The loud crack of her fingers caused Alejandro to look up at her from the paperwork he was currently working on.

"Sorry," Beadie mumbled, feeling embarrassed under the weight of his gaze.

But to be honest, she felt pathetic. She thought she was a tough soldier and had a place among the men here. That she could be something similar to them. But she was slapped in the face by reality, her soul broken and mind scattered.

She had no place to be here. She was too weak.

"Bella."

The new nickname caused her gaze to shift towards him, not rising higher than his hands. She was too afraid to look him in the eyes after all that happened. She still felt her cheeks heat up at the thought that she just collapsed in his arms.

"We don't have to do this right now," Alejandro spoke softly, like he was afraid that she would run away he would speak louder. Shame washed over her, her entire body heating up.

"I'm fine," Beadie croaked out, clearing her throat to sound more confident. She just had to mask her true feelings like she always did. Not much trouble.

The blonde leaned back in her chair right in front of Alejandro's desk, trying to get more comfortable. He had a somewhat nice office, she observed. It was a little messy, it was a little too dark because the window was too small, and the chair she was sitting on dug into her shoulder blades uncomfortably.

Finally, she raised her eyes to meet his, her heart skipping a beat. She expected him to be cranky, even annoyed that the mission didn't go as planned. He had every right to be angry at her. But the gentle look in his eyes and calm face almost made her cry again.

Maybe she should've reported to Ghost, that way she could blame his scary self for making her cry. Alejandro's gentle and warm nature was way scarier.

"You sure?" he raised an eyebrow at her, and she nodded. She wanted to get this out of the way as soon as possible. She would have plenty of time to cry herself out afterward.

Alejandro let out a sigh and dug around for some paper, the light of his monitor casting a sharper light against his features. Beadie let herself observe him for a little longer than appropriate; she needed to distract her mind a little.

"Well," he cleared his throat as his dark eyes scanned over a paper in his hand, lips pursing before he looked back up at her. "My sources say there was a total of 27 men that died from poisoning, and there are 18 more in hospital. Some of them might not make it through the night."

"Good," the word slipped from her mouth, instantly regretting it.

"You did what you had to."

That wasn't the problem. The problem was that she felt no remorse over killing so many men. They were all awful people, taking advantage of so many girls. And God knows what else did they get their hands dirty before Beadie took them out.

"Is it bad I don't regret it?" the woman asked, continuing to fiddle with her fingers, her pulse quickening. The sweater she received from their storage was too big on her, the sleeves almost swallowing her hands whole.

But she needed this little comfort. Despite the dark sweatpants covering her legs and oversized sweater, she still felt exposed, feeling the silky and airy fabric brushing against her skin. As soon as she got back to the base she threw the thing on the floor, heading for the showers.

But she still felt filthy. Like the darkness of the mansion seeped into her pores, poising her the same way she did the men.

"No," Alejandro shook his head, placing down the paper atop of many others. She didn't even know what color his desk was, it was so full of papers and folders. The messiness calmed her down a little.

She was glad she wasn't the biggest mess inside the building.

His gentle touch on her hand snapped her out of it.

"We saved 52 women out of there, thanks to you," he said like he was truly proud of her. Beadie blinked away the tears that wanted to come out. "We got Sin Nombre, too. It all turned out good."

Not for everybody.

"How's Isabel?" Beadie asked, her voice breaking in the middle. It felt wrong to say her name out loud, afraid to cause any more damage to the poor woman.

"She's recovering at a nearby hospital. Rudy is there to make sure she's alright."

Beadie nodded, averting her gaze again. The images of Isabel's abused body surfaced in her mind again, her chest piercing with pain and tears coming to blur her vision.

"We can stop," Alejandro offered once again, seeing how much it affected her.

Beadie shook her head and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. The material darkened where her tears got absorbed, taunting her about her weakness even more.

"I'm fine," her tone snapped, getting fed up. She didn't want to feel so weak. But she had no idea how to be strong. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Alejandro reached over to snatch a pen, flicking the cap off with a swift motion. "Tell me what you remember. Names, titles, anything that could help us. Even descriptions are useful."

