"You are searching for your purpose. Only when you find what you are looking for, will your life lie in front of you."
As I prepare myself for a jump Fortune sayer's words jump in my mind. Purpose, I thought I had one. My purpose is to entertain people. Or at least I thought so. It looks it isn't.

Taking a deep breath I try to find green eyes in the darkness ahead of me. Luce's supposed to be on the other side this tightrope.

My head spins to the voices of audience, Lords and their Ladies, soldiers, workers in banks, shops and museums. People wanted to be entertained, and I gave them that. My purpose.

As my eyes travel from waves of materials, colours, unknown and incoherent faces I catch myself darting to the sand earth below me. The fall would be so painful. My body would tremble, I would probably broke a bone or two, and I could never do what I do now.
Stop. The same voice from seconds ago is now planting wisdom seeds.

I focus on the line in front of me and before I do what I did seconds ago I stand. Slight wind this high hugs my sweaty face and the nape of my neck and I feel it down my hands. It leaves my skin in goosebumps and to shake of nervousness I lift my hands high taking a pose and jump.

Screams ring in my ears but I don't care. My feet touch a wire and I balance myself three metres from the ground. Suprise and yells of approval fill the air and I smile.

This time in darkness I connect with jade green eyes and smile once again. Before coming to them completely I jump once again my body carried by inercion and I catch the wire with my hands. Swinging around it let the wire turn in the air, while my heart tremble. Please don't let me fall.

Hands connect with mine and I no longer hold the wire but flesh and skin. As I let go once again I see white particles flying in the air and Luce shows from the shadows. He catches me again and crowd yells. But that is not everything. As I feel Luce's hands swing I'm in the air once again and I'm balancing a split in the air before I land in the darkness.

This time blue eyes are connected with mine. When light sparks to life Att and I are holding in the air and people cheer. I wait for a couple of seconds and then I'm falling, like a ball before I split once again, on the ground this time, and Luce and Att land behind me, their tup's vibrating throught the ground.

I jump, turn and freeze in the midair held by their hands.

Then, as my eyes search crowd once more, and they are mass of people clapping and yelling I ask myself once more.
Purpose? This must be it.

I'm on the ground and we bow, before Gale jumps on the stage closing things off.

"You were good Rav," Luce says as I unwrap my hands.
"You weren't to bad too," I answer as I hear laugh to the left and Att shakes his head.
"Good, and to bad, huh? I wonder what your love language in bed is."
"Don't even go there Att," I try but Luce cuts me.
"You don't want to know, trust me."

I roll my eyes as Att laughs again and go to our water and equipment placement.
"Come one Ravenna, don't leave me on the thread," Atticus catches my hand and I search his blue eyes, and all I'm seeing is electricall pull to mischief.
"Come closer," I whisper, and his eyes sparkle even more, "it's consists a lot of oh yeah, come one, and.."
"You are horrible, I swear," he tries to step back but this time I catch his arm and add one last word. "Harder."
"Oh my sweet mother of God's let me die." He shakes of my embrace and turn to leave, but Ime doesn't leave this easily.
"We will try to be quite but we don't know how things will go."

I shake my head as smile plays on my lips from the words.
"You will kill him Ime," I add as I pour myself a glass of water.
"He will kill himself from the thing that doesn't concern him," Luce says coming to hug me from behind, "but on the other side," his words trail off as his lips connect to skin at the base of my neck.

A sharp exhale leaves my lungs as he laughs from deep inside. "Don't be surprised, love, he always ask me these kind of questions."
"And you do what? Answer? Ignore?" My voice tremble as his hands travel down to my hips.
"Sometimes ignore, sometimes send him to ask you, which he never did, if I my add, sometimes just stare until he leaves. I don't know I get creative."

My breath catches in my throat and he laughs.
"He is bored," he adds and then let me go.
I turn to face him, my hands connecting around his neck and I inch my head so I am looking him in the eyes.
"And we are exciting?"
"To him? Very?" He exclaims and before I manage to say one more thing I'm lifted from the ground and placed on the table, Ime in front of me.
"Let's keep him in wonder," he whispers and I wrap my hands in his hair.
"I think.."
"Ravenna, Luce, Atticus - you were good tonight! No falls like last time. Ravenna you did good on the wire but I saw suspicion before you jumped, we will work on that. Luce I hope you are not wasting your energy." Gale appears behind a curtain and I look at him over Luce'se shoulder. Long green cout is first thing I see, and then I catch his flashy gloves. Next is his thin face and colourless eyes.
"Most certainly not, sir." Luce answers and I nod.
His dark eyes don't go from us as he yells once again.
"Att, show yourself and do some cardio. I won't allow you to be stuff in the act. Work with Ravenna to get some graciness in your movements."
"I don't want graciness," he exclaims somewhere from the deep of tent and he shakes his head.
"Don't make me find you, or I will slap you, so Mother of God's."
"Well, shit, you will have to."

I watch as Gale shakes his head and turns from us. "And Ravenna, go see your aunt. She has something for you."
I nod and before I can say anything he is already deep in the shadows.
"So I suppose you will go this moment," Luce starts and I smile tucking him closer so I can get a kiss he promised me before the act.
"Not right away," I whisper and he laughs again and I connect my lips with his.

