3 weeks later

I tried to lay in my bed, a place I used to love and literally look forward to, but still I couldn't get comfortable. Somehow in my mind, sitting up on a chair was better for me than a big double bed. This guy really had corrupted my mind. I wonder how long it'll take before I'll be back to my old self... if I ever revert back!
I let out a loud sigh and sat up, getting out of my bed and walking out of my bedroom, through the lounge and into the kitchen where I got myself a glass of water.
Three weeks had passed and I was still traumatised. I still couldn't even look at a pan of food, eat anything that resembled the texture of that muck he fed us or sleep in my bed. My sleep pattern is all over the place as if I had long term jet lag. I was still recovering from the drugs too, often finding myself irritable, scratching at my skin, shouting at people, feeling crazy and then depressed. This guy had literally ruined my life - but at least I still had one. I took several large gulps of water and sat down on the wooden chair at the dining table. This was the one that resembled the one he had tied us to the most, and recently it was the only way I'd get some sleep. I lay my head on my hands and once again drifted off to sleep on the table top.
But again, his face was my nightmare.
I had the same recurring dream every night near enough. It varied a little each time but the same details were always in it.
I dream that I'm still stuck in that basement with Penny and that the FBI are coming to save us but, as I dreamt while actually down there, he shoots Spencer and makes me watch as he suffers. He fights the other two agents and kills them, but pulls Spencer over and ties him to another chair at the table. Then a man comes down and says he's here to marry us and with Penny and Spencer there, he marries me and that guy and his awful mouth kiss me and I can't get away from him. He strokes my hair and face and grins evilly as he does it, showing those decaying yellow teeth to us all. When Spencer tries to save me, he hurts him further and as he screams out in pain, I wake up.
I jolt awake and feel beads of sweat dripping from my face. I can't live like this anymore. I just can't deal with it. I'm not strong enough. I stand up and walk back into my bedroom, grabbing my mobile phone and opening the phone book. Habit overtakes and before I know it, I've highlighted Penny's name. My heart pulls and pains as I strain to hold in the sob that wants to escape. The corners of my eyes prick as tears begin to take over my vision and make it blurry, before slowly falling down my face. I'd always go to her for advice, whether it was 1am or 1pm I could always call her and talk to her, and if she couldn't answer the phone I'd leave a voicemail and she would call be back. She was just one of those rare people who changed your life so much, but now she's gone. I would never be able to call her for advice or to chat or have her round so we could drink wine and laugh and eat pizza. He ruined that.
I scrolled my phone book, desperate to find someone I could call. I needed to hear someone's voice, I needed some sanity. I went through my contacts twice before I stopped on his name. I hadn't really spoken to him since this had happened but now he seemed like the perfect person to talk to. Spencer Reid.
I checked the time, it was pretty early in the morning and no doubt he was probably asleep but if I didn't call, I'd never know if he could have helped me. I pressed call without a second thought and held it to my ear, the ringing lasting longer than I thought it ever could. He must have been asleep. That or he was just ignoring my call, knowing it was going to be a long conversation that required a lot of effort and attention. I made my way back to that wretched wooden table once more and slumped on the chair. This was hopeless. I was just about to hang up when I heard the ringing stop and some shuffling was heard.

"H-hello?" Spencer's voice filled my ears and I let out a smile. Just like it had when I was a hostage, his voice had calmed me instantly.

"Spencer, it's Grace, I'm sorry to call you at this time... Were you asleep?" I spoke quietly, in almost a whisper just like I had when I'd spoken to him the first time. Damn these habits, I just wanted to act normal again. My heart sped up as I heard his voice again.

"No, we just got back from a case. I've only just got home. Is everything okay?" He sounded worried about me. Something that I hadn't experienced in quite a long time. I looked down at the table I was sat at and sighed, getting up and walking over to the sofa which I plonked myself down on. I needed to get out of these habits. I needed to train myself to be normal again.

"Erm..." I hesitated. Do I really tell him what's wrong? I scratched the back of my head with my free hand and sighed.

"You can tell me." Spencer said quickly. "Whatever it is, I'm listening."

"I'm really struggling." I said, emotions hitting me quicker than I thought they would. I was already crying, clutching the phone like it was the only thing saving my life. My head was pounding as millions of things went round in it. Memories, flashbacks, things to say now. When did my life become such a mess? "I keep having nightmares, every single night, and I'm sleeping at my dining room table because I can't sleep in my bed. It's hopeless!" I let out an almighty sob into the phone. Finally having someone to hear what I've been holding in was quite a relief.

"It's okay Grace." He began. "People who experience what you have don't get over it quickly. You're doing really well so far! You should be proud of yourself. It will take time. It's a big shock to your mind and body when something like that happens and you have to teach it to get it back to normal." His words were laced with concern and worry but also with love. He sounds proud of me. My heart swelled at the thought and I found myself drifting off into my own world, thinking about him. He's been so helpful to me, saved me from my darkest times and protected me when no one else could. He is my knight in shining armour and I need to show him how grateful I am.

"Spencer?" I asked, not even caring if he'd finished his sentence.

"Yeah?" He answered quickly.

"Could you come round for a bit and keep me company?"