Finral had taken me and Asta to a mixer, sitting in front of me was Noelle's sister, Nebra Silva. Speaking of Noelle, she was working as a maid here but I believe she was doing it to spy on us........but why?

Blue: [Sighs] Let's get this over with

Nebra: S-So, what do you want to talk about?

Blue: I don't know

Nebra: R-Right, uhhh why did you agree to come here? I didn't expect you to come here.

Blue: I can say the same as you. I agreed so that Finral wouldn't keep bothering me

Nebra: Okay....I wanted to see what life was like outside of the noble circle.

Blue: That is.......strange. You are someone who looks down on peasants

Nebra: I do, and I didn't have any hope that I would enjoy this lifestyle....but something about it hits different to a nobles life. It's more.....expressive.

Noelle: Wait, Nebra likes life out of the Royal Capital? I-I didn't know that. What does Solid and Nozel think about it?

Blue:........

Nebra: So, why do you wear a mask? And why is there a bandage across your eye?

Blue:.....You shouldn't worry about that, just know that I know what Betrayal is like. Noelle knows as well.

Nebra: [Flinches] W-What do you mean?

Blue: Oh you know what I mean, but let's move on from that. You want to know more about me, I can tell you that I trust.....no one.

Nebra: No one?

Blue: No one.....I may fight alongside the Black Bulls and others but I do not trust any of them with my life.

Nebra: Not even your family?

Blue:.....No

Noelle: Blue.....doesn't trust us? Not even me? He always gives me advice in the moments I need it......I'm also wondering on who his family was.

Nebra: Okay....He really cares about no one, does he even enjoy his own life? Doesn't seem like it, what happened to him? What caused him to be like this? He is so.....broken.....is this how Noelle feels with us?

Blue: Finral said this was meant to be fun.....but I haven't seen anything fun yet. Not that I know what fun is like

Nebra: Blue......

Blue: You call me by my name?

Nebra: I heard that you don't like to be called by your title, so I thought that calling you by your name is better

Blue:.....Fair enough

Nebra: I want to ask you something

Blue: What is it?

Nebra: Do you think.....that maybe I should talk to Noelle more?

Noelle: Wait......what?

Blue: Why do you even hate her?

Nebra:.....She killed our mother....

Blue: That doesn't sound like Noelle

Nebra: I-It was her birth......

Blue:...............

It's because of you, you idiot! If she didn't give birth to you! Then she would still be here! Cooking my food! And working for me!

............

I didn't know this........I thought that no one would ever understand me so I decided to never trust anyone....in fear of getting hurt again......but maybe.......Noelle is like me........

Nebra: Blue?

Blue:......You should talk to her more, she doesn't trust you and trust me when I say....you don't want that. You don't want her to be like that...

Nebra: Are you sure?

Blue: Unlike myself, it's not her fault

Nebra: Right, I might...wait! What do you mean unlike yourself?

I ignore Nebra's question and stand up from my chair, Asta and Finral noticed and looked over at me as I walk towards the entrance to the building.

Finral: Blue where are you going?

Blue: Back at the base, I've done what you want and I had enough.

Rebecca: Is he okay Asta?

Asta: Huh? Well it's hard to say with Blue since I'm pretty sure he hasn't smiled yet but he is a good person. He is just.....confusing

Rebecca: I see, I'm sorry about that Nebra

Nebra: N-No no, it's fine. I....enjoyed our talk

Noelle: Blue....you just convinced my sister to talk to me....but I want to know what you mean? Did....your mother die too because of you? Please Blue, I want to know. I want you to talk to me more. I want to see you happy. I didn't think I would be friends with you out of all people, let alone the other Black Bulls. But....I want to know more about you.

______________________

I left the town and went back to the base, like I said, I've done what I needed to do. But I can't help but think about what Nebra said about Noelle......

She got her mother killed due to her birth.....

Like me.

Blue: That's....strange

I believe it isn't her fault, I think it was just a natural thing.....or maybe it wasn't because of Noelle's birth.

My mother died because I am not normal, I'm some sort of curse upon this world.

Velvet: Aww don't say that Blue, I don't think you're a curse

Blue: You're just saying that, you don't know anything

Velvet: Then why don't you tell me about yourself unlike that girl? You barely told her anything

Blue: Because no one needs to know who I am or who I was

Velvet: Aww come on, that's boring of you!

Blue: Do I care?

Constance: Who are you talking to?

