Chapter 23

"Abbie!"

My eyes darted out frantically, scanning through the mass of people. Frustration bubbled up inside of me when the reporter's pursuits failed to cease. They were acting as though everything was fine, as if this was normal.

This wasn't normal.

My daughter had slipped from my grasp and these strangers hadn't noticed; they didn't even seem to care.

Through the panic and the crowd, I hadn't noticed another, more familiar car pull onto the street, whipping quickly into the driveway before Emily and Dustin stumbled out.

"Are you people out of your god damn mind?" Emily yelled.

Pushing her way through the hoard of cameras until she reached me, she wrapped her arms safely around me, giving me the much-needed support.

"And who are you?" one of the reporters asked curiously.

"I'm her fucking sister, that's who, and if you and your group of paid minions don't move back so she can find her daughter, there will be hell to pay."

A commotion began at Emily's open-ended threat, though the words simply went in one ear and out the other. The screaming and the fighting was all too much, and just when I thought the weight of the situation would crush me, a soft whimper caught my attention. I didn't know how it was possible to hear it over the crowd, but when I did, my head snapped down, my heart breaking when I saw my daughter clutching her leg in pain. She was resting on the sidewalk, squished between the masses of people. Her eyes were red and rimmed with tears while her chin trembled, a frightened expression masking her face.

Shaking myself free from Emily's arms, I dropped to my knees immediately, pushing everyone away until I had my baby in my arms again.

"It's okay, it's okay," I cooed in her ear, running my hand over the top of her hair to smooth it down.

I was trying to be reassuring and put on a brave face, but on the inside I was trembling.

"I'm scared," she mumbled into my shoulder.

The words were like a punch to the gut, and knowing that I was part of the reason this had happened was painstakingly horrible. Though, due to my actions, everyone finally seemed to realize what had happened, taking a few steps back from Abbie and I to give us room to breathe.

The shutter of cameras was enough to notice that, while they had backed away, they were still looking for a story, and would stop at nothing to get it.

Anger coursing through my veins, I opened my mouth to give them all a piece of my mind, but was stopped when Dustin voice rang through the crowd.

"If all of you aren't off this street in less than a minute, I'm calling the police," he announced, loud and authoritatively. He held his cell phone up as well, letting the press know that he wasn't kidding around. "You're all trespassing on this property, not caring that you're creating a nuisance and a hazard for us, as well as the neighbours, and on top of all that, you've managed to injure a sweet and innocent young girl. I'm sure all of your bosses will be thrilled when you go into work tomorrow with a restraining order taped to your backs."

I wasn't able to tell how much of his threat was exaggerated to get his point across, but it worked. Many eyes widened as they realized that, amongst the chaos, my daughter had gotten hurt, and they knew that if word got out, they'd be the ones under siege.

I was too focused on calming Abbie down to pay attention to the group of reporters, but when Abbie's breathing finally started to level out, I lifted my head to see that the crowd had disappeared, the last of them piling into their van and rushing off down the street.

"Zoe," Emily said, her voice filled with worry as she regarded me with glazed eyes, "That doesn't look so good."

Abbie whimpered again at Emily's observation, having nodded down to her leg, where the bottom of her pant leg had rolled up. The skin near her ankle was swollen, progressively getting worse the further down you looked.

"You should get her to a hospital," Emily continued, biting her lip anxiously. "We can drive if you need it."

My mind was frantic but my movements were slow. One arm wound its way around Abbie's back, while one slipped under her bent knees, carefully lifting her off the ground. Her eyes stung with tears as I jostled her into a more comfortable position, and her arms let go of her leg as they wrapped tightly around my neck.

"It hurts momma."

"We're going to get you to a doctor Abbie, don't worry," I said quietly, kissing the side of her head while it lay on my shoulder. Looking back up at Emily, I nodded solemnly. "Let's go."

The hospital wasn't where I'd envisioned spending my evening.

Most of the ride was spent with Abbie clutching tightly at my arm, the two of us in the back seat of Dustin's car as he drove as quickly as possible. We got stuck in rush hour traffic, and after struggling to find a parking spot, we walked through the sliding doors of the hospital, only to be hit with the faint smell of antiseptic and the somber environment of the waiting room.

