Your POV:
"There is no way you are more of a pervert then me." I say crossing my arms.
"Oh yeah? Prove it!" Kenny yells at me through his parka.
"Fine! How about a pervy pick up line competition!" I challenge.
"Sounds good to me." He says pulling his hood down. "Guys come over here! We need some judges!" Kyle, Stan, and Cartman walk over.
"The fuck you guys talking about?" Cartman asks.
"Kenny says he's more of a perv than I am." I explain. "I tell him he's crazy!"
"And I'm telling her that I've been a perv since before she could talk." Kenny counters.
"Okay then? Let's do this." Stan accepts.
"Okay! I'll go first. Whoever blushes first loses." I say laying out the terms. "Touching is allowed. Groping, not so much." Kenny nods agreeing with me.
"Deal. You go first." I nod at him thinking of a few pick up lines I have used before.
"Do you work at UPS? Because you were totally checking out my package." I say smacking my butt. Causing Kenny to accidentally let out a snicker of laughter.
"Good one. My turn. Love is a sensation. Caused by a temptation, to feel penetration. A guy sticks his location in a girl's destination to increase population for the next generation. Did you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?" He finishes in a sultry deep voice. I look at him straight faced willing myself not to blush.
"Okay, that was good. But how about this one? I'm buying a new bed from Ikea." I start smirking.
"Why?" Kenny asks.
"So I can teach you some new things to use." I flirt wiggling my eyebrows.
Kenny rolls his eyes. "That was dumb. How about this. I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mom and dad. Pucker up and kiss my ass because I'm bloody fucking mad." Kenny says.
"You thought mine was dumb? That didn't even rhyme." I scoff. "Okay, time to bring out the big guns. The word of the day is 'legs' get ready because I'm going to spread the word." I say not being done. "If your right leg is Christmas and your leg leg is New Years, could I come visit between the holidays? Wanna do math? Because we can add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs and multiply. Were you born in a dog and cat groomer? Because you sure know how to Soak a pussy." I get really close to his ear and whisper for a final blow. "Come here and I'll show you what a fox really says." And I lick the shell of his ear. I pull back to see his face is bright red. A red that would put Spain's tomatoes to shame.
"YES I WIN!!!!" I say doing a sexy, flaunty dance.
"Dude I can't believe it! She beat Kenny! I have never seen him blush!!" Kyle said in awe.
"Welp! We know who the bigger pervert is. Winner, (Y/N)!!!" Stan said holding my hand high. I stick my tongue out at Kenny whom is still stunned. He snaps out of it and grabs my hand pulling me close and whispering in my ear.
"Better watch out (Y/N) because when I'm done with you tonight, you won't be able to walk right tomorrow." He said seductively, his voice full of lust. I shutter involuntarily at his tone kind of excited. I couldn't wait...

A/N: so guys! First story for this one shot book. Story was requested by @kawaiigrirl
If it is wanted, I will do a part two but only if is it requested. Please vote and share this with your friends. It will help me get more chapters/oneshots out. P.S. sorry the cover photo is horrible. I did that with my finger on my phone. Anyway, enjoy~~~~
~Hasta la pasta