I look to my side and saw that Constance was standing near some trees, I was in the forest that surrounds the Black Bull base.

Blue: To myself

Constance: About what?

Blue: Nothing

Constance: Well it can't be nothing when you're talking to yourself

Blue: Trust me, it's nothing

Constance: How can I trust you when you don't even trust me?

Blue: I-

Constance: I know you don't trust anyone Blue but how long are you going to live your life like this? You keep to yourself when you really need to open up more, it would help you

Blue: No one.....no one can help me, I'm already broken

Constance: I don't believe that, I know that somewhere inside of that head of yours is the real Blue Light. The Blue that I taught when he was just a boy still learning to control his magic. I helped you learn more spells and control some of that transformation of yours....but you have never thanked me once before have you?

Blue:....Do I need to?

Constance: And that's my problem with you Blue! You're so emotionless that it's bizarre you were even like this when I first met you!

Blue: Why is it bizarre? That's just who I am

Constance: Blue you were nine! You were a child! You're still a child! No one in your age group should be like this! Children are meant to be full of innocence, they smile and laugh and are mostly happy. But you Blue.....you've never done any of those things have you?

Blue:..........

Constance: Do you even know what a smile is?

Blue: Isn't that when the ends of my mouth point upwards?

Constance:....Y-Yes....yes that's right Blue, can you do that for me?

Blue:......I....I-I can't

Constance: You can't or you don't want to.....

Blue:....I don't know how to

Constance: And why do you not know how to? Did your parents never teach you? Or is there more to the story?

Blue:....You shouldn't worry Constance, you may have been my mentor....but you're not a friend.

Constance:........I see how it is Blue, no matter how you see me, I will always love you. You have been a great pupil of mine with an amazing magic attribute. I'll see you later

Constance walks away and I stand there for a moment until Velvet reminded me that I should go to the base.

________________

[A Few Days Later]

Death......death is what someone fears right?

That's all I have heard from people, but have they experienced it?

No.

While I haven't, I don't hate the idea.

If I was killed....I would accept it.

I've been waiting for death for a long time but it never comes, maybe it's because part of me fights back and lives another day.

Do I want to die? Maybe, I do......this world is not a kind one....I know from experience.

I was left to my thoughts but then I heard a noise, I went down to the lobby and found the others sleeping here after another pointless party. Noelle was in her room and Asta went  to visit that Rebecca girl from before.

Gauche went as well since his sister stays at the local church in that town.

The noise I heard woke up Noelle as she comes down while rubbing her eyes.

Noelle: W-What's that noise?

Blue: I don't know

I look towards Yami and found a magic item in his pocket, it was a communication device. I opened it and a smaller transmitted version of that Sekke guy appeared.

Sekke: I-It's you!

Noelle: Bah-Ha?

Sekke: It's Sekke!

Blue: What do you want?

Sekke: U-Umm well, your friend Asta needs help. Something about the Eye of the Midnight Sun-

Blue: Where is he?

Sekke tells me that it was in the same town that Asta went, I close the item and write down a note that I place on Finral's face. It said to come to the same place with Yami later on, anything involving the Eye needs a Captain.

I'm positive that there are people like Blackwell who might be stronger. As I get ready to leave, Noelle grabs my sleeve.

Blue: What is it?

Noelle: C-Can I come?

Noelle is like me........

She got her mother killed due to her birth.....

Like me.

Blue: Fine

Noelle: Also you might want this

I look at Noelle who hands me something that I have been waiting for a while now.

Blue:.....Thank you

Noelle: N-No problem

I put my mask on and leave the base with Noelle, we travel with my shadows since it's faster. Noelle was in my arms and her face was red, while travelling, I wondered if Constance wanted that thank you.

I can say it, I just don't see the point in it....like most things.

We reached the town and were confused on why it was snowing, I saw that Rebecca was outside and approached her.

Rebecca: Blue?

Blue: Where is Asta?

Rebecca: He went into a cave in that direction with his black bull friend and Sister Theresa.

Blue: The old lady?

Rebecca: Yes, my siblings along with all other kids have been kidnapped.

Blue: I see, Noelle stay here

Noelle: A-Are you sure?

Blue: I need you here just in case. I'll be back with everyone

I travel towards this cave and saw a boy in a Black Bull robe, I knew it was Asta's and the boy was most likely one of Rebecca's siblings. I use my shadows to carry him to Rebecca without having to travel back and then I focus my attention to the cave.