TW: University!AU, Trans Character, Autistic Character, Drunk Sex, Alcohol

handy dandy pronoun guide
Smiff: they/them/their/themself
Ross: he/him/his/himself
Trott: ve/vir/virs/virself

"Hey, yo."

Smiff glanced up from the tiny dragons they were doodling and managed to look in every direction except the guy who had been trying to get their attention.

"Hey, you were in last week, right?" Fuck, it was the cute guy who they had definitely not gravitated towards on the first day when they were picking their seat. Smiff nodded, smiling again.

"You weren't, though, right?"

"Yeah, mate, and I'm totally bloody lost. I was all 'It'll be right, just social policy shite' and now." Smiff snickered, sparing a glance away at their professor. Totally absorbed in writing on the board. Sweet.

"If you found social policy easy, this should be a doddle." Smiff's mind flashed back to the little dragon teeth devouring their notes, decidedly not helping them learn this crap.

"You're kidding, right? I'm Ross by the way." Ross nodded, grinning and drumming on the desk for a moment before glaring at their fingers and silencing them.

"Smiff. With two fs. And they pronouns." Smiff nodded, too tired to be uncertain. It was a morning class, plus he was pretty sure Ross genuinely needed them to explain the shit they'd covered.

"Cool. He/him for me." He nodded again, and Smiff nodded back. So that was awesome.

They both actually turned to listen to what was going on up at the front for a few minutes, but when they were all getting up to leave, clutching battered coffee cups and thick scarves, Ross nudged at their shoulder.

"So, will you show me the shit I missed? I'll explain anything you don't get about social policy too." Ross paused for barely a moment, Smiff only just able to get their mouth open to reply before he laughed and added, "Hell, come on Friday night and I'll even give you free beer."

"Now that is an offer I can't say no to. Like, seriously, you could tell me you'd finish the night by murdering me in a backalley and I'd probably still come." Smiff grinned, chugging the dregs of their coffee and making a face.

"Your face looked like someone shat in your coffee and then died in it. Attractive." Ross added conversationally. Smiff choked on their laughter and Ross patted their shoulder, grinning. "Nah, me and Trott have been trying to convince ourselves that it doesn't count as a waste of time if we also study, and you'd just be facilitating us. Wouldn't even need to drink, if you don't want to."

"I am so in, give me your number?" When Ross looked down to fumble his phone out, Smiff totally took the opportunity to check him out, and not entirely subtly. He had a really nice coat. And fucking- mindblowing eyes- or some shit.

If Smiff had thought Ross was hot before, that was nothing compared to how they felt when he was waving a bottle around and lecturing them on how to properly make jokes out of people's names.

"It's just gotta be memorable, mate, that's all I'm saying." Ross shrugged, turning the page when Trott snickered from the corner. (Trott was also pretty cool. Just, not in the fucking-over-a-desk-in-the-middle-of-a-classroom kind of way.)

"Yeah, it totally is- we'll remember the shit name and the even shitter argument, it's all part of my-" Smiff paused for dramatic effect, "-evil master plan."

They all took a moment to look at each other, before bursting into laughter, Smiff's sides aching already, and they only stopped when their phone went off to tell them they'd 'worked' for long enough to earn a break.

Smiff quickly silenced it, not sure when Ross had changed the alarm to some god awful wailing noise, and raised his glass to the others. "Cheers, folks."

The call was echoed by the other two, and Smiff sat back against their worn sofa, tucking their feet under themself.

"So, regretting agreeing to help me out yet?" Ross nudged their knee, his smile soft and understated, like Smiff's favourite wooly jumper.

"Nah, not yet. You gave me free alcohol and explained the social policy stuff, you basically own my soul for life,"

"Oooh, that's not the only thing he wants" Trott grinned, vir voice low and gritty, kicking at Ross's shoulder.

"Fuck off, mate," Ross grinned, shaking his head.

"What'cha gonna do Ross, huh?" Smiff joined in with the heckling, laughing when Ross turned to glare and laugh at them before flicking back to Trott when ve continued.

