"Darling, I'm so happy you could make it." My mother, Jamie Holt, is a busy lady. She works hard as an OBGYN, goes to Pilates, and shops in the evening in her free time. 

And when she's really free. I mean, really really free with nothing left to do - she makes time to go out to eat with her family.

Dad, of course, makes it when he can, which isn't often either due to him being a Cardiovascular surgeon. I give this meeting 30 minutes max before he's called away on his phone.

I settle into my seat on the patio of this fancy restaurant and slide on my sunglasses to hide my tired eyes. Maybe I shouldn't have stayed up so late last night watching horror movies.

Speaking of, we're missing a very specific part of the puzzle.

"When's Hayden getting here?" I ask, unfolding my napkin and putting it on my lap.

Mom sighs while Dad glances her way before bringing his water glass to his lips.

"Honey, we just thought it'd be nice to have lunch with you this time." She answered.

I squint my eyes. "You didn't even ask him? Mom, what–"

"Honey, we just feel like...Hayden is on his own journey right now and in a few months, he'll be on his own and we want to give him that space to do that." It looks like she doesn't even believe the words she's saying.

"I can't believe this..." I breathe. How could our parents do this to him? I guess they still fund his life, put a roof over his head and feed him but they're not there for him in the way he truly needs. He doesn't have their support or love and in the end, isn't that all a kid really wants anyways?

"Cameron, enough. We're having a nice lunch here, don't spoil it by bringing up things that don't matter." Dads stern voice hits me in the chest.

"How could you say that about your own son? My brother?" I mutter looking down at the table. I want to make them happy but at what cost?

I pull out my phone. "He should be here." I say out loud.

Me : Come to lunch, we're at the Vincents

🌙: I'd rather die

Me: Fine. I'm coming there then.

🌙: Fine.

"Honey, could you not text at the table? It's rude." Mom says as the waiter walks up to us.

"Hello there, my name is Philip. May I take your drink orders?" The young man asks.

I jump in. "You can take theirs. I'm heading out."

"I would've liked to see their faces." Hayden laughs. "87,"

"Yeah, they weren't impressed. But fuck it, I'd do it again. 88," I grunt.

He presses back down at the same time I do and we continue our pushups head to head.

"You know you don't have to stick up for me. 89,"

"You're my brother. If they lose you, they'll lose me. 90," I struggle on that one.

Hayden laughs. "Oh come on, you're slowing down on me. 91," He continues easily but I can feel my arms start to give out.

"I.Hate.You. 92," I push up but that took everything I got. I flop down on the concrete and roll on to my back. Hayden continues on and finally breaks one hundred before flopping and rolling on his own back.

We're outside in the backyard beside the pool. I'm thankful that we own once since I can roll right in after our workout.

"If I knew you were doing this, I wouldn't have came home." I pant.

"You would've came home either way." Hayden smiles, sitting up on his elbow. I look up until I can see him. He has a distant look on his face as he runs his hand over the speckle in the concrete.

I swallow hard. He deserves so much more love than what my parents give him. It's unfair. Just because I play by their rules, they treat me better. But if they knew that the only difference between Hayden and I is the fact that he's not afraid to say what he wants...they'd treat me the same way.

"Yeah, you're probably right." I breathe. I sit up and look at his face. "You know I'd do anything for you, right?" I ask.

He squints at me, as though he doesn't fully believe my words.

I lift out my hand and grab ahold of his neck, bringing him in until our foreheads touch. He grabs on to my arm with his hand.

"Till the end of the world, big brother." I whisper.

He closes his eyes and breathes in deeply. "Till the end of the world, baby brother."

I push off of him and stand up. "Now come on."

"Where are we going now?" He sighs.

Thankfully I'm only wearing athletic shorts which makes jumping in the pool a no brainer.

I cannonball right into the deep end and can feel the wave around me as Hayden joins in beside me.

I laugh out loud as soon as I break the surface. Splashing him right in the face was probably not the best idea since he very quickly goes after revenge.

We spent the rest of the afternoon play fighting in the pool and heading inside to cook ourselves some lunch. I live for moments like this.

Only missing one person in this equation and it'd be a perfect day.

NiceASHhole: Some of us have to earn a living

I head into the washroom, still drenched from the pool. It's the end of the night, Hayden had to leave for work and I'm missing Asher, as per usual. This house is so quiet when he's not around and my thoughts are so damn loud.

