The room was white.

The ground was white.

And his surroundings were as blank as a canvas.

Then his lungs were empty

and the oxygen blew away like the many leaves outside.

--

Eren was breathing heavily as he pressed his ear against the basement door and let out a small gasp when he heard something made out of metal thump against the floor and a body hit the ground. He knew he shouldn't be here like Hannes told him but he couldn't help but grin. From all the sounds, he was guessing Levi finally defeated Grisha.

He couldn't wait any longer and crashed through the door with all his strength and broke in, Levi's name forming on his lips and about to curl into a happy, relieved smile.

"Le-!"

He was right; there was a body on the floor, but it wasn't the body he was expecting to see. There were cuts and bruises scattered all over his once perfect, pale skin and dark, crimson blood caked in his hair and chest. His messy black hair looked like the night sky covered in red flames. His piercing, steel grey eyes were lifeless and opened as if he were still alive and his hands were tightened around the grip of a knife.

Eren felt as if the air inside his lungs were blown out him.

"...vi."

Then there was the man who was possibly responsible for this, standing directly in front of him with a shocked expression himself. Eren pressed his teeth together and pursed his lips as he began to yell with many emotions at his father.

"You bastard," he said coldly. "How dare you?"

"Eren, I see we meet again."

"Why...why would you go this far?" Eren asked him with a stern yet shaking voice. "Out of all people, why him? You're the lowest of the lowest, you scum."

"Eren, my son," Grisha started and put his hand on his son's shoulder.

"Don't touch me, you filthy monster," he snapped. "Don't you dare call me that ever again."

"Eren-"

"I hate you."

Eren couldn't think straight as he removed his knife from his pocket and raised it; he was shaking and it was hard for him to breathe. His throat was tight from the tears and his mouth was opened in a silent screen. He felt so much emotions; feelings and thoughts he thought he would never feel. He felt anguish, anger and so much pain.

Seeing Levi's beautiful face in such a state shattered his weak heart; it was like having the world swept from beneath our feet in a matter of seconds then having the non existent but powerful walls of the universe close around you. If only he got here sooner.

Grisha was taken aback and had no time to step back just as the knife was about to sink into his flesh. He was surprised even more when two seconds passed.

Eren did plunge the knife, he stopped just when the tip of the blade was pressed against his skin. Grisha was just about to say something but Eren yelled at before he could.

"Just... leave."

"Eren-"

"I never want to see your pathetic and disgusting face ever again, old man," he snapped.

He looked angered towards Eren but he just nodded and ran from the basement before Eren could have possibly punch him.

After long minutes of nothing but his heavy, ragged breaths, he dropped the threatening weapon and fell to his knees next to Levi's body. He carefully dragged him onto his lap and wept for what seemed like years. He watched as his warm, small tears sprinkled themselves all over Levi's bloody and pale face.

"Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi," Eren kept whispering to himself as if trying to wake him up like he still might be alive. "Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi."

He was too distracted by the man that he didn't even notice the stirring Erwin next to him; he couldn't focus on anything but Levi because he was all that mattered to him. Erwin was just about to say something but let out a soft gasp of terror as his gaze found Levi's body. Eren was gasping too, not of surprise but he was trying to inhale more air; the fact that the man he loved was dead left him breathless. He was shuddering and and tears couldn't stop pouring from his red and tired eyes.

"Eren..." Erwin trailed off.

Eren pressed his head to Levi's and leaned in so that their lips were barely touching. He spoke in a shaking voice that was filled with sadness but anger. Yes, he was mad at the fact that his own father, his own flesh and blood, had done this to him but he was also a 'little' mad at Levi as well.

"You fucking idiot," he murmured as he tasted the salt in his tears. "Idiot... getting yourself taken away from me for no reason."

"Eren," Erwin repeated as he shook his head, "he...he didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Eren said and looked up quickly. "What did he not tell me?"

Erwin looked away shamefully and avoided looking at the younger male.

"Erwin, what did he not tell me?" Eren repeated with a firmer voice.

"He wanted...to avenge you so he went after Grisha with help from a few people."

"Why didn't you tell me!" Eren screamed.

"He didn't say anything about telling you or not. Levi is my best friend and I know for a fact that once he wants something, he'll make it happen. I am so sorry, Eren, I would have told you but... but I thought you already knew," he explained shamefully and honestly.

Eren shook his head shamefully and cried anger filled tears and he lay his head on Levi's chest like he used to when they watched movies together. Erwin watched sadly for a while but soon left, wanting Eren to be alone with Levi for a while. Eren heard yelling and sirens from outside but those sounds were almost hard to notice. He couldn't see, he couldn't hear and he couldn't even breathe properly because of Levi fogging his head. He tried to remember his normally grumpy and apathetic face smile, but he just couldn't get his now blank, lifeless and motionless face out of his mind.