Minutes later our foreheads are connected and I still hug him around the neck.
"Do you think this is our purpose?" I ask and I feel his forehead narrowing.
"Purpose? This?" Why that question?"
"I had enlightenment on the wire."
"Well, most certainly not the best purpose but surely not the final one."
I laugh and he looks me in the eyes, separating us. "Now go see your aunt, or we won't have purpose at all."
"But she will only drag how I gained some weight, and how she has to strecth my costumes."
"Well I'm glade she is not my aunt, as always."
"Go die in dark," I hiss and leave his hugg.
"You guys really know how to keep relationship romantic." Att says and I stop looking around.
"Are you really want that conversation right now?"
"Leave him be, Rave," Luce says and I roll my eyes.
"You have a death wish," he says to Atticus and he laughs.
"You too, go die in the dark."

I exhale and leave them behind a curtain as I once again go in front of curtain, public places now empty, only waste left. This tent is skeleton without visitors who make him alive.

As chilly air hugs me on the outside I turn left and go the the red-green carriage trailer where my aunt rests. She never looks at my shows. She doesn't want to look me playing with death. I usually don't mind it, but at the rare moments when I want her to see a new act we designed, or a new trick I learned, it hurts. She is always distant and cold.

I knock once and wait for her answer.
"You have something for me?" I ask as I step in rows and rows of colour.

Her trailer is decorated with materials in all possible colours, designs and prints. My aunt makes all our costumes, design the stage and prompts.

I hug myself as I draw my eyes from the materials and face with Aurelia fonDart. Gale's wife and my guardian.

Her features are partly hidden in the shadows of the drapes but I would recognise her anywhere. Her tall and curvy frame, dark black hair braided on her sides and dresses in one of her designs. She is someone who you would never imagine to be in circus let alone be married to a show runner.
"Ah, darling," she exhales and rise from the chair, "you are alive as I can see. Good, good, come closer let me see you."

I almost laugh at her words. She does this every time. She always checks are all bones where they belong to.
"I'm okay aunt," I try to convince her, but she shakes her head, signaling with her finger to come closer. Exhaling, I let it be and come closer.

Her hands meet with my shoulders, neck, they go to the base of my neck, run in my hair and the around my eyes, ears and down to my decolte. Almost the same places Luce draw his hands.

She continues down my stomach and back, then on my knees.
"In one peace, good." She gestures for me to sit across from her and I look around the trailer covered with all different tailoring things, and somehow squeeze myself on small couch.
"You have something for me?" I try again but she waves with her hand, shaking her head.
"Shhh, let me think."

Once again not surprised with her behaviour I look at table where different magazines from the Capitol rest. She gets her things direct from Capitol, wanting always to be informed about latest fashion. She has friends discussing about that thought the letters.
"Ah, yes!" She exclaims and I jump a bit surprised.
"Yes?" I ask, wanting already to finish with this and go rest. Tomorrow we have to part ways with Lord and continue towards our next town, next Lord and next acts and shows.
"My child, what did Gale told you?"
"That you have something for me," I repeat again and she shakes her head.
"Oh no. Stupid him, it's not something I want to give to you, but I must. You see since you have been with me I gave my money to raise you, Gale taught you everything you know, and now it's expected from me to give you my jewelry. You didn't deserved it, you know that?"

Didn't deserved it.

"Yes, aunt, I'm a are of that. You never miss to point it out." I mutter bitterly.
"So rude. No wonder no one wants you." She waves with her hands and I roll my eyes. Here we go again.
"Point? If no one wants me, then why are you giving me jewelry?" My voice comes out sharp and I see her eyes narrowing. She inches forward, clamping my chin with her hand in a second, bracelets around her wrist clinging.
"Behave! Don't embarrass me!"
I sense anger in her voice and I want to nod, but she is holding my chin too tight.
"Answer me!" I feel her nails dipping in my skin and I say, "Yes aunt. I won't."
"Good," she lets my chin and exhales, "now before you interrupted me so impolitely, I was saying.." she trails off a I stop myself from rolling my eyes.

I let silence drags until she continues again.
"Yes! Jewelry. I have to give you my jewelry because we part our ways with Lord tomorrow, and we will be present for a city tour. You have to look your best."

This time I don't stop myself. I roll my eyes so hard I wonder how they didn't stay backwards. Seconds after I feel stinging pain on my left hand.

Opening my eyes, my jaw falls open as I look at me hand a tailor pin in my skin.
"What is this?!" I yell and she hits me with newspapers.
"Behave! You look stupid! I will not tolerate that kind of behaviour!"

Rubbing my hand I take the pin out and place it on table, mumbling.
"Don't mumble!" She trows her hands in the air, "you will be my end. I don't understand why Elizabeth had you and then left you."
"She didn't leave me, she died. There is difference in that." I say angrily, placing hands int he table between us and rising slowly.
"Yes, whatever. Look your best tomorrow, and come for jewelers in the morning. Bring them to me the same second we leave the town."
"Yes, aunt," I say exhaling.
"Go, go. My head hurt from watching you act so childish."

She takes out the fan and I leave the trailer almost running over the doors. I hear her yelling behind me but I head straight to my, Luce's and Att's trailer and close the door, glade I meet with silence.

That man is right. This can't be my purpose.