird.

Especially not when the grand memory, the pinnacle of joy, was meeting her father. Demetri Carrow did not deserve the honor of being the memory that would save her from Dementors; he could never even begin to.

This was just a cruel joke on her, her own patronus calling her out on her wickedness that had yet to be revealed. Her joy came from meeting her father; a murderer, the murderer of her own mother. The man who was forcing her to be a Death Eater, as her blood had been before her. That was the memory she had selected, and it shouldn't be that way. This shouldn't be happening to her; she doesn't deserve to call a Phoenix her patronus. She simply wasn't worthy.

This was wrong; it was all wrong. Everything about this memory and this patronus was wrong.

But she didn't have time to dwell on that as Harry yelled out, "GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!"

Maia looked around, confusion brushing her features as people began to panic and run. Before she knew what was happening, Emilia grabbed her hand and yanked her forward so that they were propelled into the fire. "Wait, what's going on?" she called out, hoping that someone heard her over the panic and had an answer.

"Ask questions later, run now," Emilia shot back at her, not even glancing at her as she continued to drag her friend out. So, she did as she was told.

The two ran, hearts beating rapidly in their chests as questions continued to run through their mind but there was no time to dwell on that; all they could do right now was run and hope not to get caught by whatever they were running from.

Eventually, when they were far away from the others and in surrounded by darkness, the two stopped and bent their knees, placing their hands on them as they caught their breaths. "What the fuck happened back there?"

"I don't know," Emilia answered her again, "I don't know."

✦

The times when Leo did stay the whole night, not sneaking out to meet Thea, were the worse.Nights when the Order was visiting and yet he still had to stay for dinner because Nadia refused to let him take his food up to his room was so awkward it made him want to scream and run away. He twirled the spaghetti with his fork, not looking across the table to see Kingsley Shacklebolt or Mad-Eye Moody, the latter of which scared the creeps out of Leo. That glossy eye...

Obviously, they were waiting for him to finish and go upstairs before starting any conversation about the topics they needed to discuss and still, Nadia refused to let him go and save everyone from this awkward time until then. But she was his mother so he couldn't exactly argue with her.

"So," Remelda cleared her throat, attempting a conversation to end the silence, "How's school going, Leo?"

"Good," Leo nodded, "I mean, my science class sucks but that's because the teacher's terrible not because of the material, but art's fun."

"That's good. And your grades?" Nadia asked him.

Leo shrugged, "Think they're alright. Maths is my worst but I don't really understand everything that I'm being taught and the teacher is never there after school for extra help. Thea's really good at maths though so she's been helping me some."

"Maths?" Sirius frowned, looking at him.

"Yep. Numbers and everything – like counting money and everything else," Leo nodded.

Sirius hummed, obviously not understanding but not asking more. None of them really understood what he was talking about, that had always been clear to him since the moment he started middle school and Nadia gave him confused looks whenever he talked about his maths class and everything else. Apparently, Hogwarts didn't think science, math or English were very important, instead educating their students on spellcasting and spellcasting alone.

Leo thought that was a terrible education system, but who was he to say anything? It wasn't like he was a wizard or anything; no, he was just a squib and therefore no one would ever listen to him if he complained about their school systems. But really, for a race that wants to blend in with humanity, they really suck at trying to teach their kids the same things so that they don't look like idiots when asked what 4+4 equals.

"And how's Thea?" Nadia asked him, taking a sip of her water.

"She's good. We're going to the movies this weekend," Leo told her.

"That'll be fun," Nadia commented, a small smile present on her face, "Oh, and your grandpa said you're welcome to stay with him over spring break."

Leo grinned wildly at that. Whereas he used to be able to visit his grandfather as much as he wanted since they lived so close, usually going over on the weekends, now they lived in the heart of London and it wasn't as easy to see him. He missed his grandpa, missed picking flowers with him and having someone to talk about school with who would just understand him.

"Awesome!" Leo exclaimed, causing Nadia to chuckle at him.

"Yes, he's very excited at it as well. Says he missed you," Nadia told him and he just continued to smile.

Mad-Eye then cleared his throat at the smile faded as everyone was reminded that they had business to attend to and Leo just had to leave. Again, he was a squib; he was alone and didn't matter. He looked down at his plate, seeing only a bit of spaghetti left and he stood up. He was about full anyway, so it was fine.

"I think I'm done, I'll be upstairs," Leo announced.

"But you haven't finished dear," Mrs. Weasley stated, looking at the plate that still had food present.

Leo shrugged, "Yeah, but I'm full now."

"Come on, you can finish up the rest of it," Remelda told him, looking at him intensely as she tried to speak silently, telling him that he didn't have to feel forced to leave.

He just managed a weak smile to send to her. "I'm fine, I'll just go to my homework."

