Chapter 29

I knew there was something about her.

Give her a room and she'll want the whole house.

Ilusyonada.

"Alright," I replied, my face still sporting the smile that I'd been wearing all day. Tumingin ako sa gilid ko. They understood what I meant. Quickly, they guided Rosie to a private place. Kakausapin ko siya, pero mamaya na. I had other things that I needed to do first.

I continued talking to the public. Nang mapatingin ako sa gawi ni Archibald, nakita ko na ganoon din ang ginagawa niya. He looked normal. Hindi niya siguro nakita si Rosie kanina kasi kung nakita niya 'yon, I doubted that he'd be able to focus on the task at hand.

When I was done, I quickly excused myself. I knew that people were still watching me, so I maintained my demeanor. I asked kung saang sasakyan nakasakay si Rosie. I quickly headed that way.

I drew a deep breath bago ako pumasok sa sasakyan. I quietly took my seat. She was watching my every move. I instructed the driver to drive us somewhere away from the prying eyes.

"Ma'am..." she said in that... sad, sad tone. It's quite fascinating. How could she justify in that little head of hers that she's the victim in this situation? How could she go here and blackmail me into talking to her? How could she call me 'ma'am' like she respects me after she slept with my husband?

She's quite the walking contradiction.

I rested my head and closed my eyes while were on the road. Kahit na nakapikit ang mga mata ko ay ramdam ko na nakatingin siya sa akin. And when my phone vibrated, I opened my eyes to check on who was calling.

Speak of the devil.

He probably finally learned na kasama ko si Rosie. Hindi naman siya normally tumatawag na sa akin. I mean, there's no point, really. Lagi naman kaming magkasama kapag nasa campaign kami. And when we're home, he'd just watch me around. Even at home, I couldn't relax when he's breathing on my neck.

Nakita ko na nakatingin doon si Rosie nang hayaan ko lang na kusang matapos iyong tawag. She was looking at his name on my phone like she wanted to answer it.

Oh, right.

Hindi nga pala siya kinakausap ni Archibald.

"What do you want?" I asked her straight ahead nang huminto na iyong sasakyan. We were in some basement parking lot. It was quiet. She could say anything right now. I could say anything right now. No one's watching.

I waited for her to say something. I mean, surely she did have something to say. Afterall, she did seek me out. Naghintay siya na matapos iyong program. Pumila siya para makausap ako. She went through all the trouble to get me here.

"Ma'am..." she began.

"Cut to the chase, Rosie. Tell me why you're here."

Nakita ko na huminga siya nang malalim. I looked at her through my peripheral vision. She was wearing a loose shirt. At the very least, she probably cared about Archibald because she could've worn the tightest fitting shirt and create some rumor.

"Ma'am, alam ko po na alam niyo..."

"About what?" I asked. There was only silence on her head. Why? Couldn't she tell me how she's pregnant with the child of my husband? That she knowingly slept with a married man? Why was she acting like a wide-eyed virgin right now?

Hindi siya nakapagsalita, pero inilagay niya iyong kamay niya sa tiyan niya. I didn't think it was for her to tell me that she's married. She instinctively did that to protect that against me.

Like I was the monster.

Like I was the one who put her in this situation.

"Gusto ko lang naman pong makausap si Archie..."

Hindi ko napigilan ang tawa ko.

"Archie..." I mimicked. Gone were the days when she called him Mayor Gallego. But why was I surprised? They did way more intimate things that her calling him by his nickname.

"I am not his secretary," I told her. "If you want to talk to him, go call him. I'm sure you have his number."

"Hindi po siya sumasagot."

"Then, there's your answer," I replied.

"Ma'am—"

"Can you stop calling me that?" I asked. For some reason, her calling me that and sounding like she's the victim was rubbing me the wrong way.

"Pasensya na po. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang itatawag ko sa inyo."

"Call me by my name," I told her. "After all, you already slept with my husband. You should be comfortable enough to call me by my name."

Nakita ko na napaawang iyong labi niya.

Either she's really this innocent or she deserved an Oscar for this performance. She's really selling it with that innocent role she's playing.

"Look, Rosie, I'm gonna be straight with you," I said, looking at her so that she'd know that every word I'd say, I meant it. "You slept with Archibald? I don't care. I mean, if anything, I was offended," I continued. I knew I sounded condescending but we both knew that she's a downgrade. "You can have him."

I watched as her hands slightly trembled.

Was she scared?

Why?

I was not here to fight with her—I would never fight over a man. She can have him.

"Sorry po..." she said. I watched as the tear fell from her eyes. I did not understand this girl. It was not like he lied to her and told her that he's single. She knew from the get go that he's married. Still, she knowingly slept with him. Kaya bakit siya umiiyak ngayon?

"Don't be," I replied. "A man that can be stolen is not a man worth keeping."

Besides, if there's anything I learned in life, it's that a snake can shed its skin, but can never change its color.

"So, keep him. Have him. I don't care."

The tears fell quicker.

God.

What did she want? Did she expect me to engage in a cat fight with her over him?

"Iyong..." she said in between. "Iyong baby po..."

She held on to her skirt so tightly that it begam to crumple.

"Pangako po hindi ako manggugulo..."

I just stared at her.

"Hindi ko po sasabihin kahit kanino iyong..." she said as she tried her hardest to even her breathing. "Iyong sa tatay niya po..."

I remained silent. Times like this, silence is way scarier than words. Because in silence, they can paint the worst case scenarios in their head—their own personalized version of hell.

