Heavily unedited.

Word count: 2879

Diego's POV

*

My foot carried me to and fro, a few steps forward and then a turn, and then a few steps in the other direction. My mind was a jumbled mess as I paced outside the room, my skin crawling agonizingly with each passing second.

It was all my fault.

There was no two ways about it, I deserved to be consumed by this much guilt.

Hailey sat on the chair behind me, her head in her hands while I couldn't even pretend to be calm enough to sit still.

I shouldn't have turned around to leave. But I'd only wanted to give her some space because she felt she didn't want to do 'that' with me, whatever that meant. She'd been in there for a food couple of minutes already and the nurses and doctor had been running tests and whatnot.

I wished they would tell us what was wrong with her already but I knew this things take time.

I shouldn't have come at all. I'd hurt her now. 

Guilt clamped over my shoulders in a vicelike grip once again and I blamed myself for doing this. What could have caused the bleeding? She'd never bled all over the place while on her period before.

The sight of the blood I'd seen on her when we were arguing made me shudder again in dread.

The doctor walked out after what felt like ages but was only about thirty something minutes.

"Doctor. What's wrong with her?" I asked just as Hailey appeared by my side.

"Are you a member of her family?" He asked me.

"Kind of." I nodded.

"Who exactly are you? I'd like to speak to her husband...if she's married."

"Yes. He's her boyfriend while I'm her mom." Hailey quickly told him.

"Okay. Please let's talk in my office." He told me solemnly and I took a huge gulp and followed him, wishing we could appear in his office already instead of walking all the way there.

The silence was agonizing. 

My heart was thumping wildly in my chest with each step we took closer to his office because I knew that was where the truth lay. Hailey was quietly sobbing beside me and this made me frown. She was beginning to scare me.

After getting into his office, I stared at him. "What's wrong doctor?"

"Please have a seat." He told us and Hailey sat. I was too tense to do so.

"I'd like to stand. Just tell me what's wrong with her. Is she okay now? What does she need?" I asked tensely, fearing his response.

"The patient has just suffered a miscarriage. She was a month and three weeks pregnant and suffered from-"

A penetrating silence echoed to a disturbing degree in my head as I stared at him while he just kept rambling out the details.

Hailey's sobs grew louder as she muttered, "I knew it. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. I should've guessed earlier and told her to check. I should've asked her to check. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

I couldn't move.

I felt numb.

All I could see was Adrian's pale as sheet face as she groaned and cried while clutching her stomach, hunching in discomfort.

She had miscarriage...

Miscarriage?

What's miscarriage?

That word meant the death of a baby inside the womb.

A baby.

She was pregnant?

My eyes blurred and I started sniffing as the words finally began to make some sense in my head.

She'd been pregnant.

She'd been carrying our baby. It died.

I didn't know. I had no idea. Apart from Kara's wedding which was just a week ago, I'd been using protection. I was so needy and horny, like a useless dog that I didn't use protection. But he said the baby was seven weeks pregnant. Meaning it happened before we even had our first fight about Cindy. 

When exactly did she get pregnant?

Was it the day we did it in the shower at Stephano's mansion? No. We used protection that day.

Or was it the day we did it in her room while staring at the dressing mirror as I took her from behind? No. We used protection that day too, though I noticed my release had been move powerful and real even though we used a condom.

Had the condom broke?

My shoulders sagged. That would've been it. We had sex a lot and I sometimes got distracted by her beautiful coquettishness that I didn't think with the usual head but with the head below.

All that didn't matter anymore.

I was supposed to be a father but what did I do? I scared her by turning my back on her when she needed me the most. But I hadn't been aware that she needed me when we were arguing. I only wanted to give her space.

What. Have. I. Done?!

My eyes stung as the tears trailed down my cheeks. I sniffed harshly, blinking to clear my vision.

"Can I see her now?" I but out, feeling the heaviness on my chest swell with each passing second.

"She has been diagnosed with emotional instability and she's under quite a bit of mental stress. I would advise you to kindly break the news to her and also, try not to upset her. At all."

"When can we see her?"

"When she's awake. It'll take an hour or two."

"We'll wait." I left Hailey with the doctor to finish the talk with him, feeling too weak to keep hearing all he had to say about Adrian.

