Lox's POV...

I messed up.

More than messed up. I probably ruined what little good I had going.

I've embarrassed myself and not because of my handicaps this time. And I've upset the one person who's shown me so much kindness. The one person who helps me feel any normalcy when I'm anything but normal.

"Lox, we're going to be late," Liam walks into my room and sees I'm still lying in bed still wearing my hand and foot splints.

"I...I'm n...not g...going t.tt..to class."

"Oh. So today you're deciding it's better to stay in and rest? Are you feeling sick? Are you having a hard time getting up?" I shake my head no.

"Okay, come on then, I'll help you with some stretching and exercises." He brings my AFO and my cane over to my bed.

"N...no."

"What do you mean, no?"

"I...I f...fucked u..up."

"Yeah, you did, and the only thing to do now is to get to class and apologize to her."

I see he's not going to sugar coat this. Good.

"Sh...she'll b...be upset w...with m..me."

"Honestly, I don't think she's capable of that." I laugh to myself, thinking he's probably correct.

He begins loosening the straps to my foot splint  and lifts my leg. Of course my muscles now spasm because all I've been doing is lying here for the past few hours, sulking.

"Jesus, Lox. Your muscles are locked up! You need to stretch more when you wake up."

I can put up with Liam's disappointment but not Greya's.

"I...I know w...what I...I n..need t.t.to do," I growl.

He ignores my attitude and tries stretching my leg. It's  stuck in a bent position while my quad and hamstring continue spasming. My foot drop pronounced more than usual. This is exactly why I should end things with Greya before anything really begins.

"L...leave m...me h...here. B...better if I...I d...don't s...see her."

"Better for who? You or her?"

"Ah! D...Damnit!" He manages to straighten my leg and it hurts like hell.

"Sorry."

He's stretching my ankle and moving my foot around now.

"B...better for b...both."

"You really think it's better for you? Because the way I see it, she's made you happy this last week, you've met new friends, and you haven't had a seizure or muscle spasms like this in days."

He's got a point. I want her in my life, I really do. Maybe I need her but she sure as heck doesn't need me. No one needs this. Liam's now going to be late for his own class because of me.

"B...better f..for her th...then."

"I don't believe that and neither do you." He finishes with my leg and I stretch my left arm and hand on my own.

"And how do you know what's better for her when you've barely given her a chance?"

I sit up and bring my legs over the side of the bed. All my limbs shaking at once. This is my life. Damn brain injury. Damn stroke.

"Th...this is m...me. Every m...morning. Sh...she c...cant s...see m...me like th...this."

"I'm not telling you to jump into bed together! I'm telling you to give her a chance to get to know you better and you get to know her. Let her decide for herself what she wants."

"If I..I let h...her in I...I d...don't w...want t...to l...lose her. M...mom l...left because of th...this." I show him my shaking limbs.

He sighs.

"Mom didn't leave because of you."

"Y...yes sh...she d...did. Sh...she couldn't l...look at m...me. U...unless th...there's something y...you're n...not t..telling me?"

He sighs again. "No, there isn't. And it's not your fault she left us. She was mentally ill. We're better off without her anyway."

That's what he always says when I bring up our mother.

"Greya isn't anything like our mother, Lox."

"M...maybe n...not."

He's patient while I finally get myself standing and go to the bathroom to wash up. When I get to the kitchen, he has a plate of scrambled eggs and toast waiting for me.

I sit up at the counter and slide my plate closer. "I...I'm s...staying h...home today."

I've never heard him sigh at me so many times in one day.

"Fine. But for the record, I don't like leaving you here alone and I think you're making a mistake not showing up to class today."

"I..I know." That's all I say, because I do know I'm making a mistake. Greya deserves an explanation for my outburst, she also deserves a friend who isn't as messed up as I am.

I don't like being alone either because having a seizure while I'm alone scares me. But, I feel fine, no strange auras or lightheadedness. I'll be fine here alone.

"I have two classes today. Text me if you need anything."

I nod with a mouthful of eggs.

After he leaves, I go to stand up and my leg doesn't want to straighten again. Great! I cant walk like this and my stupid left arm can't help carry my weight either.

I lower myself down onto the floor and butt scoot towards the living room until my back is against the couch. I need to stretch more. My physical therapist will help me with some new techniques Wednesday, but it does me no good for today. Every time I lean forward to stretch, my hamstring starts jumping around like crazy.

There's no way I can sit like this all day. Massaging my leg with only one hand isn't very helpful either, but that's all I can do. Push through the pain, keep stretching and massaging until I can straighten out my leg again.

After about an hour, my leg feels somewhat normal, so I get up and use some of my lifting weights. May as well do some PT at home since there's nothing else to do.

Why did I say those things to Greya? Deep down I know the answer. I shouldn't have said them though. She's been nothing but genuine to me. She's helped me not pitied me. But why? What if this isn't real? Or what if it is and she eventually becomes tired of me. I don't want to be an embarrassment for her either. She's our school's most talented women's soccer player and I'm the crippled mute guy, at least that's how everyone sees me. Everyone except Greya and it's difficult to believe she's real. I'm not a good guy, if I was, my former friends would've visited me in the hospital and my mother wouldn't have left. So there must be an alternate reason for why Greya wants to be my friend.