"He's gonna go do some jenkum, aren't you mate? Yeah, I knew it. Fuckin jenk."

Smiff wheezed out a laugh, covering their mouth and staring at Trott, putting their hand up for a high five. "Trans twosome, wrecking shop already, fuck yes."

Ross snorted, and Trott looked at him after ve'd high-fived Smiff. "I give it a D. Needs some improvement- trans trio is clearly the best option."

"Aw, that's just harsh marking. What's it- £15 for a re-mark?" Smiff shook their head, nudging their folder away with their foot. "Besides, you'd have to find a third for that."

Ross raised his hand, cracking his neck and switching from fidgeting with his jeans to drumming on them, but still smiled wide. It took Smiff a long moment, and then they broke out into a grin, throwing their hands in the air. "Shit, mate, awesome! Trans trio is go! Sweet."

"Thank you, thank you," Ross bowed exaggeratedly, his hand doing little swirly things the whole time.

"Oh, you better be careful now Ross, they like you even more now than they did before," Trott's smile turned shit-eating, and ve grinned, picking their stack of notes back up. "Probably should get back to work though- Smiff, alarm?"

"On it." Smiff pushed themselves away from the sofa and balanced their folder back on their lap, fumbling their phone but finally getting it to do what they wanted.

Ross snickered while he watched them, and then glanced back up at Trott. "What you working on at the minute, anyways? You don't take this class."

"Film coursework, you tosser. You should be doing it too, you know." Trott tilted the papers at Ross, and Smiff got a glimpse of vir cramped handwriting all over what was probably a script or something.

"Nah, that's tomorrow's job" Ross leaned over anyway, letting his fingers trail across the edge of Trott's notebook and bouncing in a very obviously happy way at the sound it made.

"Okay, so what was all that about-" Smiff dove back into prodding Ross for answers, because as much as they liked him, they could really use the help. It was a nice rhythm that they all settled into, Trott throwing out obscure questions that had Smiff wondering what exactly vir coursework even was, Ross spinning his pen and tapping constantly as he traded questions with Smiff, the two of them steadily plowing through several pages of notes.

Smiff felt all fuzzy around the edges and couldn't help giggling as they leaned their head on Ross' shoulder. Trott had staggered off to vir room over an hour ago, leaving Ross and Smiff to get progressively drunker. And they had done incredibly well at that.

Also, they'd kissed him a few times. More than a few. And Ross was grabbing at their jaw and dragging them in for another one, and wow, that sure was nice. Ross was nice. His mouth was nice. Nice.

"We're drunk," Smiff laughed, their legs sprawled out on the floor, only staying up thanks to the grip they'd gotten on Ross' shoulders. Which were also nice.

"Yep," Ross tapped on Smiff's cheek, smiling, his gaze hovering on each of Smiff's freckles.At least, that's what it looked like he was doing, but it was kinda hard to tell, what with most of their freckles being like, on their face. Where their eyes were. So they couldn't see.

Smiff kissed him again. "Also, I kinda want to suck you off. Hi."

Ross spluttered and laughed, and Smiff could hear him moving but didn't look away from his face.

"Yeah, we can do that," Ross bounced to his feet, unbalancing Smiffy in the process. Smiff laughed into the carpet, and then wobbled upwards, kissing Ross again when they got the chance, deeper and longer than before.

"Awesome," Smiff grinned against Ross' mouth, pushing him on when he hummed in agreement.

They shuffled towards Ross' room together, Smiff somehow managing to keep them both mostly upright, with a bit of effort. Quite a bit of effort.

Smiff went to crawl onto his bed as soon as they got into his room, but Ross held his hand up. "Hang on, this blanket was expensive," He gathered it all up, handing it to Smiff and laughing when they staggered backwards under the weight of it.

"Is it meant to be that heavy?" Smiff chuckled as they tucked it on the chair in the corner, knocking over a stack of paper as they did. They almost apologised, but Ross was right there and licking into their mouth, so they figured it didn't matter.

