| D A R R E N

"R-Right now?" Josh stuttered, blushing as he ducked his face from view. His blue eyes flicked around us nervously. I smirked because he was being adorable as hell. Of course, if he really didn't want to I wasn't going to force him. I wanted my pup to come to me willingly. More than that I wanted him to be comfortable enough to initiate it on his own. If he wasn't ready then we'd take baby steps.

"Yes, now," I bit my lip so I wouldn't outright laugh at his expression. It was clear that he was torn between giving in and being the defiant little shit that he is. I'm interested in seeing which side will win. Josh has a penchant for blatantly ignoring me when I've asked him to do something. You'd think as my beta he'd follow my orders but no, he just likes to test his luck. Not that I expect him to be a mindless puppet. When he was my beta, rather than brashly brushing off whatever I said, it was expected that if he disagreed with what I asked he'd tell me and not just dive headfirst into whatever he thought was the better option. Our dynamic was a little different now though, he isn't my beta, he's my mate, my lunos. Communication is more important now than ever.

Josh turned a darker shade of red as his gaze shifted to his feet. He was practically squirming under my gaze. Is this really that unsettling for him? I hope not considering I plan on asking it of him a lot more in the future.

"Come on, pup, you can do it," I teased. He growled lowly at the challenge but still refused to look me in the eye. Josh moved forward hesitantly, stopping once our chests were close enough to touch. Tilting his head back, he brought our lips together in a shy kiss. I had to lock my muscles in place order not to deepen it, because, fuck, he tasted delicious. Josh whimpered but pulled away quickly when I growled back in response.

I didn't pull him back like I wanted to. I knew that I was pushing him by asking him to kiss me in a public space - even though no one else is in the living room right now. So I let him retreat and watched as he quivered with the need to continue what he started.

"Good pup," I praised. Josh buried his face in his hands. The tips of his ears are red from how hard he's blushing. I smirked, unable to help it. He's literally too cute, it makes me want to mess with him.

"You're no fair!" Josh groaned. I laughed at how whiny he sounded.

"How?" I asked smiling.

"Ugh! Because you could literally ask me to jump off a cliff and I would. " Josh lowered his hands a little, looking at the ground. "You don't know how much control you have over me," he finished softly. Raising an eyebrow, I gripped his chin and tilted his face up. He doesn't know just how wrong he is.

"No, pup, you don't know how much control you have over me," I whispered to him gently, leaning in slowly so he could pull away if wanted. Thank goddess he didn't. I kissed him slowly and deeply, careful not to go too far. Josh had one hand clenched into my shirt and the other pressing against my chest like he was torn between pushing me away and pulling me closer. So I pulled away for him despite the overwhelming desire to go further. His lips were pink and kiss swollen, looking too tempting for words. "Fuck," I growled "Say it, say you're mine,"

"I'm yours,  daddy," Josh replied softly, pressing his face into the crook of my neck. I turned to mush. "Are you mine?" he asked unsurely, lips brushing against my skin where he was hiding. I shivered, wrapping my arms around his waist and pulling him on to my lap.

"I'm all yours," We sat like that for a moment, just enjoying each other's embrace before he leaned back, avoiding my gaze. I tried not to think about how he looked perched on top of me, his ass sitting right above my dick, or the blush turning his face and neck red. For some reason, Josh thought my control was boundless but I guarantee that it can only stretch so far. "What is it, baby?" I asked brushing my thumb across his warm cheek.

"We should... um talk about l-last night," Josh stuttered, looking at my nose rather than my eyes. I raised an eyebrow. There was definitely a lot to talk about, starting with the fight he got into with Nick yesterday.

"Which part? Your fight or what happened after?" Josh pushed my shoulder in response to my teasing tone.

"All of it, maybe?" he asked more than stated, "I get why you were upset and all... but why...the spanking?" I couldn't help myself, I gripped his ass pressing him down onto my dick. Josh gasped as his hands flew to my shoulders, moaning softly.

"Didn't we go over this already?" I asked. "Watching your ass turn red as you moan and squirm on my lap is hot as fuck for one. Secondly, naughty pups need to be disciplined," I growled causing Josh to tremble against me with a soft whimper. "Wanna talk about how you tried to suck my soul out of my body?"

"I just- I don't know what came over me... have you seen your dick?" He babbled randomly "It's so thick and veiny and long and, fuck, I wanted it in my throat. So bad. I wanted to know how you tasted, wanted you to use me." Josh turned a concerning shade of red. "You've turned me into your little cockslut, daddy," he admitted, peeking at me through his lashes.

