Gathered around the phone Mandy held horizontally in her right hand was Beth and I. The screen displayed a leaked sex video between a girl from Mandy's science class and Gary. For the past couple of days the video had been circulating and causing turmoil and many different conversations around BerkVille.

   Numerous individuals have referred to the girl in harsh terms, such as "slut," and our school was compelled to release a statement declaring that they will be spearheading the investigation. Seeing the video, of course, caused Beth's father to lecture her for an hour before our meeting, urging her to never dare let something similar happen to her and that he would take care of it should such a situation arise.

"How did you even get this video?" I asked.

"It was posted in my Biology group chat by one of Gary's dumb ass friends. It was so chaotic. Right after it sent Tamia immediately left the chat! I feel so sorry for her!"

"And I bet you the principal is barely gonna do anything about it! I'm gonna write to him everyday to make sure something adequate is done!" Beth slurred.

"Crazy thing is she didn't even know he was recording until after they were done when he showed her the footage and promised he was gonna delete it!"

"He needs to be beheaded!" I said with no guilt or remorse.

The conversation enthralled us so much that we missed a critical storyline moment in the drama we were watching and were perplexed when the actors began shouting at each other out of nowhere. So, as Mandy restarted the episode, Beth went to fetch more snacks from her refrigerator, and I searched for my phone. I found it trapped between the couch cushions, with a new text from Gob.

Gob: Would you like to get pizza? Please? I know this seems out of the blue but I really wanted to spend some time with you. We almost always talk over text and I've been dying to kiss you but you won't let me. And don't take this to heart but I would love to see your face in person, it's way better than looking at the pictures and videos you send me with filters. Let me know if we can today my schedule is free. ❤️

I locked my phone's screen and sat back down, feeling dismal and evil. I knew I wouldn't be responding until the stars were visible in the sky with "Sorry, didn't see your message; maybe next time!" I was too terrified to spend too much time with him and expose myself or he catch on. But I can't keep doing this forever, right? Or can I?

Would he stay with me long enough? Long enough for me to undergo bottom surgery, after which we could do everything I frequently fantasize of doing? When I'm around him, I have this overpowering urge to take off everything I'm wearing and let him take me right there. I'm scared that urge might be too strong for me to control and result in me outing myself when I'm around him.

If I did, perhaps would he be even more interested in me? If he were, it would feel extraordinary, the wick being withered by the intense flaming love I have for him, and as I wander down the road in the pitch darkness, he is there, waiting for me, simply to embrace me. Or will our aimless road journey leave us stranded in the middle of nowhere without any gas?

   But what lingers on my mind more than anything is the stories I've heard about trans women in this exact situation. I don't think Gob is like that but you never know. What if he finds out and goes berserk and kills me. Why must wanting to be loved be this complicated?

I guess telling him is the only way to know and to clear my mind. Fuck it. Let's go.

2:13 p.m
Peaking over the shoulders of Gary's most trusted friends who were saturating their minds with the leaked video was Gibbs. They were in heavy practice mode on the field today partaking in countless tiring drills as they have a big game coming up. They had paused for a short water break when all the guys on the team started sharing around the video and some even showed it to the coach who just simply hyped up Gary and said "He gets a lot of pussy for his age. I wish I was like him back then!"

"How did this even get out?" Gibbs asked, rubbing their attention off the phone.

"Garcon, I don't know! But I been wanting to hit that! And Gary did before me?! I vex!" Answered one sending the rest of the team into laughter.

"You still have a chance! This video just confirmed she be fucking any and everybody! Bitch talking about this was some meaningless casual sex with Gary. Of course it was casual... everybody wears casual!" another player said causing more extreme laughter.

"I thought you would be allergic to pussy and this video would make you wither away with all those faggots and stingy bitches you hang around!" One said to Gibbs causing another chain of laughter.

"What?- um-" he began getting sweaty and feeling tiny.

"You tonguing that transgender too?!" Another comment came at his tower alluring in more destructive laughter.

"Gibbs! Clean up these orange peels really quickly so we can get back to practice!" The coach shouted from across the field, setting up cones.

"Even the coach got you cleaning like a lil bitch!" Mustered in more laughter.

This conversation lingered in Gibb's head all the way through the rest of practice to the pile of traffic he and his father sat in on the way back home. Those guys were nothing less than disgusting. Or were they? He was only saying that because his ego was hurt. They wouldn't dare mock Gary in that manner though.