So she did. Beadie spilled everything she managed to gather in that one week at the mansion. It wasn't easy to talk about some stuff like how the girls were treated during their stay, but it got a little easier with time as she talked about it more and the people responsible for it.

Alejandro took notes of everything she said, asking questions here and there, making sure they didn't skim over things. They talked for hours, ignoring how their conversation bled from the late night hours into dawn, the whole world quieting down around them.

Beadie talked for hours, her knees pulled to her chest, trying to get as comfortable as possible. She was on the verge of falling asleep but eventually, she got out everything she needed. The calm air around them, Alejandro's deep voice and the fact she didn't have a full night's sleep in a week almost made her fall asleep right then and there.

But despite her tiredness, she didn't miss the way his jaw tensed whenever he looked at her. She wondered if she did something wrong, but his words were quick to soothe her nerves.

"I think we're done here," Alejandro cleared his throat, causing Beadie's half-closed eyes to spring open.

"Finally," she murmured, starting to untangle her legs from the weird position. She didn't expect him to hear her words though, so his chuckle took her off-guard.

"I'm sorry it took so long," Alejandro leaned back in his chair, a low groan leaving his lips as he finally stretched out his muscles. "Do you have any other questions?"

Why didn't Graves check up on me not even once?

But she felt stupid for even wanting to ask that. Whenever she thought about her commander, she just felt annoyed. If it were the other way around, she wouldn't rest until she made sure her second-in-command was safe and okay. Hell, even if it was just another squad member.

She even worried for Soap's wellbeing, despite barely knowing him.

She was just disappointed, but she wouldn't let it show for nothing.

"Can I get back to my room now?" Beadie asked, standing from her seat and ignoring how her muscles ached. She felt like she could sleep for a week straight.

"Sure," he stood up as well, slightly bending down and pushing a few more buttons on his keyboard. "I'll escort you back."

"Thank you," a genuine smile appeared on her face, not even feeling bad for accepting his offer. A part of her romantic soul was touched by him, but the main reason she accepted was because she forgot where her room was. There were too many corridors in this place.

Even though she was closer to the door, Alejandro was faster and managed to get to it faster, opening the door for her. She thanked her softly as she went ahead, something stirring inside of her. Nobody ever acted like this with her, this polite. She didn't know that men could act like this.

As they walked side by side in the silent hallways, her eyes scanned their surroundings. It was a military base, but it had a warm and cozy feeling about it. The numerous pictures on the walls, the warm colors inside, and even just the feel of the place reminded her of how a home should feel like.

"The boys are throwing a party tomorrow night," Alejandro broke the silence, catching her attention. Her questioning look made him smile a little as he looked down at the floor, hands shoved in his pockets. "It's tradition after bigger missions. We like to remind ourselves that there are still good things."

"That sounds lovely," Beadie smiled at him. "Is there room for one more person?"

"Of course," he glanced at her, mirroring her smile. "We'd like to have you there."

"It would be my pleasure," her smile widened, the flirting undertone of her voice not slipping by his attention.

A comfortable silence settled between them as they continued their way, the hallways getting more and more familiar to her. She was sure she could manage from here, but he was too nice to turn him down. And she enjoyed Alejandro's company.

Her hand wrapped around the cold metal key in her pocket once she spotted her room number on the door.

"That's me," Beadie pointed, their steps slowing down and eventually stopping at her door.

She fiddled with her keys for a little longer than necessary, trying to delay their splitting. She just talked with him for hours, and still, she felt like she could spend more time with him. She wanted to spend more time with him.

"Can I ask you something?"

Anything, she wanted to blurt out. But before she could look too desperate, she just nodded with a small smile on her face.

"Who did that?"

"Did what?" Beadie's eyebrows furrowed as she looked up, flinching as she felt a feather-light touch on the side of her face.

The small action made her look up, her wide blue eyes looking up at him. Her breath hitched as she realized how close he was, his head tilted down to get a better look at her face. His thumb grazed her cheeks, her entire face flaming up under his tender touch.