I can count on one hand the number of times I have lost control. In none of those instances had I lost control over my wolf. We've always been on one accord. Needless to say, I wasn't prepared when the lupine part of me forced his way to the forefront with the sole intention of fucking and claiming my mate. My fangs dropped and I was literally holding my wolf back by a thread. The Alpha in me controlled my movements, grinding Josh along our hardened shaft mercilessly. Josh moaned unsurely and that thread almost snapped.

I slammed our lips together, dominating his mouth as Josh tried to keep up. I could tell this was getting to be a little much for him but it was so damn hard to stop. Josh pulled away, pushing my shoulders back, gasping when he saw my eyes glowing gold.

"D-Darren w-wait," He panted, eyes widening when I leaned back in any way, "Pl-please," I froze at the tremor in his voice. His beautiful blue eyes were watery. I clenched my jaw as my arms crushed Josh to my chest, I buried my face in his neck. Still, my wolf fought me, filling my mind with images of Josh naked writhing under us in pleasure as we- shit.

"I'm sorry, baby, give a minute," I gritted out "Just stay still," Josh didn't move, he stiffened in my arms but was unable to stop the tremors rolling through his body.

"Please Darren," Josh whimpered "I-I c-can't...I-" I've never felt more like shit than right now. I was supposed to protect him, not hurt him. But I couldn't let him go. A deep primal need had arisen and the only way it could be sated was by Josh's ass gliding up and down my dick.

"I'm going to let you go, pup," I told him and the lupine part of myself, "Do not run," I'd chase him and when I caught him I'd fuck him. I knew it and so did Josh. "move very slowly," I warned unlatching my death grip around him and Josh began to pull away slowly. His eyes never leaving me, like if he looked away for one second I'd attack. Once he was off my lap I shot up making for the door but Josh caught my wrist before I could get too far.

"Darren..." He tried but, I knew I couldn't stay or I'd fuck him. Right here. Right now. My wolf was already planting the thoughts into my brain. In excruciating detail. All the possibilities. Bend him over the back of the couch, driving into him until he lost his voice and his legs were shaking. Til his hole was overflowing with my seed and making a mess on his thighs. I swallowed.

"Baby, I don't want to hurt you, let go," My voice was deep and inhuman even my own ears. Josh's grip loosened. I didn't look back as I walked towards the front door. If I so much as glanced over my shoulder the little control I'd mustered up would crumble away.

I marched outside, eyes glowing as my claws dug into the skin on my palm. I leaned against a tree breathing heavily, trying to keep myself from walking back in the house and taking Josh on every single fucking surface. Thankfully, I was pulled from my thoughts by the sound of approaching footsteps. I didn't need to look to know who they belonged to.

"What's wrong?" Zev asked. He didn't push when I didn't answer "You look like you need a run," I grit my teeth, because yeah I did need a run, but if I shifted there was a possibility that my wolf would push his way forward again.

"Make sure I don't go back to the packhouse, no matter what," I told Zev gruffly before shifting and taking off. It didn't take long for Zev to catch up as a tiger. He green eyes peered at me curiously. We ran the border ten times over and then ten times more before I was calm enough to slow down and shift back. We'd been out running so long the sun had started to go down.

"Ready to answer the question, now?" He asked again, eyeing me with mild curiosity.

"Nothing's wrong," I replied, rolling my shoulders, "It's just getting harder to reign in my desire for Josh, it's driving my wolf crazy, "I sighed running a hand down my face. Zev nodded sympathetically.

"Pun intended?" he asked raising an eyebrow. I scoffed in amusement.

"Pun definitely intended," I grinned.

"Go to your mate and talk to him about it," Zev advised, "Am I done babysitting you so I can go see mine?" His hazel eyes reflected just how much he'd rather be around his little mate. I had to laugh because this was probably the closest I'd ever get to seeing Zev pout.

"Thanks for that, you're the only one here who had a hope in hell of stopping me." Zev dipped his head in acknowledgment.

"In truth, you're the only one who'd be able to fight me without dying instantly, it may even be possible that you'd get a few hits in," He smirked. I'm probably the last person who'd ever want to fight this behemoth. I've seen him in action and can say with complete honesty, he's the harbinger of death. Maybe it's because he's fucking massive, or that despite his size he's fucking fast and lethal, maybe it's a combination. Either way, courting death isn't a desire of mine.

"Ha! If I'm ever suicidal maybe I'll test that theory," I snorted "Let's get you back to Kaleb before he cusses me out for keeping you out all night again," The tiger had the nerve to smile as he remembered the incident. Let's just say I didn't appreciate being pelted by pillows, or that Josh was laughing his ass off while throwing the pillows too.

