I changed the chapter name

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Almost

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Chapter 30: Almost (Aaron's POV)

We stopped snorkeling nearly ten minutes ago, now we're just swimming around the boat while the others still snorkel, getting further and further away from the boat. I tried my best to calm her down during the snorkeling and it worked for the most part. I think she forgot about her fears when she was snorkeling because the first thing she said when we swam back to the boat was, "Everything's so pretty underwater." 

We dropped our gear there and just swam around near the boat. "See," I said, glancing at her. "It wasn't so bad." 

"You're right, it wasn't," she nodded in agreement. 

We did everything we could possibly do. We snorkeled, we floated around, there's not much more to do in the middle of the ocean. "Do you want to get out now?" I asked. 

"Yeah. We can get back on the boat and—" She stopped talking abruptly, her body jerking as if she'd been startled. 

"What?" I watched her warily. 

"I could swear something just touched my foot." 

I glanced at the water from above since neither one of us had our goggles with us. "It was probably just a fish." 

"Yeah," she murmured. "Anyway um, what was I saying? Yeah, we should probably get—" She gasped loudly. 

"What? What is it?" I grabbed her arm as she shifted closer to me. 

"I could swear something just touched my foot, Aaron, I'm not kidding!" 

I sighed, taking a look around. "There's nothing here." 

"I'm telling you we're about to die. And a shark attack is one of the worst ways to go." 

"Vanessa, there's nothing—" 

She screamed, closing her eyes and grabbing onto my shoulders. "Aaron! Something keeps touching my foot, please!" She looked absolutely horrified and she sounded like a child panicking and on the verge of tears. It was cute but I was genuinely worried now at the same time.

"Okay, okay. I'll get us out," I nodded. 

She only grabbed onto me tighter. "Aaron!" she exclaimed through gritted teeth.

"Vanessa, I can't swim if you're—" 

"Aaron!" 

"Okay," I sighed, putting an arm around her waist as she whined, squirming in the water. "If you move to my back, I can swim," I told her. 

She moved around, grabbing onto my shoulders again. As we reached the boat barely in a minute, the thought crossed my mind: 

What if there really is a shark in the water? 

We made it to the ladder and I grabbed her arm, bringing her forward, and then grabbed her by the waist, hoisting her up onto the ladder. She climbed out the fastest I've ever seen her do anything and she looked over the railing immediately, wiping her eyes first. 

I grabbed the ladder and climbed out carefully, looking over the railing as I handed her a towel. She smacked my arm repeatedly, pointing out. I followed her gaze, blinking in confusion. "What?" 

"That's a baby shark!" 

"Vanessa. That's just a fish."

"Really?" She looked closer. 

"Yeah." 

"Oh..." 

I watched her for a minute while she was absentmindedly drying herself off, still looking out into the distance. "It was probably just a fish, Nessa. You just freaked out, but it's fine, at least we're not in the water anymore." 

She stared at me, unblinking. "What did you just call me?" 

"Vanessa." 

"No." 

"What else would I call you?" 

"You..." she paused, thinking about it. She pinched her arm softly and then winced. "Yeah, I'm not dreaming. You just called me Nessa." 

"No, I didn't." 

"Yes... you did." 

Did I? 

She let her hair down, squeezed the water out of it, and then dried it with the towel. She watched me in amusement. "While you think about that, I'll go change," she smirked, brushing past me and going inside. 

I grabbed my towel, drying my arms and then my hair before dropping the towel on the seat. 

Did I really call her Nessa? 

Yeah, I did. And I did right before she fell asleep last night too but then she was unconscious and didn't notice. 

Does that mean she doesn't remember what I said either? 

She came back out a minute later, her hair braided to the side now. "You should change. Doesn't saltwater make people itchy and stuff?" 

"Yeah, sometimes," I mumbled, standing up and taking the bag from her, going to change. I don't know what was happening to me. I've been calling her Nessa, sometimes even in my head, I asked her to be my friend, I admitted to her that I never really hated her. 

None of this should be happening. None of it. 

I came back out and sat on a seat while she stood by the railing, still searching the water. I poked her waist, setting the bag down. 

She jumped, smacking my hand away. "Don't do that. I'm ticklish." 

"That's why I did it," I sighed, grabbing a water bottle and twisting the cap open, drinking some. Once I was done, she took it from me and drank the rest of it down. "You could have taken another one," I pointed out. 

She shrugged, tossing it in the small bin. She sat beside me, resting her elbow on the railing and her head on her closed fist, facing me. I tipped my head back against the railing, turning to look at her. She leaned in a bit, staring at my eyes. "Your eyes look bluer now that we're by the water." 

"Do they?" 

"Hmm. Normally they look greenish hazel. Your hair looks darker too." 

"That's just because it's damp," I shrugged. 

"I've always been jealous of your eyes," she mumbled, brushing my hair back and staring at my eyes a little longer. "They're pretty." 

My eyes scanned her face, lingering on her lips. I blinked, forcing them back up to her eyes. 

Hopefully, she didn't notice. 

"There are a lot of pretty things about you," I replied. 