And then Beadie realized she was not wearing makeup anymore. Meaning her nasty bruise was on full display since her shower.

Now her entire being blazed like she was set on fire, shame making her cheeks tint a bright red as she tilted her head down, trying to hide it. Beadie's jaw clenched tightly as she scolded herself for forgetting about it in the first place. No wonder he looked at her so weirdly in the past hours.

"It's nothing-"

"Give me a name, Bella."

His dark tone caused her eyes to wander back to him, staring up into his dark eyes through her lashes. His previous humorous self disappeared, taken over by someone much more sinister. The darkness of his eyes made her shiver in the best way, involuntarily leaning into his touch.

I should pull away and never talk about this again.

But something kept her there. She just wanted to enjoy his touch and his attention a little longer. And for some reason, she felt like she could open up to him.

"I don't know his name," Beadie replied in a hushed tone, a disapproving grunt leaving him. His big hand held her bruised face so tenderly like she was made out of glass. "He was a guard. But Valeria cut his hand off when he touched me."

His eyebrows furrowed and a confused look overtook his hard features. She imagined she had the same expression on her face when she found out that Valeria was El Sin Nombre all along.

Beadie couldn't believe it, but she couldn't question it. They heard themselves as she admitted to it, being cocky about it, too. Beadie watched with her jaw on the floor as Graves and Ghost escorted her to a metal container posing as a temporary cell and interrogation room for her.

The blond wanted to have a chance to talk to her, preferably in private. She just wanted to ask why. Why did she allow other women to get used and abused like that inside her house? Why didn't she do something?

But judging the way Alejandro looked at Valeria or the few heated words she caught flying between them, it was clear he wouldn't let her talk to Valeria in private. And he became overly protective of her since the mansion.

"Valeria?" Alejandro moved back a bit, not believing his ears. Beadie nodded, his touch shifting on her skin. She screamed mentally as he removed his touch, letting his arm fall back against his side.

Beadie didn't know when she felt such a caring touch on her skin last.

"Yes. I sneaked out to get some poison and a guard caught me. He hit me, Valeria saw it. Took his hand in return. I don't know what happened to him after that."

A few creases appeared on his forehead as he was thinking, lips pursed. The guard's pained yell still lingered in her memory, making goosebumps appear on her skin as she thought back. She was sure a lot of things will haunt her for a long time, but she'll try her best to get over it as soon as possible. For the sake of her team.

As her eyes studied his face, only now she noticed the dark circles under his eyes and his slightly paler complexion. He looked exhausted, only the shadow of what he was when she first met him and it made her heart break.

She was so busy with her own heartbreak and trauma she didn't notice how much it affected others as well. She wanted to kick herself.

"You should go rest," Beadie broke the silence around them, his eyes remaining trained on the door right beside her. "You look tired."

His eyes finally shifted towards her, locking with hers. She gave him a warm smile as she leaned her shoulders against the wall, hoping she looked a little better than him. But chances were that she looked a hell of a lot worse.

"I still have to finish up the report," he pushed himself off the wall, heading towards where they came from. Beadie couldn't help but turn and follow him with her eyes. He felt her gaze on her and turned around as well, backing up in the hallway, his eyes captivating hers. „Sleep well, Bella."

"You too, Ale."

Upon hearing the newfound nickname, a smile stretched across his face, filling his eyes with a little more life. Beadie couldn't help but smile along with him, blushing under his gaze.

She would've liked to spend more time with him, but maybe another time. Maybe tomorrow night would be the perfect opportunity to get closer to him.

Shifting towards her door, she finally opened it with her key, glancing above her shoulder one last time. Alejandro did the same at that exact moment, both of them stealing one last glance before Beadie stepped inside her room, closing the door after herself and smiling like an idiot.

She had no idea why he made her heart beat faster and why she felt like this when he was around. But she was ready to explore this feeling further.

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i read so much fanfic where the mmc is obsessive, controlling and shit that i felt like writing ale like this. he's a softie for beadie and i love it

question: what's your birthstone?