Two hours later, Adrian woke up. She'd been cleaned and Hailey was the first to go in. Then she stepped out, wiping her tears.

"Does she know?" I asked, knowing I felt just as broken as I sounded.

"Yes. She figured it out but wanted to confirm from me." Hailey wiped her nose and sighed heavily. "She wants to see you."

I heaved a sigh of relief and quickly opened the door that was keeping her so far away from me. I looked at her weak figure as she faced the other way immediately I stepped in. Walking slowly, I gently picked her hand and pecked the back of it.

"Adrian, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. It was all my fault." I wasn't even making a sound but the tears just kept coming.

"Diego." She called, still facing the other side as she spoke without a hint of emotion in her voice.

"Yes my love?"

"Do something for me." She murmured.

"Anything baby, anything."

"Let's get that break. I need it. Will you give me the break now, Diego?" For the first time, her head slowly turned to face me and I gasped. Her eyes were blank. She wasn't crying or laughing. Just staring. It scared me.

"Please." She added when I kept staring at her and I used a hand to wipe the tears fr my cheek.

I couldn't deny her this. No. It would be cruel of me.

If she wanted to break up, then I would do so even though it would kill me a thousand times over.

"Yes. Let's do that." I sniffed. Then I leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "Do you need anyth-"

"No. Not from you. Please leave, Diego. Don't...don't come back." She said soullessly. I choked on my saliva and cleared my throat aggressively. Leave? How could I leave her in this state when we were still mourning our child?

It wasn't fair. Life wasn't fair. Now, she'd believe more than ever that she truly blackened things.

"But bab-"

"Diego!" She said sharply. "Please leave. Now. Just go. Get out! Please!" She shouted though she didn't cry. She didn't look angry or sad or agitated. She just stared blankly while shouting.

"Okay. I'll leave."

"Good."

Whatever hope I had left was thrown out the window when I saw the viciousness in her eyes as she said the word that broke me.

Nodding blankly, I turned around to leave. Her words stopped my movements though I didn't turn around.

"And not a word to Kara, Diego. I mean it. Goodbye."

I strode out.

Then I approached Hailey who was waiting anxiously and pecked her cheek, making her give me a confused stare. "That was quick. Where are you going? Does she need something? I can get it for-"

"No. She just broke up with me, Hailey. Please take care of her and help me make sure she gets enough rest. She's weak and a little confused, please keep a watch on her so she doesn't do anything stupid. Try not to say anything that could provoke her. Goodbye."

I ignored Hailey's shocked gasp as I turned around and strode down the hallway and out of the hospital. My legs felt heavy but I went through the pain and just kept walking.

*

It's been a few days since I left Adrian at the hospital back in new York, where she was on the bed, looking pale and totally expressionless as she mourned our child in her own way.

Now back in California, I knew it was time I begin my own life fully and grow up to become the man I was expected to be. I owed myself and my lost child the life I would live from now on.

I strode down the hallway and read the room numbers, stopping when I finally got to the room I was visiting.

Opening the door, I strode in and my eyes instantly found him.

He looked...frail.

Old.

His stern expression now mixed with a slight weariness as he caught my figure the moment I stepped into the room. He was watching a news station and he picked the remote to reduce the volume.

"David." He sighed.

The heaviness in my heart slowly dissolved, though not totally. I felt a slight sense of relief. Why? Was it because I was seeing him in this condition? I shook my head. It wasn't because of that.

Maybe because be was alive. Still alive, even with the illness.

I gave him a once over. There were permanent worry lines on his forehead and grey had replaced a good portion of the side hairlines that were once sandy blonde. His thin lips were pressed together in a grim line, his eyes looking haunted.

His hands were thin. No, he was thin. He'd gotten thin. Dad used to be a big man. He was heavily built and had the macho man attitude to match his deep baritone.

My eyes grew warm when I realized I wasn't angry at him and neither did I hate him. But yes, I was disappointed with his actions. I and Kara are the visible evidences of his carnal acts. No woman should ever be taken without her consent.

That shows how manless the individual was.

"How are you?"

"I've seen better days." He stated weakly. Then he looked away. "You came back."

"I didn't run away. I went on a journey."

"And I heard it was successful." He murmured so lowly I almost didn't hear him. "I- I'm sorry."

I stared at him, unspeaking.

