The hot showers run in the locker room. Guys get fully naked without batting an eye. Poor 10th grade Jonathan waits his turn for the showers. He waits for them to be empty.

Finally right before the end of the period all the guys are out dicking around near the lockers. Jonathan turns on the shower and washes the sweat off of himself. Today in gym they played volleyball, which he was surprisingly half decent at. As Jonathan continues showering and replaying the awesome serves he had, a sudden whistling echoes throughout the showers. The blue eyes go wide on the chubby face of the teenager. Maybe one of the boys at the lockers was a really loud whistler; Jonathan only hoped. With a sudden urge, the young clown scopes out the showers, spotting another boy on the other side of the showers. The blue eyes watch the soapy water run down from his curly hair, down his dark back and down his- “OH MY GOD! JONATHAN DENNIS HAS A BONER!” A kid shouts and the kid showering looks at the plum teenager. Jonathan instantly covers himself. Another kid laughs, “YOU CAN BARELY SEE IT UNDER THAT GUT OF HIS!”

Jonathan grabs his towel and pushes through the dickbags of kids. He quickly gets dressed in the bathroom stall. He washes off his face and stares at himself in the mirror, “Why am I so ugly and… fat?”

“You’re not,” a soft voice says. Jonathan’s heart beats in his pierced ears, it’s the boy from the showers. His bright smile makes his green eyes look like emeralds.

That look, that boy, made Jonathan feel something he’s never felt before; a deep feeling of want, nervousness, and love.

At nearly midnight Jonathan’s eyes flutter open. His pallid hand moves to wake up his sleeping friend.

“Luke,” the clown weakly tries to get his friend’s attention. The bearded man finally gets the hint and wakes his ass up. He smiles at his friend and hugs him, “Fuck! I knew I’d see those silly blue eyes again!” Delirious weakly laughs and then frowns at CaRtOoNz’s “I’mma fucking rant” stance.

“What?” Delirious tries to sound innocent, but he damn well knew why his friend is mad.

“Don’t “what” me. What the fuck were you doing Delirious? You nearly got yourself killed.”

“I know, but-”

“But what man?! I was so fucking worried when I got the call from the hospital! Then they told me you had a concussion, and some cuts from the glass,” Luke throws his arms in the air as he rants. Delirious sighs at his friend, “I’m sorry that I worried you CaRtOoNz. I… my…” Delirious has trouble speaking, this is a side effect of a concussion, but really he didn’t want to tell CaRtOoNz the multiple reasons he crashed.

“Delirious? Are you okay?” The bearded man comes into full vision in front of the clown. He slowly shakes his head and then stays quiet, so Luke changes the subject, “Evan called.” Delirious bites his lips and the inside of his cheek; this is a sign that Delirious is about to cry. Before Luke can say or do anything, Jonathan breaks into tears. His face turning red as he sobs, he brings his scarred hands to his face. “Johnny? Jonathan? Are you alright?” Luke sits on the bed beside him and tries comforting him. The bearded tickles Jonathan’s shoulder as his friend leans his head on it.

After a little bit, Jonathan finally settles his crying. He turns to Luke and rubs his eyes, “You know I hate how much I weigh CaRtOoNz. You know that’s my biggest insecurity.”

“Yes, I know.”

“I… I was late for work, because I was playing a little longer with Vanoss and a few of the other boys. So I rushed and didn’t drive very safely, and at that stop light Luke…” Jonathan sobs and gives a guilty look at his friend, “I kept thinking about my weight and how I’d never find someone to love me, because of it. I thought about getting fired from work, losing everything. I thought-”

“You need to stop thinking,” Luke stops Delirious mid-explanation. Delirious slowly nods and starts to laugh, “You’re right, but I can’t when all my friends are fit as a fiddle.”

“Who cares? And actually not all of them are,” Luke argues, “but if your weight mattered so much to them, why would they be your friends?”