He hadn't had much interaction with him but his friend group must be a reflection of him! Or should he not be judging a book by its cover? He did want to expand his friendship with different people as he had been receiving slight critics from his teammates for the past couple of weeks for hanging out with us, especially me. And the way they were throwing gay accusations at him lowered his confidence in his masculinity. How couldn't it afterall? They seemed to be the peak of masculinity at school, the alpha dogs, who always had a swarm of girls that clearly would do anything for their attention and validation. Him on the other hand had barely started puberty yet.

"What's on your mind? You okay?" His dad asked disturbing his train of thought.

"Yeah... um... kind of!"

"Why? What's up?"

"Well... There's a couple of guys at school I wanna be friends with but I feel like they're arrogant and a bit disturbing!"

"Ah! Maybe don't think too deeply into it. They're just teenage boys! That's how us men act! Boy, I remember my days, I was the big dawg! Why is it such a big deal anyways?"

"Partly because I feel like Mandy is right and I should stay away from them"

"Ahh... women! Let me tell you something. Women will do anything to change and put a damper on men's friendship! Don't let no woman make you dumb! I did once and I'll always regret it! Women are a bunch of snakes and vermin... especially your mother! Go out and hang with the fellas! They the ones that will hold you down when she fucks up!"

His father has always led the pack. He was the man he always looked up to and achieved to be like. His advice couldn't be nothing less than the truth. So Gibbs for the first time opened the group chat with only the cricket players and boys from our school and began socializing. If only he knew the can of worms he just opened. What was to come.

3:30 p.m
The dogs ran by on happy feet. The sun opened out its wings smothering the land with a flamboyant gilded hue of rays. Chickens announced the time of day. Across the hill, builders and contractors were putting together a lovely house. And as Carson bottled up the scenery with a rich smile stapled to his face, he heard the sound of ice sloshing around in some pineapple juice approaching perched in the hands of Dustin.

"Your grandfather okay?"

"Yeah, yeah! Just had to change his sheets!"

"Oh okay, amazing!" Carson said nervously fidgeting.

"So... you wanna watch a movie?" Dustin was excited to show off the television his mother had bought for the room.

"Yeah, yeah!"

The two sat on opposite sides of the bed and were riveted to the television for the next hour, chuckling, chatting, and progressively inching closer to one another. Popcorn and the ruffles the two had produced with the sheets when they toppled over laughing or in fun spirits nudged each other over, were tailored onto Dustin's bedsheets. Carson nailed this painting of the day into the majesty of his mind as it had brought him the greatest joy. He inhaled the fresh scent of Dustin's linens and the surrounding environment making sure that not one detail was left from his masterpiece.

He was staring into Dustin's being when the two locked eyes and passion engulfed them. The television quickly became a fading noise as they wrapped each other in a warm embrace of love and nervousness. Carson was too afraid to go for it but Dustin wasn't. He connected his lips to his and the two began a fiery kiss filled with temptation. Carson had no experience but Dustin steered the ship over the waves.

Carson's cheeks were plum. This was a moment he had only fantasies about. He didn't want it to end. Dustin's lips felt amazing and the way he kissed him made him feel like he loved him in every way. He felt even more comfortable and fell into his enticing hands as he closed his eyes and felt his hand draw closer to his face and touch him passionately.

That's when Dustin drew his kiss away and Carson opened his eyes desperate to know why. He traced Dustins hand back to his face as he looked up at him. He didn't know what he was doing or if he should tell him to stop. But how could he? Maybe he would like it? Dustin used his thumb to stroke Carson's lip then inch it down his throat deeper and deeper until Carson's gag reflex kicked in and he began to choke and pulled away.

"Oh sorry! My bad, my bad! I'm sorry!"

"Don't worry it's okay I guess... maybe alert me next time, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah! I should've! It's just that I saw it on a porn video I was watching plus when I was with DeeJay I didn't have to ask and he loved it so I thought you would like it too!"

"Oh!" Carson's heart sunk "...DeeJay" he gulped. "Okay... Um... I have to go..."

"Wait... what? What are you doing? Sit down the movie isn't done yet!"

"Sorry um... I have to go!" He said bowling out the door.

"What in the fuck just happened?!" Could be heard bouncing around the walls of Dustin's cranium.

