[not mine]

Aries: angriest asshole award

Taurus: number two and loving it awards

Gemini: superficial nervous wreck award

Cancer: crybaby emotionpants award

Leo: egotist extraordinaire award

Virgo: petty perfectionist award

Libra: indecisive "individual" award

Scorpio: secretive bastard award

Sagittarius: expert exaggerator award

Capricorn: condescending parent award

Aquarius: complete weirdo award

Pisces: idealistic idiot award