Lox's POV...

Alec's crying again. He's been crying since Friday when mom left us. Dad says we're not allowed to cry or we'll get the belt. "Alec, shh. Please be quiet before dad hears you."

"Why did she leave? She didn't say goodbye to me, what did I do?"

"You didn't do anything. Maybe it was because of me. I don't know what I did either, but you can't cry, not when we're home."

I sit on the bed beside him and he leans into me and I wrap my arm around him. "It's you and me now Alec, I'll take care of you." Moms last words to me, reminding me to take care of my brother, echo through my head.

"What did I say about crying?" Dad busts the door open with a belt in his hands. I hold Alec tighter and try to push him behind me when dad makes a loud "whap" sound with the belt. The look on Alec's face is pure terror and right then I decide that dad will never lay a finger on him as long as I'm here to protect him.

Dad comes near and I push Alec back and stand up between the both of them. "Leave him alone dad, he's sad is all."

The anger on my fathers face radiates through his whole body and a second later he takes me by the back of my neck and slams me up against the wall, my head making a dent in the sheetrock. That's going to leave a mark and I'm going to school for the first time tomorrow.

"It's Jack to you," he seethes.

What? Why am I supposed to call him Jack now?

"Lox? Wake up B, I'm here, you're okay." Greya's voice. What's she doing here?

This doesn't make sense. "Whap!" The pain, ahh! The burning pain from the belt whipping my bare back makes me wish I wore a shirt but I was about to go to bed before this happened.

"I think he's having a seizure. Liam, help me roll him onto his side. He's arching his back too much. B, you're alright."

Greya again. Am I having a seizure? What's happening to me?

"Alec hurry up and eat or we'll be late for the bus," Jack won't be happy and he'll make us walk to school so I'm trying to get us out the door as quickly as possible.

Alec spills his juice on the floor and I hurry to clean it. "I got this," I tell him.

"What did I tell you about making a mess?" Jack picks me up from the floor by my neck. That's his go to and I'm relieved he hasn't crushed my windpipe by now. His breath already smells like alcohol and it's barely morning.

My hoarse voice manages to tell Alec to go outside for the bus. He doesn't need to see what Jack might do next.

Jack pins me against the counter. My ribs take the brunt and I can barely breathe.

"Weak, that's what you are by playing that stupid sport instead of football," he releases his grip and I fall to the floor panting.

"Greya? Why's he yelling out like that? I've never heard him do that during a seizure."

Alec? What's he talking about? Go out to the bus!

"He hasn't had two seizures one after the other like this either, has he?"

Greya? Damnit! Why can't I see her? I don't want Jack to find her.

"Becker? You sorry excuse of a..." His fist plunges into my side. I didn't even see him coming.

I'm in the kitchen. Now the hallway. He's just about pushed me down the stairs. Above my collarbone burns and blood is dripping down my chest while Jack tries to hit me with his broken vodka bottle again but I move out of the way just in time....

"Lox, come on handsome, you need to wake up!"

Who's touching me? I can't see you. Please Jack, stop!

"B, wake up!"

I shoot straight up and open my eyes, quickly scanning my surroundings for Jack. Where the heck am I? I catch a glimpse of someone's hand moving towards me and force myself backwards until the back of my head hits a wall. Something's wrong with one of my arms and leg, they won't move. Where's Jack?

"B, look at me," a soft voice speaks.

I find myself scanning the room again trying to make sense of everything. I wasn't here a moment ago. Alec and Greya are here, it's not safe.

Alec approaches me and I back up against the wall again. I'm scared, not of Alec, I shouldn't be. He looks much older to me though.

"Liam, don't move any closer, he's afraid of us touching him," Greya nearly whispers.

"He's remembering the bad stuff. I knew this therapy was a terrible idea," he says to Greya.

I don't feel so well.  No one touch me, please. Why does he look older? I was bleeding. Am I bleeding?

I use the only hand that I can move and lift my shirt, looking for any signs of blood...nothing.

"Alec?" I ask him because I'm not sure that he's real or not.

Him and Greya both give each other a quizzical look. I'm obviously missing something.

"B?" Greya softly says my nickname and reaches her hand out towards me and I flinch again but she holds it there. I stare at it for a minute wondering if I should touch her to see if she is real too.

