I settled into lunch between Tim and Jackson as Billy slid across from me. As he relaxed, our eyes met for a moment before we both dropped the connection. It was a split second that sent a blush through me.

"No," Tim murmured between gritted teeth.

"Calm down," I whispered back.

"No," he shot again as he pushed pasta around his plate, "just no."

"Nothing happened," I soothed.

It didn't dissuade Tim's resistance. His fingers gripped his fork with such force that his fingers turned white. Tess slipped a hand to his knee and gave him a knowing smile that seemed to calm him.

"You're not great whisperers," Jackson leaned in close to me as he spoke. He controlled his voice the way his father did. He didn't just manage the volume; he wielded his inflection in a manner that his words would blend into the surrounding conversation while also landing safely in my ear.

"Noted," I murmured.

Pete unified the conversation. He rose above the rest of the chatter to focus on Billy and Tim. "So, what do you two hotshots have cooking?"

"Focusing on the label's artist for now," Tim absently spoke.

"I was thinking about getting back into the studio myself." Billy's eyes flickered to me before dropping quickly.

"You are?" Tim didn't hide the surprise.

"Yeah, I never meant to leave that last album lingering for so long. I meant it to have a follow-up, a conclusion." Billy didn't command the room with his voice when he spoke of himself. He shrunk as his shoulders rounded.

"You got anything written?" One of his other brothers, I think John, asked.

"Oh, bits and pieces; you know, just ideas until I head into the box."

"The box?" I asked. It sounded like a punishment.

"The studio," Jackson whispered.

"Oh, of course." I felt foolish that I couldn't figure that out.

"Any reason you're suddenly inspired?" Tim's voice held thinly veiled contempt.

"Life, love, family," Billy's voice was stronger now, and he slung an arm around Viv, kissing the top of her head.

"Dad," she pulled away as her face flushed.

"Football?" Michael broke up the moment with a caveman grunt of the word.

As if orchestrated, everyone moved at once. Viv and the guys, barring Billy, headed into the living room; the wives started to pick at the dishes strew around.

"You all need help?" Billy offered, pulling a smile to my face.

"No, you get out of here," one woman, I think Abby, shooed.

With little more than a nod, Billy followed the rest of the pack to the living room. Around me, they cleared the table in a blink. It was apparent that this process had been done many times before. I offered to help, but staying out of the way was the best path. Within a half-hour, they cleaned everything up, and the dishwasher was whirring in the background. The ladies settled into cards around the table. I hung out but didn't play. It was nice to be around the chatter.

"Lily, I think I have an extra deck of cards in the basement," Mary smiled after a glass of iced tea tipped across their game.

"Be right back." I hopped up and headed to the basement, but I heard voices as I neared the bottom of the stairs.

"Treat your mother's house with the same respect you treat mine," Billy's voice was calm as he spoke.

"I know, but it's fun to annoy her. She flusters so easily, and it makes me laugh." Remorse filled Viv's voice.

I peeked around the corner to see them sitting across a chessboard as a Gene Vincent album played in the background. I sunk to the stairs as my eyes clung to them. My chest clenched at the scene of father and daughter sharing a chess game.

"You shouldn't laugh at people when they get flustered," Billy scolded. But then he dipped closer to her, "but yeah, your mom is funny when it happens." He let out his own laugh. "So, highlight and lowlight of your week?" It was clear it was a tried-and-true question.

"You answer first," Viv prodded.

Billy let out a sigh as he mulled over his week. "Lily coming into town."

"Highlight or lowlight?" Viv questioned.

"Both." Billy let out a laugh.

My heart stopped for a moment hearing his private admission. I shouldn't have heard it. I shouldn't be eves dropping, but I couldn't move.

"Really? Mom doesn't say very nice things about her." Viv spoke in a distracted tone as she scoped out the game board.

"Your mom doesn't have the best background with Lily. There are some anxieties from your mom toward Lily; some warranted, some not." He was so even with his words, just like my father had always been. I thought it had been wisdom earned by age, but as Billy took on the role, I realized my dad had just been doing his best to set a good example.

"I don't like her," Viv asserted.

"You don't know her. How can you even have an opinion?" Billy's voice was even; the usual defense of my name did not slip in.

Viv sighed, "I found her picture once in a box of your old things and asked Nonna about her."

"Mmhmm, and what did Nonna say?"

"That you and Uncle Tim had been great friends with her. You and her fell in love, but it didn't work out."

"Fair retelling. Sometimes things don't work out. It's neither's fault," as he spoke, he made a move on the board.

"Mom said she broke you. You'll never fall in love because that woman broke you."

"Mmhmm, sounds like your mother. Again, she has a specific view that does not depict the whole reality."

"Daddy," Viv's voice came softly, causing Billy to snap his focus to her. "I want you to be happy."

"I'm happy, Viv."

"No, I want you to be really happy like a pony on your birthday happy."

"One birthday; I don't get you exactly what you want on one birthday, and I never hear the end of it. You know a pony is a lot of work?"

