I don't know how long I sat there.. Jesus..!! I am the one..??? I am the one who's responsible for this??? Ya its me..! ofcoarse its me... I clearly remember, it was my plan to meet up.. fuck.!! This is why Sri is so cold to me..?? but why is she not angry?? Why didn't she tell me all these..!! why did she keep quiet all these months??? Sambit... does Sambit know about this too..?? no no.. cause if he knew he would have thrashed me... yes I deserve it.. I am to be blamed for everything... but what do I do now?? What do I do to compensate what Sri lost..!!! how..?? My world had stopped..!! I didn't have the power to wipe away my own tears.. then how would I wipe away her tears..!!!

"Bagchi.." I trance broke as I felt the tap... Sambit..!! I gulped anticipating some insults.. but... "I am stuck up here... can you to this address.. and talk to him??" he gave me a visiting card... some... Rahul Sanyal... advocate. What?? Advocate.?? I looked at him in confusion. "umm... Sri expected her mom would survive, so in order to continue the treatment she needed money... thus we went to Mr.Sanyal, who would help her in liquefying a few of her properties. The house they had had already been mortgaged, last year.." he paused.. "last evening we went to him only, so that the procedures could run faster..!!" I kept looking at him... shame on me..!!! It was my duty to be Sri's side.. but I?? And I was doubting Sri..??

"Bagchi"..he nudged me again.. "please discuss with him regarding how to save money, and where to invest so that the girl's future is secured.." "Sambit.. you love Sri this much..???" I don't know, but these words just slipped out of my mouth... I immediately repented after uttering the words.. ofcourse he loved her... and loved her much more than me..!! no no.. what am I saying.. I don't love her.. I just have sympathies for her.. for she is physically disabled.. and just now lost her mother..!!

"I love her a brotherly love..." he finally spoke.. and I sighed in relief..!! "Ten years back I lost my sister.. she had committed suicide unable to accept her artificial hand...I.. I ... I agree initially I had liking for Sri... but when I came to know to about her leg..." Sambit broke down... he had told me he had a sister who expired.. but this...!!!

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It was around 10 in the morning.. when the body was finally discharged.. and was permitted for the cremation.. Sri herself fed fire to her mother... I turned back... I could not see Sri like this.. in fact the whole scenario was too painful to watch..!! one of her uncles took her with him, after everything for over... Doctor uncle had suggested them to take her along with them for a few days...

I left for the advocate's chamber... still unable to absorb the shock... my phone buzzed... "hello ma..." "you didn't call me babu this morning.." her anxious voice rang into my ears... "ma my friend's mother expired at dawn today.. so.." I tried explaining... she huffed... "poor kid..".. "Ma...".. "Ya babu...".. "I am missing you ma.. can I just come to you..." I almost broke... yes.. only ma could bring me some peace... and I only surely crash in our house after I meet the advocate... "Uji.. what's wrong??? You are seeking permission to come to your own house..??" and that was it.. I broke down completely... "all because of me ma.. she lost everything because of.. her mother.. her father.. herself.. everyone... I cant undo the things... what can I do so that she forgives me..." I kept on sobbing... "come to home right now.." she ordered... I don't know what happened to me..and how did this come up... "Ma.. can I marry her..??? she needs a mother.. please.."

to be continued...