Dustin and Emily found a set of free seats while I brought Abbie up with me to the front desk.

The nurse behind the counter looked like she was at the end of a long and exhausting shift, and her eyes veered towards us as we approached.

"What can I do for you?" she asked, grabbing a clipboard from a shelf beside her.

"Umm, my daughter fell over on the sidewalk and she wasn't able to stand up," I explained, tweaking the story a bit. "She was scraped up pretty badly and even though I don't think it's broken, there's something wrong with her ankle."

The nurse nodded, writing down a brief description of what I'd just told her on the top of the form, and I gulped when my eyes caught her checking off a 'possible fracture' box.

"Here," she said, sliding the clipboard over to me, "Just take a seat and fill out what you can of this. Bring it back up when you're done, but just so you know, there may be a bit of a wait until a doctor can see her."

I nodded with understanding, having already figured that the wait times at the LA hospital were abysmal. Balancing the clipboard in one hand and supporting Abbie in the other, I headed over to where Emily and Dustin were seated.

While waiting, I was unable to stop my eyes from taking in the other patients in the room. There was an elderly couple that had fallen asleep on the other side of the room, a few teenagers that looked to have been in a fight, and a handful of worried parents, stressing just as much as I was while their children sat beside them.

The longer I sat in the hard plastic chair, the more I seemed to let my anxiety take a hold of me. Abbie had managed to overcome some of her pain and fall asleep for an hour or two, but I was stuck waiting, watching as one by one, the room emptied out, only to be replaced with newer guests that sauntered through the doors.

Finally, hours later, after Dustin had gone out to pick up some food, and Abbie was shaken awake, a doctor stepped out from behind the double doors near the back of the room with a clipboard and called Abbie back, ready to take a look at her.

"Sorry, for the wait Ms. Hamilton," he started. He was young, maybe in his early thirties, but I could see that his hair was starting to grey in places from the high-stress that came with his job. "Now can you tell me what happened?"

"But I already told the nurse," I said, shifting nervously, "We were walking home this afternoon and she tripped on the sidewalk."

His eyes glanced my way for a brief moment, though he kept the majority of his attention on cleaning the cuts and scrapes on Abbie's legs. "I know, that's what I read on your file," he replied, nodding to the clipboard that I'd filled out, now lying on the table next to the hospital bed. "But, there are bruises on her shoulders, the top of her arms, and her back, and if what you're telling me is the truth, I'm forced to believe that the bruises were given to her some other way."

An eyebrow of his raised, and I shrunk back, ducking my head. He knew that it hadn't just been a simple fall, but that someone, or something, had also badgered her around, and right now, he was assuming that person was me.

"It wasn't me," I spoke quietly, my voice raw with emotion, knowing that I would never be able to lay a hand on my little girl.

"I know it wasn't you," he said, "But if you won't tell me who it was, I can't be of any help to you."

"I don't know if you could be of any help anyways," I muttered.

"What do you mean?"

I sighed. "Do you know who Ryan Adams is?"

The doctor, who's name tag read Phillip, nodded. "He's been a few good movies I've seen recently," he replied, though he looked confused as to where this conversation was headed. "But what does he have anything to do with these injuries?"

"Umm... well, he's my boyfriend."

He looked at me skeptically. "So, you're telling me that Ryan Adams was the one who hurt your daughter?"

"NO! God no," I shook my head venomously, "Ryan's my boyfriend yes, but he'd never hurt Abbie." I ran a hand stressfully through my hair, making it a bigger mess than it already was. "The two of us decided to make our relationship public a few days ago, and somehow the press found out everything there is to know about me. I thought I could just shrug it all off, but then I was walking home with Abbie and our street was packed with news vans and paparazzi. They ambushed us, and Abbie ended up getting stuck in the crossfire."

"And I just didn't know what to do," I continued in a panic. "There were so many of them, and none of them were listening to me, and I wasn't strong enough to push them back." I finally took in a deep breath, quenching the fire in my lungs with a heap of oxygen. "Sorry, I just, I couldn't do anything to help her until my sister and her boyfriend got there."

