She hadn't laughed so freely in a long time. Josh had the best friends, starting with Emma. Shaun felt a connection to her. She had years of mutual friendship and distance with Holly. Courtney had offered convenience and proximity as they filled each other's lunch hour and social calendar. With Emma, she shared more than motherhood and shared a special friend.

Ashton smiled. "You pass."

"How can we scare the other one away?" Rex winked.

Emma scolded, "Boys stop. Shaun and Josh are just friends. She lives in Seattle."

"We went to Seattle. Remember the flying fish?" Rex told a story about travel mishaps.

Shaun laughed. At some point, Josh returned with her wine and a sour face. He and Oliver had a deep conversation before Josh went to talk to his mother. She observed the mother and son out of the corner of her eye. Josh always talked about his parents' careers, which led Shaun to wonder how close of a family they were. Seeing him smile at something his mother said filled in some blanks. His father approached and slapped him on the back before resting his hand on his wife's shoulder. Shaun turned away as memories of her father surfaced.

"... and the second time, he found her face down on the floor. Her knees were a mess, but not for a good reason."

Oliver scolded the storyteller. "Don't be crude."

"Nothing's crude about it, whip cream boy."

Oliver's face turned red, and JJ took over teasing his brother. Their table was drawing attention as they laughed. Shaun wiped her eyes and jumped when she felt someone behind her.

"Having fun?"

She nodded. "Does she fall all the time?"

Josh chuckled. "Yes, but not like when they first met again."

"Are you alright? You looked upset coming back from the bar."

He shook his head. "Just business."

She put her hand on his arm. "Are you sure?" He stared at her hand, so she quickly withdrew it. She cleared her throat. "The salad is coming."

Shaun picked at her salad, but she didn't feel hungry. During the laughter, she started comparing an evening with Josh and his friends to an evening with Eliot. Everything felt tense with Eliot. Shaun may be shy, but she knew not to control a conversation. A pleasant conversation had an ebb and flow to it. Rex may need a lesson, but he entertained others. Eliot only wanted attention and money from his companions. Josh didn't embarrass her, and he even let go of whatever upset him about his business.

He whispered, "You aren't eating."

She took a bite of romaine lettuce to prove him wrong. When the filet of sole arrived, it looked gray, and any appetite, she had disappeared. Rex announced it looked like paste and joked about it gumming up his insides.

"Death by sole."

Josh offered her some of his steak, but she shook him off, resulting in him frowning. She imagined him reporting back to Stella.

Their table quieted down while they ate and sat through some boring speeches. When the dancing started, Josh held out his hand. "Do you want to?"

She did. She wanted to be held and feel safe for the length of a song. His scent was familiar to her. Years later, it would recall security and friendship. The time spent with Josh always made her feel as if everything would be alright in the end.

After her dance with Josh, Rex asked Shaun to dance. He was a wonderful dancer. "I usually let Ashton lead."

Shaun said, "I can lead."

His laughter turned heads and her face red. "Sweetheart, I'm still a gentleman."

"Your mouth might argue."

"Ouch! I like you so much better than the cat allergy."

"Who?"

"Your Josh's lady friend."

"Who? Ann?"

"Don't fret. She won't be around for long. She lacks Emma's seal of approval." Shaun looked away. "Don't worry, she likes you."

She shook her head. "We're just friends."

"I know, Red."

Shaun laughed. Rex could steal Eliot's name for her. Eliot would hate Rex.

Squeezed into the car again, Josh put his arm around her shoulder. Leaning in, he whispered. "This is more comfortable."

She leaned into him as Oliver talked about golfing. "Did JJ ask you?"

"Yes, but I ride on Sundays."

Shaun said, "You can ride any day. Golf, if you want to."

"I don't know..."

"He suckered me, because Emma and Daphne have plans."

"Okay. I'll play." Shaun felt slightly disappointed, but she couldn't monopolize all his Sundays. "I'll leave work early on Tuesday and drive to Dover."

"Perfect." She relaxed.

The car grew quiet, and Shaun felt sleepy from the lull of the engine. She woke up with a start. She and Josh were alone in the backseat. Her head rested on his shoulder. She looked up at him to apologize.

Without warning, Josh cupped her chin. She shut her eyes as his thumb caressed her cheek. Her insides melted as she anticipated his mouth on her.

"Sorry."

She opened her eyes to see him turn away. He didn't like her like that. She was a fool, like the girl with the crush.

His voice sounded loud in the dark car. "You still haven't told me your middle name."

Without warning, he tickled her side, causing her to squirm away from him. Proper distance seemed appropriate.

"Tell me. Tell me."

"Fine. They named me after my Grandmother Sinclair. Irene Sinclair."

"Shaun Irene McManus. S.I.M. Sim. What's wrong with that?"

"It's old. But better than J.A.R. Jar."

"Hey, I like my initials." He reached out to tickle her, but her distance made it a stretch. "Are you okay if I don't come tomorrow?"

"Of course. It's not an obligation and you have an open invitation, except for Monday because it's therapy day."

"With Denny?"

"And others. The paddock is busy and the horses get plenty of exercise."

"He likes you."

Shaun sighed. "We've had this conversation before. I don't like him like that."

In the past, she added she was married, but Josh knew the truth. He had met Eliot and seen him with Courtney. They were a couple. Shaun wanted her divorce final, before Courtney woke up and saw Eliot for what he was. It took Shaun years. Once again, she wished Eliot was more like Josh. He was caring and upstanding. Except it seemed as if he almost kissed her. She shivered as confusion coursed through her.

"Cold."

"I'm fine."

The last thing she needed was his masculine scented tux jacket. Josh reached forward and fiddled with the control to turn up the temperature setting.

"You're almost home."

Five minutes later, the car stopped in front of her house. Josh walked her to the door, but he stayed a few steps behind her. She opened the door and turned back to wish him goodnight. He waved.

"Thanks for being my fake date."

Her smile was thin as she turned away and disappeared inside the door. Once she shut the door, she pressed her back to it and let out a long sigh. Something had changed. Their friendship felt strained. Probably because she threw herself at him. Bad wife. Bad friend. She felt mortified.

In the morning, she'd make the arrangements. She had to do it on her own. It was time to stop letting Eliot dictate her life.