"Are you scared of my little mate?" Zev smirked, not even trying to hide his amusement.

"No, he just said some very hurtful things that I think were completely uncalled for. Especially since it was your fault we were late," I grumbled back. I learned that when it comes to Zev, Kaleb can be really mean. I'll never understand how someone so tiny could generate so much anger.

"Thank you for not ratting me out," The tiger said, barely holding his amusement in check. I rolled my eyes, after the cussing out I got his thanks doesn't mean shit. I should have told Kaleb who was the real reason behind our tardiness so the little chihuahua could tear his mate a new one instead. But no, I'm the ever-gracious Darren. Of course, I apologized to the angry 5'0" omega like I'd been chastised by my own mother. He forgave me after I promised to make sure it didn't happen again.

"Oh you are so not welcome, I'm holding that over your head indefinitely, tiger," I said back. Zev threw his head back in a boisterous laugh. Most if not all the pack fears Zev, but they are also awed by him. No one has had the balls to walk up to the man and strike up a conversation and I think Zev liked it that way. He rarely laughs or smiles when he not around his little omega, but beneath all that muscle and intense glower is a decent man. Kaleb sees it and so can I.

"I didn't know getting called an assbutt would cause you to hold a grudge," He smiled. I huffed and Zev almost burst into laughter all over again. I take it back, there's nothing decent about this man at all.

"Yea, yea, we'll see who's laughing when I snitch on your ass," I smirked. Zev glared but his hazel eyes still glowed with mirth.

"Seems you're suicidal after all," He intoned, humor lacing his voice. Before I could respond, Josh's frantic voice filled my head.

Darren! Is Zev with you? Josh asked frantically, I could hear the worry and anxiety in his voice. Immediately, I thought the worst had happened and somehow Kaleb was missing again. The last thing we need right now is a rampaging tiger.

Yeah, what's wrong? I frowned and Zev, watching my expressions change did so as well. He muscles bunched as he clenched his fists.

It's Kaleb, he's gone into heat, tell that overgrown house kitten to haul ass! Came my mate's semi-relieved reply. That was the exact opposite of what I thought he was going to say. I almost broke out laughing, almost. Simply because Zev was staring at me like he was ready to take on a whole army by himself if that was the news I'd gotten and partly because Josh called Zev a kitten and I honestly just can't. Zev's eyes started glowing so I started talking before he decided to go off and murder people because I was taking too long.

"Josh said Kaleb just went into hea-" I didn't get the words out before the big bastard shifted and took off towards the packhouse. Well, fuck. I'm glad it's late at night so no one will be out to get in the way of the determined tiger. I shifted and tried my damnedest to keep up but it was tough, even for me. Once the house came into view Zev shifted all the while moving forward with what seemed like tunnel vision. He darted into the house, running past Josh who had a pair of shorts in his hands before disappearing up the stairs.

"I'm so glad all the children are asleep right now," My mate shook his head still looking at the steps. As shifters, nudity doesn't faze us but we don't just walk around naked. As such I was glad that no children were scarred for life tonight.

"I'll have to agree with you on that," I sighed.

"He's going to break Kaleb in half," Josh blurted out of nowhere.

"Can't argue with you on that either," I took Josh's hand, leading him to our room. It was like we were stuck in a strange silence. The air was heavy with words that wanted to be spoken but neither of us let them out.

Josh followed behind me, nibbling his lip, avoiding my gaze every time I glanced over my shoulder at him. His brows were furrowed like he was concentrating on something but I didn't see any discomfort there. I was glad that he was okay with me touching in. Being away from him even for a minute left me starved for his presence. I want to hold him in my arms but after what happened earlier I'm not sure he'd want that.

When we got to the room Josh pulled away, his hand slipping from mine as he walked deeper into the room. I sighed softly and closed the door behind me.

"Josh-" I started to tell him how sorry I was about almost losing control. Josh turned to look at me over his shoulder, anxiety shining in his eyes. Before I could say anything more he cut me off.

"I-um...shower," He stumbled over his words nervously, "Wanna join?" I smiled softly as his eyes darted away from mine.

"Yeah." I would never say no to the sight of water rolling down my mate's delicious body. Ever. Josh gave a shy smile in response before walking into the bathroom with me following behind. After stripping we stepped into the shower and fell into our usual routine. He didn't shy from my touches as I washed his body but I made sure not to linger too long. I was determined to behave and win back my mate's trust if I'd lost it.

