Chapter 12

10:43

Biting my lip nervously, I turned back to the mirror that stood in front of me, wondering if I'd gone a little overboard as I applied a final coat of mascara. Placing the plastic tube back into my make-up bag, my eyes scanned the outfit I'd chosen. I was wearing a long sleeved black shirt that tucked into a navy and white skirt, and I'd curled my hair loosely, letting fall freely past my shoulders.

I didn't look bad, I just felt like I looked a little too put together for a lunch date.

It had taken me only a few minutes after walking through the door the night before to realize that, in the heat of the moment, I had completely forgotten about the shift I had later today at the café. I'd texted him immediately, apologizing profusely while telling him that there was no way I would be able miss another one of my usual shifts this week, but it didn't seem to bother him. It somewhat surprised me that he just simply asked if I was free in the afternoon instead, and since I didn't start until 3:00, I didn't hesitate in saying yes.

And now, knowing that he'd be here in less than fifteen minutes, my nerves were starting to act up again.

"Well, well, don't you look fancy," I heard Emily say teasingly as I looked over my shoulder to find her leaning against my bedroom door, a smirk ever so present on her face.

"You don't think it's too much?" I asked indecisively, running my fingers through my hair.

"He's taking you out for lunch right?" she asked. I nodded. "Then no. It's a first date; you can dress up a bit if you want to."

"Sorry," I apologized sheepishly, flattening out my skirt, giving my antsy hands something to do. "I'm just nervous," I continued, taking a seat on the edge of my bed.

"No need to apologize," Emily said shaking her head, taking a seat beside me. "And why are you nervous, its just Ryan."

I wound my hands together, ducking my head as I stared down at my lap. "Because its Ryan," I tried to explain. "I mean, I haven't been on a real date in a long time, and having Abbie, it makes it hard to date. I don't know, I just, I'm really starting to like him and I don't want anything to go wrong."

I blushed as the words left my lips, only looking up when I felt Emily inch closer and wrap one of her arms around my shoulders in support. "Sometimes things go wrong, but that's just what makes the relationship real," she voiced honestly. "And I wouldn't worry too much about the date; you guys get along great, and I'd be surprised if you didn't come home with a smile on your face."

My lips tugged up into a smile. "Aren't I supposed to be the older sister?" I asked jokingly, lightening the mood, "You know, giving you advice on relationships and everything, not the other way around."

Emily laughed. "If we were just talking about life, I'd definitely say you know more," she said, "But when it comes to relationships, you and I both know that I've had my fair share of ups and downs."

I laughed lightly along with her, realizing that what she was saying was true. I had never been in a serious relationship. There was one guy that I went on a few dates with in high school, but it'd only last a few weeks at most before we'd drifted apart, and besides the one night stand that led to Abbie being born, I'd only been on a handful of dates since then.

Looking back on it though, I wouldn't change the way my life had gone, because if I did, I might not have ended up where I am; nervously awaiting for Ryan to pick me up for our first date.

"So," she started, raising an eyebrow questioningly as a smile appeared on her face, "Do you know where he's taking you?"

I shook my head as I smiled, shyly playing with the end of my skirt. "He didn't say," I replied, "But thank you so much for agreeing to watch Abbie. I know I kind of sprung it on you."

"Don't worry about it," she shrugged off, "I told you I'm fine with watching her while you're working, so what's a few more hours."

I released a breath, relaxing slightly at how accepting and calm she seemed about it. "Still, thanks."

"No problem," she smiled as the sound of tiny footsteps grew louder and louder. "Speaking of the little princess."

Abbie appeared seconds later, smiling widely as she entered my bedroom and made her way happily towards the two of us. "Momma, momma!" she cheered excitedly, dangling something in her right hand.

"What do you have there sweetie?" I asked, looking at her hand curiously as she reached up and placed both hands on my lap.