"It's quite alright," he smiled, though there was pity in his eyes, "But if being in a relationship with him is putting your daughter in danger, than you might want to think a bit harder about what's more important to you. It's important to be with someone who makes not only you, but also your daughter, feel safe. You need to be careful with who you give the key to your life to, because if it's the wrong person, you can end up falling in a downwards spiral that's difficult to come back from."

I breathed out slowly, watching as the doctor slowly undid Abbie's shoe, touching and prodding at her ankle carefully. "I didn't think you were a therapist too," I replied lightly, though his words had made an imprint in the back of my mind.

You need to be careful.

The sides of his lips tugged upwards, the corners crinkling. "I have a soft spot for children," he admitted, "So if it makes their lives easier, I sometimes have to be the one to tell parents exactly what they don't want to hear." I nodded, biting my lip as he turned to face me. "I do have some good news for you though. Abbie's ankle isn't broken."

"Oh, thank god."

"It is however, badly bruised, as well as twisted," he explained. "She's going to have to stay off of it for a few days, and I'm going to wrap it so she doesn't put any unnecessary pressure on it. If you don't have any pain medicine at home for her, I suggested stopping by the hospital's pharmacy on your way home to pick up a children's dosage, because she might experience stunts of pain on and off tonight and tomorrow."

"Thank you, thank you so much," I said, leaning back against the wall in relief.

"Not a problem, it's my job," he replied, "And once I'm finished wrapping the gauze I'll go and get the discharge papers. She's not required to stay for observation, but if you find anything worsening, please come back so I can take another look."

I felt worthless, knowing there was nothing I could do as I waited beside the bed, holding Abbie's hand while the doctor carefully wrapped her ankle. Every so often, as he moved the gauze around to tighten it, I'd catch her wince with pain, and a dull pick would poke at my heart each time.

It didn't take long for him to finish, and when the gauze was secured, he instructed us to sit tight while he collected the discharge papers.

Less than a minute after he'd turned and left the room, the door swung back open. Emily rushed into the room, Dustin right behind her, and crouched down on the opposite side of the bed. "Please tell me she's okay," she begged.

I took a deep breath, trying to fight the claustrophobic feeling that sitting in this hospital room gave me, but all I could feel were my lungs and throat tightening up. "She's fine," I croaked, coughing for a moment before standing up. "I need some fresh air. Are you guys okay to watch her until the doctor comes back?" I asked with pleading eyes.

Emily was too busy fussing over her niece, explaining to her all the up sides that came with getting injured, like eating all the ice cream you wanted and laying down during the day, but Dustin nodded. He was standing back from the bed, hovering around the doorway as he motioned towards the exit.

"We'll be fine," he replied, the ghost of a smile pulling at his lips, "Go."

Mouthing a quick thank you, I rushed out of the room. Everything seemed to be building up at once, only for reality to come crashing down, leaving me gasping for air. I no longer had a hold on my normal life. Between my published past, the horrid reporters, and my daughters current predicament, I suddenly realized that I didn't have a clue what was happening.

I knew where the problem was though.

It had all been my fault. I had chosen to fall in love with a wonderful, sweet, and caring guy, only to be slapped in the face when things began to fall out of place. He was the perfect person, but the doctor had been right, I couldn't ignore the fact that while his life remained in the eyes of the public, mine might never be safe again.

There was a reason I never really dated before Ryan, and that had been because Abbie was always what was most important to me, and it was as if falling in love made me forget that. She wasn't someone I could put up for gamble, and it broke my heart to know that, while keeping her safe, I was loosing another.

Amidst my self-pity, I was mindlessly wandering through the halls of the hospital, catching my breath and allowing my mind to run wild. What I didn't expect was to be pulled from my thoughts as I neared the waiting room, walking straight into the arms of the person that made my thoughts all the more real.

"Zoe," Ryan whispered, his lips pressing softly against my forehead, the imprint searing into my skin, "Thank god you're alright."

