I haven't gotten off in what seemed to be forever.

I didn't know how long I had been in Hell, but it seemed to be sixty-five years and my dick was shriveling up like fingers after having been in the bath for a while. I couldn't bear to look at it because I feared that nothing would be the same down there. I wasn't even sure if I could feel my ball sack anymore because of how useless it had been.

I was joking.

Not about not having gotten off, that was for sure. Back home in No Man's Land, I had various ways of getting off and the thrill of being caught by the demon lord was what fueled me to do so, but now that I didn't have the proper channels or people for that matter, I was at a wit's end. I was not about to go sit in some shower and jack off like a prepubescent child. What the hell did I look like? I was also not about to do that because the demon lord could hear me in such loud proximity. 

It was different on Earth because he heard everyone but here in Hell, there were only so many humans compared to the demons, and he would be able to single me out. "Why am I thinking so hard about this?" I whined to myself, resisting the urge to rub my crotch against the bed like a horny dog. Even the word 'hard' made me want to throw myself off the nearest bridge. 

"You look so miserable, bro," I nearly jumped to the realm of Earth upon hearing Avery's annoying voice. "Shut up and get your Trix is for kids ass out of my face," I hissed in agitation, wanting someone to relieve me of this pent-up frustrations. I was trying to come up with ideas to help Maddox and this predicament with this king that I had never met, but it was so hard when I constantly thinking with my dick.

Hard.

Oh my god.

"Are you good, Troy?" Avery peered into my face as I sat on the edge of my bed, staring into nothingness. I didn't even know who I was anymore. All I could think about was the constant throb in my pants. "I don't know," I replied in such a glum tone and Avery rolled his eyes, snickering. "Ah, I see," He shook his head, his grey eyes chuckling in mirth. "You don't have your usual girls you can call here, huh?" He asked and I grumbled in pure agony. "Yea, but I wasn't even thinking about them."

I really was not thinking about the girls I used to get back with when I was on Earth. They were good for the time being because they were all I had access to, but now that I was here and on a totally different ballgame, they were nonexistent to me.

"Then what are you thinking about?" Avery teased as he sat down, ruffling my hair, and my mind automatically went left. Tall and tan taut muscles in the right places, silky smooth skin that framed a smile so wide, gold eyes glistened along with the glow of teeth, the way the black hair hung over those mysterious eyes as they looked away in a bout of shyness. "Dude, are you seriously good?" Avery snapped his hand in my face and I blinked, cheeks feeling hot. Nothing had to tell me what I was vividly visualizing because I already knew.

"Who knows?" I sighed, straightening up. It was hard to sit here and converse with my best friend like old times when Maddox was struggling with everything. He was carrying that burden all on his shoulders and all I could think about was literally fucking myself. No one but he and I knew about the situation, which made it harder because people knew that I wasn't okay. 

"Maddox told me about your interaction with my duplicate," Avery stammered out all of a sudden and I blinked back to the present. "Huh? Oh, yeah. What about that fucker?" I wouldn't admit to Avery or to anyone, but what he said really hurt my feelings. I mean, I knew that Jade and I were close because she was the rock of my life, but Avery was the sun on those dark days. Though he could be an idiot, that was my guy. 

"I want you to know that no matter what he said," Avery reached over to grab my hand and I stared, waiting for him to continue. "I would never say anything like that to you. You are my brother, man," His voice was pleading as if he was begging me to delete that memory from my mind. Though it was impossible because one couldn't forget anything like that, I could move on from it. "Do you understand?" He asked and I nodded, squeezing his hand. "Stop getting all mushy on me, you dickface." 

He chuckled and fell back on the bed. I tried to imagine a world where this didn't exist, and I completely hated it because that damn puppy lord wasn't in it. He made up 75% of my daily life here in Hell, and I couldn't imagine a life without seeing him now. It was crazy how I got scarily attached.

What, attached? Me? Never.

The badass Troy Victorino Morelli didn't get attached to people. People got attached to me. "Dude, why is your heart beating so loud? Breathe," Avery grumbled and I indeed realized that I wasn't breathing. I needed to get this heart injury checked out, pronto, or I was going to die. 