Delirious shrugs at his friend, his eyes still glistening with tears. He merely shakes his head and then waits for a doctor or a nurse to come in. To let him go.

A few moments later, Jonathan sighs, “So what’d Evan call about?”

Luke clears his throat, “He was super worried about you.”

Jonathan’s heart skips a beat; why? Evan was a friend, he deserves to be worried.

“Did anyone else call?” Jonathan questions and Luke shakes his head, “No, nobody except Evan.”

Another skip.

“Alrighty, what’d he want?”

Luke gives his friend a faint smile, afraid of the raccoon’s reaction.

“Oh god…” Delirious is suddenly peeved at his friend.

“He wants to visit you-” Delirious tries to interrupt CaRtOoNz, but Luke holds his hands up to stop Delirious from speaking. “Before you say anything… Evan’s very worried about you Delirious. Mentally and physically.”

“Physically?” The clown snaps; glowering.

“No! Stop that! Stop being so angry!” Luke snaps at his friend, “These people fucking care about you. I told Evan about your accident and he got super worried. He wants to come and see you, but you’re too worried about you goddamn appearance when you’re a steaming hot man! You can’t see that, but everyone else can!”

“Everyone else calls me fat! I get rude comments all the time Luke! At work! In the fucking store! Everywhere!”

“Everywhere except at home, and on the internet,” Luke states, a pleading smile on his face, “Please, give Vanoss a chance. This will be a big step for you Jon. Maybe Evan will be the one to show you that nobody cares about your weight or how you look.” Jonathan’s heart skips another beat at the thought of Vanoss being the one to change his world. He gives a petulant sigh, “I… I guess he can come.” CaRtOoNz jumps up from the bed and cheers, “Evan will be so happy to hear this! I can see you trying to hide that damn smile you clown! You’re a lil excited too!” Jonathan finally laughs with his friend thinking; maybe this won’t be too bad, Evan is a close friend of his.

“Mr. Dennis?” A tall doctor marches into the room with a clipboard. Jonathan nods at the doctor. Luke notices his friend go tense. The doctor walks toward him with a stolid look on his face. He didn’t seem worried, or happy for Jonathan’s situation. “Is everything okay, Doc?” CaRtOoNz wonders. The doctor sighs once again, “Well, due to Jonathan’s concussion we’ll have to run some tests on him. Has he been talking to you okay?”

“Yeah, just a few stuttering words.”

“Yeah, but that’s a usual thing,” Delirious adds on. The doctor nods, “Well then that’s good, but there’s a slight chance Jonathan that you won’t be able to look at a screen for the next week or so.”

“That’s okay,” Jonathan agrees and then gets up off the bed to start the tests with the doctor, but as soon as he gets up his head starts to spin and a pounding pain rumbles through his skull.

“Ouch! Ouch!” He yells as the doctor and Luke grab him by the arms. He plops onto the bed and holds his head.

“Maybe more than a week or so,” the doctor says with a hint of sorrow in his voice. “I guess we’ll need a wheelchair to get you to the testing rooms, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Delirious mumbles as the doctor walks out into the hallway and yells for a nurse. He turns to Luke and frowns, the pain gradually getting worse. Tears threaten the eyes of the 31 year old man. He shakedly sighs and leans his head onto Luke’s shoulder. The bearded man wraps his arm around his bud and squeezes him close, “It’ll be alright.” As he comforts Jonathan he pulls out his phone and texts Vanoss;

“He needs you.”

“Is he okay with me coming?”

“He’s more than okay, but right now he’s not okay without you.”

“What? What happened?”

“He can’t walk straight and his head is killing him. I think his concussion is worse than we thought.”

“Oh god, I’ll book a ticket right now then. I’ll see you guys soon.”

“Okay.”

The texting ends as the doctor walks in with a nurse following behind him with a wheelchair. Jonathan slips into it and the nurse pushes him out of the room. The doctor solemnly smiles at Luke and shuts the door as they make their way to the concussion tests.

***