"It's a bracelet I made with Gweta," she explained, looking up at me with a wide grin. At the mention of Greta's name, I made a mental note to call her soon, as it'd been about two weeks since we'd last spoken. "You should wear it so Ryan thinks you look pwetty."

Looking at the bracelet she was handing to me, I somewhat recognized the brightly coloured beads and strings from one of the kits I'd bought her a while ago as a gift, and although it wasn't really something meant to wear, the elated look on Abbie's face was impossible to say no to.

Sliding off the small silver bangles I'd put on minutes before, I stretched out the colourful bracelet slightly, rolling it up over my hand to let it rest on my wrist. "Thanks darling," I smiled. It didn't matter that it wasn't the nicest piece of jewelry I owned or that it didn't match my outfit. My daughter had made me the bracelet, and honestly, the smile on her face was enough to make my heart clench with copious amounts of love.

If it was possible, her grin grew as she pushed herself up onto the bed, wiggling herself between Emily and I. "You're welcome," she replied happily, twisting the beads on my bracelet.

"Hey sweetie," I started softly, waiting to continue until she looked up at me, her eyes doe-eyed and curious. "Are you okay with me going out with Ryan, you know, on a date?"

I held my breath as I waited for her to reply, knowing that if she really wasn't okay with it, no matter how young she was, I knew I wouldn't go through with it.

She came first, and she always would.

I was able to relax, as it didn't take her long to nod, her unruly blonde hair bobbing up and down. "It's okay momma," she beamed. "I like Ryan, and he makes you happy, and Aunty Emily said that if you guys kiss more maybe you guys will get married."

The word marriage caused an unfamiliar and uneasy feeling to come alive in the pit of my stomach; this was a first date for Pete's sake. Marriage wasn't anywhere in the near future.

I raised my head to look at Emily, who had a small smirk on her face as she looked at me with amusement, shrugging her shoulders in a dismissing manner. "Aunty Emily told you that, huh?" I asked, looking between Abbie and Emily.

"Mhm," Abbie nodded, smiling up at me innocently. "And I think you and Ryan should kiss more 'cause you smile more around him."

Her words made my heart beat a tad faster, and although I knew she partially had no idea what she was talking about, I also knew that maybe I should give her a bit more credit for her observation skills.

I laughed lightly, pulling her closer to me in a side hug that, at the moment, was just what I needed.

The moment didn't last that long however, as the sound of the doorbell ringing snapped my nerves right back into place.

"Speaking of Ryan," Emily trailed delightedly, pulling Abbie up onto her lap, "Are you going to get that, or should I?"

I took in a deep breath, releasing it slowly before standing up, smoothing out my outfit. "I'm going," I said, turning to her as I bit my lip nervously. "Are you sure I look okay?"

She chuckled. "You look great Zoe," she replied encouragingly, "Now go have fun."

Taking the stairs a little quicker than usual, I paused as I reached the door, taking a final breath to try and calm my nerves before turning the doorknob. Opening the door, I saw Ryan waiting patiently on the front steps as a gentle breeze made its way past me and into the house. He was decked out in a pair of dark jeans and a grey button down short sleeve while his hair was slightly messier than usual – as though he'd been running his fingers through it constantly.

A subtle blush covered my cheeks as I drew my eyes away from his body, only to realize that his eyes were looking over my outfit in approval. "Hey," I greeted shyly, watching Ryan's eyes snap up to my face, a sheepish smile on his face.

"Hey," he replied, bringing his hands out from behind his back to reveal a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

I hadn't even noticed he'd been hiding something, so I was sure that my face held the look of surprise as I pulled the bouquet into my chest. It was as if, with just one whiff of the fresh flowers in my hand, all the nerves slowly seeped from my body. "You bought me flowers?" I asked softly, admiring the sunflowers and lilies before looking up at him through my eyelashes.

He shrugged his shoulders as he stepped into the entryway. "I saw them on the way over here. I thought you'd like them."

"Well thank you, that's really sweet," I said as I touched the pedals of one of the sunflowers, "I'm just going to find a vase for these quickly and then we can head out."