For a brief moment, I let myself sink into his embrace, cloaking myself with the warmth and the comfort that he offered. His arms drew me in, and I felt like I had broken through the surface, finally able to breathe again. Though the next wave hit me all too soon, my instinct kicking in as I pulled myself back, letting my arms fall to my side while his hands hovered loosely on my hips.

"Ryan, what are you doing here?" I asked slowly, having not expected to see him here.

"Emily called me," he replied easily, almost as though our fight this afternoon hadn't happened.

I sighed, closing my eyes. He hadn't noticed the deadpan tone my words had been asked in, too hyped up on the situation at hand to grasp the obvious.

"Is Abbie okay?" Ryan continued worriedly, his eyes darting around as though the answer would suddenly appear. He dragged a hand through his hair stressfully, shaking his head. "I should have never let you go this afternoon; I just knew something like this would happen. If I ever find out who leaked your address, or figure out who was involved with this, I swear I'll go straight to the police."

His anger was rising, his jaw clenched, and while I knew the words were meant to be reassuring, they were anything but.

"Ryan," I said, cutting him off. His posture stiffened, facial expression rigid, as I looked up at him. The exact moment when he looked into my eyes, I saw a flash of sadness and understanding wash over him, his taut expression becoming more prominent. "I thought, this afternoon when I," I said shakily, trying to get the words out. I closed my eyes, breathing in before the words flowed out of me, cold and detached. "I told you I needed space."

"But..."

"And this is exactly why," I continued, knowing that my resolve would weaken if I let him speak. I couldn't change my mind again, not right know, not in this situation, and not with what was at stake. Taking a few steps back, I continued, "Look what happened to Abbie this afternoon, and that was just by accident. What if someone actually tried to hurt her or me because we were close to you? I don't know if I want to take the chance with something like that. Taking a few steps back is what I need right now, because I don't think I can live my life under constant scrutiny."

"I understand that," he replied weakly, his hand trembling as it reached out for me, "But if you'd just let me..."

"Please!" I interrupted him, my voice rising louder than I'd intended.

I felt the air leave my lungs when I saw his eyes widen in shock. He was the one that was trying to fix this, he wanted to stay, but I was the one unwilling to risk it.

Sometimes true love required a sacrifice; one that was for the best intentions, but succeeded in breaking both hearts at once.

I clenched my eyes shut. "Please," I repeated, just above a whisper as I slowly began to step backwards, "Just go."

Without saying another word, I didn't look back as I traced my path back to Abbie's room. Pushing the door open, I saw that the doctor was there now, and as I sank back down into a seat beside the bed, I saw Emily's gaze flit to meet mine. There was no hiding how I was feeling, the emotionless mask having dropped as I left Ryan standing alone in the middle of a hospital. Her eyes turned sympathetic, but I shook my head slightly, indicating I didn't want to talk about it.

Listening to Abbie speak with the doctor, a small smile on her face, I was more than a little relieved that she would be okay, but after what had just transpired, I didn't know if I would be.

After all, a broken heart takes the longest to heal.

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The night that followed was a hard one.

Not only did Abbie have trouble sleeping, a side effect of having her ankle throb with pain every hour or so, jolting her awake, but my phone just didn't seem to want to shut up.

Texts, calls, and e-mails were coming through constantly. While a fair few of them were from Ryan, wanting to talk or simply wishing me a goodnight, a majority of them were from strangers, or from people I'd met briefly back in Arizona. They'd caught wind that I'd moved to Los Angeles, and suddenly, now that I was in a relationship with Ryan Adams, they wanted to re-connect and catch up.

When the clock on my bedside table read well after three in the morning, I finally took the initiative and shut my phone off, tucking it safely into the bottom of a dresser drawer so that I knew I wouldn't be disturbed.

Waking up the next morning was difficult, and when my alarm went off, I knew that I didn't have a choice in the matter. My daughter needed me today, and although I had a full day of class, I didn't trust anyone else with her right now.

I just wanted to be with her, to make sure she was okay.

