Rating: G
Ships: KITTIES!
Warning: Hateful words and kittens
Stars: doesn't matter.
Inspired by: Picture :D
-----------------------

"P-please..." Bill whimpered. "I need this." Tears sprung from his eyes. "I need them."

Dipper shook Bill off his leg and walked to the exit. "You know what these things are, Bill. Save your pride and get off."

Bill dragged himself along the living room carpet, getting closer to Dipper as a litter of six multi coloured kittens followed him. "That's what I'm trying to do! See?" He lifted a purple kitten, who looked unhappy and glared at the crying man who held her.

"You can't keep them." Dipper said, trying to keep his frown. The green kitten pawed at Bill sadly, wanting to be held. He cocked an eyebrow. "Where's sloth?"

Bill sniffled, sitting cross legged and gathering all the kittens in his hand, counting them. He looked behind, and on the couch on a sleeping Grunkle Stan's lap was the dark blue kitty, purring happily. He looked to Dipper and sniffled. "Being adorable."

Dipper sighed and held his head. The red kitten started wraring and hissing, scratching Bill's arm until he let go. The cats started playing around while Dipper thought about it. The pink one brushed against his legs. The kitten sneezed and Bill's face turned hopeful. His face turned sinister and he smirked. He got up and leaned on pine tree with half lidded eyes. "She sneezes like you, pine tree."

The pink cat jumped to Dipper's chest and he caught her. The cat mewed and snuggled him. Dipper smiled and sighed. "Okay, we'll keep them babe." Dipper's eyes widened as he realized what came out of his mouth and dropped the feline. "I swear to god it was the cat." He pushed a smirking Bill off of him. "We are not keeping them, not anymore." He brushed his hands off on his flannel shirt in disgust. He seen Bill holding the green kitten.

He sighed angrily. Bill smirked. "Sure, just the cat." He smirked at Dipper's glare towards the green cat. "Aren't you looking green with envy?"

"Just drop the cat, we're killing all of them." He growled. Bill snickered, noticing Wrath walking around, growling and hissing at Greed.

"Make me. These are my babies pine tree, I'm not giving them up so easily." Bill knew what was going on. He was glad shooting star was at Candy's and sloth was happy in Stan's lap. Or they could disturb someone with the argument and torture that was about to take place.

Dipper growled and kicked Bill in the side, ripping the cat out of his hands. The cat mewed as Dipper dropped him on the floor. "You're not keeping him, or any of them." He growled.

Bill smiled. "I am, and you'll be much too busy to stop me."

Dipper growled and smirked. "What makes you think that?" Wrath growled and pawed angrily at Gluttony, who meowed as he brushed against and chewed at Dipper's feet. "Ugh! Fine! These things are driving me crazy!" He stomped into the kitchen, Gluttony, Greed, Pride and Wrath followed, tangling and almost tripping their new owner.

Bill pet envy and lust cheerfully. He smiled. "Sorry about pine-kitten Envy. All we have to do is keep stalling him with your powers and we can keep you." He smirked, looking at the sleeping dinosaur. "After all, the mystery isn't complaining."

Dipper slipped all the food off the cupboards onto the counter and tables. He growled angrily at the watching cats before he began eating from the pile, the orange glutton jumping on the table and feasting as well. The purple one jumped on the table and held his head high, as if waiting to be fed. The red kitten jumped onto Pride and began scratching and growling while yellow Greed tried to take Gluttony's food.

Dipper glared at the kittens. "SHUT UP!"

Bill snickered from the living room. "S.S. is going to be mad, whaddya think?" He held lust up to his face while envy brushed against him. "You think Mabel kitten will be mad? Yes she will! Yes she will, you adorable." He talked to the kitten in an uncharacteristically cute baby voice. "But that can wait..."

"I hate you!" Was heard from the kitchen.