"There's no rush," he smiled, digging his hands into his pockets.

I nodded heading into the kitchen in search of a vase, but came up short after flipping through a few cupboards, deciding that a large water jug would have to do. Turning the water tap off, I set the jug on the counter and placed the flowers inside. Smiling at the display, I turned around to head back out to the entryway to meet Ryan, only to be surprised to see him resting contently at the entrance to the kitchen. "Oh sorry," I said, "I didn't hear you follow me in here."

"It's fine," he dismissed. Standing up straight, he nodded back towards the entryway, "You ready to go?"

I nodded, anxious but excited to see what this afternoon had in store.

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"So, are you going to tell me where we're headed?"

We'd been driving through town for almost twenty minutes, having settled into a comfortable silence as the songs from the radio filled our ears, and although I'd pestered him as he'd pulled out of my driveway, he had yet to tell me anything about this date other than we were headed for lunch.

He flicked his eyes towards me for a second, turning the volume of the radio down before focusing his sights back onto the road. "I've told you already," he grinned broadly, "We're headed to lunch."

I rolled my eyes. "Then please tell me we're almost there."

"Why? Getting a little impatient?" Ryan asked amusingly. In response I said nothing, shrugging my shoulders as I looked out the passenger's window to try and settle the blush that crept up my neck. Seconds later I felt a hand fall on top of mine, squeezing gently before retracting itself back to the steering wheel. I tore my gaze away from the road to see that his grin had transformed into a small, reassuring smile. "Don't worry, we're only a few blocks away."

The song on the radio didn't even have time to finish and Ryan was already pulling his car into an underground parking garage. Finding a free space deemed itself a difficult task for a Saturday afternoon, but once Ryan spotted one, he pulled in quickly, cutting the engine before climbing out of the car.

I made a move to follow him, pausing for only a second to pick up my purse that I'd grabbed on my way out the door. As I went to open the door, it flew open without my help, leaving Ryan standing there with an eyebrow raised as he offered me a hand. "Are you going to get out, or are you going to sit in the car all afternoon?" he asked jokingly, grinning as I rolled my eyes at him and placed my hand in his.

"So, no sunglasses today?" I asked curiously looking up at him as he led us through the busy LA streets.

I caught a few people glance our way as he led me down a fairly vacant side street. "I was wondering when you'd finally realize," he replied, squeezing my hand.

"Aren't you worried about getting noticed?"

He shrugged. "It's crossed my mind," he replied, his lips twitching upwards, "But I'm not embarrassed to be seen with you, so I thought I'd give being me a shot."

A warm feeling coursed through my veins, but before I could reply he stopped, bringing my attention to the quaint restaurant we were standing in front of.

"By the way," he started, pulling me back slightly as I bumped into his chest. He ducked his head so that his breath blew warm against my ear. "You look beautiful," he continued, whispering in my ear before nudging me forward and into the restaurant.

As the door closed behind us and I was greeted with the delicious aromas within the restaurant, I knew that my cheeks were flushing pink at his compliment. Although the hostess seemed a little stunned to see Ryan, she happily led us to a secluded booth near the back of the restaurant, handing us our menus before returning to the front to greet other guests.

"So, how did you find this place?" I asked, glancing across the table at him as I flipped open my menu.

My eyes caught the way his shoulders stiffened and he kept his gaze solely focused on his menu as he replied – as though he wanted to hide the colour that dusted the apples of his cheeks. "I found it online," he coughed out, making it blatantly obvious that he was lying.

"Okay," I drawled, watching him relax and shoot me a smile as he realized I wasn't going to push him for the truth.

I hadn't even finished reading over the whole menu before the waitress came over and took our drink orders, giving us only a few minutes to decide on our orders before she returned with our drinks. My eyes dragged over everything once more, and with the variety of options that the restaurant offered, it was hard for me to decide. However, when the waitress finished scribbling down Ryan's order and turned to me, I went with the classic chicken wrap and garden salad.