The day started off uneventful at best, with a simple breakfast after Emily had left for work and carefully getting Abbie ready for the day. A few of her bruises and cuts were still quite raw, causing her to flinch when I helped her pull her loose fitting dress over her head, but overall, she looked better than she had the night before.

Knowing that she had to keep her ankle elevated for a better part of the day, I set her up with a little play area in the living room. She could see the television from where she sat with a box of toys I'd brought down for her, and her leg was propped up on a pillow, relieving some of the pain that came with the injury.

While she played, I brought my notes and textbooks down to the living room, wanting to keep an eye on her while I tried to go over the topics I figured would be covered in the classes I was skipping. There wasn't much to memorize, but a few new concepts and ideas that were outlined for me to go over and address.

Learning from home felt like a good decision on my behalf, until the doorbell rang just after lunch.

My hand stilled on top of my notebook, my grip on my pen tightening as Abbie looked up to me with curiously wide eyes.

When the bell rang once more, thoughts began to rush through my head. Maybe it was more reporters, looking to see if I was home, or maybe it was Ryan, wanting to talk after the dust had settled. Either way, I didn't have the energy or the desire to talk, so I stayed seated.

After one more ring, the bell finally stopped, and I was able to shrug off the interruption once Abbie asked me to help her put in a movie she wanted to watch. The moment flew from my mind, but when Emily came home hours later, talking with someone that I couldn't quite pinpoint, my eyebrows scrunched up in confusion, only to rise in surprise when her and another rounded the corner.

"Greta?"

The woman that had raised me and taught me almost everything I knew was standing in my living room. The same woman I hadn't seen in almost six months and was the one person from home I missed everyday.

"Greta!" Abbie exclaimed loudly, struggling to get up from her spot on the floor with her injury. She wiggled around for a moment, against my protests, before Greta finally realized that she'd been hurt.

"Oh honey," Greta said gently, moving towards Abbie to save her the struggle. "How are you? You've grown so much!"

After a quick conversation and catch up with Abbie, where Greta noticeably didn't say a thing about the obvious injury, I started up a movie, pressing play as Greta, Emily and I retreated to the kitchen.

"Not that I'm not happy to see you, but what are you doing here?" I asked, disbelief still clouding my brain. I could only come up with one reason as to why she wouldn't be back in Arizona, and it sent a jolt of anger through my blood. "Our parents didn't fire you, did they?"

Emily's head snapped up immediately at my accusation, her eyes widening at the possibility.

The tension simmered quickly though, as Greta shook her head with a smile, a hint of a laugh escaping her lips. "Heavens no," she replied, "I quit."

The tail end of her reply was what had the both of us looking at her in bewilderment. "You quit?"

Her smile softened as she beckoned us towards her. "Come here," she said, wrapping an arm around either of us. "The only reason that I stayed with your parents for so long was because of you two. I would've never worked for people like them if I hadn't gotten to raise two smart, beautiful, and kind-hearted girls from the get-go. But you're both grown up now, and there's no need for me to stay in a house all alone, working for those tyrants."

My eyes grew in shock before I burst into laughter, Emily joining me soon after.

"What?" Greta asked, a smirk crinkling her mouth, "It's true."

The conversation took a turn, ranging from how we'd been to what she'd been up to since I'd left, and through it all, we were happy to invite her to stay with us for as long as she wanted.

Later that night, once everyone had gone to bed, I was tackled by a moment of weakness. Opening up my dresser drawer, I pulled out my phone, turning the power back on as I headed down to the living room. Once it shot to life, a mass of missed messages and calls began to pour through. They were similar to the few I'd seen the night before, and were the very ones that I'd wanted to avoid, but my curiosity overpowered my logical sense of thought.

Scrolling through the messages, most of them were too upbeat, all wanting one thing or another from me, but there was the odd spiteful one. Those ones were from blocked numbers or unsolicited phones, simply sending me messages or voicemails acknowledging me as nothing but scum on the bottom of the ocean floor.

The tears began to build as I went through those messages in particular, not able to help myself, and I froze, stopping mid sniffle as footsteps battered down the stairs. Turning my head to the right, I saw Greta's face appear through the darkness, the only light around us was the small beams shining from my phone.