She chuckled, glancing at the water and then back at me. "You don't mean that." 

"No, I do," I nodded. "Really, I mean that." 

She took in a small breath, her eyes dropping to my lips. Her chest rose and fell a little faster and I too felt like my lungs were running out of air. She held my gaze and whispered, "Sometimes I wish I never met you." 

I shook my head softly. "Nothing would change." 

"No?" 

"No. I'd meet you over and over again if I had. In every lifetime." 

"And why is that?" 

I stopped and contemplated my next words and move but then my head and heart decided: 

Fuck it. 

"I like being around you too much," I admitted, leaning in but barely. 

"Is that so?" 

"Very much so," I whispered, watching as she inched forward. Her eyes dropped to my lips just before mine did the same. I heard her breath hitch in her throat as I hesitantly brought a hand forward, using my knuckles and tilting her chin up softly. I met her eyes one last time. I didn't want to do anything she didn't want me to. 

She barely nodded but she did. 

So I leaned in to close the distance between us. 

"Shit, I almost fell!" 

We both jumped apart, facing forward. I heard her let out a breath while I closed my eyes, turning my head the other way and sighing in frustration. "Fuck's sake," I mumbled. I scratched the back of my neck and then faced forward, noticing Nick, Lyla, and Zach all climbing back on. 

Nick was first. He winced, looking at his foot. 

Both Vanessa and I stared at him. I was definitely glaring. 

"What? I stubbed my toe," he shrugged, grabbing his bag and going into the changing room. 

"Asshole," I muttered, glancing at her. 

She sighed shakily and then stood up, rubbing her palms on the sides of her dress. "I'm going to uh, get some water, yeah, water. I'll um, I'll be right back." 

I nodded. 

She closed her eyes briefly and cringed, walking towards the icebox. 

I tipped my head back, closing my eyes. 

Damn it. I almost had her. I almost kissed her. Almost... 

I stood up, going to the instructor. "How come everybody came out together?" I asked as he dropped his gear in a basket. 

He caught his breath and pointed out. "There is a shark in the water," he explained. 

"What? Seriously?" 

He nodded in that direction. "Look for yourself." 

I saw a hint of a fin before it disappeared. 

So she was right. 

»»————　➴　————««

By the time we got back to the hotel, we still had loads of time until dinner. Vanessa hadn't spoken to me the entire drive back and I didn't make much of an effort either. I had no idea what to say to her. 

Sorry, I tried to kiss you but I think I kind of fucking like you? What am I, in high school? 

"Can I shower first?" she asked softly. 

"Yeah. Of course." 

"Thanks." She took the pajamas she wore last night and went into the bathroom as I fell onto the bed and draped one arm over my eyes. 

Once she came out, she still didn't say a word to me as I went into the shower after her. I took a quick shower and got dressed. I let out a breath as I came back into the room while ruffling my hair. "Vanessa, I know there's still time for dinner, but if you're hungry, we should..." I trailed off, staring at her. 

She was fast asleep on the bed, rolled onto her side, facing my side of the bed with her knees tucked in and her hand under her cheek. Her lips were parted and slightly pouty while she took even and steady breaths. She was completely knocked out. She must have been exhausted from today. 

I glanced at the time. We still had nearly two hours until dinner. I turned the lights off and walked to my side of the bed, lying down. 

There was no divider up right now. And for the first time on this trip, I felt like crossing that line. I felt like putting an arm around her, I felt like pulling her into me, holding her close to me. I felt her crossing that line and every other line, breaking down every wall I have built around me and every wall she has built around her; I felt like breaking all the rules and crossing all the limits. As long as it meant I'd have her. 

I tucked one arm under my head and turned to look at her. Her brows furrowed a bit as she shifted, coming a bit closer. I reached out, pressing down on the frown between her brows, brushing it away. Her eyes squinted open and I suddenly regretted it. But she simply closed them again and scooted closer, falling back asleep in less than a minute. 

One of her arms reached out blindly and she draped it across my abdomen, humming softly in satisfaction and approval only to groan again softly. 

I shifted closer to the middle of the bed, closer to her, and turned my lamp off. 

She rested her head on my chest suddenly, one of her legs going over mine as she clutched my shirt in her fist.

I untucked my arm from under my head and put it around her, gently pulling her hair over her shoulder so it wouldn't soak her t-shirt. I twirled a strand around my finger, closing my eyes and falling into thought. 

I wanted Vanessa. I wanted her, not just to pretend this time. I wanted to leave this job and New York and go around the world. But I wanted to do it with her. I wanted to kiss her, to hold her like this, I wanted to be with her. And if I could, I even wanted to love her.

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Chapter 30

y'all, today I was thinking about my next book which is meant to be Christian and Maya's story and it made me so fucking sad to think about this book ending... like I really really loved writing this book and I don't really want it to end

So I'm telling you guys in advance if I have another idea like this one, I mean like contemporary, Spanish love deception, Hating Game, the Love hypothesis, any lovey-dovey cute books like that 

Then I WILL postpone the next book in the Royal Riders series to write that.

I miss writing travel books and I want to write one again yk anyways

next chapter: alcohol