As I reached forward to bring my glass of water closer to me, Ryan's hand moved across the table, stopping as he fiddled with the beads on the bracelet Abbie had given me. "Cute bracelet," he said cheekily, "Though it's a bit brighter than the rest of your outfit."

I laughed, taking a sip of my drink before replying. "Abbie gave it to me this morning. She said that if I wore it, it'd make me prettier."

"Well she certainly was onto something," he grinned, letting go of the bracelet as he turned my hand over, delicately intertwining his fingers with mine. "Did she make it at daycare?"

I shook my head, trying not to get distracted by the patterns he was drawing on the outside of my thumb. "I bought her a bracelet making kit for her birthday, so I guess her and Greta got around to using it a few times before we moved down here," I explained.

"Who's Greta?"

I hesitated for a second, knowing that,up until now, I'd more or less avoided saying too much about my family. "She's the one who took care of Emily and I growing up," I started. "My parents got really busy with work when I was around ten years old, so Greta, who was just our housekeeper up until then, got more involved in our lives. She'd make us breakfast, take us out to play, and put us to bed at night."

"And what, your parents weren't around?"

I struggled to find the right words to say. Never, even to my closest friends in high school, had I fully disclosed everything about my home life, but for some reason, it felt completely right to come clean to him.

"They were when I was younger," I trailed, seeing a curious expression on Ryan's face, "But when their company started to get bigger they were around less. They spent a lot of time at events with their clients and colleagues, and a lot of the time they were away on business trips, but they still expected Emily and I to be perfect."

"So what happen they found out-"

"About Abbie?" I finished, raising an eyebrow as I saw him grasping for what to say. He nodded carefully. "It's okay," I shrugged, "Their reaction at first was pretty normal; they were shocked that I'd been so careless, but they got a lot madder when I told them I wanted to keep her. I'd considered abortion and adoption when I found out, but I couldn't go through with either. When I told them that, it more or less felt as though they just cut me out of their lives."

"They gave me money when Abbie was born so I could support her and still get an education, but they never really wanted to see her. I think Abbie's only properly met them about ten times since she was born, and that's usually just to drop off birthday or Christmas presents."

"So Abbie doesn't even know her own grandparents?" he asked with a frown.

I shook my head sadly. "They never wanted to get to know her," I said. "I think they felt like I embarrassed them by becoming a single mother so young."

"That's nothing to be embarrassed of," Ryan said reassuringly, squeezing my hand gently. "Abbie's a gorgeous little girl, and she's lucky to have you as a mom."

"Thanks," I breathed out a bit quieter, feeling the butterflies come alive in my stomach.

For the first time I'd finally told someone besides my family about my life and, despite my fears, they hadn't run in the other direction. Ryan had stayed, and he genuinely seemed to understand. I wanted to say so much more; but I couldn't find the words. Before I could think of anything though, the waitress arrived with our food.

The conversation seemed to take a less serious turn as we started eating. We talked about Abbie a bit more, my job, what we both liked to do in our spare time, and he explained a bit more about what his schedule was over the next couple of weeks. He told me that he had a few photo-shoots and interviews, as well as a bunch of meetings for a fundraising event he had gotten involved with. There wasn't a single awkward silence.. Talking with him felt like second nature to me, and while that should of scared me, considering I'd only known him for a short amount of time, it didn't.

After our meals were finished, he surprised me by ordering a slice of strawberry cheesecake for the two of us to share.

I grinned to myself as the waitress returned with the dessert, not giving me a second glance as she smiled widely at Ryan and told him not to hesitate to call her back to the table if he had any problems. She was clearly trying to get noticed by a celebrity, and when I took a look around us, I realized that quite a few other girls were also eyeing Ryan from their seats.

"What?" Ryan asked curiously, handing me a clean fork as he moved the cheesecake to the middle of the table.

