"So.... you guys are dating?" Claude asked.

"....yEs," Zelda squealed. "I guEss?"

"Girl share."

"The fuck- hell no."

"Not even a lil' smooch-"

"Robin you too?"

"I WANT AFFECTION, WOMAN!"

"I HUG YOU ALL THE TIME, THOUGH."

"A MANS AFFECTION, ZELLIE BELLIE, I NEED TO FEED MY GAY AGENDA."

"LIKE I SAID, JUST FUCK CLAUDE-"

"Y'all shut up they posted some shit about the field trip," Claude said, throwing pillows to both of them.

"Claude why are you even here?" Zelda asked.

"Um, celebratory sleepover, duh," Claude said with a hint of sass.

"Anyway... field trip?" Robin asked.

"Remember that paper I made you guys sign like a month ago with no further context aside from it being very important?" Claude said.

"...yes?" Robin and Zelda said simultaneously, both showing immediate regret.

"Yeah well turns out that paper was a field trip form. We're gonna go on a field trip around the Mario... uh... universe I guess?"

"By that you mean?" Zelda asked.

"By that I mean," Claude started, "um, well, we'll be going to different kingdoms like the Cascade Kingdom, the Sand Kingdom, and so on."

"Claude..."

"Oh don't worry, I got Ike and Sheik on it too so the whole squad is going! Isn't that great guys?" Claude smiled awkwardly as Robin and Zelda gave him a death glare.

"You really put Ike and Sheik together after Ike and I started dating?" Zelda sneered.

"You're not mad about the trip-"

"I don't care as long as we get to skip school," Robin said as he put his arms behind his head. Zelda nodded in agreement.

"Oh. Well, to be fair, I didn't know you guys would start dating," Claude said. That was a half lie. He knew full well those two would start dating at some point, just not right before the trip. "I should mention that we'll be going to the Seaside Kingdom so... pack yer trousers, lads!"

"I don't like the beach," Robin whined.

"What a grampa," Zelda muttered.

"I gotta call my mama and tell her to mail me some trunks," Claude said.

"Why not just buy some?" Zelda asked.

"Why spend money when you can get it for free?" Claude smiled slyly. "Now shut up I'm calling my ma."

Zelda fake a moan and Robin started throwing pillows at Claude. He cursed and glared at them.

"KHALID!"

"Fuck!" Claude whispered, nearly dropping his phone. It was on speaker. He looked at the other two, who had shocked looks on their faces.

"MY SON! Is that you?!"

"...yes mom."

"What is it you need, boy?"

"Mom could you stop shouting please?"

"Don't tell me what to do unless you want me to smack that mouth of yours."

"I'm sorry. Uh, I was just wondering if you could mail me those swimming trunks I bought before I left for the academy."

"The green ones?"

"...yes."

"I don't know, Khalid, those are kinda ugly. They make you look like you have a fridge body."

"Mother please."

"All right, all right, I'll send them. Take care honey, love you."

"Love ya too mom."

He hung up and immediately raised a finger at Robin and Zelda, who were covering their mouths in awe.

"Do NOT say a word to anyone!" Claude screamed.

"Your real name is Khalid," Robin breathed.

"That's so cool," Zelda gasped. "Why were we not aware of this information?"

"Because it's easier to have everyone call me a fake name than making fun of me for my real name," Claude sighed, a gloomy looks coming over his eyes.

"They just jealous they don't have such a badass name," Zelda said.

"You have a beautiful name, Khalid," Robin grinned.

Khalid smiled. "All right, you guys can call me Khalid, in private! Aka when it's only us three."

"It's a deal!"