"Sorry," I said quietly, my face apologetic, "I didn't realize you were still awake."

"It's alright dear," she waved me off, "Now do you want to talk about what's got you up so late and close to tears?"

She was too perceptive for her own good, and as I brought my hand up to wipe away the water from my eyes, she moved closer, flicking on a lamp so that I couldn't hide in the shadows. "It's nothing," I said unconvincingly.

"Oh?" she raised an eyebrow, "So it has nothing to do with this famous boyfriend of yours?"

"If you could even call him that anymore," I muttered, ducking my head as I switched off my phone once more.

Greta's eyes were soft and sympathetic as she placed her hand on my shoulder, still hovering behind the couch. "How about we have a talk?" she offered, "I'll even make some hot chocolate if you want?"

The prospect of a warm cup of chocolaty goodness was too good to pass up, and I found myself nodding, the corner of my lips twitching upwards.

A few minutes later, the two of us were settling into the couch, mugs in hand, and I was brought back to the first night I'd spent in this house. They were less confusing times, and all I remembered Emily telling me was that I'd meet a guy out here that would make me feel like his first priority.

And I had, but Ryan wasn't the type of guy I had envisioned myself falling for.

"Well, I saw some of the articles about you," Greta started, causing my skin to flush. "They were actually one of the reasons I came down here."

"What? You weren't just missing us?" I asked teasingly, trying to lighten the mood.

She rolled her eyes and cracked a smile. "Of course I was," Greta replied, "But I also wanted to make sure you were okay."

The smile that graced my face was sad, as I relayed wordlessly exactly what she already knew; I wasn't okay.

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong sweetie, or are you going to make me guess?"

I sighed. "It's just," I paused, struggling to find the right words, "Most of my childhood was spent trying to appease my parents and make them proud of me. I felt like I was under a microscope, being watched by everyone around me until I stepped out of line or messed up in some way. Leaving home, it was a weight off my shoulders, knowing that I wouldn't have to act like someone I wasn't in public, but dating Ryan, I feel like I'm right back where I started. People are looking at me, and I'm not sure I want to be someone in the spotlight."

She didn't say a word as I sat there and explained, just nodding understandingly and waiting until I was finished to reply. "Do you love him?"

It was such a simple question, with such a simple answer.

"I do."

"Then do you want to know what I think?" I nodded. "I think thank you need to take some time for yourself, and really figure out what you want, and what you're willing to give," she replied, her words heavy with her own beliefs. "Love is a tricky thing to navigate, and it's never easy. A person can fall in love one hundred times and never find the spark that exists between two people after just a simple hello. Others though, they're lucky. They may feel their heartbeat accelerate and their whole world shift when they meet that one special person, but one of the most important things that people tend to forget is that you can't let the love you have for one person consume you. You need to be able to see clearly, to know when you're falling too quickly or when you're moving in a direction you're uncomfortable with."

"If you need some space, it means you're thinking clearly," she continued. "If Ryan is able to see that, he shouldn't judge you for it. When all of this is over and you come to a decision, if he truly cares about you, he'll be there waiting, and if not, you know that you're love story wasn't meant to last forever."

The tears were growing again, and although it was hard to hear, it was the truth.

I wasn't doing anything wrong. I was forcing myself to see if there was a light at the end of this dull tunnel I had slipped into, and I needed to lead this venture on my own.

"Thanks Greta," I replied, my voice raspy and quiet. Resting my head against her shoulder, I felt her arm come up around my shoulder, pulling me in to her comfort. "You always know what to say."

"Anytime darling," she said, "Anytime."

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This was the big chapter of the story, and after a few rough attempts at getting it right, I finally managed to pull something together that I'm content with (though I'll probably change some things around in the edits).

For those who are wondering, there are only two chapters left before the epilogue, and to keep you excited, I'll also reveal that I have a surprise that comes with the end of this novel ;)

Stay tuned for that and other news by following me on twitter (emmarosewattpad) or ask (sapphirewinx)

Also, thank you for the 250k reads... I love you all xx