Taking a small piece off the end, I grinned. "Nothing," I shrugged with amusement, "I was just wondering if you're aware of all the attention you seem to be getting?"

His eyes shifted as he took a bite of cheesecake, taking in the tables around us. There was a group of girls near the back of the restaurant that were whispering and kept glancing this way, as well as several other guests surrounding us that were hoping to catch Ryan's attention.

"What jealous?" he asked, turning back to me with an eyebrow raised.

I shook my head. "I just find it funny that even when you're out like a normal person, people still find you interesting."

"What? And you don't?" he teased.

"Well, you've managed to keep my attention this long," I returned, my lips twitching upwards.

"And I tend to keep it a little while longer," he smiled, making my heart beat a little faster as I returned his smile.

It didn't take long for our slice of cheesecake to disappear, and with that, our time at the restaurant dwindled down. When the check came I told Ryan that I didn't mind splitting the bill. Hushing up my protests, Ryan paid for the food before ushering me out of the restaurant.

"So, when do you need to be at work?" Ryan asked as we stepped back out onto the streets.

"What time is it?"

"Half past twelve."

"I work at three, so I have a good two hours before I need to be home, why?"

"Do you want to explore a little bit?" he asked, nodding down the road.

I saw the hopefulness in his eyes as he waited for me to respond. "Let's do it," I smiled, taking his hand in mine.

It didn't take long to realize that this part of town seemed fairly familiar to Ryan as he took a few turns on impulse, leading us to the entrance of a rather large family park.

We'd spent a lot of time just talking as we strolled around the park, and in my mind, the day had been absolutely perfect so far. I was kicking myself for being so nervous about it, because as the two of us took a seat under a tree, my head falling comfortably down onto his shoulder, I felt content.

The time seemed to get away from us as we sat watching the people who passed us by, and we ended up having to run part of the way to the garage where the car was parked.

"Thanks for lunch," I said, turning to smile at him as he pulled up in front of my house a while later, "I had fun."

"Me too," he agreed.

And that's when the air turned awkward for the first time that afternoon.

I wasn't brave enough to make a move, and from where I was sitting, watching Ryan grasp the steering wheel tightly, I felt a hint of sorrow knowing that maybe, he wasn't either.

"I guess I'll see you later," I offered.

"Yeah, later," he nodded nervously.

Sighing, I turned and slipped out of the car, making my way up the driveway. I was second guessing myself, I knew, wondering if this date had actually not been as great as I thought it'd been.

"Wait," I heard Ryan say loudly.

I froze for only a moment before I turned to see him walking around the front of his car and right towards me. In seconds he was standing right in front of me.

"I forgot something."

I felt his fingers land softly on the skin of my wrist and slowly roam up my arm, leaving goose bumps as they went. When his hand reached just below my chin, it stopped, hovering there as I let loose the breath I'd been holding. "What?" I asked quietly, looking him in the eyes as I waited for his reply.

His eyes bore into mine for what felt like forever, but was realistically only a second or two. My breathing sped up as he came closer; too close.

Without another word his lips slanted on top of mine and, embarrassingly enough, a soft moan escaped my lips at the feel of them. When he didn't pull away immediately I felt myself responding as though it was second nature, and in the moment, it felt like it was.

His lips were soft and slow at first, but as I ran my hand over his shirt slowly, reaching up to cup his cheek, the pace quickened and I could feel both my heart and his beating uncontrollably. His tongue darted out quickly, parting my lips for one sweet second before he pulled back altogether, eyes closed and breathing hard.

"That," he said, replying to my earlier question, pecking my lips once more before resting his head on mine.

Opening my eyes slowly, a grin formed on my face. "Oh, that." I said, biting my lip.

Ryan chuckled, his breath fanning my face. "Yeah," he said slowly, his eyes darting between my eyes and my lips as he brought his hand up to sweep a piece of stray hair behind my ear. "So, do you work tomorrow?"

I nodded. "In the morning."