"You're safe, I'd never hurt you," she says. I've heard her say that to me before. She is safe, I'm safe with her.

"Great, he doesn't remember the present but he's remembering the past now!" Alec's upset with me. I need a moment to figure out what's going on so I close my eyes while slowly sliding my hand into Greya's.

Her hand is warm and soft and her fingers gently wrap around mine. I'm safe.

"Give him a few minutes Liam. I think he was having nightmares or flashbacks and now he's trying to figure out what's real. Is that what's happening B?"

Is that what I'm doing? Breathe, that's what I need to do. Take a few deep breaths and try to think about where I am now. I'm with Greya and Liam. Liam is Alec. I was shot and my left side is mostly paralyzed. Jack is dead.

I open my eyes again. Greya is trying to give me some space. I'm holding her hand and she isn't trying to get any closer. Her beautiful green eyes are drowning in unshed tears. I've worried and scared her. Liam too.

"I'm s...sorry. I know where I...I am n...now Liam," I try to reassure him.

"Yeah, we'll you scared the shit out of me. What happened? Are you okay," his voice goes from frustrated to concerned in the same sentence.

"All th...these memories of Jack c...came to me at once," I think that's what happened anyway.

"You also had two seizures in a row. They were short but damn!" Liam says.

Greya hasn't said another word. I flinched from her, something I used to do and now I understand why. She needs to know I'm not afraid of her.

" I n...now know why I always g...go to bed wearing a shirt," I attempt a playful smile to lighten the mood.

That backfires when a tears falls down her cheek. "I n...need y...you to hug me Greya," I say instead.

"Are you sure," she sniffs.

"I'm always s...sure with y...you. Now come h...here," I pull her hand towards me.

She tentatively wraps both her arms around me and I pull her as close as humanly possible to me.

"I'm s...sorry I flinched away l...like that, and I c...can't promise it won't h...happen again, but please promise m...me you won't back away, that you'll r...reach out and hold m...me anyway."

Jack's abuse used to happen out of nowhere, at any time, any day, no particular reason other than to inflict pain on me. My memories of him have just come crashing back and I hate to admit that I'll probably always fear physical contact in some way shape or form. I never want Greya giving up on me because of it.

"Chase! Um i...is h...he at his friends house?" I hope he is and didn't hear what I just went through.

"Oh good, he's back to normal. I'll leave you two alone now while I go get some fresh air," Liam says and leaves the room.

"Y...you still w...want me to live with y...you?" I try joking with Greya again.

She leans back and gives me the stink eye. Not in the mood for jokes, I don't blame her I guess.

"I didn't know what to do. You weren't answering us, then you'd thrash around and yell out, followed by two ten second seizures. I wanted to help you but didn't know how," she says.

"Hey," I reach up and cup her face in my hand.

"We'll f...figure this out."

"I know. I don't like that you're reliving those terrible memories though. It's like he's hurting you all over again and I can't stop him... again."

"I know and I...I'm sorry to put y...you through this too. I'm r...remembering a lot now, s...so the therapy is working. Can y...you hang on with m...me a little longer?"

"Of course I can. I'll do what ever you need me to do."

"Well, it's f...four in the mourning, so what I need y...you to do is lay here with m...me and snuggle up as close as we can so w...we can get some s...sleep," I wink at her and smile. I need to make the air around us lighter and try and forget about Jack for a few hours while I cuddle up next to my girl.

She lays down beside me and I pull her close to spoon her.

"This I can do, all day and night if we need to," she chuckles at me and my arm holds her tighter. She fits perfectly against me and I'd lay with her all day and night too if we could.

I'd like to tell her I remember almost everything now. I'm not quite there yet and there's still one important event I'm not sure I want to remember but know I need to. Jack did so many horrendous things that no father or guardian should ever do to a kid or even a teenager. Greya knows only a few of the times I was tormented by him and if she knew the rest, I'm not sure how she'd handle it. I'm not sure how I'd handle her knowing when I'm only now realizing that the abuse I received from him wasn't my fault. Sometimes I wish I was stronger and fought him off and now I wish I sought out someone to help me and maybe avoided being shot. All I know is I can't turn back time or have a do over. I can remember who I am and learn from my mistakes and hopefully make amends with my past and with my friends.

If everyone can deal with me just a little longer, I know all the pieces will come together soon. I hope.