"Please po..."

"Why? What do you think I'll do?" I asked.

Hindi siya nagsalita.

She looked at me with those frightened eyes of hers... but even with fear, I sensed how she hated me.

"Please po, ma'am," she said. "Mananahimik po kami ng anak ko... Pangako po..."

I stared at her.

The more I stared at her, the more disrespected I felt.

This?

This was the woman he chose over me?

"You should've thought about that before you got yourself in this situation, Rosie," I said as I straightened my seat. She was still looking at me. I could see her at the mirror. I could see how quickly the tears were falling. I could see the fear and despair on her face.

"Ma'am—"

"No, you listen to me now," I said because I was growing tired of listening to the same thing over and over again. I'd heard this before. Ganito rin iyong sinasabi ni Archibald sa akin. I was so over this conversation.

"Once I'm certain that my husband's the father of that child—"

"Siya po ang tatay," she quickly replied.

"You can't blame me if I don't trust your words," I told her. "You opened your legs for a married man. Who knows who else you opened them for?"

Her face fell.

I wanted to feel bad for her, but she put herself in this situation. She needed to start taking some accountability. Bagay silang dalawa.

"Hindi po ako ganon," she said while she was staring at her lap and while tears were continuously pouring. Can't this girl do anything but cry? Sa ganyan din ba niya nakuha ang asawa ko? Sa pag-iyak at pagpapaawa?

"I don't know that," I said. "And frankly, I'm not interested to know at all," I continued. "If there's nothing more—"

"Ganon na lang po ba? Ano ang gusto niyong mangyari? Na mawala na lang ang anak ko?" she asked. Her tone was different. Suddenly, she felt like a different person. Was this the real her all along? Was the mask finally lifted now that she realized that she couldn't get me to do what she wanted with some tears?

I looked straight into her eyes.

"Ganoon lang po ba kadali sa inyo 'yon? Na parang hindi tao iyong anak ko?"

I remained silent.

I'd just be giving her what she wanted if I'd react. After all, my mind's already decided—it's been decided long before I even knew she existed.

"Ano po? Ipapapatay niyo na lang kami ng anak ko? Sa tingin niyo po ba walang magtataka?"

"Your family's dead, Rosie. Who will look for you?" I said before I could even stop myself because sometimes... sometimes you just want to go for the jugular.

I saw the shock written all over her face.

I wanted to apologize because even I knew that that was too much.

But I meant what I said—who did she think she was?

"I'm sure it's not gonna be Archibald. You said it yourself—he's not answering your calls," I said. "So, why are you fighting for this baby? Clearly, it's only you who wants it."

Tears.

Hindi nauubusan ng luha ang isang 'to.

"Tama nga si Archie..." she said as she desperately tried to wipe the unending tears. "Wala kang puso," she continued before she opened the door and got out of the car.

It was nothing new.

I'd heard it before.

But to know that he talked about me with her?

I wanted her gone.

* * *

Hindi ako umuwi.

I did not want to see Archibald because unlike all the other nights, I did not have the restraint to stop myself from arguing with him.

I did not want to go to a hotel because I did not want to be left alone with my thoughts.

I did not have the time to go to Tagaytay.

I most certainly did not want to go to my family's house.

"You don't have to entertain me," sabi ko kay Addie.

She shrugged. "I'm not doing anything," she replied.

We were sitting on the couch, surrounded with silence. Kanina pa ako nandito. She prepared food—or at least she tried. She just put a platter of cheese in front of me, a bottle of wine, and two glasses. But we both were not in the mood. They were still untouched.

"You hate Abby, right?" I said.

"I don't hate her," Addie replied.

"Right," I said as I reached for the wine and began to open it.

"Just that... anyone else would be way better," she said. "Like literally anyone else."

"Still hung-up on the plane?"

"Of course I am!" Addie said. "Who does that? And seriously, how can Maven sleep beside her every night? She's literally evil."

I still remember the day I learned about what Abby did. I was half scared, half fascinated. She's stop at nothing to get what she wanted. No wonder why Abuela likes her kahit hindi niya direktang sabihin.

"All that for what? A six-year term? Is it really worth losing your humanity for a position in the government?" she asked while she was looking at me like she knew what I was planning on doing. Or maybe she did. It's Addie after all.

And in our world, there's no secret—only delayed truth. Kaya hindi ako naniniwala na mananatiling sikreto iyong kay Rosie. Because one day, someone will find out. One day, someone will use that against us.

After all, blackmail has always been the name of the game.

"Maybe," I said. "That six-year position comes with a lot of benefits," I continued.

"Worth taking people's lives?"

I took a small sip. "A lot of people died for a lot less."

"And do you seriously want to be like those people?" she asked, asking me directly.

"What?"

"Come on," she said. "I know why you went here."

Sumandal ako. Tahimik na hawak ko iyong baso.

"I know this has been your dream for as long as you can remember," she said. "And I know that you'll do anything to get what you want... but... think about it, Nadia. Once you do that, there's no going back. It's not like... it's not like you can just apologize and take it back."

I remained silent.

I... didn't know what to say.

"I know you want to be like Abuela... I know you want to be like her—powerful and all the things you admire about her. But look at her... does she look happy? Is that really who you want to be like—always hungry for more; never quite contented?"

Addie looked at me and smiled.

"You're not like them, Nadia. And thank God for that," she said before she left me alone with my thoughts. 

**

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