"How about a dinner date this time then?" he asked. "You and Abbie can come over and we can all watch a movie together."

The fact that his offer included Abbie made me like him even more, if that was even possible in that instant. "I think we'd both really like that."

"Great," he grinned, pausing for a second as he played with a few strands of my hair. "Are you sure you don't need a ride to work?"

I shook my head. "I'm good," I replied, reaching up on my tiptoes to plant one final kiss on his lips before stepping back from his hold. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow," he replied, standing close to still in my driveway until I reached my door. Turning back to smile at him, I headed inside and closed the door behind me.

Knowing that I didn't have much time before my shift started at the café, I wasn't left with time to walk around with a dopey smile as I rushed upstairs, hoping that I didn't run into Emily before I could change and leave again.

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"Oh come on, that's it?" Colette asked much later that evening as we sat on the couch in my living room, whining as I finished telling both her and Emily about my date, "There has to be more," she persisted.

I laughed at her reaction, shaking my head.

When I'd arrived at work earlier, Colette had mercilessly tried to pester me for details about my date, but knowing that she'd already been invited over for a girls night, I refused, making her wait patiently until now to hear the story.

"Sorry, nothing more," I replied, "Why, what were you expecting?"

"I don't know," she huffed, "Maybe an extravagant helicopter ride around the city or a hot make-out session in the back seat of the limo." At that, both Emily and I laughed. "What? It could've happened."

"Who exactly did you think I was going out with... the king of England?" I asked jokingly.

"No, you were going out with Ryan Adams," Emily pointed out.

"So?"

"So... he's one of the most sought after celebrities right now," Emily continued. "He no doubt would've had enough money to do something over the top, so it just seems a bit strange to us that he did what any other guy would've done for a first date."

"He's just a normal guy," I said, ducking my head as I picked at the bottom of my pyjama shirt.

"To you, yes, but to us, sometimes we need that extra reminder," Colette said, smiling as I looked back up at the two of them.

"But, since he's just a normal guy," Emily started teasingly, "You wouldn't mind telling us more about that kiss, right?"

My cheeks burned red at the mention of the kiss as every moment came rushing back to me. "It was good," I offered shyly.

"Oh come on," they both fussed.

"What do you want me to say?" I asked incredulously. "You want me to say that I felt like I was floating on clouds when he kissed me, or that fireworks were going off in every corner of my mind?"

"Yes," they agreed as I realized what I'd just said.

I saw their eyes sparkling with interest, but to me, it just didn't feel right to share anymore. Those moments were between Ryan and I, and that, I decided, was where they were to be kept. Blushing profusely, I stood up from the couch, suggesting they choose a movie to put on as I headed into the kitchen to calm myself.

Taking a few deep breaths, I decided to throw a bag of popcorn into the microwave, hoping that by the time it was done I'd be able to re-join my friends without any more questions.

Just as the timer on the microwave was ticking down towards zero, my phone, which I'd left on the counter, beeped and I saw it was a message from Ryan.

I'll see you tomorrow, Goodnight xx

I smiled as my eyes focused on the two x's at the tail end of the text. As I pressed send on a short goodnight message of my own, the timer on the popcorn went off.

Pouring the steaming kernels into a bowl, I headed back into the living room hoping for a quiet and relaxing night. But really, what were the odds of that?

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Finally finished this monstrosity! Sorry it took me three weeks to upload, but I just couldn't find the motivation for the bulk of this chapter.

Now - time for two announcements. First, I just got hired for a job for the last few weeks of the summer. I'll be working 10 hour days, 6 days a week, so basically what I'm trying to say, is weekly uploads are probably going to be stopping. Secondly, after countless tries to find the perfect cover, most of you can see that I've switched back to the original one, which I guess just fits the story the most. (The two in the banner however are made by offline- and vinyl-, and are beautiful even though they aren't actually on the cover)

Remember guys, to vote and leave a comment below if you enjoyed this, as this story is up for the Wattys, and it can use all the love and support it can get xx