He stayed there for a while, pretending that his heart was still beating and pumping life through him, imagining that his heart was still working which sent steady but quite ba-dumps through his body. He imagined this for a while and for a minute it was like they were real, that his heart was still running blood.

They seemed a little too real and he pulled back suddenly when he heard a cough.

"What..." he trailed off and eyed Levi through his blurry vision.

He still looked the same minutes before but now his eyes were slightly opened in slits and he felt air pass through his chapped and bloody lips.

"Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi, Levi," he started to say again. "Oh my God, Levi."

He began to groan and struggle for breath as he tried opening his eyes a little more. His finger tips started to twitch a little as Eren held them with his trembling hands.

"Er..." he finally managed to whisper after seemed like an eternity, "...en."

"Levi," Eren said back, cradling his pale face. "Oh thank God you're alive."

"What...wait."

"You can tell me later, alright? We need to get you some help."

He gently pressed his mouth to the older male's and kissed him softly as if he were something so delicate like a glass figurine. He was not expecting a response since Levi was in such a bad shape but surprisingly, he felt shaking arms wrap around his neck and the black haired male's mouth part against his.

"Slow down," Eren muttered against his mouth. "You might pass out again."

"No," he protested like a needy and whining child. He seemed so out of character at a time like this.

"Levi," he shuddered, "now isn't the time."

In the end, the shorter male made him promise to give him what he asked later on.

---

Levi now knew how Eren must have felt when he was in the hospital; he had to stay inside and was to remain in bed for a while. All of his friends were worried sick and visited daily, even Mikasa visited and a lot of Eren's friends did too. Eren was glad the love of his life was alive but he was also pretty mad and he made a mental note to slap him hard after he recovered.

He refused to leave his side and since he was staying at the hospital where Erwin and Hanji worked, they both allowed Eren to stay with Levi after realizing what they both had gone through. It was a pretty traumatizing experience for the both of them, but the older male didn't show it so that he wouldn't make Eren worry even more.

"You're out of your mind," Eren told him as everyone gathered around. "So you stabbed yourself so that you didn't have to tell him anything about me?"

"Pretty much."

Levi really did think he was going to die but boy was he wrong; he missed his heart only by a few inches and nearly died of blood loss. It was a difficult task to do even the smallest of movements but he learned to ignore the pain.

"You almost died for my sake."

"Yes. Yes I did."

"I didn't even want revenge."

"Yeah well I did."

"You're unbelievable."

"I did it because I love you," he told him. He cringed when he noticed how cheesy and cliché that sounded and acted as if no one else were there but them. He could have sworn that Mikasa flinched at his words despite not even looking at her.

"You could have at least warned me before you went out on a suicide mission."

"And what difference would that make?"

"Maybe I could have stopped you from bearing all this pain and find other people track him down instead."

Levi grit his teeth and held his hands in tight fists, his knuckles turning a little more white too.

"I want you to rely on me."

"I've already have, countless times. You gave me a home when Hanji wasn't able to and supported the both of us when my job didn't give too much money."

At the mention of her name, Hanji jumped from the crowd of friends frantically. "Actually, I was able too I just didn't want Levi to be lonel-"

"That isn't the point!" Eren said quickly and shot a quick glare towards her. "What I'm trying to say is that my problems aren't yours."

"Eren-"

"I know how stubborn you are," he cut him off and cupped his cheek with a small grin. "So before you do anything absolutely crazy, you need to tell me. I'm not going to tell you to stop doing things like this because I know you won't listen to me anyways; probably even God knows that."

"You make it sound like that's a good thing."

"Depends on the situation," he added.

"I see," Levi said as he tapped his chin with a pale finger. "I understand."

"That doesn't mean you could just go around doing stupid things though."

"Oh come on, Eren!" Hanji exclaimed. "You could trust him not to do that."

"She's right," Erwin added.

"Eren, you sound like his mother," Armin squeaked.

"Shut up. I'm just concerned."

Levi smirked a little. It amused him how Eren seemed to be acting this way because he's never seen him this way before. Well, he wasn't really surprised; he would act this way too if Eren was ever injured again like last time.

He loved how a pure, strong person like him loved a twisted, rude man like himself.

---

AN:

itS GOING DOWN

IM YELLIN TIMBERRRRRRR

that is how you describe this fanfic's current situation in 6 words bc im reaching a permanent writer's block ;-;

which means btl will end next chp

well this fic literally went from

'a tsundere man falls in love??!?!!11! yes ye s shOUJO CHERRY BLOSSOMS!!111!! sliCE OF LIFE FIC'

to

'se EK VENGENCE FOR ER RUN!1! DI e gR 1SH4 DIE1!111!1 COOL SPY MUSIC AND DEATH!!11'

yeah idk what happened okay sorry

well if you enjoyed (which i now doubt due to this fic's storyline atm) comment and vote i guess

~Your Friend Takeshi