Josh was silent the whole time, his eyes trained on the floor and full of guilt. I washed his hair as he lathered my chest with soap. Still, we said nothing even though I wanted nothing more than to prod his brain. I need to know how to make what I did earlier better. I have to fix it so we aren't in a constant state of silence like this. I'm so used to Josh running his mouth that him not talking was more concerning than anything.

We finished up, but unlike usual, Josh dried himself and dressed, leaving before me. Does he really not want me close to him right now? Is he forcing himself to endure my touches just so I don't feel bad? I honestly rather he yell at me or punch me in the face. It would hurt less. I don't want him to think that appeasing me came before his happiness. Like he was just a doll to be played with when I wanted and nothing more.

Never that.

I don't see Josh as a sexual object. I'm not Jared. Though I'm probably not much better than that pile of possum shit. I should have been there for Josh when he needed me. It's my fault that he was kidnapped. If I hadn't been blinded by irritation from his distant behavior I would have been on that run with him and Jared never would have touched a hair on his head. I finished dressing but stood there for a moment. I should have been the Alpha my dad taught me to be. I need to be better. If I can't protect my own mate how the hell am I going to protect a whole pack? Sighing, I ran a hand down my face before finally leaving.

Josh was already on the bed, huddled under the covers. I climbed in next to him, careful not to touch him unless he moved closer on his own accord. He frowned a little as he watched me. His blue eyes filled with a myriad of emotions. None of which I could decipher.

"Is it okay if I touch you, pup?" I rasped softly. Josh nodded causing my heart to flutter happily. I cupped his cheek, rubbing my thumb over the flushed skin. After a moment he moved closer, resting his head on my chest. I ran my fingers through his hair, messaging his scalp. It was calming for both of us. "We need to talk, baby."

"About earlier? Yeah, we do..." Josh picked his head up from my chest to look at me, the reluctance in his voice was audible. I nodded. "I'm sorry that I overreacted," He apologized like he was the one at fault.

"No, you didn't," I frowned at him. If anyone's at fault it's me. "You weren't comfortable and you made it known, I'm also sorry for putting you in that position and not being able to protect you," I murmured and Josh looked at me like I'd grown an extra head.

"Protect me?" He prompted, eyebrows raised.

"From Jared, from me," I said and Josh shot up, glaring down at me with teary eyes. His shoulders were stiff and he looked like he was going to burst into tears. My heart felt like it had been put into a shredder.

"Don't you dare ever fucking compare yourself to that piece of shit!" his growled through a clenched jaw. I sat up, reaching to brush his tears away but he caught my hand glaring at me. It felt like a punch to the gut. This is the second time today I've made Josh cry. I should never be anything but the cause of happy tears. My mom instilled in me the importance of treasuring my mate and that's what I fully intend to do.

"I shouldn't have pushed you that far," I said regretfully. I should have controlled myself, no matter how tempted I was.

"You didn't. Darren when will you realize that you're not the fucking problem! I am!" He yelled, pleading with me to understand, to agree. I disagree wholeheartedly, my baby could never be a problem when, for me, he was the answer. My whole existence is one incomplete statement and he fills in all the blanks. I'm literally in love with everything about him.

"Baby, you are not-"

"I am, I am," Tears ran down his face as he cut me off. I've never seen Josh so...shattered. Like he'd given up trying to pick up all his scattered pieces. "I am. I don't deserve you, I'm messed up and flawed. I'm broken and half the time I feel less than worthless. The only person who's ever seen past all of my fucked-up-ness is you. Since the day we met, you've been saving me Darren and you still are, but has it ever crossed your mind that I can't be?" He ranted brokenly. "My parents abandoned me for a reason, I'm not good enough to keep around. Yet you're still here. Why? Why?" His expression was desperate like he was trying to convince me to give up on him too.

I frowned.

"There is no way I could possibly put into words what you mean to me, Josh. I don't know what you want me to say. One moment you're letting me love you the next you're telling me I shouldn't." I shook my head, chuckling softly "As if anything you say or do could ever change the way I feel about you. I'm not going anywhere and neither are you. Maybe I haven't made it clear. You. Are. Mine. All of you," I picked him up, transferring him onto my lap. Josh allowed me to, almost docile in the way he melted into my arms. He looked at me in awe, like someone who's seeing the sun for the first time. "That includes every single insecurity," I brought his hand to my mouth, kissing his fingers. "I know you're strong, I know you can take care of yourself, but there's something I need you to for me."

"W-What?" Josh asked timidly, his voice reluctant.

"I need you to love yourself too," Josh immediately shook his head, looking like that was the last thing on earth that he wanted to do. You will never understand how much that broke my heart. "It's not going to happen overnight, baby, I know. I just want you to know that no one is perfect. We're all flawed. Your flaws are a part of why I love you. These words don't hold a candle to how I really feel but, I love you, I love you. Josh, I'm in love with you, all of you." Tears fell down his rosy cheeks, but he never looked away from my gaze. "Do you love me?" I asked softly.

