Ashaangi SS Bewitched

Chapter Forty Five

Ashwin hummed to himself as he prepared masala bread toast for breakfast. He was so engrossed with cooking that he failed to listen Sivaangi hopping down the stairs. He didn't realize her presence until he felt her hugging him from behind.

A smile curled on Ashwin's lips when he felt Sivaangi's arms around him. With a teasing smile, he asked, "Yenna, madam ena miss paningala ila pasi ah?"

(Did you miss me or were you just hungry?)

There was a glint of mischievousness in his voice, but Ashwin realised that Sivaangi was not paying attention. No, rather, she was hugging him very tightly He frowned and tried to pull her to his front but she shook her head and continued to hug him.

Ashwin felt that something was bothering Sivaangi. So, he didn't fight it. Rather he stood still, giving her comfort in whatever ways which he could. He can clearly feel that she was disturbed but couldn't put finger on Few minutes passed by and Sivaangi slowly pulled back from Ashwin. Taking this as a chance he turned over and looked at her with concern.

Gently grabbing Sivaangi's chin, Ashwin lifted her face up and stared into her eyes. With a soft voice, he asked, "Yenna ma achu?"

(What happened?)

Sivaangi stared into Ashwin's expectant eyes. He studied her face and then softly caressed her cheek. With a soft sigh, she closed her eyes and turned from him for a second before facing him.

Sivaangi's lips quivered as she tried to shift her thoughts into words. Sensing her, Ashwin pulled her closer to him, side-hugging her. She heaved a deep sigh and leaned against him comfortably.

Ashwin wanted Sivaangi to know that he was there for her. He gently ran his hand up and down her arm. Slowly easing herself, she looked up at him with slightly welled up eyes.

"Ashwin" Sivaangi gulped, "Enaku-enaku- enaku theriyala yepdi idh-adhu-"

(I-I-I don't know how to proc-I mean-)

Ashwin could see Sivaangi struggling to get it out of her system. He was not sure what it is. So, he shushed her, gently wrapped his arm around her shoulder and guided her to the couch in the living room. He made her sit down and then he took her hand in his.

"Sivaangi" Ashwin placed his palm on Sivaangi's cheek and asked softly, "Ena ma achu?"

(What happened dear?)

Maybe that was all Sivaangi needed to hear. She took a long deep sigh and hugged Ashwin. He was quick to wrap his arm around her waist, pulling her closer. He swayed her in his arm, comforting her in his own way.

"Ashwin" Sivaangi rested her chin on Ashwin's chest and looked up at him.

"Sivaangi, onnu sollata?" Ashwin continued swaying them. She nodded at him.

(Shall I tell you something?)

"Sivaangi naale ellarukum avaloda siricha mugam matum dha ellarukum nyabagam varum. Aana nee epovum apdi iruka person kedaiyadhu. Unaku inoru side iruku. Adha romba koncham per dhan pathrukanga. I think I have the privilege of being one among them"

(Sivaangi everyone looks at you as some happy-go-lucky girl who always smiles. But very few know about your other side. I think I have the privilege of being one among them)

Ashwin pulled back and placed his palm on Sivaangi's cheek,

"Enaku puriyudhu you are fighting within yourself. Unoda dilemma, self-doubt and insecurity una voice out panna vida matendhu. I don't know what it is but I want you to close your eyes, take a deep breath and think. Whatever that's holding you back, adhula irundhu overcome pani varadhukaana strength unakullaye iruku"

(I can understand that you are fighting within yourself. Your dilemma, self-doubt and insecurity aren't letting you voice out. I don't know what it is but I want you to close your eyes, take a deep breath and think. Whatever that's holding you back, I know you have the strength within yourself to overcome it)

Ashwin hugged Sivaangi again, "Adhu vara naa ipdi dha unna kattitu iruka poren" He declared and swayed her along with him earning a small smile from her.

(I'm going to keep you in my arms until then)

Sivaangi closed her eyes and let herself go in Ashwin's arm. He was right. She has the strength in her to fight her own demons. Few minutes went by. Ashwin was little anxious but he didn't show it. He just hugged her closer to him.

Sivaangi, on the other hand, took her own time to compose her thoughts. Am I worthy & Do I deserve this were the two ultimate questions that weighed her down. She looked back at her life, the words of her closed ones, the reality she has witnessed herself. Her eyebrows scrunched as she tried to push back the painful memories. Echoes from the past reverberated in her eyes and she tried to think of the moments she proved them wrong.

Tears stinged the corners of Sivaangi's eyes as finally a smile bloomed on her lips. Involuntarily, her hold on Ashwin tightened as she buried her face on his torso. He was quick to rub her back and kissed her head.

Ashwin's heart warmed when he saw a bright smile on Sivaangi's face as she pulled back from him. She wrapped her one arm around his neck as she kneeled on the sofa.

"Ashwin, Abin anna call panaru" Sivaangi beamed, "I'm singing for AR Rahman!"

(Abin bro called)

Ashwin's eyebrows bounced as a wide smile broke out on his face. He yelled in excitement as he took Sivaangi in his embrace.

"I knew it! Oh my god, I knew it!"

What should Sivaangi get happy for now? That she got to sing for the music maestro or that she was lucky enough that she has found someone who would put her success above everything to spend the rest of her life with? The excitement and happiness on Ashwin's face was overwhelming.

Sivaangi shrieked out of her reverie when she felt herself being picked up in the air. All she could hear was Ashwin's celebratory yelp as he took her in his arms. She dangled her legs in mid-air as she laughed.

