I woke up to the smell of bacon. I was still tired, but of course the heavenly scent roused me.
          I got out of bed and walked into the kitchen. Savannah and Julia were making breakfast while little Ria watched from her playpen. The two women were chatting and laughing. I walked into the kitchen and kissed Savannah on the head. I looked up at Julia.
          "Well, what is going on in here?", I asked, "Whatever it is, don't stop, I'm hungry."
Julia laughed and Savannah replied,
"Sure, make the ladies in the house do all the work." I gave her a look and she laughed.
"Whatever, Savannah," I said jokingly, "I'm gonna go shower."
          I walked down the hall to the bathroom which was completely stark white. The walls, the shower curtain, the rugs, the tile.
          When I turned the water on, I found myself grateful for the amazing water pressure. Most people hate water that has so much pressure it hurts, but am not most people. I would take a shower with a fire truck hose if I could.
          I turn the water all the way to the hottest it can go, as usual. I stood there thinking for a while. I thought about Julia first. How it must feel to lose someone that you'd known literally since birth and maybe even before. I thought about her blue hair and her slim figure. Her red lipstick and winged eyeliner. My mother rarely wore makeup.
          I thought about my mother next. What it must be like to leave your home. To run away to a foreign place where people had strange accents and weird beliefs. To do all of that for a guy. A guy who would, in the end, break her heart. More than once.
          Then my thoughts shifted to my father. He was so loving. Such a gentlemen, but he is no longer that man. Last night my mother explained to me what happened.
          Jack and Diane were happy. They had a house of their own and a beautiful baby girl. They had each other. At first, Diane was a little annoyed at having to fake her holiness, but after a while it just grew to be a routine. Just a show that played every Sunday, staring her.
           One day Jack came home angry. He threw down his work bag, slammed the front door behind him, stormed off into their room and slammed that door as well. Diane was already in their room sitting up on the bed. She was terrified because Jack was usually so calm and level. She got out of bed and stood on the opposite side of the room.
          "Jack? What's wrong?", she asked him. He glared at her. She willed herself not to cry under the pressure of his burning stare.
          "Those bastards laid me off, that's what's wrong!", he replied in a raised tone. Laid him off?, Diane thought, What does that mean?
           "I'm not sure I understand, honey.", she said to him in a calm tone, hoping to cool him off.
          "Of course you don't! It means I lost my job, Diane!", he said angrily. Diane was frightened. There were times when Jack had gotten angry, but it was never directed at her. She tried to settle herself by telling herself that his anger was not for her. It was for the people who fired him.
          "That's awful, but it's going to be okay.", she tried to tell him. He glared at her. Diane shivered from the chill of the ice in his eyes.
           "That's easy for you to say. You don't pay the bills, you don't buy the food to put on the table, you don't buy things to care for Rena, I do! All you do is play with the dirt in that pitiful pile of soil you call a garden, burn dinner, and give a nipple to Serena. You don't have the capacity to understand how bad this is. You're just a woman!"
           Diane's voice trembled, "You- you can't say that to me." She was on the verge of tears.
           He looked at her in angry disbelief. Diane could see his thoughts playing across his face. Something along the lines of, I can say whatever I want to you, woman, and how dare you question that!
           "I- I don't like the way you're talking to me, and I think you need to calm down.", Diane continued.
          Jack stared at her, but it wasn't just a stare. It was fire and ice. The ice his stare seeped through her skin and chilled her bones. The fire burned her face and she felt it turning bright red. Then all at once, lightning fast, he shot across room to where Diane was and slapped her.
          They both stared at each other. Jack looked even more horrified by his actions than Diane. He slowly backed away from her. It didn't seem that he could speak, but his face looked so apologetic that saying sorry would be unnecessary.
           Diane looked into his eyes and could see that he regretted what he had done. Her face hurt and she was sure that it would be severely swollen soon, but she ignored that. She started to walk toward him. She wanted to comfort him. Wanted to let him know that she was okay. She reached out to hold him, but he flinched away. They stared at each other again. Diane could see the tears welling up in his eyes. She tried to hold him again, but this time he pushed her arms away and dashed out of the room. Diane heard the front door open and then close.
She sat down on the bed in shock and confusion. What had happened to her Jack? How had he become so violent? Diane refused to let herself jump to conclusions. She told herself that this would all blow over and that it would never happen again.
That was the first of many nights Jack came home drunk.