Just look

"Sure! Do you wanna change the hour or does it stay the same?" I Asked
"Change the hour please. Moloch is also being pissy" responded Lucifer

"..."
"..."
"Meh ."
"Wait you aren't surprised!?"
" beelzebub just said that I've gotten bigger since the last time it saw me when it came out of my vanity mirror. What was I supposed to expect."

Here in the wild we have a male Homo sapiens sapiens trying to begin a relationship with a female of his kind. But it has reached a stage of his development where if he has a chance to mess up, there's a 85 % chance he will. He has asked the female if they can get something to drink. But the female just looks at him and he looks at her. It is something completely normal. We will never know if she said yes because she will probably answer by a text.

Ironically as I'm writing this it's May 14th. " I am so stressed right now... I wish I had something to make me relax." I said exhausted because of work. I open my door and find... SEBASTIAN MICHAELIS?!? " Wait did my cat give birth or anything..???" " Sadly she's still pregnant but someone said that if I became your personal butler he'll give me kittens" " ok...  Your first order is to bring 3 homeless kittens and keep them"

" time to get Sky" said death itself  "So why are the phantom thieves kidnapping me.?" " Easy! You are suspected of corrupting people's hearts. If you remember Haru and Kuro, that is" " Listen, I didn't do it and if I did it was an accide-" I said before getting interrupted. " And death is carrying me. I honestly don't care what happens at this point just get me a churro and I'll obey your every order" " You're selling your soul for a measly churro?" " and 39 boxes of Pocky"

" SOMEONE SPELLED IN BLOOD THAT WE'RE NEXT!!' And I think it's jimmy's..." " I don't give a fuck so: IF YOU WANNA KILL ME DO IT NOW!!!"

" Thank you for rescuing me-" " GALILEO FÍGARO WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME"

" I'm not mad. Just disappointed. Bitch."

" So Sky, what do you do before I come to rescue you every day?" Asked the hero Kyojin . The size increasing hero which I'm friends with. His mom always tell me : ' HE BETTER ASK YOU OUT SOON. I WANT MY CHINESE GRANDKIDS' " Easy! First I wake up, I shower if I'm not late, I brush my teeth, get dressed, grab my axe and it's case so I can make music, get kidnapped by a villain, become their psychologist for a while because I'm cheaper than therapy, wait for someone to rescue me because I'm strong but too weak to break vibranium and get a ride home from you."

" Yess. I don't have to take developmental biology. Anyways I should probably find somewhere to run" I said going outside I bumped into someone, or something but if it's a robot they still matter " I'm so sorry. Wait can you tell me what happened first?" I said " Human Sky. I am deeply sorry for this. But you are the only one who treated us machines as nicely as you humans treat your species. We will protect you to repay your kindness" wrote the android in a piece of paper " what's your name then? I want to know who saved me" " I am 3b" and a beautiful friendship was formed that day

" By the way, what's your name? I'm Jay" " I'm sSky.Nice to meet you, Jay." Promise me you will never leave me Sky" " ok" as the child grew many things happened. Jay stayed single, she became a he, and he made me a body to bring me to reality. Turns out that a little imagination is important for a great life

" Why did I kidnap this one. Why didn't I kidnap the baby. Why is she so gay. Why. I'm not gonna see my twin again. I hate Stockholm syndrome. Mikasa-senpai will never notice me after this" I said rocking myself as the princess searched for me " Come out~" " I GIVE IN. JUST LET ME SEE MY FAMILY... AND MY BEST FRIEND MIKASA. SHE OWES ME 20 SILVER COINS" " Deal"

" I'm actually lust? Well I'm just glad I'm important"

" Can I rub your belly tho?" Cerberus just rolled over " YEEEEEEES"

" A SPATULA DOES NOT COUNT"  " WELL IF YOU HAVE ENOUGH STRENGTH YOU CAN KILL SOMEONE WITH IT SO IT DOES"
"HOW AND WHY DID YOU DIE WITH THAT SPATULA" " I DON'T KNOW I JUST PANICKED"

Pennywise killed me. Enough said