"She's beautiful.", says a smiling nurse. I can't help but agree as I look at my newborn sister. From her tiny little hands to her rosy, light brown cheeks, she is adorable. She also looks a lot like me. We have the same light brown bi-racial skin tone and the same green eyes and the same button nose. She isn't crying. At first that worried the doctors. They took Ria away to do a bunch of tests and an hour later they confirmed that nothing was wrong with her, she's just not a crier.
          "Do you want to hold her?", my mom asks me.
         "Um, yeah. Sure.", I reply. I wash my hands and take the baby into my arms. She smiles and gurgles at me.
         "She likes you.", my mother says.
         "Are you ready to sign the papers, Ms. Thomas?", asks a nurse. My mother doesn't answer her. I look up at the nurse and realize that when she says Ms. Thomas, she's talking to me,
          "Pardon me?", I ask confused.
          "Can you give me a sec with the Serena?", my mother asks the nurse and Savannah. The nurse nods and leaves. Savannah begins to wheel away when I stop her.
          "No. Savvy can stay.", I say with the stubbornness of a toddler.
          "Okay, I guess.", my mother replies, "Where is your father?"
          "Probably somewhere writing me out of his will.", I say bitterly. Seeing my mother's confused look, Savvy explains everything that happened. My mom's face goes pale.
           "Please don't say you're a homophobe too, mom.", I say.
          "No. That's not it. I actually knew you were gay a while ago.", her face is still pale, but she is smiling now.
         "WHAT?!", I respond. Savannah is snickering.
          "You're my daughter, Serena. Of course I knew, but your father is going to kill you. Not figuratively speaking." Now it's Savannah's turn to go pale.
"Wha- wha- what?", she stammers.
"Okay now it's even more important that you sign those papers. Today.", mom says. Her face is still pale. I mean, my mom is naturally pale, but this is like......even paler than usual.
"For God sakes, WHAT FUCKING PAPERS?!", I exclaim.
"Watch your mouth.", my mother replies in a mom voice, "The papers that make you, and Savannah if you so choose, Ria's legal parents."
Um, what?
"Mom, why?"
She starts to cry.
"Because, Serena, you need to get away from your father. And Ria does too. You need to get the hell out of this town." It suddenly becomes clear what my mother is saying. She was proposing the very thing that Savannah and I have dreamed about doing since forever. Running away. And she wanted me to take little Ria, which makes sense, but I there's just one thing......
"So why do we need to take legal parenthood of Ria if you're coming too?", I ask. A single tear rolls down her cheek.
"No.", now I start to cry, "Mom. Listen to me.", I hand Ria to Savvy and place a hand on my mother's face, " I am not leaving you with that.........that douche bag husband of yours."
"Serena, I have to stay.", she replied calmly.
"No! You don't. You can divorce dad and get a restraining order on him or something and come with us!"
"I can't sweetie.", she says, not meeting my eyes. She pulls something from underneath the hospital bed sheets. It's a large roll of hundred dollar bills she extends it toward me, "Take this, take Ria, and leave."
"Mom.", I say, looking the money she is holding, "Where did you get that?"
"I found it in your father's sock drawer. Take it and use it wisely until you find work."
"Mom, he's going to kill you if he finds out you took that."
"No he won't.", she replied with absolute certainty, "He loves me."
Oh God.
"Do you really still believe that, mom?", I ask her. How can she believe that?
"Listen to me,'Rena. You're father is a very dark and cold man, but somewhere in his icy, black heart, he loves me."
"BUT MOM,", I whine, "Savannah and I don't know how to take care of baby!" Savvy nods in agreement.
"I didn't know how to take care of a baby when I had you, and you turned out alright." That shut me up. The nurse came back in with the papers and Savannah and I signed them. I took the money from my mother. I gave her Ria so that she could say goodbye. She looks down at the baby who smiles up at her. Waving her little arms around in the air. Grabbing for things that we older people can't see. Little magical things that only exisist in a baby's word.
"My baby girl.", she says to Ria. "I just want you to know that I love you and that I wanted you." She kisses Ria on the head as little Ria basks in her mother's love. After seeing that it made me feel like a jerk for taking her.
          My mom looks up at me.
          "Whatever you do, don't tell her about me or your father."
          "What? But mom don't you want her to at least know ABOUT you?", I ask. Sooner or later Ria's gonna be old enough to be confused as to how two women made her. And then there will be questions.
          "I don't want there to be anyway for your father to reach her. That's why this is a closed adoption."
          "What's that?", I ask. Savannah chimes in,
          "It means the biological parents can have no contact with the child until they are at least eighteen."
         "You don't have to do that, mom!", I say, my voice trembling. How can she stand to be cut off from Ria like that?
         "Yes I do, I-", she begins until another nurse comes in and cuts her off.
          "Your husband is in the waiting room requesting access. Does he know about the adoption m'am?" My mother goes pale again.
          "You have to get out of here.", she says. I start to cry again.
          "Mom"
           "NOW!", she shouts with tears in her eyes, "I love you, Serena. Don't you ever forget that."
          "I love you too, mom. I will come back for you. I swear.", Savannah wheels over to the hospital bed to take Ria.
          "You be good to her, Savannah. And thank you for being a light in her life.", mom says to Savannah. Savvy nods back, knowing that no words needed to be said. I walked over to my mom and kissed her on the head.
          "Goodbye, mama.", I say to her. I am suddenly a kindergartner on the first day of school. Saying goodbye to my mama. 
          "Goodbye my sweet 'Rena."
Then we leave. We don't go through the waiting room so my father doesn't see us. We start to get in the Prius when I see a form running toward us in my peripheral vision. I freeze with fear for a quick second. All that is going through my head is "Oh God it's my father". But no. It isn't.  It's the nurse that gave me the papers that made Ria mine.
          "WAIT!", she calls out to us, "Your mom wanted to me to tell you that there is a car seat for Ria in her car. And......good luck."
         "Thank you.", I say to her. She winks and heads back to the building. I put the baby seat in the backseat and strap Ria in. I put on my seatbelt and start to drive.
          "Where to?", I ask Savannah.
          "How do you feel about New York City?", she replies with a smile.