Knock, knock, knock, "Lox?"

Greya? What's she doing here? She should be in class.

I grab my forearm crutch because I don't trust my cane if I can't trust my leg, and I limp to the door.

I open the door and she's standing on my front steps, some of her long hair hanging out of place, her breathing's heavy and her green eyes glistening with tiny streaks of red. She's been crying again. That's another thing, I want to know what I keep doing to make her cry. Well, my outburst yesterday might be a reason.

"Hey," she shyly says.

"H...hey." I move to the side so she can come in.

I don't see her car in the driveway. "D..did y...you w...walk h...here?"

"I jogged actually. I needed some air and jogging helps." My staring probably doesn't help but I can't believe she's here.

She follows behind me to the living room. I take a seat onto the couch first. She has a puzzled look, and I don't blame her.

"You didn't show up to class and you didn't answer my texts, so I was worried. When I saw Liam he told me you were here."

I stay quiet.

She takes a seat next to me. "Please say something," she whispers.

"I'm s...sorry f...for yesterday. I d...didn't m...mean t...to s...say those th...things."

"It's ok, I understand why you said them."

I scrunch my brows.

"It's n...not ok. I...I w...was harsh a...and r...rude after y...you h...helped m...me."

I turn my body on the cushion so I can face her and she does the same. She's so beautiful and I'm....

Hopeful, confused, angry, ashamed, and I need her.

"H...half m...my b...body doesn't w...work. M...my other h...half sometimes sh...shakes. I...I h...have seizures a..and I...I st...stutter and...."

Her hand reaches up and cups my cheek and I immediately stop talking. I've gotten myself all worked up and now she's touching me.

Her hand is soft and gentle. Her fingers lightly graze my skin and I automatically hold my breath. What is she doing?

"Just Breathe," she softly says, sending me into another one of those episodes I had yesterday.

We're facing each other, sitting on a couch in a room I don't recognize. Stunned frozen by her sudden touch, I can't move her hand away.
"Close your eyes," she says. Her soft hand still rests on my cheek. Her hand feels warm and inviting and my eyes hesitantly close.
"You're safe with me, B, can you feel it? I will never hurt you,"

"Lox?"

I open my eyes and blink a few times. Why does this keep happening, none of it makes sense. Just goes to show her how screwed up I am.

"I...I'm a m...mess." Her hand still cupping my face , I lean into her palm, convincing myself that what I feel is real. She's real, and I'm petrified that I'll screw this up.

"I'm not going anywhere." She says it like she's just read my mind.

She lowers her hand back onto her lap and I already miss that warm feeling against my skin.

"And I don't pity you. I like you Lox and I want to be your friend if you'll let me?"

Of Course I want that too. It's that I don't really know how to let her or why she wants this.

"Y...you c...called m...me 'B' w...when w...we first m...met. W...why?"

She's shocked I've asked her that, but I need to know why I've heard her call me that and why it makes her tearful.

"Because your beautifully handsome, and brilliantly smart, and you're the bravest person I know."

I didn't expect that to be her answer. I'm unsure what I was expecting.

"Y...you th...think I'm a...all th...those th...things?"

"I don't think, I know. And if you give me some time, I'll show you."

"I...I'm not w...what y...you th...think. I c...can't d...do a l...lot of th...things a f...friend sh...should d...do. I...I n...need a lot of h...help sometimes, it's n...not f...fair t...to y...you."

It's not fair to her. I can't drive, I can hardly walk. I can't help her with a lot of things and friends are supposed to help each other. She'd always be the one helping me, a one sided friendship.

"You are those things Lox, and you will be a great friend and you'll teach me how to help you. We'll take it one day at a time. Keep learning from each other."

"You have super powers like Chase says remember? And I'm going to help you find them," she smiles.

I can't help but smile back. Somehow I did something to deserve this amazing girl in my life. Whatever it was I'm grateful.

She suddenly gets up off the couch. "Will you come to my game tonight? I'll play better knowing you're there."

My eyes widen at her. She's full of surprises. If she wants me at her game, I'll go. That's what friends do, right? Show up and support each other. I can do that.

"Y...yeah I'll g...go," I smile.

"Good. And if you're up for it after, you and Liam can come over for pizza?"

Her eyes are glistening with hope. How could I say no to her.

"W...we'd l...like th...that."

She looks ready to leave so I attempt to get up and walk her to the door like a gentleman, except my damn leg wants to act up again.

I glance up at her and find that she's holding her hand out for me and smiles at me like it's totally normal that she's helping her friend get up from the couch.

No doubt this is the norm for me, and she insists we be friends, so inevitably this will be her normal too now, I guess. I'm deciding to give it a chance.

I reach out and hold onto her hand, allowing for her support while my shaky leg decides to hold my weight, and surprisingly I don't feel ashamed having her help. It feels nice having someone other than Liam care about me for a change. Greya doesn't mind or show me any pity about it either.

She calls me "B", and I already think the nickname's growing on me.

She wants me to believe this is real, and for her, I'll try my damn best.