Avery gave me this knowing look as if he could read my mind and I looked away, pretending that I wasn't hiding some massive secret. Well, in all actuality, I had no clue what this secret was. 

"Isn't it crazy how we're starting to see the reality behind our world?" I nodded even though Avery knew nothing about how drastic that reality was. "Yea. I remember having to get on the bus when I was 14 in Wichita, surrounded by a bunch of dead bodies because I had no one else," It was such a morbid memory because, at that age, I was scared shitless. "I also remember how every rainy day, I would sit in my window and think of my parents and how I would never get to see them again," I chuckled, knowing that they were in the basement, having the time of their life.

"Do you think you would get married and have kids, you know, now that everything has changed?" Avery asked me. We did talk about this, the three of us, and how happy we would try to be if we were still in No Man's Land. 

I shook my head slowly, wondering why such a question would come up randomly. "I don't believe in love, so that's a no. I've told you this, bro." I rolled my eyes. I didn't know why I didn't. Maybe love screwed people over, so I wanted no parts of it. 

"But you don't even believe that anymore, do you?"

My eyes widened as I turned to look at him, seeing that he was staring at me with such a calculating look in his eyes and I felt like a cornered animal. It appeared that he was reading me and judging by everything, he was getting a good read. Either I was becoming too transparent or he knew me too well.

I couldn't answer that question.

"Troy, Sir Alistair would like to have a word with you," I turned my head to the sudden voice, seeing a random demon standing there with the glass over his pee eyes as my image was displayed in front of me. This brought on a bout of nostalgia because that was literally how everything started. I looked to Avery, who motioned for me to go on. "You know you want to go see him," He said in a playful tone but I could sense the hidden meaning and I wasn't sure how to feel about it.

"Okay. I'll come find you and Jade later," He nodded as he watched me walk away with the demon cop. "What's your name?" I said to the cop as we descended into the dark hallway. He blinked as if he didn't expect to answer him. "Oh, I'm Kylar," He whispered, pushing back silver hair to expose more of his tan face. He really needed to do something about those eyes. "Kylar, I think you're cool and all, but those eyes are just not for you," I patted his shoulder and he chuckled, nodding.

It was good to know we were on the same page because they all used to hate me when I got here. 

"Here we are," Kylar pointed towards the ward where Maddox stayed and I threw up a peace sign as I marched inside like I belonged there. "Your precious cargo has arrived, shitlord!" I screeched as the familiar red of his room greeted me. "In here," I heard that deep voice and I sauntered over to where he was standing, wondering what it was that he needed. "Oh," He turned around and my eyes bulged at the nappy mess that was his hair. He smiled softly as he pointed up. "Do you mind combing my hair for me?" He asked in a hopeful tone and I rolled my eyes, holding my hand out. 

Somehow, somewhere, I managed to stand in between his legs as he sat on the bed, black hair in my hand as I combed through it. I wanted to ask what the purpose of me doing this or why I was the one doing it, but I decided that I'd rather not. "What's your middle name, if you have one?" I asked Maddox and he snorted as I continued to comb through his soft hair. "Zavir," I raised my brow as the sound of soft music bounced off of his walls. "Even the legendary demon lord has a badass middle name."

The silence between us was nice because we could think about what we couldn't say out loud. The way unlit fire seem to ignite whenever we were around each other, or even how our eyes would stray to each other's without reason, or how my heart felt the incessant need to stop orf beat excessively whenever he did something so innocent as scrape my hand by accident. I could think about that without having to voice it.

"I don't care if it's the right time or not, but have you decided your game plan?" Though I said I would help him, he had to be the one to make the first steps so that he wouldn't regret the foundation he laid down. I could tell him to do step one and step two, but he would have to be willing to put all of his morals aside and I wanted him at his best, should anything happen. "Yes, I'm thinking that I just might not tell anyone and go to fight Tion myself," Maddox stated blatantly and my blood pressure shot through the roof.

