Fifty Seven

I have been drinking again and it hasn't been helping me sleep well at night. I hooked up with so many people, and they never really stuck around for more, and that made me feel guilty knowing there could've been more that I should've done in that kind of situation.

Maybe I was selfish, and it was a bitter reality I couldn't handle. But maybe they also could've been more selfish with some of the actions they have perpetrated against me. I felt like I deserved it; that it didn't matter to them that I was struggling and hell bent on making things work out even they weren't exactly working out just as they were initially supposed to.