"Wha- I-?" He made the cutest expression in response, a mix of confusion and yes, duh!

"Do you love me?" I asked again.

"Yes," Josh said softly, but firmly.

"Do you trust me?" Josh bit his lip and nodded.

"Yes."

"Then trust me when I say you are worth saving," I pressed our foreheads together. "Earlier, I should have restrained myself, it was clear that you weren't okay with going that far in a public space. I'm sorry, I-" Josh chuckled with a soft smile, sniffling as more tears spilled over onto his cheeks.

"I didn't stop you because I'm scared of you Darren. The last person I need protection from is you," he admitted softly "I just couldn't let you d-dirty yourself anymore..." I bit back a growl as I leaned forward, capturing his lips with mine.

Dirty myself? I guess I'll just have to clean you up. I slipped my tongue into his mouth leaving no part of it unclaimed. Making a point to show him that I desired him, loved him, cherished him. Josh trembled, moaning weakly as he simply sat there letting me have my way. He submitted. I pulled back a little. "All clean," I murmured, against his lips, staring him in the eye. His blue orbs widened more tears falling. He looked down suddenly before meeting my gaze again with determination glittering in his eyes.

"D-Darren I want-" Josh took a breath," I want you to mark me please," He gazed at me earnestly. To say I was shocked would be an understatement. My heart pounded in my chest as my wolf howled in delight. He wants my mark. "I k-know that I'm messed up but I promise I'll be the best mate for you! So, please-"

"Josh," I cut him off "You're already perfect for me," I kissed him again, slowly, savoring everything about the man in front of me. He responded by molding himself to me, his arms wrapping around my neck. I rubbed his back gently, nipping at his swollen lips as I pulled back. "I'll give you one chance to back out..."

"Please," Josh sighed breathlessly, "Please..."

"We're going to mark each other at the same time," I said and Josh looked at me reluctantly. "I want your mark baby, give it to me."

I slid my lips along the side of his throat, feeling his racing pulse against my skin. His soft breaths filled my ears as my mouth settled over the place where his neck and shoulder met. His scent was the strongest here, filling my nose with the smell of pinecones and mahogany. I waited with my head tilted a little so that Josh could find the spot for his mark. After a moment he moved, trailing his nose along the column of my throat, stopping just below the juncture of my neck and shoulder. He stayed there and I knew he'd found his place.

I kissed, licked and sucked the skin under my lips till it was red from the attention. Josh moaned, shifting his hips a bit but he otherwise stayed in place. I felt my fangs drop and I opened my mouth placing my teeth on his skin. My mate trembled in my hold, following my lead. Instinct took over as I bit him, claiming him as mine permanently. My wolf howled in triumph while my heart swelled.

Josh moaned hotly in my ear, his hips moving faster, almost like he couldn't control himself. Then I felt his teeth sink into my skin. My vision flashed white as my whole being was lit on fire in the best way possible. I've never felt the urge to kiss, fuck and make love to someone at the same time before. Moaning, I thrust up into him causing our hardened shafts to rub against each other through our shorts. We were locked together as our souls intertwined even tighter than they were before.

I could feel all of him, the happiness, the sadness, the hate, his anger, all of it. I took it all into my being just as I gave him everything that was me. I sensed when he accepted, it was a strange feeling. I felt exposed and vulnerable but at the same time, I have never felt stronger.

Josh's soft mewls of pleasure pulled me back from the recesses of my consciousness, giving me the wherewithal to pull my teeth from his neck. My pup cried out as he pulled away from me. Tears streamed down his face but I knew they weren't from sadness, I could feel his whole being radiating with happiness as well as pleasure. I cleaned my mark and Josh mewled.

I leaned back to look up at his beautiful face as he undulated on top of me.

"Cum with me, pup," I growled as I felt myself nearing the edge. Groaning, I watched as Josh came, his whole body stilling as waves of trembles wracked through his body. His eyes rolled back as a low moan rolled past his lips. The sight was enough. I came with a grunt as Josh sagged against me trembling.

"D-Darren, Darren...Darren," He moaned softly, as he cleaned the mark he'd given me weakly. "I love y-you," I smiled, happier than I have ever been.

"I love you too, Josh, I love you too."

|| AUTHOR'S NOTE

Alright my loves, thanks so much for reading. Please leave you thoughts on the chapter in the comments. I appreciate you all so much.

Love ya,

-J.T.