4:56 p.m
   Dustin had to check his phone for any new messages from Carson since a few days ago, he had invited him out with just the two of us, but it now seemed like he was going to be a no-show. He excused himself from the commotion to step outside to call him but Carson didn't pick up. He thought his attitude would've worn out by now and was extra annoyed that he was getting ignored. He retreated inside, rolling his eyes in frustration. We were in Rotter's gaming shop, which is owned by a young, wealthy lad. I give Rotter a lot of flowers because he gave us a place to compete against each other on various consoles and games that we couldn't purchase and make a ton of memories ever since we met. That and the fact that he's cute as hell.

    The AC units above and below provide a rush of cool, comfortable air as soon as you enter. For gaming, consoles ranging from PS5s to XBOXes were installed behind televisions and positioned with seats in front of them. The most delectable and sugary snacks were stocked in vending machines in various locations, staring at you guiltily if you didn't stop to buy them. Kids of all ages but mostly boys usually took up the volume inside and often had to be forced outside due to closing hours, fights that broke out or their mothers coming to retrieve them for not getting home on time. And although a room filled with teenage boys wouldn't really be my scene Rotter kept them in check plus they would be glued to a screen and didn't notice me most of the time. He was friends with all the kids that came in here and all the boys looked up to him and listen to him more than their parents.

    In addition to collecting money behind the counter, he frequently swept the area, cleaned the opulent red carpets, and other areas. The main reason he enjoyed working behind the counter was that it allowed him to see the monitor for the camera systems he had placed. He didn't want any amusing activities to occur. He didn't want his shop to be a birthing station, especially given how large the restrooms were and how crowded and noisy the area was. Sure, girls came there to play, but others only came there with their boyfriends or seeking for boyfriends. Many parents were already watching him with dissatisfied eyes, searching for any excuse to permanently shut him down.

    Once he got back to where we were situated I was irritable having to wait to play. I was stuck on the screen contemplating and calculating my pick for my Smash Bros character. But it didn't matter who I picked I always seemed to lose against Dustin. It seemed like the only games I could beat him at was Ludo and strategy games. But its no surprise considering Dustin grew up a gamer and knew a lot more technical stuff than I do. And he was going to beat Carson at the ignoring game too. In fact, he's the final boss.

"Carson said he's with his environmental club. He can't make it!"

"Fuck! He should be here he buys all the good snacks!"

"Are you admitting to using my boyfriend for snacks?!"

"I eat his M&M's, you eat his asshole. We BOTH do that babe!"

8:45 p.m
   The rest of the household was fast asleep. Beth, wearing only an oversized t-shirt, crawled into her enormous bed. She buried her head in the pillow and drew the covers over her body. Her right hand was sliding all the way down to her crotch, as her left hand held her phone which was the only thing providing light to her room.

After a few screen clicks, she was viewing a pornographic video featuring two lesbian ladies. The more she stared, the more powerful the beast of lust was that was borrowing through her chest became. Her nipples became firm. Her fingers felt incredibly damp as she traced them in, up, and around her vagina, which was getting wetter by the minute.

Every waking minute, her breathing became more labored. Her upper teeth were biting into her lip as her heart started to burst through her skeleton with its pry bar. She was shivering and trying not to scream too loudly when her body gave out and she had an orgasm. She then clawed her hand against her mouth. She lay there for a few minutes, gasping with amazement, dropping her phone in the process. She knew what she had just done but at the same time didn't.

It felt amazing and she knew she would soon become addicted to the act. Quickly turning on the light she observed the mess she had made in her bed. And although she knew what it was she was scared of the cum that was splattered on her sheets and fingers. She snuck out her room to wash her hands and legs, retrieve fresh sheets, put her dirty ones in the washing machine and whilst it spun she scraped every trace of the video she had watched from her search history.

However, her thoughts drifted off. Pornstars essentially just act in such scenarios and move on with their lives. For them, meaningless sex for work is all that's involved in something so intense, personal, and alluring? She would fall in love with her co-star, so props to them. Our world is such a bizarre place. We forget that our bodies are these machines that can store trauma and negative feelings but also have great soothing capabilities.

Hold on.

What if her dead relatives watched her do this act from Heaven? Or ghosts? That thought alone made her bury herself under her covers, not taking the sheets out the dryer till the next day.

12:30 a.m
I awoke in bed with hardly a memory of the day or even a simple notion. Even where I went following the gaming shop was a mystery to me. Did I back out of telling Gibbs and somehow returned home with no memory of it? Or was my sleep so realistic and profound that the urge to inform him snuck it's way into my slumber?