"Yeah, you made the right decision. I don't even like picking up my room. I definitely wouldn't have picked up horse shit."

"Language," Billy scolded. "Make up your own mind about Lily."

"And if my mind doesn't like her?"

"Then you still have to be polite. It seems she may be around a bit more."

"How much more?" An accusing tone curled her words.

"More than not at all," Billy murmured.

"Is she the reason you and Mom broke up?" Viv asked.

"No, of course not. Is that what your mom said?"

"No," Viv admitted. "Do you wish you had married Lily instead of mom?"

"No, never once. Choosing a partner, a lover, or a friend is an important decision. Choosing wrong can make your entire world empty and meaningless. Sometimes those choices make little sense. When I chose your mother, it made little sense. I loved her; she loved me. No one questioned us, but we questioned ourselves. We knew there was a draw, a reason, but until you and your brother came along, it made little sense. Your mother gave my life meaning. Your mother gave me you. I loved her and will love her until my last breath because of that gift."

"But Lily?" Viv pressed.

"Lily," a breath deflated him. "Lily is..." his head shook back and forth at a loss.

"She's your straw," Viv factly stated.

"Straw?" Billy's brow furrowed in confusion.

"You have a lot, Dad," Viv explained. "You have our family, the studio, a job you love. You've filled up your cup with a chocolate malt, but you haven't been able to enjoy it. You need a straw. Lily's you're straw."

Billy's eyes poured over Viv in awe. "When did you get to be so smart?"

"I've been trying to tell you," Viv teased. "But don't worry, I'll still let you win at chess."

"Let me win? Viv Collins, how dare you!" As he spoke, he pulled Viv into his side and let his lips fall to the top of her head. "I love you, Viv."

"I love you too, Daddy."

"Enough about me. What were your highlights and lowlights?" Billy redirected.

Viv took a deep breath, "lowlight, math exam."

"How bad?"

"I'll tell you when I get it back next week, but I can tell you it probably isn't great. But I got the first question right.

"Viv, the first question is your name."

"Yeah, so pretty confident there. Then I spent the rest of the period organizing my life around avoiding math."

"You can't avoid math."

"Dad, I've watched you write the word math on the tip line at restaurants."

"Yeah, math sucks," Billy finally conceded. "So, highlight?"

Viv made her move before adding, "okay, so don't freak out."

"Nothing good ever comes out of your mouth after that phrase," Billy teased.

"A boy asked me out," she sputtered, as though it took all her nerve to spit it out.

"What? Who? What? Wait, who? How old are you? What? No." Billy didn't mask his reaction, and a laugh nearly burst from my lips.

"Dad, I'm fourteen; plenty of girls are dating and have boyfriends." Viv had clearly thought of her argument.

Billy tried to calm himself. "Boyfriend, wait, did you say boyfriends, plural? What? Who? What? You're fourteen."

"Easy, Dad, use your words."

"Viv, you don't want me to use the words I have right now."

"Daddy, I'm fourteen," Viv's voice came smooth and confident.

Billy took a deep breath and started again. "Tell me about this boy," he said in his even tone.

"His name is Chris, and he is so sweet." Viv's voice was a dreamy teen coo.

"And why is Chris so sweet?" Billy pressed, accenting the word so.

"He's not like big gesture sweet; he's constantly sweet. You know? He does the little things like holding doors for people, and when we walk to class together, he carries my books."

"Huh, I thought carrying a girl's books died out in the '50s." He was almost speaking to himself, and I had to bite my cheek to stifle another laugh. "What does going out with Chris mean?"

"He asked if I'd go ice skating." Viv casually shrugged.

"Just the two of you?"

"No, a group is going, but we'd be a pair, you know?"

I remembered those dates. It was hardly dating and not intimate. Usually, a mass of early teens split into gender groups that would occasionally work up the nerve to talk to each other.

"What did your mom say?"

"She said I had to ask you."

"Mmhmm, I suspect your mom thinks I'll say no." There was a tone of jest in his voice. "When is this ice-skating date?"

"Friday, can I go?" There was a level of excitement in her voice.

"Yes, under one condition." Billy set his gaze on her. "I drive you and pick you up. And you take a cell phone in case you need me to pick you up early. And pepper spray... possibly a shotgun."

"Dad," Viv scolded. "Will you take Chris too?" The enthusiasm was bubbling over.

"Why do you think I want to drive? I want to meet this boy."

"Dad, don't be..." she paused for a moment before adding, "don't be uncool."

"Viv, I'm a rockstar. I couldn't be uncool if I wanted to be."

"Dad, no offense, but you're super uncool." Viv was teasing him now.

"What? How dare you!" Jest filled Billy's tone.

"Seriously, no cheesy jokes or embarrassing stories, promise?"

"I promise to be on my coolest behavior. Want me to bring a Grammy or something?"

"Dad," she chided. "By the way...."

"Mmhmm," Billy's murmur was absent.

"Checkmate."

I had to escape before the laugh burst from my mouth, and they caught me eavesdropping.