Me: I'll pay for you for the night. Come on, skip it.

NiceASHhole: Ohhh, you wanna buy me? I'll change your name to SugarDaddyCam in my phone

I laugh at that, changing out of my wet shorts and tossing them in my laundry bin.

Me: Yeah, I'll treat you so well. You don't even KNOW

NiceASHhole: Kk, be over soon

Me: Seriously?? Fuck yeah!

NiceASHhole: No, you idiot.

I roll my eyes and toss my phone on the countertop. What a fucking tease.

Suddenly, my phone buzzes.

Snapchat: ASH😎 sent you a photo

I quickly slide my finger across the screen to open up the photo. My eyes widen as soon as I see what waits for me. It's a picture of Asher holding up his shirt, showcasing his built abs underneath his work uniform. His V-lines dip into the waistband of his pants–

aaand, it's gone.

"No, no, no, come on" I groan.

The STUPID thing about Snapchat is the fact that the pictures erase after a few seconds. How fucking idiotic is that?

NiceASHhole: Did my SugarDaddyCam like that? *laughing emoji*

Me: I didn't even see it. I demand a refund.

NiceASHhole: Nice try. That'd be 20 dollars.

I roll my eyes and drop my cell phone back on the counter. I look at my reflection in the mirror and run my hand through my hair.

I'm fucking pathetic. Who am I kidding? Asher knows what he's doing. Doesn't he?

This is bad. This is so bad. I should be begging Lex for nudes which she would happily send me any second I asked. But here I am, salivating at the two seconds of seeing my best friend's body.

I turn on the shower and hop in.

I've been so fucked up over him for God knows how long and I can't help it.

He either can't see it or has ignored it all our life and that just makes me more needy for it.

I groan, washing my face with the warm water.

I hate how much that simple photo messed with my head, yet again. Doesn't he know what he does to me? I grab some body soap from the shelf of the shower and squirt some in the palm of my hand.

Doesn't he get how fucking sexy he is? How his body makes me feel?

I rub the soap across my chest and feel the suds run down my stomach and on to my dick.

Closing my eyes, I imagine they're his hands on my body. Roaming, exploring and admiring.

Fuck, Asher.

I imagine his lips on my neck, making their way down to my nipples. Biting and sucking on them, marking me as his.

His hands travelling lower until they grip my dick. Pumping me softly as he kisses the side of my neck.

This is so fucking wrong. It feels so damn good.

My body starts to tremble as I imagine his hands working their way to my balls. Squeezing and massaging them like they're perfect for him. I can picture him on his knees, staring up at me, begging to put me in his mouth.

Holy shit, Asher. You can have it all. Take it all.

I pump my dick harder at the thought. It's becoming too much. The thought of him bending over for me. Spreading himself open for me. Letting me taste him, lick him and fuck him with my tongue. What would he sound like? Would he whimper? Would he cry out for me?

I feel the pressure rising and the pleasure building all through my body.

Oh fuck, yeah. Asher, beg for me.

Suddenly, there are another pair of hands in the mix. They're coming up behind me, pressing into my chest, holding me close to their broad, strong body.

I pump myself faster.

Those hands, they look like my own, only tattooed. They're gripping me hard, strong and demanding.

I reach behind myself and slip my finger between my crease until I can feel my opening. Pressing lightly, I make my way into myself.

But only, in my head these aren't my fingers inside of me. No, this is his body pressed into me. He's fucking me while Asher is on his knees for me.

This is wrong, this is so fucking wrong.

But as the dream continues, so does that realization inside of me that it's exactly what I needed. They're both handling me so fucking well and soon I can't see anything at all. The pleasure is blinding.

It's so wrong but it feels...exactly right...

I imagine his mouth against my neck, sucking me until it hurts. He plunges himself inside my ass one more time and I come undone. 

I moan and my legs feel numb as I come all over the shower floor. Ecstasy spreads through me and I feel so light and alive.

Breathing heavily, I come to.

That wasn't the first time I imagined the two of them in the shower and I know deep down it won't be the last.

Each time I swear to myself it'll be different and each time I'm proven so wrong. 

A/N: I told you this book was taboo! I warned you!!! Why do you have a shocked face on your face!??!!