"Yeah, that's why it's expensive," Ross replied late enough that it took Smiff a moment to understand, but they smiled and nodded, pushing his shoulders until they both collapsed on the bed, tangled and awkward and giggly.

Ross managed to pull his shirt over his head without dislodging Smiff too much, and they hummed happily, mouthing at his throat and letting their hips rock against his. This was like, nice. Ross was a cool guy. Smiff couldn't wait to get him naked properly.

And then like, he was. Smiff was too tipsy to bother working out how he'd done it, but their chin still throbbed a little from where they'd gotten hit in the face with a stray elbow. But like, Ross was naked and underneath them. Naked.

Smiff needed to talk to people in their classes more often, jesusfuck.

They shifted to kneel between Ross' legs, throwing their shirt across the room at the same time. They waited while Ross looked them up and down before grinning and sliding their hands up his ribs, stopping just before his chest and raising an eyebrow. "Do you want me to...?"

"Nah. You said something about blowing me, though?" Ross' fingers skimmed over his own skin as if he was smoothing out a blanket, staying just below Smiff's hands. He made a soft noise and nodded when Smiff shuffled down the bed, and Smiff quickly reached down to loosen their jeans, because man. Man. Ross looked fucking great.

So like, Smiff just spread his legs apart and let out a heavy breath, leaning in to nip gently at the inside of one of Ross' thighs. He was covered in soft, dark hair, here, and Smiff ran their hands up his legs in appreciation.

"You're hot," Smiff mumbled, burying their face in Ross' skin and laughing when Ross made a choked noise.

They ducked their head, glancing up at Ross one last time before licking across him, firm and steady. He groaned, one of his hands instantly flying down to grab at Smiff's hair, so they kept going, warming him up with broad strokes with their tongue, and shit, he made some really amazing sounds. Like, fuck.

Smiff really wanted him to sound like that more. So they did it again, the tips of their fingers teasing at where he was all soft and wet, a little clumsily but apparently good enough to earn them a louder moan, one of Ross' legs coming up to drag them closer, his heel digging into their back.

"More?" Smiff smirked, their lips brushing against his skin as they spoke, and Ross tugged at their hair and whined, high pitched and frantic. "Yeah, okay,"

Smiff fucking loved being an asshole. Still, they loved having their mouth on him more, so they gripped his thighs tightly and encouraged him to hook his other leg over their shoulder and man, with that angle, Smiff could do this for years, if Ross let him.

But oh god, Ross was pulling them closer and moaning and shit, he was totally going to come, Smiff just had to-

Fuck.

Fuck, the way he fucking sounded and felt and just- was. Ross was amazing, and Smiff crawled up his body, wiping their face on a shirt before nuzzling into his neck, hand on their cock the whole time.

"Shit, Ross," Smiff gasped, laughing weakly when Ross nodded, collapsing on top of him as they started to grind into their hand.

"Amazing-" Ross mumbled, his hand clutching at Smiff's shoulder and sliding down to the dip in their back, humming softly and shifting up, closer to them.

Smiff let out a choked noise, their face crashing into the crook of his neck as their arm sped up impossibly on their cock, and fuck, it was so good, Ross was so good, everything was really fucking good.

Smiff cursed as they came, crumpling on top of Ross as soon as they'd quickly wiped up the mess. Ross wrapped his other arm around them, and Smiff's stomach made a weird noise. Laughing with him felt just as good, apparently. It was nice.

"You're nice." They were trying to get into the habit of complimenting people out loud rather than just in their head, so.

"You too."

"When I'm not being an ass,"

"Still cool with you then. You make Trott say weird shit, I'm down with that."

Smiff snorted at that, rolling onto their side so they could look at Ross properly, even though it was dark and they could barely see. It was the principle of the thing. Besides, they should always at least try to look at pretty people.

"Want me to grab that blanket for you?" Smiff heaved themselves up, pressing their lips against Ross' in passing.

"And some clean shorts, too?"

"Got it,"

Credit to quakcingfish on Ao3