A constant smile stayed on Sivaangi's lips when Ashwin went on and on about how talented she was and how he knew she would surely get selected right from the day she auditioned. He was happy and proud and that reflected in his whole demeanour.

When the excitement died down a little, Ashwin asked if Sivaangi has let her family members know about this.

"Inum ila. Enaku Abin anna sonnadhum epdi process pananum ney theriyala" Sivaangi sighed and then looked at Ashwin, "Aana, enaku ongata varanum nu thonuchu. I wanted to be in your arms. Adhan ongata vandhen"

(Not yet. When Abin bro called, I didn't know how to process it... But I wanted to come to you. I wanted to be in your arms. So, I came to you)

What more Ashwin needed to hear? His heart swelled with immense love for Sivaangi. He didn't hesitate to grab her by her neck, lean in and kiss her. She was happy to kiss back as she placed her hand on his arm.

Once they composed themselves, Ashwin said, "Seri, nerama kelambalam iruttura munna"

(Okay, we should leave before it gets dark)

Sivaangi frowned, "Yean? Two days irukadha dhane plan?"

(Why? We planned for two days stay right?)

"Sivaangi" Ashwin cradled Sivaangi's face, "Ivlo periya vishayatha unn family ta nee nerla share pananum nu unaku aasai irukum nu enaku theriyum. Ipo namma inga irundha nee return Chennai pora vara sollama unoda excitement ah adaki vachute irupa. Adhu vendam"

(I know you desire to let your family know about this huge thing in person. If we stay here then I know you will bottle up your excitement and not convey about this to your family until you reach Chennai. I don't want that)

Sivaangi's lips curled while Ashwin continued,

"Namma ipo kelambalam. Naa adhuthu Chennai kandipa varuven una paaka, seriya?" Sivaangi nodded and Ashwin added, "Adhu ilama, nee yedhu naalum first Harish kita dhan first solluva. He must have been equally anxious as you ever since that audition day. Ena vida, yean, una vida, avan dhan sandhosam paduvan. Avana wait panna vaika vendam"

(We will leave now. I will come to Chennai to meet you for sure, okay? ... Besides, you used to tell everything to Harish first. He must have been equally anxious as you ever since that audition day. More than me, even more than you, he will be the happiest for you. Let's not make him wait)

Sivaangi's eyes welled up as she thought about her brother. That man was the sole reason she even agreed to sing under the pseudonym Sivani. It was Harish's stubbornness that made Sivaangi to give a chance to singing. Initially he took her for all her recordings and on nights when she broke down, it was he who gathered her in his embrace. That man made her of what she was today.

Sivaangi gulped the lump in her throat and looked at Ashwin, "Naa romba lucky la avara mathiri Anna kedachadhuku"

(I'm very lucky to get a brother like him)

Ashwin agreed and hugged Sivaangi. The couple basked in each other's warmth before starting to pack up. When she was nearly done packing, he made her sit down on the bed and sat next to her.

"Adhu, amma ku nee singer nu la ipo theriya vendam ma. Aprm ah sollikalam"

(That, its best if my mother doesn't know that you are a singer. We will reveal it later)

There was hesitation in Ashwin's voice and understanding his stand, Sivaangi agreed. He gave her a weak smile and took their bags down. She sighed and shook her head before following him down.

The return trip to Coimbatore was filled with their usual banter and vibing to travel playlist songs. They chatted their way to Coimbatore airport and he parked the car in the parking lot.

Sivaangi fisted Ashwin's t-shirt and pulled him for a kiss. What started as a soft kiss turned intense as their lips fought for dominance. It took everything in him for him to pull back when he realized they were in the parking lot. He breathed heavily as he rested his forehead on hers. She closed her eyes, relishing his presence.

Ashwin placed a quick kiss on Sivaangi's forehead before they pulled back. He threaded his fingers through her unruly hair. Could be a week or a month; He doesn't know when he would meet her again. He pursed his lips and grabbed her face.

"Romba miss panna poren de unna"

(I'm going to miss you a lot)

Sivaangi tried to ignore the stirring in her stomach when Ashwin addressed her as 'de'. Sure, her brothers and friends have called her that way but this was the first time Ashwin used this endearment and she loved it. She saw his lost face that looked hardened.

"Ashwin" Sivaangi placed her palm on Ashwin's cheek, breaking him out of his reverie, "Yenna achu?"

(What happened?)

Ashwin wanted Sivaangi to stay with him, at his house, in his room, within his arms. He gulped at the weight of those desire. He wanted to voice it out but he knew it wasn't the right time. It was still early for them. He still hasn't figured out if there were any chances for him in cinema and they have their professional commitments too.

Shaking out of his reverie, Ashwin blinked at Sivaangi with a smile, "Onum ila. Vaa, ma. Flight miss panira pora"

(Nothing. Come, let's go. You might miss the flight)

Sivaangi wasn't convinced but she let this one go. She took Ashwin's hand in hers and kissed his palm. She giggled when he showed his cheek the next moment. She kissed his cheek and pinched his cheek. Smiling, Ashwin waved at Sivaangi as she walked inside the boarding section. With a happy sigh, he went to home.

~ * ~

How's the chapter makkaley? Now you know why Sivaangi was rushing. Any guesses on what's coming next?

I didn't want to repeat their insecurities in words over and over again. With everything said and done, it is still Sivaangi who have to process her hurt, insecurities and dilemma. The same applies for Ashwin too. They both have reassured their partner regarding this already. Also, I don't think I can write emotional writeup now. Hope I didn't disappoint you all with this chapter.

Thank you for reading,

Nan ~