"What the hell kind of plan is that, Maddox?" I let the comb fall to the floor as I stepped back to put my hand on my hips, watching him look at me incredulously. "What do you mean?" He questioned and the walls darkened with the sorrowful swirl of the dark night and I took a deep breath in to reel in my unraveling emotions. "God damn it. We talked about how you would tell your people the truth so that they could help you!" I watched as he stood up, hand to his forehead as he shook his head.

"I can't do that. I'm not going to do that," He said so calmly but I could see the cap on his cool getting ready to pop off, and I was going to be the reason for that. "And why the hell not, Maddox?!" I stepped closer to him, folding my arms as I stared at him bewilderedly. I understood that he harbored fear for his family, but taking on such a large burden and not confiding in them made everything worse. 

I couldn't quite grasp the reason why he would do something so inconsiderate. These people wanted to know why they were here and despite how bad their actions, they deserved to know so they could figure a plan to help their demon lord out of this sticky situation without anyone getting hurt. 

Maddox clenched his hands, fangs elongating over his lips as his eyes gradually darkened like the night outside his room. He took one firm look at me and began to unleash it. "Troy, is it so wrong of me to worry about you guys, make sure that you're safe?!" He yelled and I sighed, hearing the sentiment in his voice, but he wasn't getting where I was coming from. I stepped closer to him, narrowing my eyes so that he knew that I was serious this time.

"No!" I screeched, making sure to relay it to him time and time again. "But don't fucking do it alone! Remember that we are here for you, Maddox!" I told him this before. Why was he acting like it was something brand new? Didn't he know that we'd have his back regardless? He really didn't know how far his family's loyalty for him ran. He really thought we'd let him go out there, all by himself. "You can't be who you are without us!" That was the truth. We are what made him and therefore, we stand by his side. He wouldn't be the demon lord if these people didn't sin, and because they rely on him for everything, he should rely on them. 

Maddox said nothing as his mouth fell open to empty silence. His eyes widened drastically as his eyes softened upon my appearance. I clicked my teeth as I watched his hands unclench and unravel with a defeated expression on his face. He looked like a kicked puppy, but at least he knew he wasn't in this alone. 

I chuckled lowly as silence drifted over us, providing the conclusion that we needed for this dreadful night. "...you really are no good."

My heart started to beat lowly as my stomach started to flutter, watching him take a seat on the bed. One of his shaky hands reached up to grasp mine and I couldn't stop the goofy grin that traced my lips. "As long as you are good, I'm okay," Maddox responded lowly, his eyes returning to their normal color. At least he knew now who the boss was.

He started to rub my hand, which made heat travel my body and an unconscious blush come to my cheeks. What was happening to me? He wasn't even looking at me and I felt like I was naked and put on display for his very own eyes. All of a sudden, it hit me. 

"How come you haven't killed me yet, Maddox?"

When he arrived on Earth, his true purpose was to capture me so that he could kill me. I came to that conclusion after Natanya came running to him. I also realized that he had to have been coming to kill me because I was the first person out of all of the offenders that he came to Earth for. But here I was, standing before him with my hand in his as if we had been doing this for a very long time.

Maddox sighed and fixed me with a look that said things that I couldn't put my finger. He clicked his teeth, playing with my fingers. "I don't think I ever had the intention of eliminating you," I blinked stupidly. "That just became more apparent when I realized how big a heart you had for people, especially people you once had the notion of hating. When I saw how caring and how free-spirited you were, I realized that I never would kill you."

I didn't think he realized how much sleeptalking he was doing without even actually being asleep. I didn't think he realized how much it was doing to me, to my heart, to my raging libido. I didn't think he realized how my heart was beating so fast at the sound of his soft voice talking about me in such a way, or how my hand was sweating because of this close proximity. Either way, something was bound to give in.

"Don't say shit like that, Maddox," I swallowed as I breathed heavily. I was so going to regret not having a filter, but I could always kill myself afterward. "It just makes me want to kiss you." At the same time that his mischevious eyes slowly leaned up to look into mine, I was swallowing tightly as my eyes widened, registering every single word I just said. Everything was going straight to hell now. I regretted ever being born. The second that I moved to snatch my hand away, Maddox chuckled darkly as he yanked me down to him, a downright sexy smirk on his lips as black eyes gleamed into my soul.

"So do it."