He groaned, sounding pained. Then he did what I never knew a man like him could do. He started sobbing. Loudly, in his deep voice.

"Don't cry. Tell me exactly what happened." I told him though my eyes were already getting blurry with tears of my own.

The strongest man I'd ever known was sobbing his heart out right in front of me. Even the strongest of men could sometimes shed a little tear.

"Your mother was sick but wouldn't go for an operation. I knew I had no choice, so I took matters into my own hands and took the irreversible decision. I was callous to have removed her womb, especially without her consent but she had ovarian cancer and wouldn't treat it for some motherly reason I couldn't bring myself to understand. It killed me to do it but, I had no other choice. I couldn't divorce her. I loved her to death. When the pressure came from my parents demanding a child or divorcing my wife so I could be with someone who would give me children, I knew I couldn't let my wife go. Ever. She was my sweetheart. So I raped the beautiful, raven haired maid I met at a party and kept her under watch till she gave birth in Italy. Then I had her brought here and told her I would take the children. My wife told me it was cruel of me and she would leave me if I broke the maid that way so we reached an agreement and she arranged for the driver to elope with the maid and for them to start their own life. I heard she got married to the driver but I told him not to tell her we planned her escape. I know it's cruel. Now when I look back, I shouldn't have done it. But I never meant to hurt your mother or you."

I sighed and took a seat beside him.

"Well you did. I don't know how to get rid of the pain in my heart whenever I think about the fact that my own biological mother was forced that way. More painfully, I'm the product."

"I'm sorry. Your mother is punishing me in her own way. She won't see me, because she knows you've met your true mother. I have ruined everyone's life."

"I'll talk to her. How is the company?"

He sighed heavily. "They're probably thinking of how to take over it by now. I've been sick for a while but I visited regularly. I can't do that anymore and I...don't have any child to take over."

Whatever was left of my heart broke at his words and I nodded, already knowing what needed to be done. Even though I couldn't love Adrian right or have a child with her since our baby already died, I could still do something right. I was a Matthews after all.

I would continue my father's legacy. He acted like a monster but...I now know the reason. Raping my mom wasn't right but he's had his own share of suffering over the past two decades.

"I'll oversee things until you get better. I'll contact George and have him call up the lawyer. We can't delay any longer.

"My will has already been written and you're the heir-"

"I know. We'll need George for the drafting of the instant transfer of shares. And he'll announce a board meeting which will take place next week Monday."

Another heavy sigh escaped his lips. "I don't think Selena would want my money after what I did-"

"They're doing well on their own. I'll take care of them."

"Thank you, my son."

I didn't say anything and just called George, my dad's secretary who instantly got to work.

An hour later, everything had been set up perfectly.

"How is Adrian?" He asked me.

My heart flipped. "She's doing okay."

"Cindy reported you to me."

"In this condition?" I scrunched up my nose. Was she stupid?

"Hear me out. She's with Mark. Your Mark. She said you had a fight with her over your girlfriend and said some hurtful things to her in front of your colleagues so she had to leave Italy. She said she wasn't trying to seduce you and only wanted to reminisce and hangout as friends. She admits to being out of line. I might've told her your little girlfriend would destroy you by making you act more recklessly and never return home."

"Well, I have nothing to say to Cindy. She called Adrian a bitch, which is unacceptable. Also, nothing gives you the right to make your opinions on my girlfriend. If it means anything to you, I'd like you to know that she was the one who begged me to come here. She'd been doing that for months even though I told her how callous you are."

"Talk to Cindy. She's pregnant." He smiled fondly while ignoring whatever I said about Adrian. He always wanted me to date Cindy. "She's hurt by your words. I don't want all of you hurting anymore. Please, it won't be worth it in years so find a way to forgive her and you'll feel your heart grow lighter.

"I'll visit some other time." I got up with irritation and dashed for the door.

"Diego?" I turned around and saw the regret in his eyes. "I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for yours and Adrian's child loss. I know your pain."

My eyes clouded with hot tears but I turned around and swiftly dashed out of there, rubbing my eyes with the back of my hand.

I already lost my girlfriend and unborn baby.

I would focus on work from now on and never think of anything else because the pain was just too much to bear.

The moment I got back into my car, I called Stephano and scheduled a time when we could talk properly about business because his guidance would go a long way right now.

I drove out of the park, feeling empty and tired.