There were a few more protests but he just left the dining room and trudged upstairs to his room. He sighed once he shut the door, closing his eyes before going to sit on his bed.

"Those remind me of my own family dinners," the ghost of his mother appeared, floating around the room, "Well, without any joy. My parents had guests over all the time but they never spoke about what they really wanted until I was gone. So rude."

She whispered the last comment, but Leo still heard it and rolled his eyes, lips twitching upwards for only a second. "Yeah, well, they've got bigger business to attend to and I can't be around for it – strictly wizards only."

Nancy hummed. "For me, it was Death Eater business and since I wasn't of age and didn't bare the mark, I couldn't be present in case I went spreading what I heard," she said, "Not that I ever would. I'd be shunned and striped away from my family if I ever did."

"Like Aunt Mel," Leo commented.

"No," Nancy shook her head, "That was different. Remelda chose to broke away; she's the one who paraded her newfound friendships with Gryffindors after the death of her younger brother, Regulus, whereas if I spewed around Death Eater secrets I'd be dead before my time."

"But Regulus is alive," Leo said confusedly, thinking of when, before Christmas break, the ginger cat came home and transformed into Regulus Black; the supposedly dead Black sibling. It was a very confusing time as both Sirius and Nadia thought they were seeing a ghost, Remelda smirked because she already knew (as she always did), and Leo was in the same boat with the Weasleys as he didn't know who the fuck that man was.

"Oh, really? Well, that's a new development," Nadia said, handling the fact that someone she thought was dead resurrected from the grave very well. Not that Regulus had ever actually been dead, though, he had just faked his death when he was younger. "I'm not surprised, really. No one ever truly dies. Voldemort's returned, I'm a ghost, and now Regulus Black is alive...what a shocking twist of events."

"Yeah," Leo agreed, thinking about it. It was true; it seemed that no one in the wizarding world ever seemed to just truly die, they always had to come back in some way or shape. He considered it a good and a bad thing – a very bad thing in some cases.

"Death is boring, anyway, I understand why no one ever really wants to die," Nancy continued, "It's just nothingness. Sometimes you see someone, and then they're gone. I have to say, these are the highlights of my afterlife with you."

Leo placed a hand on his heart, "I'm touched."

Nancy smiled at him fondly, she went over to him and placed her hand on his face – or well, she tried before hers just went through his face. She looked at her form sadly at that. "I regret a lot of things, I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. Like I regret not being there to raise you and sister, I also don't ever regret – not even for a second – dying for you to live. I know the both of you will do wonderful things and it has been worth it."

✦

"Do you even know how Umbridge found out about the D.A.?" Maia asked her friend in a hushed whisper as they walked down a hallway, recalling the last meeting that had been interrupted with a panic.

Emilia leaned in, "Rumor has it that Marietta Edgecombe told Umbridge about it herself, but others say that she was tortured into spilling out the truth. Either way, whatever charm Hermione put on the parchment when we signed at the first meeting tore her up."

"Sucks," Maia frowned, clutching her books tighter at the thought of the parchment somehow finding out about her future and raising hell on her, "Marietta was nice, helped me in Charms my first year."

"Personally, I think she was tortured. I mean, we all know how Umbridge handles detention and if she wants information from you, there's no telling what lines she'll cross to get it," Emilia said, "And now Dumbledore's gone she has complete control. It's gonna be utter hell here now."

"Yeah," Maia nodded in agreement, turning the corner to the corridor where the DADA classroom was located, "I mean, she already sacked Trelawney and now there's no one that will be able to defend the other professors if she decides they need to go. Who knows who she's kicking out next."

Emilia nodded. They got into the classroom and sat down, looking to see that Umbridge wasn't around before she whispered, "Probably McGonagall."

"But she's one of the best professors here," Maia challenged.

"Yeah, but's also the only professor who's really been standing up against Umbridge. Obvious enemy and next target for complete dictatorship," Emilia defended her choice and Maia could only nod at her logic.

"And she'll probably hold onto Snape forever."

Emilia snorted lightly, "Of course she will. Snape does whatever she wants and doesn't ask questions. Merlin, I hate him."

"Same," Maia agreed, "But hey, at least he doesn't completely hate us and fail us for the stupidest reasons like with Gryffindors."

"That house has problems – I can kinda see the hatred he has for them," Emilia said, "But it is unfair that he's so rude to them. Not that they don't deserve it sometimes. That was the thing that bugged me the most about Dumbledore; he always favored Gryffindors more than others. Like so not fair."

Maia nodded, "Always remembered, but not always loved."

"Exactly," Emilia grinned at her and the two giggled, stopping immediately once Umbridge stepped into the classroom. It wasn't like they wanted to be subjected to cruel punishment as she handed out to the students, after all.